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The Magpie

Sunday, August 2nd, 2020   |   76 comments

Now It’s Judge Jenny: Mayor Mullet Gets The Magpie’s Golden Stiletto Award For Hypocrisy.

Our Mayor is living proof of the adage ‘tis better to keep your mouth shut and let others think you a fool, than open it and prove them right.’

Didgeridoo or Didgeridon’t: when on-line death threats are OK, even applauded by the our wonky ‘woke’ luvvies.

Columnist Joe Aston nails The Beetrooter and his happy Campion: Now the tears of mirth have finally dried and the gasping for air after helpless laughter has subsided, The ‘Pie now accepts that he is but a rank amateur in the annals of hilarious bitchery. And as an extra, The ‘Pie photograph exclusively shows  the moment it all started between the star-crossed lovers.

Is the Horn/Tszyu dust-up about to KO the Townsville ratepayer? Given all the purple prose and signs of panic at the business end of the bout, could be a rocky time ahead in what is shaping up as a major economic fillip for the city.

… and the ad for bargain wine that threw The ‘Pie into deep contemplation.

But first

The Magpie Socks It To ‘Em

Or according to Bentley, ‘sox’ it to ‘em. Looking at the possibility of masks becoming mandatory in Queensland, Benters seems to think should that come about, The ‘Pie will not be put to any much trouble or expense.

Beak mask small

Most appropriate, since The ‘Pie is constantly being told to ‘put a sock in it.’

Word Coinage Of The Year

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The Courier has come with a perfect portmanteau word to describe those people who flout corona virus restrictions and stupidly endanger others … covidiots. At least, that’s where The ‘Pie first saw it, nevertheless a great contraction.

Prompted by the gum chewing, hair flicking trio of botox-challenged border hoppers, covidiots neatly summed up their selfish, brain-dead antics. And fair enough, too. But what wasn’t fair enough – although wholly expected once their photos were names were mysteriously released – was the generally vile racist pile-on that followed on social media. That led to one of the nastiest pieces of media cynicism from Network 9, who interviewed the developmentally delayed brother of one of the girls, who said the official targeting of the girls was simply a racist smear and wouldn’t have happened to any other ‘white’ person.

Like fuck it wouldn’t have, but let us not mock the mentally afflicted any further.

However, The Magpie thinks there is another fair point to consider. As Australians, the minimum we are entitled to expect from those taking advantage of this country’s generous migrant and refugee intake is that they are law abiding, and not given to criminal activities. So, depending on the status of the girls and their families … visas, residency and/or citizenship …  and their alleged links to organized crime now under investigation, would it not be fair for their status to be reviewed?

After all, Peter Dutton is keen on deportation of not just New Zealand crims, even those who lived practically all their lives and have served their time, but also of productive, law abiding, tax paying asylum seeker families, like the Nadsalingham family from Biloela (currently costing the taxpayer untold tens of thousands of dollar for incarceration on Christmas Island). That this family couldn’t have been simply monitored in situ in Biloela until their court issues are sorted out is a deeply disturbing glimpse of the callous fixed-stare fanaticism of Peter Dutton.

But As They Say, There’s No Show Without Punch …

So step up, Mayor Mullet.

Jenny and Les

Our gormless gal has an embarrassing history of bumptious, even gauche, interventions in matters of no concern to the ‘independent’ mayor of a provincial city (Qantas boycott, advising the Feds on Commonwealth matters – this week, defence – currying personal favour with billionaire miners).

Now Judge Jenny resumed her role as unofficial … and uninformed … advisor to the Queensland judiciary. She has clearly engineered an arrangement with the Townsville Bulletin to give her a free pass into wider arenas in which she has no voice and no business, so it was hardly surprising when she waded into covidiots’ saga on Friday. But as The Magpie pointed out in comments, Jenny Hill doesn’t realize what she’s saying a lot of the time.

The Magpie
4,537 approved

QUOTE OF THE YEAR:

Mayor Mullet wins the Hypocrite’s Gold Stiletto Award with this quote in today’s Astonisher story:
“We live in a community, for once we have to be thinking about the community not about us as individuals.”

‘For once’, Jenny??? What an inadvertent admission, Madam Mayor!!!

You also grabbed your Judge Jenny gavel and called colourfully and embarrassingly for the the two COVID breakers to ‘rot in jail’ if it was proved they had caused any death through careless actions.

YOU ARE KIDDING, JENNY HILL, REALLY.

The double standard is breath-taking. The parents of motorcyclist Darryl Andrew Lynch, who died in a collision with your turning car earlier this year share your sentiment about prosecution of those whose careless actions cause death. But they will have to wait a lot longer than the Covidiots to learn the outcome of the clearly politically tainted police investigation of their son’s death.

Secret Women’s Business: Banning Blow Jobs

Down those didgeridoos, girls, or you’ll become as barren as a Broncos win sheet. That’s the dire warning that our First Australian folk and their sox’n’sandals supporters are demanding.

