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The Magpie

Sunday, March 29th, 2020   |   269 comments

A Cool-Headed And Dignified Old Bird, The Magpie Is Taking This New World Order Calmly, Without Panic … Well Almost.  

Pear- globe flat small

Damn that Bentley, didn’t know he was there. The ‘Pie now waits nervously to see if there is a similar reaction in store for him when the Cox and Box council election results come down. But our dear old town is already pear shaped.

Inevitably, COVID-19 has spawned, in equal measure, panic and hilarity, sometimes the hilarity being at the panicked measures. The Magpie does a little round-up.

But pear-shaped or not, our world wobbles on, with viruses and voting taking the attention away from some other interesting bits and pieces, most reported during the week in comments.

Worth a reprise is news that while battery factory proponents, Magnis Resources may now be dead as a doornail, someone made a killing in the stock back in January. The timing was interesting.

And that mysterious parking ban in South Townsville on event nights at the Total Tools stadium … is this just another club-footed attempt by the council at clunky social engineering? Seems like it …

But first …

A Pox On That Bloody Virus

There’s not much to add to the already blanket coverage and the main thrust of the COVID-19 restrictions, that have come upon our society with the speed of a cardiac arrest … and the collective social upending of everyday life is well – and not so well – documented elsewhere.

Some advice is to be taken at face value (ha! ‘Face Value’ – now there’s a headline the Astonisher, so fond of PUN-ishing us with it’s front pages, hasn’t thought of!) and other hints, while well meaning, have had a grating effect. Poor old Bentley, who is – ahem – no spring chicken, is particularly galled by the repetitive advice that hand washing should take as long it takes to sing Happy Birthday –  twice. The ‘Pie is with him on this.

Happy f... birthday small Oh, well, it least it wasn’t Achey Breaky Heart. A much better musical mnemonic was this very clever effort to a Beatles classic – yep, you guessed – ‘I Want To Hold Your Hand’.

But there has been an unfortunate tendency that to get the message of the danger across, some pointy heads, ably abetted by sensation-seeking media, just had to go over the top. Especially those in love with graphs, statistics and Year 5 mathematics, which conveniently overlook very pivotal factors to scare the pants off everybody.

For instance, there has a distinct reluctance, even a refusal in some instances, of including the ages of the deceased (most were elderly), which at the time of writing, stands at 14, and the presence of pre-existing conditions (which in truth would probably have been the death knell combined with a nasty bout of ‘flu.) Alarmist, long-bow conjecture like this is is both totally unnecessary just eats away at credibility.

Hundreds of k to dieScreen Shot 2020-03-27 at 9.35.22 pm

That sort of stuff becomes counter-productive to informing intelligent adults. (OK, OK, The ‘Pie hears you, but that’s another discussion for another time.). The ‘Pie reckons that boffin is to the COVID-19 reality what Tim ’we’ll all be under water by 2020’ Flannery is to climate change. But perceptions certainly are changing.

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And COVID-19 certainly hasn’t attacked people’s funny bones.

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The Wulguru Wonder
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While Prince Charles is isolated with Covid-19, Prince Andrew has decided to self isolate with Jennifer-14.

And some very sensible ideas for coping from the most unlikely sources.

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That Vote

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Way too early to say anything worthwhile at the time of writing, but Mayor Mullet has grabbed a handy lead in the first handful of votes. If the percentage trends continue, we have the interesting outcome that fathead Clive Palmer has done himself a major mischief. Because his man, Dishface Dowling, almost certain to be third in a four horse race, will have grabbed enough primaries to see Fathead’s arch enemy Jenny Hill returned to the Walker Street plush.

But, oh my, those postal votes, and the pre-polling count are going to be fascinating. A long Sunday is ahead.

One Mullet admirer sent his best wishes to the mayor.


Flat Battery

An interesting circumstance that seems like jiggery pokery in high places dropped into the Nest during the week. From comments:

The Magpie 

March 25, 2020 at 9:54 pm  (Edit)

Looks like someone made a stock market killing in Magnis shares. The stock has been in a swan dive … well, more a swan glide … for almost three years now …

Magnis 1IMG_8272

… but in mid-January, there was an unexplained but significant spike in the steady three year slide of the stock. Magnis Energy is, of course, the main proponent of the proposed battery factory at the controversial and disputed Lansdown industrial site at Woodstock.
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Around the time that Mayor Jenny Hill insisted that despite protests and widespread opposition to the industrial estate where Magnis was to build, the proposal on council land would nevertheless go ahead. A few days later in January, Mayor Hill rammed the unpopular proposal through her puppet council.

Almost immediately after the spike, someone cashed in a sizeable chunk of shares for a handsome profit.

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But to no avail, Magnis shares continued to tank, and are now practically worthless – .7 of a cent as of close on Friday.

Magnis 2IMG_8273

The battery factory looks dead in the water, as do other tentative proposals for the Lansdown estate.

Oh well, someone’s smiling a thin-lipped smile all the way to the bank.

One Of Life’s Small Mysteries

We all love a good mystery, and the initial Magnis deal is one of them, but there’s and there’s plenty of others around this town, like who is Steve Price’s tailor, and does TEL ACTUALLY do? …

There is also the far more serious matter of the secret deal between Adani and Jenny Hill over that airstrip deal … that’s back in QCAT court on April 14. Adani is appealing the Information Commissioner’s order to release of details, but we don’t know why, no proceedings have revealed the company’s argument, and the TCC don’t want it out there either.

To be added to those mysteries is the edict about the restrictions on parking in areas of South Townsville and Railway Estate on ‘event nights’ at the Total Tools stadium.

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The whole stadium parking fiasco was clearly designed by Clusterfuck Consulting, probably somewhere in a Brisbane restaurant over a long lunch, but it would seem that Mayor Mullet has had a hand in this piece of inanity which will have unintended consequences. Signs are posted around the area advising of the restriction to 15 minutes parking on those nights, and the parking wallopers will be on overtime to nab those who transgress. You can bet they’ll be given quotas to make sure their overtime bill is covered.

But this is a weird and counter-productive edict.

First of all, as far as The ‘Pie broad investigations reveal, NO ONE IN EITHER SUBURB ASKED FOR IT. In fact, there are plenty of residents who are pissed off about it, because it disadvantages the residents themselves, most of whom have off street parking anyway. Typical is this sign in a lift in a unit complex.

