Why this blog exists...

The Magpie

Sunday, August 23rd, 2020   |   226 comments

Not All The Covidiots Have The Virus: Palaszczuk’s Cynical Corona Virus Election Campaign

It has been galling to watch politicians and their scapegoats transmute genuine virus control concerns into a campaign tool by a premier taking a desperate gamble. She’s betting the electorate will see her unnecessarily elongated actions as a maternal caring for Queenslanders. It’s a gamble is increasing looking like a bad bet … but then again, we are talking about Queensland voters.

And the Bulletin also peddles corina virus panic twaddle, some irresponsible reporting, all based on an ignorant anonymous whinger …

Revolting business: rates rort have leading Townsville businessman warning the mayor that they’re mad as hell and aren’t taking it any more … which finds The Daily Astonisher in a very tricky position …

Getting all biblical down in the Burdekin – will Last be first again: it’s seconds out for round two of the Burdekin Bash, Moscow Mike Brunker, who lost on a close split decision last election, laces up to have another tilt at Dale Last in October’s state poll.

Failed Bulletin iditor Peter ‘Typo’ Gleeson and now Sky TV squeaker goes all Pol Pot on Jobkeeper recipients …

And it’s on for young and old (if the latter live long enough) in Pandemerica

But first …

Forget Horn/Tszyu, the most entertaining stoush, painful low blows and all, is about to start in the seat of Burdekin, when former Whitsunday mayor ‘Moscow’ Mike Brunker takes on former copper and fitness fanatic Dale Last in the state election.

Mike Brunker Screen Shot 2020-08-21 at 8.59.25 am

It was a split decision last time, with Brunker losing on preference points …

Screen Shot 2020-08-22 at 9.54.09 pm

… but wonders just what Brunker means when he says he’s keen to take the fight up to his opponent.

Back in 2010, the strapping Brunker, then Whitsunday mayor and Labor candidate for Dawson, snotted 70-something Bowen Turf Club president Cyril Vains in a car park blue at the Bowen racecourse. Vain suffered cut when Brunker punched his glasses.

Screen Shot 2020-08-21 at 8.58.40 am

After a long legal process, Vains, initially named the aggressor, was eventually vindicated in the matter, and Brukner’s only penalty was that publicity of the incident helped him lose his tilt at the federal seat of Dawson.

But the locally popular Moscow Mike has always been up for a stoush – mostly verbal nowadays – but was unable to adequately explain some highly questionable allocation of disaster relief money discovered by the incoming council after he was when defeated in the 2012 mayoral election.

But many in the Burdekin electorate still readily identify with a left-wing beer bellied bully and loudmouth, so former Senior Sergeant Last may be well advised to carry his old cuffs with him for any one-on-one debates. But Bentley reckons he may be out of his weight division.

Boxers fin small

Secret Mullet Business

Her malice and long memory has had Townsville businesses on the run for years, but finally, it seems, the worm is turning on Mayor Jenny Hill. This story in the Weekend Bulletin is just the tip of the iceberg.

Screen Shot 2020-08-22 at 12.23.31 pm

The ‘Pie is reliably told that investment is stalling across the city, with businesses looking elsewhere for what they believe are fairer opportunities. The ‘Pie understands the likes of Stockland, Dexus (Willows) Parkside (Tapiolas family) QIC (Domain) and, most famously, Qantas, are all baulking at the sudden and arbitrary high handedness of an unpredictable covert council (read mayor). Stockland have sold their Northshore shopping Centre and it settled two weeks ago. More money is fleeing the city, according to Magpie contacts.

Two years ago, a leading business identity of unimpeachable honesty told The Magpie that Laurence Lancini told a meeting they were in that he would no longer invest in Townsville as long as Mrs Hill was mayor. The informant quoted LL as saying it was impossible to do business with her. And he’s been as good as his word.

Mayor Mullet’s is ‘playing to the gallery’ – her core constituents – when she says there are minimum rates rises … but businesses getting slugged from 37 to 45 per cent increases smacks of a council in desperate financial trouble. Especially when such changes … which equates to a massive loss of job opportunities … were done in secret and without consultation.

Have a skim through this, it’s a report done three years ago, entitled The Transformation of Townsville.  It seems to have been largely ignored by both local media and certainly the mayor, one assumes. Not surprising, since it publishes the universally scathing opinions of scores of local interviews. And it is unflinching in its honest appraisal, because it wasn’t done by some local or specially imported mates of the mayor, it was done by an independent Sydney group of professionals that was accidentally contracted by the council to undertake.

All this finds The Bulletin itself in a tricky position, akin to the confused Irishman staring at two shovels leaning against a wall after his boss had told him to take his pick.

On the one hand, The Astonisher stays far enough up the council’s orifice to keep the TCC space-filling frippery and local government advertising turning over.

On the other hand, they are now placed in a position where their ‘fearless, tough-questioning investigative reporters’ should drill down deep into this issue to appease their real money spinners, the big businesses of shopping centres, homemaker centres and the like who have been hit with madam mayor’s clumsy and self-defeating budget juggling. It’s a major dilemma for the newspaper now known locally as ‘The Townsville Daily Harvey Norman.’ And like the retailer, the paper also offers no interest for 60 months … if ever.

Pandemic Politics Now A Pantomime

This latest over-reach in the shadow flinching at the mildest presence of corona virus is unsustainable in logic or necessity.

Screen Shot 2020-08-22 at 2.51.33 pm

By any measure, that is bullshit. Just how can there be any proof of this alarming scare tactic? Interestingly, no ‘flu stats, either. The ‘Pie is not knocking testing at all, but this sort of emotional coercion is not balanced leadership. it’s electoral panic, and that’s what happens when a government goes into policy lockdown for the past four years (out-of-control juvenile crime in Townsville, anyone?)

And this nonsense claim from a doctor who turned sociologist/psychologist and deemed that people watching an Anzac flypast of vintage fighters would get an uncontrollable urge to go (gasp!) for a drive, a woman who determined that it was OK for 80 people to attend an indigenous funeral on cultural grounds (when was that taught in pandemic medicine?), and later, that it was OK for a mass protest on an unrelated but politically sensitive issue (BLM) BUT it was not safe or culturally appropriate for diggers to march on Anzac Day. So seems a medical doctor gets to grade cultures apparently.

And today we have the matter of the 2-year-old Queensland girl who had to be flown to Sydney to have heart surgery, but she and her parents have been knocked back TWICE for an exemption from hotel quarantine if their return, and will not be allowed to spent their isolation in their home. This despite doctors saying HOTEL QUARANTINE WOULD REPRESENT A THREAT OF THE CHILD ACTUALLY CONTRACTING THE VIRUS, BUT WOULD LIKELY CAUSE PSYCHOLOGICAL DAMAGE FOR YEARS FOR A CHILD ALREADY RECOVERING FROM THE TRAUMA OF MAJOR SURGERY.

Both Palaszczuk and Minister Stephen Miles refused to answer questions on the matter, presumably because the child was not a celebrity, actor or a sportsman. Bet you any money an egg-on-face backdown is only hours away.

But When History Judges, Guess who’ll Cop The Pineapple?

Of greater concern around this bend in the river was when Dr Young’s overall credibility was shot to pieces, by not allowing local businesses in covid-free Townsville to resume recovery weeks ago. Instead, we were forced to inexplicably wait for the south-east to reach safe levels first. But when history judges, Anna Palaszczuk has a ready-made fall guy, a willing scapegoat. ‘All decisions I make are based on the medical advice of Dr. Young,’ she weaselled a couple days ago.

OK, so we’re all in new territory here, but it appears it is Dr Young and her political masters who are in panic, clearly for political reasons. Get ready to assume the position to receive the pineapple, Doc, especially if boss Anna loses the election.

Gleeson’s Pol Pot Solution

Gleeson on bussingScreen Shot 2020-08-16 at 8.39.52 am

Failed newspaper editor and now a squeaky member of Sky TV’s right wing sewing circle, Peter Typo Gleeson has again proved he comes from the shallow end of the gene pool. In the Sunday Mail (is that still going?) last week, Gleeson offered his Pol Pot solution to the ‘layabouts’ getting the Jobkeeper allowance during the pandemic. In an outburst that hints of the mind as hyperactive as an over caffeinated toddler who doesn’t grasp the theory of unintended consequences, he wrote:

So here’s the solution. Young, healthy Australians who live with their parents and receive a taxpayer-funded JobSeeker allowance should be conscripted to work on farms. They should be tested for COVID-19 and, once cleared, pack their bags and be sent via bus to fruit and vegetable picking areas for three months. They would learn new skills, earn good money and be a benefit to the country, rather than a drain on welfare.