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In the latest of those tediously sanctimonious Change.org petitions (which are mostly useless and are started as a just virtue signalling exercise), one Hayley Barwick accuse the women taking part in this …

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… of ‘stealing our culture and appropriating it in such a disgusting way.’

What next? The Arkansas-Virginny Backwoods Banjo Brethren seeking to be the only ones to pluck their instruments, the German Beirkeller Guild demanding an end to the cultural misappropriation of the Accordion (The ‘Pie is with them there, any restriction is fine by him). And wait until the Frogs at the Academie des Beaux-Arts fly into a typically Gallic hissy fit about world orchestras using French horns.

Turns out the culture Ms Barwick has got her Victoria’s Secret Womens Business undies in a jumble about is the deeply anti-feminist notion that ‘in aboriginal culture, laws prevented women from playing the didgeridoo , and for a woman to do so was disrespectful to the culture, ancestors and the Dream Time.’ And also no doubt to the men who made up the rule.

So much for woke 2020, with many of the white ‘liberated’ gals of our time supporting this call. But hang on,  wouldn’t that be the same woke women who railed against the outdated sexist culture of Saudi Arabia that until recently forbade women to drive? Welcome to Ironyland.

Another supporter of this ridgey didge fairytale – also clearly no fan of Gloria Stenheim – told the paper she was told by her elders never to touch a didgeridoo, as it would cause infertility, or worse.

Or worse? Like …?

Oh, right, gotcha. The one thing worse for a woman than infertility would be an tricky proposition of immaculate conception, hard to explain before the invention of Rohypnol. There is historical evidence of this ‘worse’ situation; it was claimed to have happened once in the Dream Time of Christianity. And look where that got us.

But then the nonsense takes a much more sinister turn, which, no matter how it is dressed up in gobbledygook, it is an online death threat.

The Astonisher quoted this post on the FB page of a Dutch woman planning to take part in the event.

“The Ancestors are watching you and will meet you in your dreams, warning you that you and your friends would be marked for death through a traditional Aboriginal curse known as “pointing the bone”.

If this is culture, then it is a culture of superstitious, manipulative barbarism, the hallmark inter alia of Christianity and Islam and very much akin to the newer version, the nightmare time of Scientology.

And ‘pointing the bone’? The closest we get to that ancient threat (of which an essential part for it to work is believing it) is said to be the habit of various indigenous inmates of our jails harassing weaker fellow prisoners in a secret ceremony after lights out called ‘pointing the boner.’

Is The Mayor Again Using Ratepayer Funds For Favourable Self-Profiling?

Let The ‘Pie be on the record that he sincerely hopes the Horn/Tszyu fight goes ahead without a hitch, or any unpleasant virus aftermath. And at the moment, no real reason why it shouldn’t, although the antics of the promoter during the week, raised a few eyebrows.

The Magpie
4,537 approved

Animal cruelty corner: Flogging a dead horse … and talk about giving the game away!


The real point of this story is that the philanthropic Mr Lonergan is in deep shit, failing to whip up a financially exhausted local populace to fill his coffers to replace all those Melbourne and Sydney punters who can’t now attend. The giveaway is in the last line of this second ‘advertisement’.

The August 26 fight will have a capacity crowd of 16,000, and Lonergan said all ticket categories were still available.
“No category has been sold out yet. We’re still be making tickets available for all categories, including the cheapest ($29) tickets,” he said. It’s a quality fight and we want to make it affordable for all spectators.”

Isn’t he a peach?

And what but desperation could be behind this absolute childish rot in today’s paper.

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But a separate and very serious question is raised by the event. While the it will be a great beneficial blip on the city’s economic radar, the question lingers: are being conned by our mayor and circle-jerk council, once again is trying to lift themselves up by their shoe laces?

The template has been there for years with the V8 SuperPests … the council tips in a veiled and opaque quantity of funds, and there has never been a definitive independent study of the benefits or otherwise of this whole exercise, from a sport peopled wall to wall with conmen. And if that is so for the V8s, make that in spades for anything to with boxing.

So here’s a test for the council … and for the Bulletin, if one of their uncompromising, tough questioning investigative journalists (oh, Lordy, how The ‘Pie amuses himself sometimes) would care to ask : how much has the council agreed to pay the promoters on behalf of all the ratepayers of Townsville, considering that only 16,000 punters will be allowed in.

But never fear, we’ll soon know, as the TCC website itself says:

TCC transparent adimage1

Maybe in this election year, we should ask Anna Alphabet the same question, keeping in mind her three current Townsville members are sitting on ejection seats.

In All, Enough To Drive You Drink

As tough as fiscal times are just now,  be wary… in these tight times, one must still remember the truism ‘if an offer is too good to be true, then it probably is’. The ‘Pie has been pondering this junk email ad he received during the week … great price but ….

Ebay wine ad Screen Shot 2020-07-25 at 11.19.05 am

‘Brand New Condition’? Wine?

