Want to learn Italian, but keep quiet about it. There’s the old line about the only way to make Italians shut up is to tie their hands behind their backs. Here’s a starter lesson in Itie as she is signed.
Now, in this unsubtle, show-all, let it all hang out (literally in most cases) world of no titillating mystery or old fashioned daydreaming, The Magpie rates this pic of an unfortunate young lady as the sexiest around.
The ‘Pie was thinking of starting a ‘Bring Back the Bush’ campaign, but realised with his luck, we’d get George W back again.
They say that sex remains popular because it’s centrally located, so blokes (and some gals) will always be drawn in by a chance glimpse of what, in Victorian novels, was called ‘forbidden fruit’ – although it’s doubtful the word ‘pussy’ was a euphemism in those days.
There’s another approach for the geeky Big Bang Theory fellas, if humour doesn’t go down that well.
Oh, still my beating …ummm … heart. But it would seem none of the above would be of interest to the Cowboys RL players, if the Townsville Bulletin aka the Daily Astonisher is to be believed (the jury still out on that one).
In this modern world of terror, horror and general bastardry, wise words from the past should be heeded.
In fact, the player most prominent in the pic is Antonio Winterstein, who is precisely the type one WOULDN’T see having a cherry diaquiri decorated with a bamboo umbrella down at the Sovereign Hotel. One wonders if The Bulletin realised their unintended gaffe, because a few days later, Antonio and his family – partner Brooke and youngsters Harlan and Milanah – were the front-page feature family in the Astonisher’s special insert ‘Townsville Families’. Nothing wrong with any lifestyle choice, but best to be the true one.
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Hey, with all us poor people struggling to fill up with gas, here’s an idea that should be revived just to let us know what’s going where.
As if pollies around the world don’t have enough media minefields to tread through, in Scotland, the bloke leading the charge for independence from Britain has to contend with this.
It’s an image problem in the commercial world,too, but you’d think a huge corporation would have a bit more foresight.
… and even everyday, wholesome product have their perception pitfalls.
Best keep the door close and use the back.
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And here’s something you WON’T find at Starbucks … only a small coffee shop in Scotland could come up with something that extra bit special with your morning caffeine – especially if you’re a pretty lassie.
… and the next day, the next step …
… and if the barista gets knocked back, here’s next mornings message.
How to make people buy advertising on your website – The Magpie might start putting a pic up of Jenny Hill in a bikini, with the same message.
Top 5 Smart Arse answers………….
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Great tit tweak fo a very unpleasant old turkey.
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=803907552983161&set=vb.102313626475894&type=2&theaterhttps://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=803907552983161&set=vb.102313626475894&type=2&theater
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An oldie but a goldie – still raises a laugh – unless your a Yank.
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=3809792413185&set=vb.1528716977&type=2&theater
Which is one reason The Magpie steers clear of Facebook as much as possible.
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Speaking of adorable …. Look what the cat dragged in.
They do things differently in China.
And this sort of fits in here … no fighting, please, plenty of Braised Intestine Surface to go round.
Which puts one in mind of the Berk of Edinburgh’s comment during a speech in China years ago ” If it’s got legs and isn’t a chair, if it flies and it isn’t a plane and if it moves in the ocean and isn’t a submarine, the Chinese will eat it’.
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