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Having a dinner party, with guests from, say, Wulguru and maybe Douglas? Or a BBQ to watch the footy because the stadium is …as we are have told so often … sold out? Or maybe one of those frequent prayer meetings (clothes optional) known to take place in those suburbs? Complex directions will be needed, until someone decides it’s not worth the hassle.

Then there is the question of Palmer Street. It’s nice new car park opposite Southbank or whatever its called now, will be chockers with footy goers, with no guarantee that they’ll stick around for a feed afterwards. So punters who don’t give a toss about footy on a Friday night and just want to go to a restaurant will be able to park … where? Not beyond the lighthouse intersection, because the road is becoming one-way with widened footpaths for no discernible reason. So much for helping struggling businesses.

One Palmer Street business owner and very unhappy camper has the theory that this is a Jenny Hill attempt at social engineering to further her increasingly desperate attempts to funnel stadium crowds into the CBD. Encouraging them to park in that proximity will do the trick, she reckons.

All this and other attempts by our mayor to apply the resuscitation paddles to the dead heart will one day make an interesting subject for a PhD thesis, but only after the CBD tumbleweed has finally blown away.

Totally Unconfirmed But Sounds Possible


The ‘Pie has been informed tonight (Saturday) that TCC CEO Mike Chiodo has resigned, and will be gone in two weeks.

Sounds feasible for two reasons. In recent photographs, Mr Chiodo hasn’t looked to be in robust health. And he was no doubt asked to stay on until the election was over, jumping ship before the campaign, let alone during bit, would be a crook look for the mayor.

The alacrity with which he is reported to have resigned would lend support to this speculation.

Trump Goes One Better Than Offering Kool Aid

The terrorist in the White House – let’s call him Agent Orange – has gone full-on bizarre with his ‘gut feeling’ advice and predictions regarding COVID-19. He named a quack remedy – chloroquine – for the virus on national TV, and that landed a couple of Darwin candidates in hospital, who found some in their pantry. Turned out it was a fish tank cleaner with another the same chemical in its title.

PTrump gaggedHOTO-2020-03-26-14-06-34

And America has a new hero in Dr Anthony Fauci, the director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases. Dr Fauci hasn’t been afraid to –ever so politely – contradict Trump, as he did about Chloroquine. He also knocked down this irresponsible idiot’s pledge to have the country back working by the end of April. So far, Trump seems to know that he can’t fire Fauci … yet, anyway.

But hey, so many Americans accept that they should believe a reality TV pussy grabber and his ‘gut feeling’ over an expert who has spent a lifetime in medical research. Surely the day is coming when ….

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And Finally, Something To Charm You Rather Than Alarm You

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Scientists in Melbourne have discovered some new species of ‘dancing spiders’. These ‘peacock spiders’ are unique to Australia, and they would put to The Village People – and their wardrobe manager – to shame. The second video here will make you’re glad you’re Stayin’ Alive. Enjoy.

And A Final Thought For Townsville Voters, No Matter What The Outcome

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“The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.’

Maureen Dowd NYT


Stay with comments today, as the count comes in, there’s bound to be a few feverish commentators venting one way or the other. You can, too.

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  1. Last Drinks says:

    Only 1094 days till the next Council Election. Bad luck Old Bird.

  2. Fishframe says:

    Damn vote splitting. I can see clearly now that Dowling has significant votes that I suspect would have gone Cox’s way. Hill has a substantial lead as a result.

  3. Fishframe says:

    More businesses shut down – Qld has urgently shut down all Gun Stores and Armourers midnight last night. Apart from the local lost jobs, most would say so what. But I downloaded the Qld Public Health Act last night. Some changes have been made (must be recent) to include covid-19. They appear to greatly extend the powers of public health officers. Add that to the Army assisting the Police and my concern is that there is more of a lock down coming then we might think. See Division 5 – https://www.legislation.qld.gov.au/view/html/inforce/current/act-2005-048#sec.362L

  4. Qtinker says:

    Regardless of the election results I’ve decided to sell up and get outta Tville. Mayor mullet (even that’s praising her) has literally done years of damage that will take any decent council years to reverse (and what if she gets back in!?!?)

    I hope Mullet and her “team” read these comments so they learn (if that’s possible) that people are literally leaving Townsville because of their incompetence and self serving agenda. A very sad situation indeed.

  5. City dweller says:

    Not sure how you cam vote an LNP federal member with a majority then keep labor locally. Got me fucked, and i bet shes grinning thinking hoe hard people tried to get rid of her. Wonder how long it will be before the TCC becomes insolvent? CCC still chasing councils all over QLD. Dont forget that.

  6. Scientician79 says:

    The result is pretty fucking depressing.

    And of course it is for Mullet an endorsement by the voters of Townsville for her last four years of policy.

    Adani airstrip here we come I guess.

    • The Magpie says:

      Well, a lot will depend on the make-up of the council. If there are two or three willing to do a ‘Paul Jacob’ and call her out on some of her more dodgy escapades, that will be a step in stemming the downward spiral. And of course that depends on the Bulletin doing its job -unbiased and factual reporting, which it seems to have started doing over the past few months …. and the kiddies of the TV ending the kindy naps and do some real digging. And the ABC local radio could grow a pair and do more reporting in the interests of the community.

  7. The Wulguru Wonder says:

    A great example of some of the misinformation out there in internet land regarding Coronavirus. And this from a reputable and distinguished university too.

    John Hopkins University on their Coronavirus Resource page is stating that Australia currently has 460 Coronavirus deaths. Someone in their halls of academia and research needs to do some basic fact checking.

  8. MickNQ says:

    Wonder if there will be any debt forgiveness for QNI rates now that Dowling has done a fine job of splitting the vote…

  9. Mike Douglas says:

    Thanks Clive , all your $600k did was split Mayoral and Councillor voting delivering what appears to be the Mullet and Team Hill back in control of our City . Also noticed NQSA facebook posts were authorised by Peter Newey . Surely not the same Peter Newey who runs TRRA Facebook page which has been promoting NQSA yet supposed to represent residents and ratepayers .

    • Fishframe says:

      So what you’re saying is that we shouldn’t be surprised if Hill gets in and does a backflip on QNI reopening !

  10. J.B says:

    Here is the live election count for Townsville city mayor

    • The Magpie says:

      On the face of it, Mayor Mullet (pro tem) must be sweating on this not going to preferences. She would probably still get home, but the end numbers would be far from a smirking mandate for her destructive policies.