As versus what? Used only once? Pre-loved and pre-tested? And the added concern that it is supposedly red wine – those doing the recycling would be in serious need of a doctor. And that note of ‘98.3% positive feedback’ … from the pathology lab?

Sorry if you find this a bit hard to swallow, folks, not to worry, The Magpie is just taking the piss.

Speaking Of Taking The Piss

The world of gossip columnist, muckrakers and ‘colour writers’ is essential reading for a wanabee like The Magpie, and he is constantly reminded just how far down the pecking order of comic talent he is when he reads the likes of the simply brilliant, side-splittingly funny and excoriating Marina Hyde in the Guardian. But sadly this week, the old bird had to take himself down a further notch, when he read Joe Aston in The Financial Review, and his take down of The Magpie’s former colleague Vicki Campion and her hubby Beetrooter Barnaby. This more than gold, it is the platinum standard for this type of writing, so much so, The ‘Pie is taking the rare (and maybe illegal .. so sue me) step of re-publishing the whole thing from the Australian Financial Review.

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The ‘Pie is green with envy, but certainly not of the penis variety. His last visual memory of good-time gal Vicki at the Townsville Bulletin was on the morning of her last day. Decked out in her Flinders Street East white cocktail party frock she had worn the night before, she was curled up under desk of the deputy editor, gently snoring and blowing bubbles. The ever severe Chief of Staff, Bettina Warburton nee Giardina was not amused … but then, Bettina never was. Making it worse for the COS was the fact that apart from being Vicki’s last day, she was even then a favourite of the then editor TB Mick Carroll.

By coincidence, during the week, a photo was supplied to The Magpie, purporting to show the very moment when the adventure between the Beetroot and The Happy Camper started all those years later.

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Credibility Corner

You can bet the adrenaline was really pumping over at long-established and well known Townsville business Adrenaline Dive … but not for the thrill of the adventure, more the exasperation of the misadventure.  This would have been a great free ad for the company, a front page splash (no pun intended).

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Small problem … it was in a paper known for it’s sloppy blunders, and here was one right on the front page … they got the name of the company wrong!

Adrenaline grabScreen Shot 2020-08-01 at 9.49.55 am

Adrenaline Drive!?! So …Dive Right In, after you ‘drive’ right out to the reef, eh?

A careless front page fuck-up makes you wonder about the level of care and honesty in the rest of the rag. Send answers in on the back of your favourite tourism postcard. Actually, don’t bother, we already know.

And here they are, cleverly hidden in plain view on the Astonisher’s favourite news source, Facebook.

Adrenalin Dive13087714_10153541492620267_5789076859327344041_n

And While We’re Talking Drives

A small digression. The ‘Pie was greatly mystified on his return to Townsville 20 years ago that the city boasted a thoroughfare called Urine Drive. It had to be pointed out to the old bird … by the deeply Catholic deputy editor … that it was Hugh Ryan Drive, named for some deceased pooh-bah of the local church. And speaking of names ….

Police Officer Of The Week

Grim find Screen Shot 2020-07-30 at 9.23.11 am…and the name of the detective who made the find … surely it would have to be Dick Tracer.

The Twitterverse Is About To Implode Later This Week

Trump will have bleeding thumbs within hours of the happy event. This from the week just past.

biden announceScreen Shot 2020-07-30 at 11.13.29 amBiden has already promised his running mate will be a woman, and there is big pressure on him for him to choose one of the four black women on the final list of 13.

Whoever it is, she can kiss her arse goodbye as to privacy and an ordered, equitable and fair life. There are those around the world who will be sweating on the choice, itching to unburden themselves of their political (and racial) wisdom. Why even here in Townsville, regular Magpie commenter, the mildly demented and local Trump cheerleader who calls himself Tropical, is so excited at a new target, he is sleeping in front of his computer, as this pic shows.

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Meanwhile, Down The White House Rabbit Hole …

The Tangerine Terrorist, the wilful killer of tens of thousands of Americans, is slowly starting to realize that he may well be a victim of corona virus … albeit a political victim. Critics say that slowly dawning reality is behind his jackboot policy of sending in Federal forces only to democratic controlled cities, as he strives to be seen as the law and order candidate. (Irony, anyone?). Even that doesn’t seem to be working his way, so this week he floated the idea of delaying the election … a thought fart roundly rejected by Dems and Republicans alike.

This is gunna be fun, but deadly fun, one suspects. The country’s penmen are already enjoying themselves, as is Andy Borowitz in The New Yorker.

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……………………

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76 Comments

  1. One legged tap dancer says:

    Perhaps, in the interests of transparency, our only “independent” councillor Sue Blom can enlighten us to how much ratepayers money has been paid to the boxing promoter, and whether Jenny has also thrown in a guarantee of ticket sales.
    Are you still out there Sue?

    • The Magpie says:

      But she is only going to known what she is told by The Mullet. These things are sometimes broad brushed by the mayor and councillors and flick passed to public servants, so the details can be easily obscured until annual reports are in.