They may even make some new friends. Imagine that.

Well, Pete, let’s imagine a few other things.

Just how would such a jack-booted measure be enforced and then policed? By all those idle layabout coppers, who have nothing to do but stand around picking their teeth and buffing their fingernails? And what penalties do you propose, to impose on those who are on welfare to start with?

And have you bothered to ask the farmers themselves how they feel about being lumped with a workforce filled with simmering resentment, including many of whom would be both revengeful and disruptive and possibly consider sabotage in retaliation (pins in your pears, anyone? Pebbles in your passionfruit?)

Well, Typo, looking forward to your next column. You might even make sense. Imagine that.

When The Magpie Started To Lose Faith

Screen Shot 2020-08-22 at 11.12.35 am


There’s a suitable headline for a disgracefully ignorant story in the Daily Astonisher this week.

Screen Shot 2020-08-17 at 8.16.43 am

The effects of COVID overkill are now evident with people becoming weary of all the desperate side bar stories (‘Are hairdressers at risk? #whogivesafuck) outside the crucial recording of cases, deaths and border laws.

But presenting unchallenged opinion as fact is what the Bulletin has done.

Reporter Sam ‘Flog It To Death’ Flanagan tapped out an entire story based on an ill-informed and irresponsible comment regarding the location of a covid testing station at the Rockpool. And all from someone who called the paper to broadcast their complaint to the world but, brave soul, declined to be identified any more than being ‘a resident’.

The ‘resident’ wanted the testing station moved to somewhere not so prominent (or accessible) as the Rockpool, because it was attracting those ‘who could infect others’. Key quote:

“If they are getting tested that means they have symptoms, so they should be wearing a mask.”

That is just so ignorantly wrong and an invitation to panic that the reporter would soon put things to rights, eh? ‘fraid not, Sam didn’t just let that grossly insulting and plain wrong statement go unchallenged, he made it the basis for his whole streak of space filler drivel.

FYI, mate, simple statistics (always a challenge at the Bulletin) clearly show that people getting tested do not necessarily have any symptoms at all, indeed the majority don’t, they do it as a responsible social safeguard. If those being tested all had symptoms, we’d have 10 to 20 times more cases on record. And our ‘resident’ suggests testing station should be more difficult to get to, and be tucked away in parks or some such, so as not to disturb his wife’s morning walk. Brilliant!

What they say about Townsville certainly applies to the Bulletin … it’s not the heat, it’s the stupidity.

Some Things Never Change … Including Stories About Changing Things

The tediously predictable perennial space filler about changing Townsville’s name was trotted out again during the week, and a lot of unfunny fun was had with it. Bad timing though, but luckily, the possible suggestion of Paedo Paradise didn’t feature. From comments:

The Magpie
4,628 approved
email hidden; JavaScript is required
Submitted on 2020/08/19 at 4:35 pmWonder how long it will take the Bulletin to catch up to this wonderful endorsement of Townsville? And how they will spin it for our disgraceful Labor government?IMG_6185

Thanks again, Anna.

But If Ever A Place Needed A Name Change

Note the town on the billboard. And Crystal Meth ….?

effing name 58F3C618565C4A4ABCE2598C7358DC47

They Said It

Notable sayings of the week.

‘She is a bit of a dead loss; she doesn’t contribute to anything, she just flaps around and doesn’t take her medication when she has been diagnosed.’

Magistrate Ross Mack about a woman thief and fraudster, in a case that raised eyebrows for more than His Honour’s colourful summation. The prosecutor had called for a 6 month jail term, but the woman’s own defence lawyer Maria Christian inexplicably suggested a head sentence of two years, which prompted a clearly surprised Magistrate Mack to say a very uncourtly ‘Crikey!’ in disbelief. He told Ms Christian to ‘get real’, and sentenced the woman to 100 hours community service.

Gawd, The ‘Pie misses court.

“You can’t fake your way through this job.’

Michelle Obama nailing Donald Trump in a simple sentence during her address to the Democratic National convention. Trouble is, he has so far.

The Magpie has a brief bright moment during the week, but it was quickly dashed.

The Magpie
email hidden; JavaScript is required
Submitted on 2020/08/19 at 4:58 pmYeSSSSSSS!
Oh, wait … wrong country. Damn.Screen Shot 2020-08-19 at 4.29.51 pm

Headline of the Week

Clever.KamelotScreen Shot 2020-08-18 at 1.31.02 pm

Maureen Dowd column – NYT

And what Biden and Harris dare to dream is rapidly becoming the Trumpanzee’s nightmare, even to the extent of sabotaging US mail to avoid mail-in voting, and briefly trotting out his ‘birthing’ smear questioning Kamala Harris’s eligibity to run for Veep. The week in Pandemica.

Screen Shot 2020-08-18 at 5.02.29 pm 242542_rgb_768 Screen Shot 2020-08-13 at 5.37.18 pm image001 Screen Shot 2020-08-13 at 5.36.55 pm jd081820dapr 242469_rgb_768 Screen Shot 2020-08-19 at 4.42.51 pm Screen Shot 2020-08-19 at 4.27.52 pm 242513_rgb_768 242515_rgb_768 081820postofficer 081720congressvacr 242418_rgb_768 sb081920dapr sbr081920dapr image002 wpnan200821 20200819edbbc-a

Finally, Hangin’ Out In New York’s Vogue Magazine

Tut Tut Tut … err, sorry, that should be Tat Tat Tat ….
Early Christmas gift idea for some prominent Aussies … maybe Clive Palmer, Greg Hallam, Mike Brunker, the entire Broncos team?

Screen Shot 2020-08-19 at 4.19.44 pm

Now finish your breakfast.


The issues never end, and comments on same run 24/7, submit your thoughts, whimsical or serious, lot of fun to be had. And donations are always welcome and always needed, so if you can help keep the Magpie blog aloft, the appropriate button is below.

The Magpie's Nest is now more than five years old, and remains an independent alternative voice for Townsville. The weekly warble is a labour of love and takes a lot of time to put together. So if you like your weekly load of old cobblers, you can help keep it aloft with a donation, or even a regular voluntary subscription. Paypal is at the ready, it's as easy as ... well, easy as pie. Limited advertising space is also available.


  1. spooka says:

    Major shopping Centres are owned and in particular, managed by some of the biggest corporate criminals in the country, the industry is infested with morally corrupt grubs. Rest assured, any increase will be passed on to tenants. they will be the poor bastards that the Mullet is stinging.

    • The Magpie says:

      Yes, agreed, and the tenants will pass it on to whom … customers and staff, of course.

      • spooka says:

        Dito matte

      • The (Barely) Civil Engineer says:

        Regardless of who owns the centres, the people of Townsville will again shoulder this load, with the benefits again poured onto the foul sands of the dead “heart” of this city.

        Hill is content to strangle this city to death and most are too intellectually lazy to even see that the lofty height from which she rules is just a doona filled with with rotting project ideas, political cronyism, and businesses which have failed due to her inept leadership.

        Where is Frothy repudiating the story on the rate rises? Only last week he was gushing that we were a low rate city with not rises – the lying little cup of slop.

    • Mike Douglas says:

      Spooka , Morally Corrupt Grubs , biggest criminals in the Country own and manage shopping centres ? . So you are aware investors / shareholders in the local shopping centres are over 25 industry superfunds including Sunsuper , Cbus, Unisuper , Hostplus . Individuals Self Managed Super Funds , family companies . Not including local contractors used by the centres / thousands of jobs by tenants and millions $ of rates to the City . Just bringing some balance and information to this discussion .

      • The Magpie says:

        Don’t get too fussed, Mike, Spooka’s ill-informed and shallow analysis is symptomatic in microcosm of what ails this city … rusted on 1950s Labor and union class tropes. At least we can identify the canker that infects the body politic.

        • spooka says:

          Sorry pie, I’m a diehard conservative. Worked in the industry for a while, left it in disgust, I will bow out as I should never expected the public to understand how this industry operates, shame our mutual old mate sludge was not around, he knew very well they operate.

      • spooka says:

        More than aware of who the true owners of these centers are, in the main Australian workers. If you have any experience with the super fund managers claiming ownership on behalf of the superannuants or their hired thugs (center managers ) you would know well they are what I have called them. They are protected by the ACCC who come under the umbrella of the treasury and instructed by the treasury to ensure the protection of those billions of superfunds invested in these centers nationally. A criminal industry with government protection.

