The time for merry jests, jibes and japes is over … outside circumstances during the week have proven that Kevin Gill is no joke, and he has a massive conflict of interest that has led to his bumbling, unethical attempts at rorting the Townsville flying public.
Also, right headline, wrong time … the Astonisher plays desperate catch-up, and throws in a little dollop of hypocrisy for good measure … but yippee anyway, our water problems are over … another committee has been appointed to ‘look into the issue’ …
Vale Bill Leak … you mightn’t like what he said, but you should have defended in his death his right to say it…
And speaking of political correctness, Victorian bureautwats want decide if you can walk the walk … or not …
And a little Magpie competition to titillate the inner journo in you …
But first …
Bentley is just the boy to look at the bigger picture, and in just what corner of the canvas Australia sits. He has been getting somewhat exercised over the sabre rattling just to our north, particularly by the boy-goth of North Korea, who might just lose it if he has another bad hair day – which looks imminent every day (like Trump, but like all comb-overs, he thinks it looks ‘terrfic, really cool, good dude’.)
But if things escalate, and its seems right now there is only an ‘up’ escalator working, Australia’s ‘turn back’ policies for unwanted intruders won’t be of any use if someone takes a dislike to our position (or a liking to our mining wealth). Bentley is deeply concerned.
A hairy situation in more than one way.
And the Trump train wreck continues to mesmerize us, and a growing awareness among this faithful has been neatly summed up in a Peanuts cartoon.
Another Reason To Be Thankful We Live In Townsville
God knows the list is getting shorter by the day but believe it or not, there are certain pointless sorts of idiocy that wouldn’t see the light of day up here.
In Melbourne, the tomfoolery tits have come up with a trial of female ‘walk-don’t walk’ pedestrian signs. (No I don’t know why either.) Perhaps we missed the groundswell of opinion against presumably male outline figures (that frankly, in this day and age, could be sheilas anyway). Or did they just want to break up those throngs of women standing at crossings, thinking it was a bloke’s only thing?
Not satisfied with making complete fuckwits of themselves globally, these urban einsteins at Vic Roads also have decided to honour ‘historically significant’ women. First cab of this particular rank was this effort honoring Mary Rogers, who as we all know, was the first female councillor in Australia.
One assumes Richmond has paid enough due respect in other ways down the years, fielding an AFL team largely perceived as a bunch of shielas. But this initial offering for the fringe element fuckwittery of gender equality has led to a confusion in the bibs’n’braces set who aren’t up their history … they think it is Mary Poppins.
Larry Pickering, a man known to generally genuflect to gender equality (not), is impressed with the idea.
Given this extreme, The ‘Pie sees problems ahead from the boilersuit brigade … eyes down, fellas, or you’ll be accused of up-skirting with your eyes.
Anyway, crossing are audio-armed as well … probably one of the few advantages of being blind.
And A Quick Note To Be Glad You Don’t Live In Adelaide
Not if you’re a News Ltd photographer.
Snappers are in a tizz down at the Curious Snail, because word has come through that all Advertiser photographers will get the boot at the end of the financial year. Reporters will pick up the role, with no doubt some hilarious results. Freelancers are out buying new invoice books and the latest box brownie.
In The ‘Pie’s experience, there have been many instances where photographers have picked reporters skills much more adeptly than vice versa (locally Ando being an exception to prove etc). But if the Advertiser sackings don’t cause any intolerable cock-ups (any bets, anyone?) it will be a sure thing that the dominos will tumble across Australia.
Just thought to keep you in the picture, folks.
Vale Bill Leak
Cartoonist Bill Leak
Like him or not, deplore his politics or not, cartoonist Bill Leak, who died an early death of heart failure at age 61 this week, refused to be brow-beaten or cowed by those with a vested interest in muzzling any opposition to their often insidious agendas.
Most recently in the spotlight when hauled before that sinkhole for public money, the massively misnamed Australian Human Rights Commission for this blunt, and to a majority, accurate assessment of the damage alcohol has on indigenous families.