  2. Footy Fan says:

    The playing surface at the Cowboys stadium is looming as a major problem.
    Players were slipping and sliding all through the game on Saturday and the surface was covered in divots.
    Highly respected Ch9 rugby league commentator Brad Fittler described the Townsville surface as “a bit how’s your father” on the Footy Show today.
    At the game a bloke sitting near me suggested the fast growing grass they chose for the stadium was the problem.
    Oh dear!

  3. Alahazbin says:

    “A smarter faster council”
    There is a Storm Inlet Pit (SIP) in my street that has been damaged since just after the 2019 floods.
    Sent a photo of said SIP with witches hats and para webbing placed around it by council well over 16 months ago on June 30th.

    Received a reply with council reference number. Job still not done.
    Obviously that is not what they mean with their slogan.

    • The Magpie says:

      Send in the pic to email hidden; JavaScript is required

    • Sign of the timez says:

      While we are on about council and speed. Has anyone noticed that all the works around Townsville, new bike path Abbott st, ogden st upgrade, the ridiculous one way palmer st and round a bout in deeragun. All these that ive seen with QLD government sings up advertising jobs for QLD or creating jobs for QLD I should say. So where are the jobs created?? These are upgrades done by the very workers in TCC that already have a job, if it serves correct, it is there job. NO NEW JOBS! Speed in getting a job done from money TCC didnt have. Sandbagging sests in Townsville mayby?

  4. The Magpie says:

    So, if you are an LNP supporter, whon do nyou vote foir, the choice is not clear.

    https://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Screen-Shot-2020-08-02-at-9.44.56-am.png

    Deb Frecklington, or Deb Frecklingon?

  5. The Magpie says:

    Probably not that it makes much difference, but still … regional Australians are again second class citizens.

  6. Bender says:

    Read your wine post Townsville Magpie – beware of scams involving buying wine from some online spruikers. You might be surprised by what lobs on your doorstep, if anything arrives at all!

    If you do get a delivery, check it carefully, it might have real piss in it and a bit of food colouring etc. Obviously only buy from reputable dealers, if there is still such a thing in the current world. HIC

  7. Dr Felchy says:

    Trump must be sick! Not sick from COVID because the great America has it completely under control. But sick because the American GPD has just hit an all time disastrous retraction of a whopping 33%. Not since WW2 has this occurred, not even during the 87 crash, 9/11 and the 2008 crash. You are watching the death of an economy, the death of the US dollar as the global standard and the complete implosion of a civilisation. You ain’t seen nothing yet! The debt level of Townsville and the lack of any advancement economically over the past 5 years is going to hit us in the arse harder than Elton John at a a Ladyboy party. The collapse of the USA is close. The flowdown efeect will be like nothing we have ever experienced. Brace for impact.

    • Dave says:

      Economic growth is linked to activity and growth, so google Worldmeter and you will see the global population is increasing everyday by over 150,000 new human beings, despite wars, starvation, and COVID.

      Profits of doom have been around forever and are rarely if ever correct.

  8. Mike Douglas says:

    Queensland Labor Government gives back $195 mil Federal funding on Haughton pipeline stage 2 but continues on the Brisbane Cross river rail costing $7-10 bil with no Federal funding ?. Labor T.C.C. can’t build a $2 mil demountable Cafe on Castle Hill . Did any of our local State MP,s , Councillors , Mayor take a 20% pay cut like many Townsville workers . We know none are with the 20,000 locals that were on Jobkeeper . Is polling so bad for the State election in October the State Government is pork barrelling our $ to prop up other areas? .

    • The Magpie says:

      Yes.

      • Gunnery Sgt Carter says:

        Well Gomer Pyle, our local Fed member, are you out there? WHAT is the explanation for this? Response please? Queensland taxpayers smashed again by the Qld Govt, or The Feds?

        • The Magpie says:

          As always with these state and Federal twisters (aka politicians), it’s a matter of who you believe. On the face of it so far, Thompson is making the most believable argument, convincingly shooting down Dick’s very shaky argument that to release the Fed money, Queensland will be hit with $156m GST bill. Thompson points out that that figure would only be reached if ALL federally assisted projects in ALL of Queensland were subject to GST (not all are). And that because of the timing, there is no way Dick could even make a case for this as an accurate figure. And returning money already in their coffers will take some selling to the electorate.

          At this stage, given the desperation of the Palaszczuk government in the run-up to the election, it is a dicey gamble based on them secretly and strategically having surrendered the three Townsville seats but appealing to a state-wide audience about nasty feds ripping off taxpaying Queenslanders (as the state government is doing selectively with their X-river rail extravaganza). The capitulation of the Townsville seats makes political sense, because apart from the simmering rage around the crime issue, not unreasonably, many people are angry that the south-east centric Palaszczuk simply dismissed out of hand a strong case for a North Queensland COVID bubble for business.

          Two things The Magpie sees in the coming weeks … Labor homing in on the LNP’s weak spot, which is actually not a spot but a freckle … sadly for supporters, the mimsy, politically dainty Frecklington just doesn’t cut a believable authoritative figure and Labor will play this card to the hilt.