    • CEO of Crap says:

      In Castletown last week I noticed a big sign on the Muffin Break cafe along the lines of ‘closing down, this was NOT our decision’.

  2. Cantankerous but happy says:

    I have maintained for years that Townsville will never become a thriving place again whilst Jenny Hill is Mayor. This latest anti business rates rise is proof she is just an ignorant dickhead with zero economic understanding at all. The thing people don’t understand is the bogans who vote her in actually pay in the long run, whether it be higher prices for products, fewer jobs as businesses cut back staff or business people just closing up and pissing off down south.

  3. Titus says:

    Great post this week Pie. Let’s see how true the COVID bullshit really is with the mong Chief Health Officer saying yesterday;

    “From today, gatherings in homes and in public have been restricted to 10 people in the following local government areas: City of Brisbane, City of Ipswich, Logan City, Scenic Rim Region, Somerset Region, Lockyer Valley Region, Moreton Bay Region, Redlands City.

    Gatherings across the rest of Queensland outside those areas have been limited to 30 people.”

    So if public gathering are restricted to 30 people in Townsville does that mean no footy, no v8’s, no fights? Or more double standards. Can’t wait for Shine Lawyers to start their class action next year against governments who ruined business, increased financial loss, and contributed to suicides because they don’t know how to take responsible proportional action. FFS we went into this to flatten curve to match cases to the capacity of the health systems. How fucked is the health system if we can’ t handle 50 COVID case in Queensland.

    • The Magpie says:

      Your analysis is looking increasing precise.

    • FUBAR says:

      ive always thought about why Australia hasnt had such a high death rate from covid. I can only asume because we are a healthy country with a good health system and vaccination on other diseases in the past have made the population stronger. I would ad NZ in that too. The sheer panic that happens when one person from out of nowhere gets it is astonishing (TB). I spoke to a motel owner the other day and his reaction about a covid positive being in his place was, ” im not worried about the health implications rather the bad press and loss of business ” Titis is right how come we cant treat that amount of people in our hospitals and allow the rest of us to live normally. I dont mind restrictions but this is just an election campaign strategy now considering what just happened in NT elections.

      • The Magpie says:

        When eventually the statistics are analysed, and broken down into number of positive tests, number of hospitalisations, number NOT requiring hospitalisation, number of deaths by demographics (which would allow strong targeting of vulnerable sectors) , and whether those who have had the virus are immune (haven’t seen a yay or nay on that lately, but that is a vital clue to the strangely repudiated ‘herd immunity’ theory), and the economic devastation that continued long after it should have ceased, history will have a very interesting back view on all this. Restrictions were of course right and necessary to start with, but as identification of targeted areas emerged and were ignored for base political reasons, the heroes and villains file will make interesting reading.

        And no matter what other verdict may emerge about Dan Andrews (and The ‘Pie is no fan of his politics) he has been admirable in this matter, facing up day after day and not once wimping out or sugar coating his information with political syrup. He looks worn out, as one would expect, and The ‘Pie for one has great respect for that aspect of his performance …. so unlike an Australian politician, especially those in Canberra who are constantly MIA when things look tricky.

        • Titus says:

          Dan Andrews is coping karma from when he bagged out NSW for Ruby Princess in May, now look at Victoria, blames meat workers only to find out it was a state meat inspector doing the spreading. Same with hotel quarantine he fucked a simple process by ignoring the federal CHO and played politics with security companies to satisfy minorities.

          The states could not shut down borders without the federal government support like job keeper.

          • The Magpie says:

            Still, he’s not ducking his responsibility to keep people informed, or go missing. Don’t dispute your points, but The ‘Pie’s point was, no matter what, he’s front and centre, not sending out ‘spokespeople’.

          • Grumpy says:

            Monies on him being gone within the 12-month.

          • Bartel says:

            I see everyone’s mate Harpic is giving the astonisher a touch up on Facebook saying we didn’t deliver $700m of projects it should be $1billion. For fuck sake Harpic realise the paper is trying to help you and all you do is sook.

            Firstly when did doing your job become something to crow about. Governments are supposed to repair and replace fucked assets. The only reason we need to build new roads with tax payers money is because councils don’t get developers to contribute enough to infrastructure.

            What a pity politician can’t run media events for catching criminals maybe that is our only chance of getting grubs and pedoes off the streets of Townsville.

          • The Magpie says:

            Don’t understand your opening line. Clue, please.

          • Lofty says:

            Harper is a needy pest, and really starting to piss people off in the party. One more over the top request and he will be cut loose. He needs to realize its about the party not him.

          • L Berry says:

            Lofty, I would say that most requests come from the missus. Word is that she she is an abrasive “Do you know who I am?” character who still holds the Cowboys VIP lounge buffet record for the number of Moreton Bay Bugs on one plate.

        • Kenny Kennett says:

          It’s all part of Chairman Dan’s strategic plan to distract from his plan to sell off Victoria with his Belt & Road Communist partnership. Remember Chairman Dan is co-Chair of this global project so he’ll be well remunerated for his loyalty. If all goes to plan, Australia’s ‘Red Centre’ will have a knew meaning.

          • The Magpie says:

            Well, if your opening bit of flummery was correct, Andrews is a genius and a dunce all at once. How did he organise the corona virus as part of a strategic plan?

          • Dave of Kelso says:

            By employing uneducated, untrained, uninterested, undisciplined, unsupervised civilian hotel quranteen security guards, after rejecting support from the ADF. That’s how.

  4. The patient patient says:

    I had an appointment during the week as an outpatient on the second floor of the Townsville University Hospital. In the queue to register at the counter I kept the required distance as per the little notices on the floor 1.5 metres apart.

    After getting checked in I walked into the waiting room to discover that the approximately 60 seats in room were jam packed with no seats available and no social distancing at all…….. the person next to you on the left was a few centimetres away from you the same on the right hand side with elbows sometimes touching like occupying the centre seat of three in an aircraft.

    • I’ll be plucked says:

      AND Patient, what did you do next? Point it out to hospital staff, or sat down and sucked it up? Interested in your response…

  5. One legged tap dancer says:

    Speaking of election campaigns, how does Anna Alphabet get away with running government funded tv ads spruiking how much money the Labor Government has spent in Townsville?
    In days of old the local newspaper would be calling out the State Government for this blatant misuse of power but nowadays, with advertising revenue ruling the roost and the promise of a coming Labor funded election blitz, the Townsville Bulletin and Channel 7 turn a blind eye and foster corruption.
    They’ve been doing it for so long now, with both the State Government and the Townsville City Council, that its considered normal.

  6. Dr Fist-me says:

    They are already seeing some emerging patterns, the hardest his group’s – obese, diabetic and those with auto immune diseases, the elderly, and those with blood disorders (hence the heavy impact on Greeks and Italians). What WILL become evident eventually is that the decision to destroy the global economy and push us into a global depression due to the LONG TERM closing of the economy will have a devestating impact for the next half a century. It’s alteady happening now. Irreparable damage caused by idiotic, inept fuckwit Politicians of whom they may think that they are smart and fantastic leaders but they are in reality fucking idiots.

    The long term financial disaster, suicide and mental health impacts and not to mention all the people with undiagnosed cancers and other illnesses that will likely kill them or cause added pressure on the health system because they haven’t been able to get diagnosed due to shutdown policies will be savage.

    Quite simply, the true outcome of the shutdown is yet to be felt but it’s coming. Is COVID real? Of course. But have the right measures been put in place to deal with it in the most effective way? No. This will go down as the biggest fuckup mankind has ever seen.

    • The Magpie says:

      What, worse than Christianity and Islam? Ways to go, you’d reckon, by a few hundred million.

      • I’ll be plucked says:

        ‘Speaking‘ of feeling something Fist, was there an earth tremor in Townsville about 20 minutes, or so ago? Chair I was lounging in ‘rocked’! Either that, or the foundations of the house are grumbling!!

        • The Magpie says:

          Vindaloo and a VB for lunch?

        • The Magpie says:

          The ‘Pie was alerted to your mindset with you’re choice of name, Dr Fist-me, but you are sadly mistaken if you think this blog entertains the sort of comment just deleted. Not funny, not clever, not relevant, and juvenile in the extreme. One suspects you are a high school boy who has just discovered he is gay. Now you just have to get the pride bit.Try Facebook with that crap.