Leak didn’t bully easily and came back swinging …
The matter was dropped after a few hundred thousand taxpayer dollars went down the plughole.
Leak had also done a collection of brutally hard cartoons over the years concerning aboriginal domestic violence which also drew fire. But those who said he was only targeting the disempowered who couldn’t fight back (complete codswallop) Leak had to sell his family home and go into secluded living because of Muslim threats on his life and that of his family for his fearless commentary on the dark side of Islam.
And still he called as he saw it.
The Magpie didn’t always agree with his somewhat brutal approach to social matters, but as Voltaire (actually never) said, ‘ I may disagree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.’
And for that reason alone – free speech – we should all miss him. Wish we had his equivalent at the Astonisher (yeah, right!) Until reality dawned just a short time ago, all the cartoons about kiddy crims in the Bulletin made the offenders white, which is the worst sort of jellybacked reverse racism imaginable.
First A Little Quiz, Then Later, A Little Competition
What is wrong with this Bulletin front page from last Tuesday?
Scratch your head if you will, since it is timely, clever and does what a front page should do, sum a story succinctly to encourage people to buy the paper and read about a critical community issue.
But here’s the thing … it’s at least ONE YEAR too late! This time last year, the Bulletin was denigrating and shafting Jayne Arlett’s bid for the mayoralty, a campaign she unwisely ran almost solely on the water crisis facing Townsville. The issue wasn’t anywhere near Mayor Mullet’s radar, let alone the Bulletin’s – if it was, why hadn’t we heard about from them? The paper prominently boosted Jenny Hill’s scoffing, airy dismissal ‘Water crisis, what crisis? There is no water crisis.’
And the rest is history, aided and abetted mightily by the Astonisher.
And what we’ve got on this day is the announcement that our woes will soon be gone, because … yippee, another bloody committee has been appointed, which is probably the only thing they could do (and most heartening to see a real doer, Brad Webb, heading up Townsville representation) BUT their final report is due by September NEXT BLOODY YEAR!!! 18 fucking months !!! Unbelievable.
Same game, different players.
But Some Handy Alternative Facts
There is the old saying that when you’re being run out of town, get to the head of the mob and make it look like a parade. And that is exactly what the News Ltd stewardship of a once-proud and respected paper is now doing.
And iditor Ben Bogan English cannot be bettered for bare-faced brazen bullshit. The paper is on the water bandwagon big time, while still boosting our recalcitrant mayor. The ‘no crisis thing’ Bogan off-handedly dismisses it as a mere peccadillo, and then astonishingly pats his own back after being dragged kicking and screaming into the issue. This from today’s fawning iditorial.
What? Again, the Bulletin’s cardinal sin is not what it says, it is what it doesn’t say.
The real reason he’s on the bandwagon is because of Linda Ashton and her co-founders of the Water For Townsville (WFT) group, whose Facebook page now has 10,000 members. Both he and the mayor, for different reasons, know they cannot ignore numbers like that, the mayor to make political hay while our abundant sun shines, and Bogan because he figures there could be a readership boost from those figures, (Too late, chum, the town is onto you.)
As the saying goes, sport, you’re a day late and a dollar short.
While We’re In The Bend Of The Dry River
The Water For Townsville group is powering along … but to where? The test of knowing what to do when they have the numbers behind them lies ahead. Have they got the nous to know that sooner or later, they will have to get down and dirty in the political mud pit.
Otherwise, what’s the use?
People who joined up have obviously made water their overriding priority, but will that translate into a pressure point of votes? Will the members pledge to vote for whoever makes the most believable policy?
Alarmingly, Ms Ashton declined advice (which included The Magpie) to tell the council bureaucracy to shove their pettifogging ‘move on’ order for WFT’s harmless trailer signage in the Riverway car park, and challenge them to take whatever (very doubtful) action they could take. Instead, which Ms Ashton very unwisely and very publicly posted on Facebook that she ‘would have a quiet word with the mayor when we next meet’.
Way too chummy, Linda, sounds like a slight delusional wielding of some sort of (probably imaginary) power behind closed doors with your pal, the mayor, a mayor remember, who has come to this issue as reluctantly as the Astonisher. Sounds like you’re being absorbed into the homogenous pie of Townsville politics, which is exactly what created the situation that led you to form WFT.