          On the other side, expect a whole heap of Federal election dollars both here and elsewhere hammering a state government that (they will say) invents financial lies to foster the fear factor.

          Anna Alphabet is now heavily … almost solely … counting on her determined and steadfast showing on the virus front …. and state Labor will highlight her resolute stand which, agree with her not, shows strong leadership, further enhanced by Frecklington’s lack of political mongrel.

          • Not the ECQ says:

            Mr Magpie it’s easy for you to propose that federal member Thompson is making the most believable argument about the GST and the pipeline when all Thompson is doing is saying the other guy is wrong. What would be good to know is a single uncontested fact. Was it the intention of the Feds to reduce GST payments to Queensland by some amount because the proposed Stage2 pipeline, to which the Feds were ‘granting’ $195m, would be considered a “state asset”? Apparently the Queensland Treasurer’s opinion was wrong (OK, got that on board) so what is the correct interpretation? And while the experts are at it, what of the Feds $100m contribution for the stadium? Is it a “state asset” now? Will there be a reduction in the GST payment to Queensland because of that specific item?

          • The Magpie says:

            The answer to the first part of your questions would be, from what The ‘Pie has read, yes, there would be a deduction in GST related to the pipeline, because it will be a business proposition making money for the Queensland Government … that has always been the arrangement under universal GST rules. And if that is correct, the amount would be in the vicinity of $9mill or so tops … where Dick proved to be a dick was over-egging and over-complicating his argument into outright dishonesty for political purposes … there is absolutely no way, suggestion or possibility that a $195mill funding could attract approx. 67% $156mill GST reduction. The stupidity is that even the $9mill deduction would’ve been a nice red herring for Dick, but his overkill has rebounded on his dunce’s head.

            On the question of the stadium money, the Feds would have trouble arguing that it is a money making concern, The Magpie cannot find any stadium anywhere in Australia makes a profit … i.e. a real profit, not just paper fiddling. Happy to be corrected, but will be super surprised. And the Feds can’t argue that the stadium would brings extra revenue to the government through increased business activity … any benefit there is almost entirely federal through increased …. you guessed it …. GST returns.

            Worth keeping tabs on.

          • Not the ECQ says:

            And if that is correct, the amount would be in the vicinity of $9mill or so tops …

            And you found the formula for this calculation where? Surely not from Phillip Thompson? He wrote to me this afternoon saying that “The $195 million for Stage Two of the Haughton Pipeline is fully funded by the Federal Government.” No mention of the GST cream-off ($9m you say) that will occur if Qld takes the money, no mention of the multi-millions extra that Stage1 will cost if Stage2 is not built concurrently.

            Also, if, as you say, that has always been the arrangement under universal GST rules, then Member Thompson’s pamphlet from a fortnight ago makes it clear that the stadium will be considered a “state asset” regardless of whether it makes money. Why won’t they just come clean? Instead of bagging the other guy, why not put everything on the table for all to see?

          • The Magpie says:

            Hahahahaha … that last line, coming from you, is hilarious!!!

            And being the Labor luvvie you are, conveniently and selectively skipped any mention of the more salient point that Dick had no grounds to come with the scary $156mill figure. Count your blessings, ECQ, your biggest one being The Freckle.

  9. Bentley says:

    Didn’t a couple of Australian companies send tons of face masks to China earlier in the pandemic? Then we were advised that masks did not prevent the spread of the virus. I wonder where Victoria would be now had we been better advised.

    • NQ Gal says:

      Bently – Transmission in Victoria can be nailed down to the completely inept hotel quarantine process. Once it got from the hotels into the community is has run rife, not helped by those that are infected not self isolating and the Karens who think their personal rights outweigh any responsibility to the community.

      My brother in Melbourne is absolutely livid that everyone who was already doing the right thing are now being punished for the actions of the stupid. I’m sending him more masks today.

      • The Magpie says:

        Agree wholeheartedly, Gal, but make the point that the Karen’s simply DON’T HAVE the rights they claim to have, probably not at any time but certainly not in this emergency.

    • Tropical says:

      Bentley that was two Chinese businessmen that sent two planeloads of PPE to China having gone on a huge spending spree.

      • The Magpie says:

        Do you mean that the two Australian citizens of Chinese extraction were operating businesses here in Australia, and sent the PPEs to China, or the businessmen were Chinese who came here and bought up big?

        • Not the ECQ says:

          27 March 2020, news.com

          Exclusive video taken at Perth airport shows bulk surgical masks being airfreighted to China last month as it is revealed a Chinese company sent 90 tonnes of Australian supplies to Wuhan.
          The video obtained by news.com.au shows the China-bound boxes of surgical masks stacked up at Perth airport on February 8.

          News.com.au can reveal the 90-tonne export of our supplies was made by a second Australia-based Chinese property company, on top of yesterday’s revelation of the bulk shipping of hand sanitiser, gloves and masks by a Chinese government-owned company, Greenland.