  11. Cantankerous but happy says:

    The council election merely confirms what many have suspected, the average person in Townsville is a brainless fuckhead, who seem to enjoy a life of misery and poverty . It’s pointless getting upset about it, just time to sit back and enjoy watching their struggles and laugh at their misfortune, who needs Netflix when we have Townsville to entertain us, free of charge.

    • The Magpie says:

      Well, on one level, The Magpie ain’t too fussed, he had been wondering what use he’d be if there was a transparent mature council team in place, with the Bulletin suddenly starting to take some of the burden of the revelations of inconvenient truths off the old bird and TEL disbanded. Almost his entire repetoire blown to smithereens in one fell swoop. But it seems he can rest easy with the prospect of years of fun and games, maybe a CCC inquiry if he’s lucky, as our little Malteaser goes on her merry way. Wot-ho, wot fun, Biggles …

      • Bentley says:

        Yes, that’s right ‘Pie, it was in fact a Biggles quote which said,”You can see more of what’s under the surface from altitude.”

  12. I’ll be plucked says:

    NO NO NANETTE is getting a toweling from Blom in that division – on the wrong side of the track AGAIN! :)

    Folks don’t like a swinger who will roll the dice at anything!

    • I’ll be plucked says:

      PS Cook is getting smashed in his division too! There might be hope yet for some non-Hill types getting in and fearlessly holding this mob to account!

    • The Magpie says:

      Indeed, and that may well have ben part of the problem for Sam Cox.

  13. InsatiableQ says:

    Hi Magpie
    I have reading your blog for some time but now feel impelled to ask. Is the current situation with this so-called pandemic an extra large push to fulfill United Nations Charter No 51? This was mentioned in a letter to the editor [Bulletin] about this time in 2017 but I have no way of checking it out.

    By the way, the Q of my pen-name is short for ‘questions’.

  14. One legged tap dancer says:

    Being an optimist, I’m looking to the future and some things that might happen now the election is done and dusted.
    Who knows, the police might suddenly find time to investigate the collision involving Jenny Hill in which a motorcyclist was killed, giving the deceased’s family long overdue closure. We might also find out whether or not our mayor will be charged with any offence.
    Then, come October, the LNP might win the state election and let the Crime and Corruption Commission off the leash to investigate Townsville City Council.
    There’s also a real possibility that the council will go broke, leading to the appointment of an administrator.
    Hope springs eternal.

    • The Magpie says:

      Perhaps, but here;’s a perspective. The police may well have reached a conclusion (presumably that the rider was at fault) and have privately advised the family … sorry for your loss and all that usual shining insincerity. The family would unlikely to reveal that outcome and the police have decided they will make their findings public when they choose … which may well be after a coronial inquiry where they will give their evidence. It is clear that mayor Mullet is in the clear, because if she wasn’t, there’d be a few ticklish questions asked by the CCC of the bluebags.

      • Fishframe says:

        I think the family was angry and is probably looking for a reason to speak.

      • Hondaman says:

        As a motorcyclist of many years, I am still finding it hard to grasp that a rider travelling in a straight line who has an accident with a vehicle which turns across his lane, actually multiple lanes, could be considered to be at fault! The damage on the vehicle seems to be just behind the front wheel/ mudguard area of the car, which would suggest that the driver in turning, probably did not see the rider. This action is driving without due care and attention in my book. You could probably add ‘And causing death’ to that charge! The smear job on the rider’s character by the Bulletin was disgusting, given that no evidence existed to back their statement at the time of the death. I hope when the Coronial enquiry runs its course, if no evidence as to the rider’s lack of sobriety is proven, the family will sue the Bulletin to the Maximum possible!!

        • The Magpie says:

          And if he was travelling in a straight line goes through a red light? Still no fault?

          • Hondaman says:

            Magpie, did you receive my answer to your question, it was sent today??

          • The Magpie says:

            Yup … why too much speculation, which may well set off a whole load of other chatter which I could well do without, and anyway, it would get us nowhere, so wasn’t posted. Don’t necessarily disagree with what you say, but just decided it would be inviting further speculation. No point. That said, The ‘Pie would like you and others whose comments occasionally don’t make to the blog that The ‘Pie still appreciates that you folk go to the trouble to engage, sorry if the umpire’s decision sometimes goes against you.

  15. Arthur Itis says:

    Poor Old Toonsville….seems to be going progressively backwards and if it keeps on this current trend, more bad news will probably be covid up.

  16. Mike Gladstone says:

    While Hill J. certainly has her um, flaws, it’s the quality of the opposition that virtually ensures her re-election. Let’s face it, she ain’t going to walk away because she cops a shed load of criticism. She’s a politician.

    • The Magpie says:

      It’s not what she did or didn’t do, it’s what the voters did nor didn’t do that decides the fate of this city. And much of that rests on the campaign opposing her. You can only fight as well as your opponent lets you.

  17. Pencil Dick says:

    Geez Pie, the comments this morning are coming quicker than confirmed cases of the virus!

    Good to see we are moving forward and looking for any positives that may come from the results coming through!

    • The Magpie says:

      Well from The ‘Pie’s point of view, the fact that palmer man Paul Bagneal looks like rolling Russ Cook gives great hope of some interesting times ahead in the council chamber.

  18. Cajun says:

    I can’t understand why all the comments about vote splitting between Sam and what’s his name, bringing the downhill contingent unstuck. Did people vote first past the post? Otherwise the preferences flowing from the third placed person will surely all go to the other candidate and not to Jenny. I am sure the downhill voters would have been careful to vote preferentially to make sure their vote ended up counting.

  19. home alone in DIV 9 says:

    exit boohoo Doyle … enter Mooney Jnr … the ppl of TSV will mostly swallow anything … aargh !

  20. Council worker says:

    Just want you all to know that even though its ts not what we wanted it will only a matter of time until tje true financial situation of TCC comes to light. Last drinks here can have his time in the sun gloating, we would have. But im already seeing the council going close to administration in the next 12mths. The corona virus will shorten up the rates revenue and hill will have no choice soon but to ease rates to let things settle. Problem now is the revenue for services.