Keep up the good work, Linda, but keep your guard up, too – they cannot be trusted.
It’s Surely Decision Time For Kevin Gill
If not, for the Townsville Council.
Airport boss and TEL chairman Kevin Gill
You can only serve one master, Mr Gill, and for you, it is not possible to push the thieving agenda of your employers, Queensland Airports Ltd, while you are the board chairman of Townsville Enterprise, the (mainly) ratepayer funded body tasked with promoting tourism, investment and business in Townsville.
That others on the board undoubtedly used their positions to push their own agendas – notably the recently departed Laurence Lancini, JCU Vice-Chancellor Sandra Harding and Sealink ferry boss Paul Victory – but they were not the head of the board, and they did not make any attempt to place an unfair, retrograde impost on the people they are supposed to champion.
But you did.
And a pretty bumbling attempt it was, too, even with the cack-handed, self-interest of the Bulletin behind you. Making upgrades to infrastructure sound like philanthropy towards the community, when in fact it is simply business expansion to enhance your company’s bottom line, is fine except when you want the Townsville flying public to finance it for you. And as a monopoly, that is a bee’s dick away from outright thievery.
But this week has really given the game away, with a damning report showing the rip-off that the rapacious Australian airport business to be, an industry you represent in Townsville. And this.
Then there’s this too from a commenter during the week.
Cantankerous but happy
Interesting article on the Business insider today about per passenger airport charges at Australia’s main airports.
$12.25 Brisbane
$11.58 Melbourne
$14.48 Perth
$17.27 Sydney.
If we compare this to Townsville who currently charge $15.04 we are already near the top of the pile and only behind Sydney. If Numbskull Gill gets his way and lifts passenger charges by a further $3 we will be at $18.04 per passenger, the highest charges of any airport, what a disgrace, the people of Townsville should voice their disapproval of this increase in charges loud and often.
The brazen attempt to hoodwink airlines into forcing a ticket tax onto passengers simply to fund an airport expansion, which would really benefit no one but your parent company’s bottom line, can be nothing but a massive conflict of interest.
And its says a lot about the ineffectiveness of TEL under your stewardship which included your selection of the lightweight Patricia O’Callaghan as CEO. That appointment alone showed the contempt in which the board held Townsville and the region.
Qantas sorted you out in short, sharp and accurate language, adamant they would not come to such a party which they bluntly pointed out would be of benefit to your company only.
Have some decency and resign from the TEL board, Gill. You are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem
UK Professor Gets Bombed Live On TV … and Everyone Is Laughing.
It’s the photo-bombing of the decade.
The old adage is never appear in the limelight with kids or animals… it never ends well. That was the hard lesson learned by Professor Robert Kelly during a live BBC interview where he was giving his assessment of the effects of the impeachment of the South Korean president for some sort of fiscal naughtiness.
After the hilarity, the sad reality of our world quickly entered. The clip went viral, and the woman was described as the children’s nanny, or ‘the Asian woman’ … who just happens to be the children’s mother, the professor’s wife and is Korean. Racism is sure way to prove the to assume makes ‘an ass of u and me’.
Oh, And That Little Competition
The ‘Pie thought it might be fun to see if anyone can come up with any front page headlines we are likely to see in the Astonisher as the days go by. Particularly ones that feature Mayor Mullet and CEO sock puppet Patricia O’Callaghan.
A sample.
‘Jenny Hill Tips Queen To Visit Townsville’
Branch of Buckingham Palace to be built in Garbutt.
‘That’s a nice idea’ – TEL CEO Patricia O’Callaghan
See You Beaut Editorial – p6
Best entry will win a lunch with mayor Mullet (details TBA)
Runner up will win two lunches with mayor Mullet (at least those are the prizes that The Magpie tips.)
……………….
That’s it for another week, but have your say 24/7 in the comments. Keep an eye on the Magpie Facebook page, and there’s even the occasional tweet.
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