  10. winni says:

    Dr Felchy,

    did you mean GDP ?????????

    what is your source for this anti USA rant?

    so are you a Medico or just another useless arts PHD who is anti USA

    • Dr Felchy says:

      Winnie, firstly you are correct – GDP.
      Secondly, the USA GDP financial information is all out there on the Internet so go do your own searching. 32.9% to be precise. If you weren’t already aware of the figure then it shows that you are the one who needs educating in finances. Thirdly, it’s not an anti-USA rant. I am highlighting that the USA is economically collapsing and that will continue to effect us. And if it was a rant it would be against the Federal Reserve and Wall Street. Lastly, I’m not an arts student, PHD wanker or anti USA. I am a Townsville local who watches world finances closely and pays attention to what is happening, which is the opposite of what you and the Mullet are doing.

      • Grumpy says:

        So…are you a doctor or not?

      • Fat Tony says:

        Wow Feltch, you certainly reached deep into the glory hole knowledge to come up with those inspiring pearls of wisdom.

        You do realise though that the pandemic is not exclusive to the US with most parts of the world including Europe, Asia and of cause Australia all deeply affected by virus and the economical consequences of it. And yes, the US “PGD” has hit a all time low but so has ever other major financial market in the world.

        Australia woes can not be correlated solely with how Trump has handled his finances. I’m sure our lack of manufacturing, reliance on China, tourism and our own sense of entitlement for handouts from the government has had more of a impact on our dollar then the state of the greenback.

        So at the risk of being branded the third Nimwit to question your credentials, may I suggest you stick to your specialty in the field infectious diseases and leave the serious discussions to the adults.

        • The Magpie says:

          You err on a couples of points, Fats … the reference to the American economy is directly in reference to Trump’s boastful bullshit on the subject until it started to openly tank … and the good doctor, if he were one, has little to with infectious diseases, but he would be more a proctologist.

        • Dr Felchy says:

          Fuck some people cannot read. Fat ass Tony, indeed you are a nimwit as you reference myself and medical fields/infectious diseases of which I know nought about. And yes, other countries GDP figures are blowing out and are setting records for the worst in 50 years, but those countries you reference do not have their own dollar acting as the Global currency standard. It is the USD that counts. If it collapses it takes the globe down with it, including Australia. The collapse has already commenced. And I never said I blame Trump. Trump inherited a lemon. The beginning of the end comm need way back in 71 when Nixon abolished the gold standard. Currencies normally only last 40 to 50 years, but you would know that already being the big financial top gun that you think you are. The spiral commenced before COVID, but the onset of COVID has escalated the inevitable collapse decades in the making. Tony, did you honestly think that increasing debt and printing paper money would last forever? The Ponzi scheme is collapsing.

  11. Gerry f says:

    I would like to fill you all in on the less then zero leadership our mayor showed this weekend at the holden car rally at Ross dam. Todd martin put this together and i took my wife along because we do have a love of older cars. Where does hill fit in you might ask? Well todd approached her about the public toilets that wernt working. She had been parading around big noting herself as usual. She tokd Todd that she will call the 24hr TCC hotline to fix this immediately. Her trouble started when her service went to message bank. No not les walker. Apparently she left shortly after because of embarrassment and maybe the fact that every guy there were just hanging it out and pissing in the bush for everybody to see. I know alot of people were looking for her as word got around. I know of two council workers (not working) there who told me that budgets have been cut hard and not surprised that toilets arnt working. It happens everywhere because TCC have contractors who have been told to cut back services too. Same as lawnmowers TCC have too i guess lookinf around the city. But hey we are getting all this publicity with the new stadium and all the grass being ripped up on national television. How much is TCC stumping up for v8s doon? If all budgets have been cut.

  12. Salty Dog says:

    Let’s face it, all pollies at the moment are scared shitless, regardless of party. They took for granted they had been elected to run cake raffles. Now they are faced with a situation in which they could be asked to take responsibility for peoples’ lives. No-one knows where Covid is going and these guys are beginning to feel the strain.

  13. WTAF says:

    Victoria is out of control.

    Australian’s went to wars to fight totalitarianism.

    • The Magpie says:

      From this week’s blog.

    • The Magpie says:

      And someone agrees with you.

      • Critical says:

        Wonder how true this comment is but overheard at a major health place around town that Qld Health is preparing for possible Crovid-19 community transmission in 4-6 weeks time. Had to think why the time period and worked out that it’s around the time of the fight at the Stadium and the V8’s so there’ll be many visitors here and I doubt that many will be adhering to social distancing or wearing face masks.

        • The Magpie says:

          Come of it, Crits, trying to disguise you’re own theory like this with ‘overheard’ bullshit is a bit insulting to your commenting brethren. ‘Health place’? Get off the fuckin ‘grass, mate, this ain’t FB.

          Man up, man.

          BTW pretty reasonable theory.