    They will become more urgent but without collecting enough money borrowing will increase as you have seen already. If the LNP get in it might happen sooner but even state labor vant hide bad money management for ever. It may actually be a good thing some of the inderpendents didn’t win because tjey would have had a bigger problem tjen that was left by Mooney. All up the virus will highlight the problems even more now, that prediction was never made i see. Anyway dont be depressed everyone just concentrate on not getting the bug. C

    • The Magpie says:

      The ‘Pie is surprised that some people appear to think the old bird is depressed with the likely outcome. He certainly believes that Townsville deserves better, and Jenny Hill is addicted to scheming and has neither the wit nor intelligence to right the wrongs of this city, many of which have happened, and will continue to happen, by her own hand.

      But on the other side of the coin, The Magpie is very much like the soldiers who vowed they would follow their bumbling, error-prone general anywhere … mainly out of curiosity. The view from up here will be fascinating.

      • Council worker says:

        Sorry mate i didn’t think you were depressed. At least you know you got a job for next 4years. I know your on donation. As one other comment said, how can LNP get in federal but the same people vote labor locally. I can’t understand how people think when they drive past long grass for weeks on end. I can guarantee all of you that pipe on charters towers rd wont be the last. It will come out in the wash.

    • Last Drinks says:

      Stop it CW. you have got me giggling again. Cox as your great hope. You are kidding. You lot have thrown Last, Jane A and Cox at Jenny and she has mown down all three. Clive tried to influence the result with an obscene amount of cash and only made a dent. I will give you a clue. Cox wanted to be a facilitator. Fuck me. Whats that? Hill is a leader. We need a leader, even a flawed one in these times. I actually don’t think there is anyone in Townsville that could take Hill down.

      • Council worker says:

        A leader dosnt sack people who have years of experience just because they surport another political party. She isnt a leaders arsehole, you know why? Because shes got no respect from the staff. That’s everyone from every walk of life champ. Take it in now because I can see a by election coming.

        • Council worker says:

          And one final note, and i think im close to knowing who you are now because we’ve heard you talk before. Sacking 600 staff replaced with yes people. You know thats true that aint a lie. To then offer redundancies to evety worker in council as a means to get the numbers down to flash her 30 million saving??? Only trouble there is, as a council worker who knows, she gave put those redundancies to front line staff who then had to be replaced. What gain is that except a huge cost for nothing. You just mouthed off shit i never even talked about. Like i said gloat now because 500 million in debt accompanied with a WORLD economic downturn will defeat her not somone in Townsville. TCC isnt the state/fed it hasnt got the funds to rescue itself. It needs borrowing to survive. Its not happening yet but the unemployment and exodus in Townsville is coming. Who pays rates then?

          • Bean counter says:

            Your very wrong last drinks. Sam cox would be in the lead if it was a 2 horse race and climbing with 40% counted. So to say nobody can beat her is just wrong. Over 49% of people didnt vote for her. Thats fact and rising. Ice the cake as much as you like she hasnt won a majority. The numbers dont lie. There in lies the stupidity of the conservative vote. I hope the business community are happy now. Jenny hill is not liked in Townsville full stop. You cant campaign yourself out of that hole.

          • The Magpie says:

            Ummm, mate, ‘council worker’ replying to ‘council worker’? Do you mean Last Drinks?

      • Cantankerous but happy says:

        No, there is no one in Townsville who could be bothered trying to take Hill down, lots of work and money for a $230k a year gig, why the fuck would anyone bother, so they didn’t. Further to this the majority of people with the talent and $$ to run a campaign won’t be all that affected by Hills failure anyway, they can all just pack up and fuck off anytime they want and can invest in many other towns and cities. So the ones to really feel the pain of 4 more years of failure by Jenny Hill are the people that voted for her, all is as it should be.

      • Alahazbin says:

        LD, Liam Mooney worse luck!

      • Peter Sandery says:

        Well , Last Drinks if your analysis is true, it confirms what I have been saying for some time and that is the council, the State and the Commonwealth are rapidly now going down the road of failed state status, Corona virus not-withstanding. If you have not experience living in such a situation well you will really be shocked as not only will be no drinks we will be short of much else as well.

  21. Fishframe says:

    I still can’t believe more is not being said about the MV Artania docking here and letting passengers disembark around the CBD a couple of weeks ago. That’s after being turned away by Cairns and other Ports. Considering it is now sitting quarantined off Perth with a serious Covid-19 outbreak I am shocked it’s not being spoken about.

  22. Terry Who says:

    WTF Just looked at results so far (3pm Sun) and really looks hill & team just might be returned. I guess that proves the theory the community doesn’t want change during a disaster. It would have to be the only reason.

  23. Sadie says:

    Celine Schreiner has posted on bully Facebook page. She has congratulated herself, sorry I mean Jenny, on her election win, funny that she had gone so very quiet when people pointed out who everyone thought she really was.

    • The Magpie says:

      By coincidence, this afternoon, The ‘Pie has been advised by someone whose information has generally been good that Celine is not Lara Hill and the photo with child is not her Lara, either. The ‘Pie finds this strange.If someone had pointed this out with requisite proof, then the relevant comments would have been immediately withdrawn with an apology. But since no one did, right or wrong, the comments remain until they are refuted.

  24. Mickey Spillall says:

    Elections are choices. People get the option that is the least un-preferred. Voting systems can distort the size of victories, optional preferential / near first past the post systems create a winner’s dividend.

    The Hill option won because it was less un-preferred. Winning doesn’t mean it’s good, bad or indifferent. It simply says on the whole voters decided the others were less preferred.

    Why is that? Circumstances (eg Coronavirus) can contribute to a “no change is preferred” mood. That said, those opposed to City Hall failed to mount either an effective and credible critique on the one hand, and to offer an alternative worth voting for on the other.

    Cox was too slow off the mark. A few announcements here and there did not build a robust case for change. And that’s despite the fact the regional economy has been in a deep hole for a long long time. Dowling was a spoiler, no more no less. Opponents were tokenistic and complacent, too busy bad-mouthing the Mayor’s dress sense and basking in their own self righteousness.

    Worse, the So-called Opposition was lumbered with the drag on credibility known as TRRA. Pete Newey and his idiotic fantastical conspiracies tarred every critical word that one might want to mount against City Hall. His nonsense was rejected no more clearly than in Div 9 when young Liam Mooney smashed Trevor Elson …. left him for dead in fact.

    The big upside of this election is the rejection of Newey’s deluded nonsense deep in his targeted “heartland”. His coterie of back room backers should just quietly walk away in shame, or risk being named as co-conspirators.

    The second upside is a council with a couple of independent voices. In theory that’s a good thing. In practice, only time will tell.