          • Old Tradesman says:

            Wait until Kate Jones gets us the International Gay Games, plus the Olympic Games. I Da Faggot shall return like an immortalised Douglas McArthur.

          • Dr Fist-me says:

            Settle down mate. What’s your issue?

          • The Magpie says:

            Just explained it, not going to doit twice.

          • Dr Fist-me says:

            You’ve got no sense of humour and your hypocrisy is incredible considering risqué and rude humour you have used. That said, it’s your blog and you make the rules. You’ve received your last financial donation from me and I shall toddle off to other pastures. No hard feelings. Cheers

          • The Magpie says:

            Thank you for your past support.

          • Last Drinks says:

            First rule of Pie Club is make generous and regular donations, it encourages him. He wisely still censors some of my best work. However Fist-Me, puerile names are just not on. There are ladies on here. Best to stick to old Boomer names like Grumpy. Also, welcome back N.M.D. I missed you.

          • The Magpie says:

            The Magpie also finds it necessary to edit certain posts … heh heh heh.

          • Last Drinks says:

            Foiled again Magpie. You are an evil old bustard, not a magpie at all.

          • The Magpie says:

            hahaha – wheeze – snurffle … now that is clever.

            (For readers info, LD is referring to his original comment yesterday, which was impishly edited by the ‘old bustard’ before publication.)

          • I’ll be plucked says:

            Yeah, I’m offended LD . NOT!

          • I’ll be plucked says:

            Well, well Fist you wallflower! Tough it out and keep going, or pluck off and don’t ever come back. These are, I believe, YOUR choices. Over to you.

        • Bentley says:

          Anyone else feel the tremor? I honestly felt something otherwise difficult to explain and mentioned it to the others nearby. They made light of it and so after the mirth subsided the matter was forgotten until now.

      • Just Say'n says:

        You’re exactly right Pie,

        As I often say – thank Christ I’m an atheist

        Belated birthday wishes. Hope you hang in for a while yet

        • The Magpie says:

          Christ, you make it sound like the old bird is moulting fast. Still full of beans, and unless the go-fund-me for a hitman gets enough dough, hope to be around for some time.

    • Not the ECQ says:

      “But have the right measures been put in place to deal with it in the most effective way? No.”

      Given that about 200 nations have each chosen their own “right measures” and that Australia is doing way better than most, do you have any concrete suggestions about where we should have gone or where to next?

      • Dr Fist-me says:

        Simple; mild restrictions for a short space of time in areas where hotspots broke out. That’s hould have been done. Otherwise let the damn virus run it’s course until a vaccine is found or people build up enough antibodies. Deaths are inevitable and more people still die from influenza ‘a’ and ‘b’ each year, globally.

        But I’m sure ECQ that with the level of love, faith and trust that you have in your beloved Labor party you would be expecting them to find a cure.

        • Ian Taylor says:

          Do you think Anna is keeping the border closed on purpose. PM can’t come over the border to help the LNP in the election campaign

    • NQ Gal says:

      Dr Dr – why are you picking on Greeks and Italians for being obese and diabetic? A trip to the shops will show fatties in all colours

      • Dr Fist-me says:

        NQ Gal, the countries of Greece and Italy got smashed hard with COVID. Some googling will explain the blood disorder that many from Europe and some of Asia have. It makes them vulnerable. Also the obese, diabetic and elderly are succeptable. I’m not picking it being racist. Examine the data, it’s out there.

        • The Magpie says:

          Like to see any links to that blood disorder claim. Shouldn’t be hard, sent it in.

        • CEO of Crap says:

          Dr Fist-me, I’m German heritage. Is it true my blood was scientific engineered to be ‘superior’?

          • The Magpie says:

            Don’t be waiting for an answer, Dr F M says he is sulking off ‘cos he was miffed that The ‘Pie rejected his schoolboy attempts at scatalogical and biological humour. His serious stuff was interesting, though. Very sooky.

        • Rowdy says:

          Italy – Total cases 259,354. Total deaths 35,347.
          Greece – Total cases 8,664. Total deaths 242.
          Australia – Total cases 24,915. Total deaths 517.

          Italy got hit hard. Greece has not been hit hard.

          • The Magpie says:

            OK, let us acceot the Greek stats originally supplied by one of the world’s most chaotic bureaucratic and political nations. And the lesson? Lay off the Chianti and VB, and stick to retsina … even covid can’t survive that.

          • Mike Shearer says:

            The raw figures need the context of (a) total populations, and (b) population density. In any case, there are too many relevant variables for comparisons of number of cases and deaths to mean much. For instance, what comorbidities existed in those who died? Locally, it’d be far more sensible to compare statistics between capital cities than between states – but even those comparisons would need lots of qualifications.

  7. Pat Coleman says:

    Personally , I take this covid business seriously . I cant go to Townsville Hospital until they frogmarch Mooney from the grounds. We dont get along.

    • Old Tradesman says:

      So Pat why were you at the BLM protest at the strand a while back?

      • Pat Coleman says:

        One of my tasks was to stand in the path to monitor the LNP people coming past to check the numbers.

        You can ask the plain clothed goons trying not to look like coppers in the crowd.

        I’m pretty shitty you crooks are supporting footy , boxing and fucking v8 crowds.

  8. I’ll be plucked says:

    Is Dan Andrews a candidate for the next Ambassador to Beijing? Eminently qualified, apparently…? Belt Rd anyone?

  9. F14daze says:

    I thought, Gleeso was more left inclined while at the Astonishment… He still looks sloppy. I recall his bum arsed pants and daggy ill fitting pink shirts..

  10. Cappuccino in hand says:

    Border closures are more popular than fixing crime or the economy. Go figure.
    Nanna will get back in. She might get bruised a little in TSV and CNS. But SE QLD will bring her another 4 years.
    NT election same, same. Close the borders and you can do anything you like and get back in.
    Doona was also a BIG Covad winner. Didn’t have to do anything to cruise back in.
    Whinging about this won’t get you anywhere.

  11. Tinfoil Pete says:

    Supposedly an asteroid may hit the earth the day before the USSA November 2 election. Could we be so lucky?

    Has anyone fact checked this with Peter Newey?


  12. Confused says:

    I see on the news that outside Brisbane a maximum of 30 people can now attend public gatherings.
    So why are they allowing who knows how many to attend two weekends of V8s, 6000 at Cowboys games, and 16,000 for the overhyped Horn fight?
    Jenny Hill is taking all the credit for bringing the V8s and the fight to Townsville but I doubt she will take the blame if Townsville ends up with a covid-19 outbreak after these totally unnecessary mass gatherings.

    • The Magpie says:

      Calm down, V8s and boxing are ‘cultural events’ and are therefore exempt – it’ll be OK just so long as they’re not Anzacs marching to honour a country they helped ensure could make up these rules.

  13. The (Barely) Civil Engineer says:

    Wow – was it a full moon yesterday or did the earth tremor set off all the tin hats?

    When I checked in yesterday morning this site was a model of decorum and serious discussion. This morning it looks like a troop of monkeys had a spirited poop fight!

    I’ll need more than coffee to wade through this.

    • The Magpie says:

      Yes, The ‘Pie was worried that standards were slipping yesterday, but is pleased to see, as you point out, things have returned to normal today.

  14. Not the ECQ says:

    Mr Magpie, about three weeks ago during the stoush about Haughton Stage 2 and GST allocation, the Q government said that they would reject the $195m from the Commonwealth and fund Stage 2 themselves. But it seemed that the Commonwealth money would still come to Townsville. The ABC reported:

    “Mr Thompson has confirmed the $195 million already allocated by the Commonwealth would stay in Townsville, but the State Government already has eyes on where it should be spent.

    “We’ll be calling on the Federal Government to find $195 million to fund flood recovery projects which are exempt from GST calculations in the future,” Mr Dick said.

    Mr Thompson said he would discuss the funds with stakeholders.”

    Does anyone understand what this actually means? Will the Commonwealth just dump the money on some other local (read Jenny Hill) project, would it still affect Queensland’s GST allocation down the track or will the Deb20 campaign be gifted some pork barrel for a potential new Co-Ordinator General to spend – if Deb can only remember why she wants to get a new one?

    • The Magpie says:

      You’re missing a salient point in your Labor campaign message, ECQ … as The ‘Pie has mentioned before, he is yet to see any definitive proof that the federal money will be available for Townsville projects, no matter from whom they emanate. Phillip Thompson is doing a sterling job of talking the talk, but as is usual with all politicians, but when it comes to walking the walk, he will be in low gear on a slow-speed walking frame on this one.