        • Critical says:

          Try hospital cafe

        • Not the ECQ says:

          Crits the Townsville University hospital has been re-jigged and set up for a surge in local transmission cases for months now. They already know which wards will be set aside, how the ICU will/can be segregated and extended and all sorts of scenarios have been thought through – up to a point. Meanwhile, it’s business as usual until something changes, which hopefully it won’t.

          • Grumpy says:

            NECQ – it would have been criminally negligent if they had not made contingency plans for contingency plans. They were just doing their job.

  14. Dave says:

    What a bunch of ungrateful fucks we are in Townsville. Good to see our State Treasurer Dick has cemented Townsville to last place for any future funding. I think there are about 10000 towns in Australia too.

    Total Tools stadium would still be mud flats if not for the Federal government and we’d be fucked without public servants including the army.

    The State can’t even control their own companies, I see all of the executives who once lived in Townsville for Ergon and Energy Queensland have fucked off back to Brisbane.

    Bring on the election.

  15. Mike Douglas says:

    Not the ECQ . Having seen Cameron Dicks train wreck interview on Qld State Govt offering Virgin $200 mil ? begs the question . Has anyone from Treasury explained to the new Treasurer that Qld receives $1.09 for every $1.00 collected as part of the States gst allocation by the Feds .

    • Not the ECQ says:

      Hey Mike I hardly ever venture down the GST rabbit hole but I did know that Qld gets slightly more back in GST payments than it submits (per capita). However, there are quite a few variables and politically massaged add-ons which aren’t always obvious. Here’s one from 2019:

      “Ms Trad said despite the states securing a “no worse off guarantee” as part of the transition to the new GST distribution formula last year, Queensland would lose $560 million in GST payments next financial year because of the national write-down and the now inclusion of natural disaster payments to local government in calculating a state’s share.”

      Then from July this year:

      “States and territories are set to miss out on $12.8 billion in GST payments over the two years to mid-2021 due to the coronavirus impact on household spending and home buying.
      The Morrison government’s latest budget update released on Thursday noted a $5.2 billion drop in GST for 2019/20 and $7.6 billion in 2020/21.”

      I can’t find an itemised list of federal funding that caused a deduction in GST payments although I suppose there’s one out there somewhere. Also, there are some federally funded projects (roads, tunnels, bridges) that don’t cause a deduction.

      • Old Tradesman says:

        So not the ECQ if they are going to receive less, due to the fact that they are producing less, how can they suddenly cough up $200m for Virgin, $195m for the pipeline, $150m here, millions elsewhere, considering that none of this has appeared in the budget, you know the one that hasn’t been submitted. Are we going to sell assets like the 1300 Smiles Stadium, or borrow money from China to add to the already ballooning debt that was there before the virus landed?

        • Not the ECQ says:

          OT I imagine that Qld, like every other state, is burning money like it’s going out of style to prop up the economy – including throwing something at Virgin which employs thousands in the Brisbane HQ. $200m sounds oh-so-2019 these days eh? And if we get a second wave in this state and a lockdown like Victoria’s there’ll be shitloads more money going out the door – regardless of who or what party wins the October election.

          As for the $195m to start/finish Stage2 of the pipeline concurrently (and avoid the two step process including an unnecessary multi-million upgrade of the Haughton agricultural channel and pump station), that’s a great question. Clearly the Palaszczuk Labor government is unhappy with the money ‘deal’ from Canberra but perhaps Deb20 has a different angle, even a better offer? Cards on the table I reckon. More likely they’ll look at the Ross River dam, currently at 72%, and decide there’s no hurry and put it on the never never, or not. What would you do?

          • The Stasi says:

            Good Afternoon NOT the ECQ, are you a Labor Party paid advisor/supporter, or a very well informed ‘private citizen’ on matters to do with govt policy and procedures (or both)? We are keen to know who we are talking to when considering your lengthy, and very detailed, vociferous statements.

            Thank you.

          • Not the ECQ says:

            Mr Magpie, there is no ‘reply’ button at the bottom of Stasi’s comment so I have found another way. . .

            Stasi, I am not a Labor Party paid advisor/supporter and have not preferenced that party for several elections because of its Galilee Basin thermal coal mining platform. I do follow political developments though and I remember some things like they happened yesterday. I’m also on a few mailing lists and hear regularly from all sorts of riff raff. We can look up old news on the ‘net if we want to. It’s nearly all there if you try hard enough.

          • Old Tradesman says:

            Not the ECQ, the first thing I would do is to see that somebody who knows the rate of the GST, you commander in Brisbane, do you remember, didn’t know the rate of the GST and said it varied.

        • Not in SEQ says:

          Meanwhile in South East Queensland “State only” cash flows freely.

          Nobody up here except Robbie Katter ever raises the hypocrisy of Cross River Rail where the Premier and Treasurer had no trouble finding $5,600,000,000.00 for rail infrastructure that experts say isn’t needed. That is unless you are Jacki Trad who wants to divert trains away from her electorate.