    • The Magpie says:

      Think the short version of you’ve said is that some people win elections, others lose them.

    • AE 0 Days says:

      I believe, after hearing people complain, what worked in Hills favour, was that there were no how to vote cards. People didn’t know who the others were. And therefore, in times of change, people will go with what is familiar. And that is what they seem to have done.

      And it makes me feel sick, and worry greatly for this city, as that woman is an incompetent buffoon.

  25. The Magpie says:

    Moving right along, folks … here is a very well argued scenario, well worth the 3 minute read … debatable perhaps, but well laid out … explaining why Italy has been so hard hit by COVID-19. The piece also raises some rather interesting questions about growing Sino influence around the globe. Read and then just wait a nano-second until Peter Newey dons his tinfoil hat and declares COVID-19 a biological weapon of the Chinese aimed at global domination through economic collapse …. which it isn’t, or if it is, the Chinese have really fucked it up.


    • AE 0 Days says:

      This doesn’t explain why Spain has been so hard hit.

    • Fishframe says:

      The latest doomsday theory is that Covid-19 was developed in conjunction with 5G wireless. Apparently the 5G causes some sort of cellular disruption in the body which allows the Covid-19 to become more severe. True story, I am hearing this from people ! (N.b. I don’t believe it’s true, it’s true that I’ve heard it).

  26. Brain dead says:

    Considering the wages last we heard were $120k (Not taking into consideration the mayor and deputy mayor) in one day Townsville has managed to waste over $5 million dollars for the next 4 years.

    And don’t worry team while you’re all losing your jobs they will make sure they give themselves a nice pay rise at YOUR expense every year like they did for the last 4.

  27. Desperado, out riding fences says:

    Hello again Pie, I wonder if you can crack the 100 comments in a day before the clock ticks over to midnight. Lonely out here on the fence line, but the blog keeps me company from time to time.

    Keep up the good work!

    • The Magpie says:

      “Desperado, why don’t you come to your senses?
      Come down from your fences, open the gate
      It may be rainin’, but there’s a rainbow above you
      You better let somebody love you, before it’s too late.”

      • Desperado, out riding fences says:

        Hey, you’re singing my song there Pie! It’s a classic ain’t it!?

        See you are well on the way to a 100 today, good going, still keeping the bastards honest.

        Early start, gotta go now.

  28. Elusive Butterfly says:

    “Ignorant citizens elect ignorant leaders. It’s as simple as that” George Carlin.

  29. Dazza says:

    Notice the 2 qld by-elections didn’t swing much against the sitting govt as normally occurs. Deb Frecklington might be watching the kid very closely

  30. Big Poppa Pump says:

    Another 4 years of Sargent Hill wearing the purple doona and impersonating the Michelin man is a thought almost as unpalatable as Fatboy Clive and Flathead Dowling doing a naked Waltz. One can only hope that the CCC (who have already been fed a few crumbs) start to take a closer look at some of the complaints they have been fed about Team Hill.

  31. Jarred Tushner says:

    On a lighter note, yet still discussing politics, corruption and narcissism, I’ve been watching the Netflix series ‘Dirry Money’. The episode on the Tangerine Anus’s son-in-law, Jarred Kushner, is interesting but not surprising. It really goes to prove that most politicians, at all levels, are untouchable, corrupt grubs. And, you get what you vote for. As for Townsville, well you need to blame the people who voted Hill back in. 4 more years of the arseclown and it’s on all of each voters head. The V8 driving, doona wearing, baccy spitting, mullet cut Mayor is back, and she is going to make good on punishing her naysayers……

  32. Frequent flyer says:

    Like most on this blog I’m disappointed that we have to endure another 4 years of secrecy and sly looks from Jenny Hill. But life goes on and we have to continue to try to keep the bastards honest. I still have faith in what my parents told me long ago: “Be sure your sins will find you out.”
    Good luck, Jenny.

  33. The Magpie says:

    Normally, The ‘Pie doesn’t put this sort of stuff up, jokes and things, but hey, these aren’t normal times.

    A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose.

    A young student female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.
    “Nurse,”‘ he mumbles from behind the mask, “are my testicles black?”
    Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, “I don’t know, Sir. I’m only here to wash your upper body and feet.”

    He struggles to ask again, “Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?”
    Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and
    pulls back the covers.

    She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.
    She looks very closely and says, “There’s nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine.”

    The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly,
    “Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very,
    very, closely:
    “Are – my – test – results – back?”

  34. Mike Douglas says:

    Congratulations Pie again for creating some great content providing robust discussion and and futurist observations . Like you , you work with what Government is in power so four more years of the Mullet but odds on that it will unravel . It wouldnt be TRRA if there wasnt a conspiracy and the tin foil hats have gone full tilt claiming the Queensland Electoral Commission colluding on ballot boxes , transparency and of course China . Had to add “reds under the bed ” because TRRA believe China wrote the QEC,s program and were responsible for phone and internet problems leading up to election day . I suppose anything to try and shift the blame from the administrator who had some failed attempts at Council as well as being part of the NQSA bid . i dont think TRRA will have any issue complying with the latest Government conditions of two people gathering in a public place .

  35. Boomer says:

    I can’t believe the Election results. It really is time that non compulsory voting was bought in so all these dole bludging parasites can’t vote. This would mean that decent God fearing people would be elected instead of the rabble that we have now. Better still, stop giving the vote to greenies at all. You know that it makes sense.

    • The Magpie says:

      Ja wohl, mein Führer.

    • Eva Braun says:

      You do make some interesting comments as within our society we really do have quite a number of fucktards, ice-heads, partner bashing dross, and X-box addicted brainless houseo’s who wouldn’t know a political policy from a wince cask goon bag. These are the people padding out the voting numbers and contributing the return to power of some very ordinary, if not pathetic, representatives. Voting is a fine art and you need to be connected with your community and also understand what elected representatives can achieve if re-elected or what an incumbent is capable of if elected for the first time. If you life is spent smoking spliffs and stealing cars at night then your uneducated vote is really just a complete waste.

      • The Magpie says:

        You don’t seriously think the spiffing and car stealing crowd would flinch in the face a fine for not voting. Most of them are too young anyway.

  36. OWL says:

    Surprise surprise!! As soon as the pork barrel survey is over, the state government is going to get tough on the isolation rules. (Up to $13,000 fines)

  37. Bean counter says:

    By what information im reciving today from people watching the count, yes the mayor will be returned but has had a 25% swing against her. But final count might get bigger. The split vote did cost sam unfortunately but there is course for change there to be rid of her.