      But your last comment about The Freckle is just stupid gum flapping campaign junk. She’s doing herself enough damage without Shorten-like non-zingers from the likes of you.

      • Not the ECQ says:

        Mr M, one of the centre pieces of the Deb20 (now Deb2020.com.au) campaign is, or was pre-Covid, the New Bradfield Scheme which proposes to send the waters of NQ inland to CQ and onwards to the Murray-Darling. It would be terrible if a big packet of Commonwealth dough was re-allocated to such an eye watering fantasy scheme. Deb wants to fund CSIRO to the tune of $20m to “fine tune” the proposal and then sink $15 billion, raised from fantasy Galilee Basin coal royalties over ten years, to build the thing. Hanrahan might have been onto something.

        • The Magpie says:

          Or perhaps The Freckle is just going after the vote of consultant and other specialists in pre-feasibility feasibility preliminarty interim reports vote … when they see what’s on offer, they’ll vote as a bloc, and Christ, there’s enough of these bullshit artists to push her over the line.

        • Steve, Belgian Gardens says:

          Like the proposed study for a coal power station in Collinsville, the B.S. study will return a big thumbs down and the LNP know it. Breathtakingly cyclical peddling of false hope.

          • The Magpie says:

            Hey, that last line would be a good slogan for a certain newspaper we know … sure beats ‘We’re For You.’

          • Old Tradesman says:

            Hello Steve, how much money is The Brisbane Cross River Rail Project going to earn the Queensland economy, it’s only going to cost the Queensland taxpayer $16Billion, you need to go and join the Treasury with Cameron Dick.

          • Steve, Belgian Gardens says:

            Old Tradesman – odd question, also where did you get the $16 billion figure from?

          • Steve, Belgian Gardens says:

            Old Tradesman – this was coincidentally answered in today’s paper: Cross River Rail will return $1.21 for every dollar spent, so not a bad return, but peanuts compared to the $4.54 per $1 return on CopperString.

      • Garry says:

        The money can’t go to flood recovery because the TCC has stuffed up the NDRRA funding applications, they did not follow process and played too many game.

        Good to see Phil saying tax payers money shouldn’t go to private companies, this kid is learning fast. Also interesting to see the CEO of Magnis got terminated last week.

        • Not the ECQ says:

          But Garry, who else can taxpayers money go to? When ‘government’ spends a squillion on new roads and bridges nearly all the money goes to the “private companies” that actually build the things. What did you have in mind?

  15. Russell says:

    Just want to say a big “thank you” to Dr Fist-me for the links provided. There is no way I would ever have found them without his/her help. Assuming the details there-in are true, this goes a VERY LONG way towards explaining the existence of “Covid clusters”, here and all over the world actually – including the USA.

  16. Dutch Reverend says:

    Broncos look like they are going to piff Anthony Siebold and will be looking for a replacement for the CEO. What’s the bet Greeny & Lozza are going to be the front runners.

  17. NMD says:

    Hi everybody, I’m back! Did you miss me???

  18. Alahazbin says:

    I’ve heard ( nothing confirmed though) that there is so much water in BFD reserves that SunWater can’t allocate it all and that is why the government has gone cold on doing stage2. The be all and end all to me with BFD2 is that the hydro power is the main attraction. Water allocation a second priority.

  19. The Magpie says:


    They really don’t think these things through at the Townsville Bulletin, do they?

    Reporter Shayla Bulloch, although she probably doesn’t even know it, has made the stunning and unsupported accusation of widespread corruption by a number of unnamed police officers, albeit dressing up their illegality and abuse of power as some sort of noble Robin Hood action for the ‘little man’.

    There is so much wrong with this story, it is hard to know where to start.

    First anonymity: the very fact that the officer quoted didn’t want to be named clearly proves he knows what he and the others he says act likewise is wrong, and is a form of corruption – not for personal benefit (so he says) but by using police powers for political activism, as evidenced in the very first paragraph:
    A TOWNSVILLE police officer says police have stopped handing out “obscenely expensive” new fines as they are copping excessive abuse, saying they won’t pay for the government’s bad decision. The officer, who does not want to be named, said he was not the only officer in the region who refused to slap motorists with a $1000 fine for using their mobile phone while driving.
    This is gob-smacking stuff in more ways than one, and because of the anonymity, The ‘Pie is entitled to believe this is actually made-up, beat-up bullshit. How can the reporter expect to be believed unless a name is put to the comments? Comments which quickly morph into political activism, using hot button words like ‘choose’ (you don’t have a choice, according to Mr Fitzgerald, mate), ‘hypocritical’ (wow!) and unwarranted opinions as in the following:
    The police officer said the move to raise the single penalty was hypocritical, considering no other penalties were raised, and that drug and drink-driving was still a huge issue. He confessed officers had stopped using their usual “eagle-eyed” approach and chose to seek out other offences instead. “The fines are completely out of proportion with every other offence,” he said.“We are turning a blind eye to it because we still have to justify the fine to ourselves.”
    WHAT??? NO YOU DO NOT HAVE TO, OR HAVE THE RIGHT TO, JUSTIFY THE AMOUNT OF THE FINES ‘TO OURSELVES’. What utter unvarnished bullshit. The ‘Pie would love to be in court the day some miscreant tells the judge ‘Your Honour, I will not be paying this fine or serving your jail sentence, because I cannot justify it to myself.’
    Then there’s relevance in the reasoning:
    The police officer said they could not be expected to slap a driver with the huge fine when infringements for other serious offences were much less expensive. “Seatbelts are about $400, a speeding ticket is between $200 and $300,” he said. “If you have three or four cannabis plants in your back yard you won’t get a $1000 fine.”

    WTF, of course you won’t … listen mate, if you really exist – having three or four a ‘pot’ plants in your backyard won’t in itself kill or maim other road users. This is the sort of conflation we’re used to hearing from Peter Dutton – who is, of course, an ex-copper.
    Finally, journalistic protection of sources.
    Ms Bulloch and Iditor Craig Warhurst could have a few sleepless nights ahead (separately, one assumes) if the walloper hierarchy decide they want to know who gave her this interview. She can’t claim any sort of whistleblower sainthood, because her source is not blowing any whistle, more a trumpet, clearly admitting to corrupt behaviour, the sort that could quickly – if it hasn’t ready – devolve into ‘slip us a couple hundred, and I’ll drop the charge to a $500 fine’.
    Ms Bulloch, if you had a one-on-one interview with a fugitive criminal, you would need to give the authorities all information about him or quite reasonably face charges of aiding and abetting, and being an accessory after the fact.
    And a heads up, ducky, ask the Id to call Ferdy, the Bulletin’s excellent legal adviser … the big boys in blue are very likely to want a chat to you, for two reasons. 1. they take a dim view of their troops making up the rules for themselves, and 2. they will be getting their own arses kicked by a government with every right to ask why laws made by elected representatives are suddenly trumped by some political wallopers in Townsville.

  20. Cupcake Stewart says:

    I want my rank back. I have brought the Horn fight to Townsville, I brought you the stadium and I am bringing you the Cowboys high performance facility – ME! And, what about the Ogden St. bus exchange, that was me too!

    I deserve another 4 years because of the above at the election in October, and yes, I deserve my rank of Captain back.

    • I’ll be plucked says:

      Cupcake Stewart, you deserve to be run outta town. Hang your head in shame for doing the bidding of your Brisbane masters over two-terms, at the expense of our community and the electorate of Townsville!

      Bring on October.

  21. Dr Fist-me says:

    Plucka, you arrogant, angry opinionated git! I think I like you mate! I might stay and play for a bit longer in the Magpie’s backyard. Tweet tweet

  22. Help Wanted. says:

    Smart Readers of the Pie Blog can you help me out?

    Pollies are saying we need to stop COVID to have a strong economy.

    If we stop the economy where do we get the money to stop COVID?

    Does it all go on the credit card?

    Particularly when Dictator Dan is saying he wants Lock Down powers for another 12 months.

  23. Cantankerous but happy says:

    Pathetic headline in the Townsville Bulletin today sums up everything wrong with this place, “ Nth Qld soars past city airports” , just fucking pitiful. Why the fuck would anyone want to take any sort of satisfaction in this fails me, no one did anything great for this to occur, it just happened by default on the back of a lot of the misery from some poor struggling bastards being locked down and not being allowed to go anywhere. We have some pathetic shallow people in this town.