          • Not the ECQ says:

            Maybe not, Not in SEQ, but Katter must have noticed that straight after the LNP won the federal election the Palaszczuk government put up $500 million for repair and upgrade work on the Mount Isa to Townsville railway. Half a billion is serious money even if it benefits mining companies almost exclusively.

          • The Bagmanif ECQ says:

            Mr Stasi, Not the ECQ is either a serving local politician, a former serving politician or business person who has benefited greatly by his/her Labor affiliates over the years. A high probability of paid favours, favourable decisions, bags of money and/or other measures of selfish financial gain that have transpired within a select little group of crooks. ECQ’s vocabulary is littered with Government/bureaucrat words and dialect. If ECQ is a he, he enjoys reading the life stories of staunch Labor leaders both past and present and jerks off while reading local Council reports and business papers.

      • Mike Douglas says:

        Not the ECQ . So add Premier Palasazczuk to the list of telling porkies as she said “closing the Qld border would have no financial impact on Qld “ . Anyone who understands finance / business knows if you reduce Southerners spending in Qld you reduce our Gst cut . I’m not debating the border closure simply highlighting untruths by Politicians .

        • Not in SEQ says:

          Not the ECQ, you can’t even read your ALP propaganda correctly. I doubt the Government will ever spend $500m on the Mt Isa Railway.

          Take your lies to a rail forum like this and the train nuts will tear you a new one https://railbotforum.org/mbs/index.php?topic=12097.0

          Robbie asked for money and all he got was lip service with existing QR expenditure rebranded as government funding. The problem for this government is the tell so many lies they forget what the truth is. Mt Isa Railway is funded by the rail companies not the government, ask anyone at Xstrata they will be happy to tell you.

          • Not the ECQ says:

            Not in SEQ, here’s a newspaper from back in June:

            “The Queensland government says a half a billion dollar plan to reduce access charges and build a new container port in Townsville will boost mineral freight exports on the Mount Isa railway line.

            Deputy Premier Jackie Trad said the investment would promote mining and exploration in the north west.

            She said freight charges will be discounted to support improved five-year spending on the line maintenance budget on the lsa line which had already been announced.”

            See if you can read the fucking thing you dill.

        • Not the ECQ says:

          By all means, Mike, add Annastacia to the list. But will it help get her unelected? I doubt it. The Qld LNP is waiting, waiting, waiting to see if Labor can screw itself any further before Deb20 takes a risk with any policy positions. Not sure she will have what it takes when the game really gets down and dirty but it will come soon enough.

  16. Turdball says:

    There are around a dozen COVID cases that have recorded at Potts Point. I do hope dear Malcolm and Lucy are safe. Then again…….

  17. One legged tap dancer says:

    If you think the White Elephant Stadium is costing taxpayers money, wait till the Cowboys so-called Centre of Excellence gets up and running.
    The Cowboys are spruiking that it will create 50 fulltime jobs.
    That’s 3 for every Cowboys team member!
    Can’t see the Cowboys paying their wages so taxpayers should brace for the pineapple.

    • The Magpie says:

      Well, that’s a tad ill-informed, Limpy. The Centre of Excellence will house all sorts of other goodies, like health professionals and some indigenous staff to further the footy careers of youngsters. This COE is a totally disgraceful impost on taxpayers, a total con on the CBD business community, and a massively wasted opportunity to get this city moving in the right direction.

      A nice little ‘fuck you Townsville’ present from Lozza Lancini.

  18. Mugwump says:

    Is Win News predicting or know something the public don’t about the State LNP leader?
    https://www.facebook.com/233459343336476/posts/4101077429907962/

  19. Cantankerous but happy says:

    After travelling here, there, different places over the last couple of weeks and talking to plenty of people I can only come to the conclusion that all these jobkeeper jobseeker payments and business grants is the greatest fucking con ever hoisted on the public of Australia. The amount of worthless basket case businesses that have pocketed a fortune from these govt payments is truly obscene, it’s a fucking disgrace. The govt should stop every single payment to every single business on Sept 30, no exceptions, this free for all has to end.

  20. I’ll be plucked says:

    Channel 7 local news, LNP announcing 60 extra coppers if elected; Cupcake Stewart in response says ‘We have employed an extra 105 officers and put $40 million into support programs to reduce crime’. Hey Cupcake, you insipid fool and failure as our local state member, here’s a NEWSFLASH………it’s not working and crime is out of control.

    C’mon October, so we can rid ourselves of this trough swilling ‘politician’ who has failed us miserably! ENOUGH AREADY!

  21. Critical says:

    I’m reading that not-for-profit organizations are saying that the government must extend Jobkeeper otherwise thousands of their employees will not have a job. I’m understand that some raise funds through funding raising activities and the like but this must be for a minimal overall number of staff as the majority of staff are paid from government grants. I’m at a bit of a loss to understand their claims about thousands of jobs being lost. Can anyone enlighten me on this issue or is it the do-gooders just after government funds again and using Crovid-19 as an emotive lever.

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