  38. Critical says:

    Hey Mullet now that you’re back in, forget about self congratulating yourself and provide decent up-to-date information and services to the Townsville Community.

    Bob Manning was re-elected as Mayor of Cairns and has wasted no time in providing an up-to-date comprehensive resource to the Cairns community on his Councils website. The link at the bottom of the media release takes you to the CRC Crovid-19 information.


    • ECQ says:

      Critical, brace yourself and take a look at TCC’s dashboard – disaster management section. V. similar to Cairns, launched last week.

      • Critical says:

        Oh hell, didn’t look at the Disaster Dashboard as I didn’t think that Crovid-19 episode in Qld had been declared a disaster. Similar information but not as informative comprehensive, easy to read or up-to-date as many areas haven’t been updated with last night’s changes made the National Cabinet.

  39. Cuz says:

    Ya reckon when the Cows fold we can use the new stadium for greyhounds or trots?

    • Achilles says:

      Not a chance, it will be renamed Circus Hillseum, there will only be V8 races, blood sports and calisthenics, all overseen by Caesaris Julia in her purple toga, her mullet adorned with Laurel lies, graciously accepting the praise from the plebeian hoard.

      The plebs from Urbania Hill (formally Townsville) will be treated to “party” games for a full 4 years, unless a determined Cassius, Convenes a Court.

  40. Guy says:

    The three ways to fix Australian democracy

    Get rid of compulsory voting

    Get rid of preferential voting

    Introduce voting only with ID

    In this council election jenny would have still won regardless. I feel Sam Cox was wasting his time, he was correct to focus on his existing employment rather than some wild goose chase known as council elections.

    • Boomer says:

      Also, only voting booths in specific suburbs.

    • Eva Braun says:

      Guy, you are a tosser. Sam didn’t waste his time. He had a full time job and was limited by funds and resources. Hill had all the time in the world (remember, Councillors don’t do any work, it is the Council staff who do everything) and she has political connections formed in Brisbane. A large advantage. Plus Sam had a go, it’s all you can do. Sam now has time on his hands to reflect, look for ways to improve, and adjust his game plan moving toward. I’m sure he will get a chance before 4 years are up as some of the current shonks will likely ‘retire to spend more time with family’ or be jailed once the CCC finally gets cracking on TCC. A 25% swing against the purple doona is proof that many are pissed off with her. It just wasn’t a big enough swing to give her the boot.

      • Guy says:

        Don’t get me wrong, anyone standing for election in a genuine way should be applauded. Sam probably knew deep down he was probably just wasting his time. On this liberal orientated blog he didn’t exactly get an easy ride. I didn’t see any real commentary from many people (if at all) about how they were going to help – go figure. the fact is jenny hill won the election and you’ll need to accept that. If people get tired of their council they will get rid of them.

        • The Magpie says:

          Haven’t noticed anywhere that the result has not been accepted. Now the eternal vigilance must continue.

        • Alahazbin says:

          Guy, Is that the same as the rest of Australia getting over ScoMo’s win. The vitriol is never ending.

    • Steve, Belgian Gardens says:

      How about instead of all those undemocratic changes, you simply attempt to persuade a majority of the electorate to vote for your candidate, party or policy preferences?

  41. InsatiableQ says:

    Hi Magpie
    Have been following this column for a while but have to have my say on this subject. In my opinion, Madam did not win this election. Cox lost this election to the Vote 1 campaign which lazy people prefer as they don’t have to count past one. In this way, all those people killed off any preferences getting Cox or any other over the line. Last time she got over the line due to so-called independents giving her their preferences. She has very clever minders.

    • ECQ says:

      InsatiableQ, I don’t understand your point about last time (2016) Jenny Hill got in because so-called independents gave her their preferences. Hill got an easy majority of first preference votes.

      HANKIN, William 3,237 3.3%

      PATEL, Harry 1,970 1.99%

      HILL, Jenny 58,862 59.5%

      ARLETT, Jayne 34,849 35.2%

  42. Russell says:

    Lots of comments about Team Hill getting back, in full it seems – and congratulations must go to them. Obviously the “Team Hill Machine” is very good at winning elections.
    What is very different going into the future though, is that the man who has been driving the show for many years now has left town, and one assumes will not be interested in directing proceedings from afar.
    I think we have an interesting couple of years coming up, with or without CCC input.

  43. Last Drinks says:

    Beautiful day today.
    Jenny won, or Sam lost. Or Greg and Clive stuffed it up for Sam. Its the end of the world. The CCC will right things or not. Council Worker ( oxymoron alert ) will blow the whistle or not. Magpie gets 4 year tenure as rabid opposition to TEL, Team Hill and The Murdoch Rag. Save time Magpie. Have previous blogs on permanent cycle. More golf that way.
    Neo Nazis now posting. Inevitable really.
    Meanwhile in the real world, self isolating is the go. That must mean that the many followers of Onan on here will be kept busy. Sadly, I am stuck at work, gently passing time until I am struck down by the virus and washed from this earth.
    Stay well fellow contributors. Vent your spleen if you wish. If you want to find true inner peace. Repeat after me.
    It is all Scomos fault. Omm

    • Council worker says:

      That means jenny isn’t happy her workers are talking about her if youve mentioned me. Good things come to those who wait. As bean counter said, over 52% now dont want her. There isn’t 48% labor in Townsville thats for sure. The rest of my crew are laughing our arse off at you. We’ve seen your knid since mike Reynolds was mayor.

    • Mundingbird says:

      LD,you are fuckin Nuts !

  44. Cantankerous but happy says:

    This corona thing might well and truly fuck Foxtel, after waiting an hour to get through on the phone I was still over an hour from the front of the queue, so I hung up. There is no provision to cancel your service online you have to call, then today an email saying not to call unless you are suffering hardships, as they can’t take calls. So what they have done is effectively tell customers, you have no choice but to keep paying us, despite not having one fucking second of live sport to watch, got to give it to News Corp, always finding a new low to sink to.