    • The Magpie says:

      Sincere thanks from The Magpie, your comment saves him the trouble. The Townsville Bulletin is the wizened moron behind the curtain in the Wizard of Oz.

  24. The Devil Wears A Doona says:

    Hey Mullet and the hapless Cupcake Stewart, HOW MUCH MONEY HAVE YOU STUMPED UP FOR THR HORN FIGHT AND THE V8’S??!

  25. I’ll be plucked says:

    Two further victims of the virus: KFC are having to ‘cover up‘/change their slogan ‘It’s finger lickin good’ and Where’s Wally is in crisis, cause there’s limited places around the world for him to blend into the crowd! :)

  26. Paper aeroplanes says:

    Gleeson is a complete tool. I’m surprised he isn’t doing local radio out at Bamaga or putting together food advertising brochures for Woolworths. He is a useless reporter, always has been and always will be.

  27. One legged tap dancer says:

    Our record of renown, the Townsville Bulletin, reported this morning that “more than 1000 tickets” have been sold for the Horn fight.
    Strewth, they’ve given away more than that many tickets.

    • NQ Gal says:

      I hope that TB just missed a 0 from the number of tickets sold. If only 1000 tickets have been sold, TCC and Qld Government (ie you and me) will be paying for the rest of the seats.

      Nanna Anna mentioned “extra precautions for indigenous communities” coming to watch the match. Does anyone know what that means? Will people be barred from returning to communities for 14 days? Does everyone need to be tested before they leave town?

      • The Magpie says:

        Which raises the point The ‘Pie has made on several occasions … if indigenous groups are now recognised as an ‘at risk’ classification needing ‘extra precautions’, why does not the government recognise ‘extra precautions’ are required for other groups, particularly the ageing, and not just in care homes, but generally. Because it is now established beyond any doubt that the fatality risk is with this group, along with those of all ages with pre-existing conditions and weakened immune systems that make the virus a deadly hazard. In that way, surely we can loosen up the economy, allow the general population start returning to normal – even if they get the virus and spent a few days fighting it – and end what is now a posturing political pantomime here in Queensland and elsewhere.

  28. The Farmer Needs A Therapist says:

    WTF is this piece of shitty TV – reality my arse, the script writers and the ‘participants’ need psychological therapy!

  29. Big Red says:

    Qantas have axed another 2,500 jobs, this time ground crew. I wonder if this will have an effect on Kevin Gill’s little Townsville airport? Will airport staff be made redundant? Will Mayor Hill make a statement in support of those staff?

    • The Magpie says:

      So the pretend hunt is on for a new TCC CEO … although the odds are are 100 to 1 ON that the decision has already been made. But we could live in the fool’s paradise of hope and believe there is about to be a massive change of culture in Walker Street … if the successful applicant lives up to these key excerpts from the job description.

      You will direct and drive the organisations operational plans, implement Council vision and develop policies and systems to ensure Council’s affairs are conducted in ways that are transparent, accountable and efficient.

      Keeping the customers at the heart of all activities, you will deliver quality services to facilitate sustainable growth, enhance the enjoyment of residents and unlock the potential of the city through inspired leadership, community engagement and sound financial management.


      You will be commercially minded, with a high level of experience and understanding of the issues facing local, State and Federal Governments and driven to protect and enhance the brand of the organisation.

      Past and current experience would suggest the idea of linking Walker Street to ‘transparent, accountable and efficient’ performance with ‘driven to protect and enhance the brand of the organisation’ would win oxymoron of the month.

      • Garry says:

        Looks like its fair dinkum with council using a recruitment company from SEQ, another big win for Townsville jobs.

        • The Magpie says:

          Well, that’s the better option, if it doesn’t go to the current acting CEO, there is no one around this burgh available with the necessary experience or qualifications … but we could be in danger of yet another unqualified Labor party favour-taker filling the chair.

      • Over it says:

        the gm finance quit and the gm human resources to

  30. The Magpie says:

    Hump Day Humour:

    #sowhat? Been wearing it for years …

  31. The Magpie says:

    More Hump Day Humour (the emphasis on hump)

    If the photo is of one of the stimulus measures, good luck, madam.

  32. C ME FU says:

    In interesting news, the CFMEU have quit the Left faction of the state Labor party, as it is now “a creche for party hacks” and “protection racket for dud members such as Jackie Trad”.


    • Media Tart says:

      The party is imploding (shhhhh don’t tell NMD or ECQ). A tinpot mob of inbreds and incompetents. Sadly, had ‘The Kid’ been given the role of Party leader within the LNP they would have had a real chance at the end of the year. But with the Freckle, who lacks any mongrel and has about as much punch as being hit with a wet lettuce leaf, it will be Labor again. Brainless Queenslanders will vote for the Devil they know and idiot girl power will get back in again.

      • Not the ECQ says:

        So Queenslanders with a brain will vote for who? The wet lettuce, no mongrel Freckle? Some dingaling Palmer mirage? Perilous Pauline and the New-Not-New Bradfield Scheme? Or Not-the-CFMMEU-but-plenty-of-coal-even right-in-Townsville Labor Party. What a choice! And no choice but to fill in every square. So every candidate gets a vote, even from you, Media Tart. Whatchagonnado?

        • Media Tart says:

          I like your break down of what’s on offer on Election Day ECQ. Pretty much proves that we have an endless line up of dipshits in political positions. But I will do what I normally do ECQ – go into the booth and write ‘get fucked’ on the ballot paper.

          • Not the ECQ says:

            If you don’t “normally” vote, don’t whinge about the outcome. In your case impotence is a choice.

          • The Magpie says:

            The ‘Pie is tempted to say that people in Townsville, nay Queensland, indeed, never vote ‘normally’ but that would be a cheap shot, so he won’t.

            But you’re right, as the old adage has it ‘You may be done with politics, but politics isn’t done with you.’

          • The Wulguru Wonder says:

            “One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors.” -Plato

  33. Jenny Wren says:

    Hi Magpie,
    Radio National news at 3pm announced that Townsville Hospital employees have been temperature checking arrivals at the airport today because of the boxing match. Could you sticky beak around? I would have thought all incoming passengers would be checked every day in the current circumstances. Will they be doing this for the V8s?
    Happy hunting and does anyone else know more about this?

    • CEO of Crap says:

      I heard they were being temp checked at their departure points.

    • Achilles says:

      The time to check is when they board = action; if they’re checked on arrival = reaction, which equates to our problem NOT your problem.

      The old addage “prevention is better than cure” seems lost in this scenario.

  34. Manhole Mick says:

    So not only has TCC advertised for a CEO they have also advertised for a Chief Information Officer and General Manager People and Culture. Can any council insiders advise whether these are new positions or have two Executives been pineappled recently and they are looking for replacements? Pretty good coin of around $200k each. CEO is around $400k I think.

    • Deskjockey Dave says:

      There is a common link here and it is the Director they work for – hopeless, toxic and nasty. There will be another job advertised soon with another GM is out the door. The whole Darwin crew are out of control, I really hope the Mayor is watching her back because she will go crazy when she finds out that everything they told her was ok is not.

      • The Magpie says:

        hahaha … mate, she watches nothing else … certainly not forward.

        • The Magpie says:

          But The ‘Pie shouldn’t be so snide about a devoted Magpie reader. A couple of weeks ago, The ‘Pie questioned the underlying agenda of a report that suddenly bobbed up in Walker Street spruiking a glitzy new art gallery for the CBD, and asked if that meant the council intended selling the Perc Tucker building. This question was asked nowhere else in Townsville media. The Bulletin, again denying The ‘Pie a finder’s fee, made a polite enquiry about this yesterday

          Oh, the unnamed fame … and the old bird being called ‘irresponsible’ by Jenny Hill is like a jaywalker being called a criminal psychopath by Ivan Milat.

          • NQ Gal says:

            Madam Mullet – do you know what else limits what exhibitions Townsville can attract? Sacking the best Gallery Director that we ever had. We can have the most modern and beautiful gallery in the world, but without a well connected gallery director, there won’t be any exhibitions.

          • Dutch Reverend says:

            Pie, I can tell you now that the second last paragraph about a facility to show artwork owned by council shown in the article shown is pretty much verbatim of what was proposed by Shane Fitzgerald and his team before being shown the door. This was going to be an integral part of The Hive Development. Same goes for the Museum of Underwater Art. Obviously she didn’t want to share the glory with anyone else. What a deceitful bag.