  45. Hee Haw says:

    Now call me stupid, many have before, and bear in mind these are statistics not trends but…..if as the QEC website states (@14:00 Monday ) that Jenny hill has 49% of the votes counted and the count is sitting @32% of the total then so far Jenny Hill has 16% of the votes available when all counted how can she claim a victory “without and postal votes” according to the Bully. Don’t get me wrong I think the trend will continue but 16% is not a winning margin to me

  46. One legged tap dancer says:

    Its not only Foxtel that is pulling the “don’t call us” trick.
    Try getting in touch with Webjet to change or cancel a booking. You get a voice message telling you that their call centre in the Philippines has closed due to COVID-19 so they can’t take calls. So you try to email but you wait for weeks because they’re so busy they don’t have time for you.
    Then when you finally do get a reply they tell you that you can’t get a refund, only a “travel credit”, despite the booking conditions providing for a full refund (on business class flights).
    Shonky, and a sign that Webjet may not be with us for much longer.

  47. Astonished says:

    Here’s another reason Jenny Hill won.
    Channel 7 News gave her saturation coverage, even getting her to comment on stories she and the council had nothing to do with.
    On one night she was in 5 stories, and regularly was in 3 or 4.
    Meanwhile, Sam Cox and the other candidates were basically ignored.
    And they have the cheek to call themselves a news service.
    As for poor old Rupert doing it hard because of Foxtel’s lack of sports coverage, he’s copping the pineapple with his newspapers too – virtually no money spinning real estate, no ads for pubs, clubs and restaurants, no travel advertising, no job ads…..
    He did get a windfall from the Townsville election, thanks to Clive and Jenny, but that’s a drop in the bucket compared to the losses throughout his network of newspapers.
    Expect more job cuts at the Bully, especially well paid senior reporters.

  48. The Magpie says:

    Always remember, there’s someone worse off than you.

  49. Racing tragic says:

    Oh dear , the Townsville turf club finds more trouble –
    friends in Brisbane claim there are rumours that TCC has recently lost most paying sponsors ( the real ones that pay , not the friends of the committee that get free sponsorship).
    The committee is considering placing the club into receivership again.
    Tip: if you are owed money, go and collect before 3/4/2020.

  50. Cantankerous but happy says:

    How is the form of channel seven news, they run a story on Monday night, that golf courses have reopened , that actually happened Thursday, but earlier on the day they report the story, the courses have actually all been closed again, I guess we might see that on Friday, hopeless dickheads,

  51. Jenny from the block says:

    Put the champagne on ice Jenny. Team Mullet will be working overtime to get Townsville back on track after a few years of downturn, $500m in debt, the COVID-19 impact, the remnants of the disastrous flood and the CCC sniffing something godly awful in TCC. Add to that your protector, Anna Alphabet and Lt Trad will be out on their collective arses come the state election, plus you will have people like Sam Cox in the wind watching and waiting. To top it off – 4 more years of The Magpie!!! So buckle in Doona girl, it’s goi g to a rough, scrutinised, well reported on ride….

    • Critical says:

      Will Mullet use the Crovid-19 and it’s impact upon the TCC budget as a reason to raise rates and other charges?
      Of course it will be a smoke and mirrors game of cost shifting and complex dodgy accounting maneuvers, figures and pretty graphs and 100% not transparent and will aim to get her out of the economic mess that she has put the TCC budget in.

  52. Race 1, Horse 7 - Jenny’s girl says:

    Oh dear, the Townsville Turd Club in trouble……again! Don’t worry, Mayor Hill and her team of advisors will surely be able to assist with this issue. Not.

  53. One legged tap dancer says:

    It took Jenny Hill no time at all – a world record minus period of time in fact – to break all of her election promises.
    Even before she has been declared the winner in the mayoral election race (Sam Cox hasn’t conceded defeat yet and I don’t blame him), she was on Channel 7 tv last night (Monday) saying (with a heavy heart and her trademark smirk) that she wouldn’t be able to keep all her election promises because of COVID-19.
    Wouldn’t that be because you’ve already run up a debt of close to $600 million (and that’s only what she’s told us about)?
    You can bet that in four years time the debt will be around $900 million (unless the CCC steps in or an administrator is appointed) and the bogans will vote her in again, with a mission to completely send Townsville bankrupt.
    You out there Last Drinks, or are you getting pissed with your pal Jenny?
    Hope you’re keeping social distance – for your sake.

    • Cantankerous but happy says:

      Yep, absolute basket case of an economy and going to get worse, the debt will kill Townsville and with the current environment prohibiting eviction from landlords, and power companies not being able to cut off people’s power one would assume councils will also not be able to sell properties for unpaid rates. I have often said Townsville could be Australia’s first failed city, and we get closer everyday.

  54. The Magpie says:

    Brilliant … and accurate. American hero Dr Fauci puts it to music.

  55. KaBooma says:

    Not only am I already of that despised demographic – a white, old(ish), self funded retiree, invested in residential property – it appears that the government has not only once again declined to include arseholes like me in its latest round of largesse. Three out of the five tenants have already given notice that they are not paying rent – none have provided proof that they have been effected by Covid-19. The other two were already suckling on the public teat, but the agent says that they, too, sought to avoid paying rent until being set to rights. A goodly part of my income disappears, but mortgage obligations do not. I am now little better off, income-wise, than your average old age pensioner. Sorry if I’m typing too loudly, but the deafening noise we all are hearing is the sound of our property values crashing. Negative equity here we come (thank God for negative gearing – fat lot of good it does if you have no taxable income)

    Oh, well, I’ll just sit back, sip my tea and watch us slip into socialism. You’re a fool if you think government will ever relinquish its new found control over our personal lives.

    Rant over. Oh, one more thing..memo Last Drinks…ScoMo won the election, so get over it you little turd.

    • Last Drinks says:

      He did win. It’s still his fault.

    • Cantankerous but happy says:

      Pay it forward then, don’t pay the bank loan, don’t pay the council rates, don’t fix anything that breaks, don’t pay any applicable body corporate fees. Out of all the good things this Govt has done with Covid19 the no eviction one was a real brain fart. If it’s good enough for business to have to prove a 30% drop in income then so should tenants, and a payment plan has to be put forward, this was always going to be abused by the ferals and make it harder for those in genuine need.

      • Mike Douglas says:

        Spot on Cankers , landlord with 5 rentals has had agent inform him that all five have advised they wont be paying rent . If a tenant moves out 3 mths into the 6 mth moratorium how does the landlord get his 3 mths rent ? . Cba have had 125,000 home loan owners apply for non payment more phone calls in two weeks than they normally get in a year. Lets not forget the banks are adding interest during “non payment ” . Many of these people havnt been stood down but the phobia of possibly is driving caution and building cashflow . Other than 6 mil Australians unemployed , and those who qualify for the $750 stimulus payment not too many other Australians will be spending . Perhaps closing the Pokies down will stop millions $ being flushed thru but im sure they will find other avenues to spend the $ .