      • Over it says:

        General manager of finance to. Word is that 3 safety business partners have quit also. All these people under the s**tting assassin

        • Plannit Townsville says:

          Oh but the assassin is so nice. She smiles sweetly at you and asks you how you and your family are, while she slips poison in your tea, besmirches your reputation and and slams a hatchet into your back.

          If only she was as good at her job as she is at destroying people.

          • The Magpie says:

            The ‘Pie is a bit confused (yes, yes, easy, I know but all the same…) You can’t be referring to the mayor, cannot even conjure up a picture of her smiling sweetly or even pretending to ask about one’s nearest and dearest. Who are you talking about? Position only, no names, thanks.

          • Plannit Townsville says:

            Former GM People and Culture, now the Director of Business Services. Nasty bit.

          • Over it says:

            Plannit is referring to the director of business services

          • The (Barely) Civil Engineer says:

            Amen to that my Planning brother. Amen.

            Now back to sprinkling salt, garlic and holy water around my desk.

          • Alahazbin says:

            PT, Is the level 7 hairdresser still there?

          • Plannit Townsville says:

            Never heard of that one. You’ll have to help me out on who you mean.

          • The Magpie says:

            Plannit Townnsville, you’ve just replied to yourself. To whom did you mean to reply?

          • Petunia Pig says:

            Well you can give it lap band surgery but it will still always be that insecure fat hateful spiteful thing on the inside

          • Mike says:

            Solid fucking gold! Plannit your prose is literary genius.

        • Deskjockey Dave says:

          Apparently the Director is reading the blog and going all defensive saying to key staff that it is not her decision its the Mayor.

          Wonder where the truth is.

          • Plannit Townsville says:

            Well officially the Mayor can’t intervene in staffing issues below the CEO. So it doesn’t matter what the Director claims about the Mayor. Buck stops with the Director.

          • The Magpie says:

            But but but Plannit, me old lovie, that would takes some personal guts to defy Jenny Vader. What are you thinking?

          • Plannit Townsville says:

            Does take some guts to defy Jenny. But she’s usually too busy looking for photo ops and micromanaging the CEO and councillors to worry about lower level staff. This particular Director has a long history of having her own agenda and targeting staff all by herself. So I’m thinking, don’t believe anything she says.

          • Petunia Pig says:

            Plannit is right, this is the directors doing, looks like someone is running around telling porky pies and thinks everybody is stupid, doing things for personal benefit or gain is corrupt.

    • Plannit Townsville says:

      Do Nothing Dave the current CIO is off to the RFDS while he waits out his retirement.
      The only thing TCC should be concerned about is that while they’ve employed Dave, he’s done nothing. The employment of Dave is a lesson in why you shouldn’t take employment recommendations from dodgy contractors.

    • David J says:

      Probably more like $250k upwards and then, dont forget their big fat bonuses! How is it that public servants are entitled to bonuses? Apparently everybody from team manager upwards gets a bonus, while the workers who do all the actual work, often meaning ridiculous overtime is done and not compensated for.

  35. The Magpie says:

    When will the Astonisher do the right thing and start paying The Magpie a finders fee?

    Only three weeks late, and six days behind The Magpie, who reported in last weekend’s blog:

    The ‘Pie is reliably told that investment is stalling across the city, with businesses looking elsewhere for what they believe are fairer opportunities. The ‘Pie understands the likes of Stockland, Dexus (Willows) Parkside (Tapiolas family) QIC (Domain) and, most famously, Qantas, are all baulking at the sudden and arbitrary high handedness of an unpredictable covert council (read mayor). Stockland have sold their Northshore shopping Centre and it settled two weeks ago. More money is fleeing the city, according to Magpie contacts.

    And a suitable photograph, from 2011! With then mayor Les Tyrell.

    • Memories says:

      good to see les tyrell back. That reminds me about an online story last week about something out Woodstock way. Sorry I forgot what it was about but the mayor was involved however the pictures were of soil turning and in the background was Tony parsens and I think Trevor Roberts, the later ran again recently i think? Talk about shit reporting and checking.

      • The Magpie says:

        Well, a touch of fairness … the pic was clearly captioned that it is was the sod turning (a sod turning the sod?) of the DriveIt project some time ago, but yes, strange to use it, maybe running out of budget to pay for real time photographs..

    • One legged tap dancer says:

      Photo in today’s Townsville Bulletin gives lie to claims that 10,000 attended last night’s fight, and those ringside seats which were said to be sold out were almost empty (except for the first few rows).
      So Jenny Hill, can you please let ratepayers know how much we paid for the empty seats?

      • The Magpie says:

        Well, whoa up a bit, singular one … yes, there is a question, but you have asked the wrong one.

        This is clearly a pic taken during the early stages of the crowd build-up, so your conclusion is surely incorrect. The REAL QUESTION is why did the Bulletin, an unashamed and embarrassing fact-free booster of this event, choose to use only this crowd photograph rather than one closer to the big fight time? The deadline for putting the paper ‘to bed’ gave ample opportunity to do so – this is self-evident, as there were plenty of pics of the fight itself – and even allow for a cheating angle to look better than it perhaps was. And there was plenty of time for someone called Nick Wright to file his appallingly bad juvenile writing about the various events of the night (just accept it mate, you ain’t no Jimmy Breslin, you can’t write for shit).

        Adding to this complete clusterfuck coverage is today’s lame, ill-informed and plain idiotic iditorial, claiming a shining success and a bright, city-saving future for Total Tools stadium. The paper, it’s editor and his southern overlords are in deep denial about the gravity of Townsville’s position through past mismanagement and hidden agenda decision making. They have again proved that the Townsville Bulletin is not part of the city’s solution, it is a big part of the city’s problem.

        Yes, yes, The ‘Pie knows he goes on about this, but rest assured, he will continue to do so because it is not so much that he loves to expose this despicable power elite, but that he loves what Townsville COULD be.

        • The Magpie says:

          Of course, there was one rivetted spectator ringside … riveted to her phone most of the time, no doubt on the Stock Market app, checking the latest Magnis share price (almost 25 cents).

          • Fashions on the field says:

            I think in that pic she was on EBay bidding on some new pink doonas. They are very popular amongst women who like to sport a male Billy Ray Cyrus hairstyle.

          • Achilles says:

            Boody display fo bad manners and lack of consideration for others. How is it that they’re all sitting side by side, and not wearing masks? Can’t do that at the footy!

          • I’ll be plucked says:

            Nah, she went pale when she read the emailed bill from the promoter, for the TCC contribution to the event. How MUCH was it Mullet???

          • Moment says:

            Is that a ‘hickey’ under his right ear? Wasn’t me!

    • Cantankerous but happy says:

      Funny they pull out a pic from when Townsville was at its best under King Les and investors were lining up to get into the place, sharp contrast to the amateur run shithole of today that business is trying to leave.

  36. Mike Douglas says:

    Burdekin Council transparency stating rate payments at this period vs last year are 30 % down ( $2 mil ) and 50 ratepayers have registered for periodic payment plans . Will T.C.C. be that transparent or is that yet another “ commercial in confidence “ matter .

  37. Dolf says:

    More insightful decision by the Premier.

    So sending kids to school is safe, but sending the same kids going to Schoolies is not.

    Wow COVID-19 is a cunning disease waiting to get the kids when they leave the school grounds.

    • Garry says:

      Ha, the Schoolies should organise an AFL grand final, or a fight instead.

      • The Magpie says:

        Can’t understand what authorities could do if the kids just simply decided to descend on the usual haunts. Anyway, as will be further expounded in the weekend blog, kids are at no more risk from the virus as they are of ‘flu and other seasonal nasties. The main transmission at schoolies will remain the clap.

    • The (Barely) Civil Engineer says:

      Kids in school = safe. Kids in detention = at risk.

      Teachers at no risk. Prison guards at risk.

      This is very confusing.

  38. I’ll be plucked says:

    TB online is reporting Adani has been court-ordered to pay 100m dollars to ‘customers’ of the Abbot Pt terminal, near Bowen. Anyone know what this is all about? That’s a whopping amount of money.

    • I’ll be plucked says:

      Just saw the updated headline now includes the words ‘exploited customers’. What have Adani been up to???

    • The Magpie says:

      Checking the legal website but the guts of is that a court has ordered Adani to pay more than $100 million to customers of using the Abbot Point coal terminal, after a judge ruled the Indian mining giant had engaged in ‘unconscionable conduct and exploitative and dishonest behaviour’.

      The legal dispute was between Adani and four users of its Abbot Point Terminal port – Lake Vermont Resources, QCoal, Byerwen Coal and Sonoma Mine Management – in relation to the charges the companies were paying for access and handling at the North Queensland port.
      In yesterday’s judgement, Justice Jean Dalton ordered Adani pay $37.9 million to Lake Vermont Resources, $25.3 million to QCoal, $31.7 million to Byerwen and $11.9 million to the Sonoma Mine.

      The judge ruled that Adani had ripped off (not her words) its port customers for use of the facility and had engaged in “dishonest behaviour” and went out of its way to structure transactions so that it received an extra $255 million payment.

      Our. mayor must be distraught for her mate, ‘Got’em’ Adani, the fine upstanding investor who was going to work miracles for Townsville if only the ratepayers would give $18.5million for an airstrip. And that’s a matter we still don’t know about because of the secretive court manouverings denying FOI requests for details of what is increasingly looking like a corrupt deal involving the Townsville and Rockhampton Councils.
      The Indian courts are also after him on other unrelated matters.

      • I’ll be plucked says:

        Thanks Pie, great work and information. Pluck me hey, MULLET backs another winner………NOT!

        • The Magpie says:

          Probably had a lazy grand on Horn, too.

          • I’ll be plucked says:

            Hmmm, she’s in ANOTHER corner re the burst water main back in March, that water damaged the businesses on CT Rd. ABC reporting TCC Insurance won’t pay up – some businesses are considering legal action against the TCC. She stated at the time that the damage/losses would be covered by TCC Insurance………

  39. Speaking in tongues says:

    So Scotty from marketing is going to overule the States if they have deals or partnerships with the Chinese of which Scomo and Fuhrer Dutton consider to be a risk to national sovereignty! Not a bad idea TBH. Australia has sold off enough of its farms, daries, land, water and ports to them already. But can you imagine Scomo preventing Nanna Anna or Queen Mullet from engaging in a deal, or worse, if Scomo steps in and disbands a cure t arrangement? Oh dear, our Labor stalwarts won’t like that will they ECQ??

    • The Magpie says:

      While he’s about it, and while all the industries you name are correct, the one that The Magpie would like to see recinded over which The ‘Pie gagsat the very thought is WATER. Who the fuck had the bright idea to let private enterprise ‘market’ … i.e. control water sharing – in the first place. Treasonous behaviour from scumbag politicians of all stripes.

      • Speaking in tongues says:

        That is correct Magpie – WATER. It’s fucking obvious thatnout little nation of 25 million is the host to feed the appetites of 1.2 billion Chinese and growing. Precious Governments should be put in the gulag and then shot for selling off our life supplying assets. Not to mention letting mining companies flog all our fucking minerals for a half century without any royalties or Australian taxes being paid. It’s a disgrace. As much as I don’t like Scomo, the penny has finally dropped that if something doesn’t change his kids and grandkids will be housed in communist camps in the future.

    • Not the ECQ says:

      Sit, not sure Labor “stalwarts” will say much – AAlbanese has been mutely bipartisan on matters of sovereignty and so-called national security. But no doubt your average Aussie will still be quite happy to offload their family home, farm or block of flats to the first fistful of dollars from whatever country, including China. And I notice that Chinese cars are enjoying the biggest boom in sales in Australia as other brands languish – admittedly from a low base. Our university system might take a serious hit from the Morrison position though. And that won’t be funny. Australia needs to continually upskill the population, especially for the post-Covid recovery. Sneaky won’t cut it.

  40. Egghead says:

    E.T lookalike Peter Dutton said this today about Anna Alphabet;
    “Premier Palaszczuk is a panicker and she doesn’t want a single case in the run-up to the state election, but the price to pay for that is that people are losing their businesses, their jobs, and it’s unacceptable”. Very very true E.T. Hopefully Queensland will grow a brain and vote out this toxic blemish called the Labor Party once and for all.

    • The Magpie says:

      Well, Over Easy, you have made a timely comment, as one of the main matters in the weekend blog will be the great Covid Con which has gone from admirable to woeful.

      • Egghead says:

        Thanks Pie, glad to see a Blog with its finger on the pulse. I do have one respectful request to make regarding your next article if I may;
        – no photos of Jenny in her pink doona, and
        – no closeups of E.T. (Maybe use old photos of when he had hair)
        Thank you.

  41. Mugwump says:

    Disgraceful and inexplicable … the Bulletin cannot ignore asking Coralee O’Rouke the obvious question: why? On what grounds?

    If no offical reason as to why Federal Elected and Ex ADF MP is being denied access to a Ex Services and current service personal facility, by localnstate member Coralee O’Rourke then she has a hell of a lot of explaining to do. Petty vindictiveness for no reason.


  42. Dutch Reverend says:

    Has anyone asked the question as to why Anne Marie Greedy is currently the “Acting Mayor”?

  43. FUBAR says:

    the story today running down south about the mother from nsw who was denied entry to Queensland hospital and was diverted to Sydney 16hrs later.

    She had complications with one of the babies ( 27 weeks pregnant) and needed medical attention, gold Coast hospital was the closest but qld health denied her entry and had to be flown south. One child is now going to be still born unfortunately. One can argue that they cant be blamed because theres a chance that baby wasnt going to live. But to have a hospital anywhere denied entry to an emergency situation is unacceptable. The premiere and her fucken heath officer should resing now!!! I would call the lnp too if they were in power. This on the back of alphabet saying people of nsw have there hospital we have ours for Queenslanders. What a fucken joke. So now if a car crash happens 100m from gold coast border we need to make sure we check the licence of the person in case they arnt from Queensland. All the Labor voters should hang there head’s in shame

      • The Magpie says:

        That should have been priority information, but was not. The confused and unnecessary clusterfuck of the Queensland border closures was typified by Palaszczuk’s virtue signalling to voters about her Queensland chauvinism, with statements that blurred the emergency issue. From today’s Courier:
        As Prime Minister Scott Morrison demanded a please-explain over the case, Premier Annastacia Palaszczuk refused to resile from comments earlier this month that “in Queensland, we have Queensland hospitals for our people”.

        It’s understood neither the family nor doctors applied for an exemption from Queensland, believing the 14-day quarantine period would apply.
        Northern NSW Local Health District chief executive Wayne Jones said the border restrictions had factored into the decision to send the woman south. “While the preferred location for the family to give birth was at a hospital in Brisbane, under the Queensland Border Direction at the time, the woman and her partner would have had to quarantine in a government hotel for 14 days, at their own expense, prior the procedure,” he said.
        “Following discussion with Royal Prince Alfred specialists in Sydney, the woman travelled to Sydney for the procedure where she would not be required to quarantine.”

        The medical staff making these decisions are educated, intelligent and compassionate people … who were poorly informed because messaging priority was given to a vote catching exercise.

        • Steve, Belgian Gardens says:

          Given that the border direction allows for emergency exemptions, and that this can’t have been the first emergency situation in northern NSW in the last five months, the cause of NSW Health’s stuff up needs to be determined, but you can’t seriously suggest that these educated medical staff are making decisions based on the news.

          • The Magpie says:

            Why not? How else? But, Steve, if you are seriously suggesting the medical staff DID NOT make their decision based on the news (and why would they doubt the news?), what information did they seek and from where did the get idea they had to go to Sydney?

          • Steve, Belgian Gardens says:

            Hopefully in time the source of the misunderstanding will be revealed.

      • Old Tradesman says:

        You know what Steve, you really should go to bed wearing boxing gloves.

      • FUBAR says:

        How far are you hanging your head steve

    • Cantankerous but happy says:

      Yep, and all of us thought Jackie Trad was the putrid callous arsehole of the group, Anna Alphabet has proven herself the real champion.

  44. Dutch Reverend says:

    I’m with you Garry. Mullet for Mundigburra and Frothy for Thuringowa. Same move Paul Jacob made at the last State election. Have a crack but still have the council gig to fall back on if they fail.

    • The Magpie says:

      Didn’t Jacob promise to donate any council salary while he was away campaigning to some charity or other? Haven’t heard any details, but then, the Angry Ant is a such a humble fellow, doesn’t want the glare of publicity shone on his virtue.

Post a Comment

The Magpie encourages all to take part in the discussion and let their voice be heard.
In order to post a comment, you must provide a name. While you don't have to use your real name, it should be something unique so users can identify you in the discussion. Generic names like “Anonymous” will likely result in your comment being ignored.
Let the discussion begin!

Current ye@r *

Countdown until the next council election:

-1428Days -4 -56 -33