    • BIG TURD says:

      Errr Booma, I think LD might actually be a BIG turd, not a little turd as you say; a little turd wouldn’t be able to pound out such stuff on the keyboard and post it.

      A guess, but I think it’s right Booma.

  56. Bentley says:

    This is not a criticism of the CVirus response. It’s a heads up. My better half and I had to do some shopping today and hopefully get some much needed exercise. We also felt the need to chill as being cooped up increases my chances of a thorough thrashing whenever I exhibit thoughtlessness, which it appears is frequently.
    So we drove to the Strand with a couple of comfortable folding chairs, a book each, and bought coffee. The plan was to read, walk, read, have some takeaway, walk etc.
    Sound good? You bet. A beautiful day, complete with cool sea-breeze, feeling good.
    Not another soul within 15.05m. Not, that is, until an articulate well mannered young police officer stopped his pushbike 2.55m upwind of me in a 10k sea-breeze and explained that one should not leave home to read. It was not a legitimate reason to leave home, and in so doing I was breaking the rules. To his credit, when I explained our proposed exercise program and our intention to implement same after a bite to eat, he did appear to understand, as long as we did not read. He may have felt a little unsure of his ground for when he rode off he appeared to consult with another three officers.
    The heads up therefore is that reading on public space is not on unless you are simultaneously excercising . Nor is sunbathing. Don’t know about fishing. Sailing should be OK as it is, to varying degrees, exercise.
    I take my hat off to the boys and girls in blue though, and not once did I call any
    of them ‘Sonny’.

    • Last Drinks says:

      Burning books should be ok. Fishing is definitely ok.

      • The Magpie says:

        AH HA! The Freudian slip of someone with fascist leanings, ‘burning books’ indeed. Perhaps you meant ‘reading’?

        • Last Drinks says:

          No Freudian slip. A comment on the times. Police clamping down on any activity in a public place does mirror a certain time back when you were a teenager. Merely a joke Old Bird. I mean, could you have imagined a year ago that you could get into trouble with the Police for reading at the beach?

        • George says:

          The fascists burn, the marxists simply alter.

          • The Magpie says:

            And the Islamist’s burn the author … or try to … just ask Salman Rushdie.
            Mayor Mullet’s got the right idea … just cook the books and then hide ‘em.

  57. One legged tap dancer says:

    Last Drinks (the name says it all – tossed out at closing time) seems to be avoiding even thinking about his mate Jenny’s $600 million debt. Is it all too hard mate?
    Seems the dregs drinker is very selective in what he puts up as positives for another four years of Hillmania.
    Meanwhile we ratepayers have to sit at home and cop the pineapple.
    So Last Drinks, do you actually contribute by paying rates and/or taxes, or are you just another Labor bludger.
    Just asking.

  58. Tin Foil Hat says:

    As the count unfolds it’s clear that anything to do with Peter Newey and his so-called TRRA is a political irrelevance. The poor old well intentioned folk at NQSA were rejected. In some of the Divisions the results were an embarrassment.

    In Division 1, where Newey has been talking up his conspiracies about Chinese this and that, not to mention his ill informed campaign for poor old Mr Jepson, the NQSA candidate polled a whopping 8%.

    Aside from NQSA in Division 9 Newey’s favourite poodle Trevor Elson polled less than 9%. Newey was personally on the hustings with Elson since mid last year.

    The Town can smell Madness from a Million Miles and that’s exactly what happened to Newey and his ever diminishing band of associates. And so he’s predictably cry foul about more conspiracies involving (yep, you guessed it) the Chinese (computer systems this time) and the Electoral Commission. If ever people needed confirmation of his irrelevance and nonsense, this latest move is it.

    I hope Peter and those who might see something in his rantings reads this. I won’t post on his FB as I don’t want to counter as a Member of his non-existent Association. The message is loud and clear: you’re irrelevant and the town has sent you a clear message.

    The place needs serious people with real world relevance to deal with the challenges ahead. Pete, you’re a laughing stock and an embarrassment to yourself and sadly to the city.

  59. The Stasi says:

    You there MAYOR MULLET, we’re watching you very closely. OPEN, ACCOUNTABLE AND TRANSPARENT (eg What EXACTLY is the TCC current financial position?).

    • The Magpie says:

      One greatly suspects that the true position will be blurred, mutated and whitewashed through the magic of the Voodoo Virus Economics. In fact, you can bet on it (when the TAB re-opens).

  60. J.B says:

    Could this be trouble for one of the mayors propaganda machines?
    News Corp stops printing 60 mastheads

    • The Magpie says:

      On a serious note, that is highly unlikely, at least on a permanent basis, as is the case with some other smaller regionals. The investment in the print hall and all the ancillary printing work it does would mitigate against it.

      And is now the time for some checks and balances at the Astonisher? The Magpie has certainly been critical of the paper (and then some), and the paper has found that more than uncomfortable because of a now out-dated arrogance when they were the sole gatekeepers to information, true or fake. BUT I HAVE NEVER WANTED TO SEE THE DEMISE OF THE TOWNSVILLE BULLETIN, JUST A RETURN TO UNBIASED, BALANCED REPORTING FREE OF COMMERCIAL INTERESTS. There is emerging evidence that a small measure of this traditional tenet of journalism is happening. It is a vital role in any community that has been distorted in Townsville by myriad News Ltd interests and unwise influences outside the paper.

      A newspaper’s role in any community is a bellwether of a healthy community, and this city needs an ethically revitalised Townsville Bulletin more than ever, ditching the false hope, happy clapping credibility-destroying rubbish that has become a hallmark in past years. Sometimes the bias has been appalling.

      Indeed, the Townsville Bulletin and News OWE IT to this to community and region to adopt a more ethical editorial policy, since it’s wrong-headed and venal policies of the past few years have been partly instrumental in our economic and governance demise. And it’s own.

      • Fishframe says:

        I agree. But we never really thought GM would totally close the Holden brand either.

      • Rupert says:

        The printing rooms will shut when Rupert shuffles off this earth…

        • The Magpie says:

          Great ratioinalisation, since noine of the off-spring have the ink of Rupert running their veins. He did once truly love newspapers for their content and not their ‘rivers of gold’, which are now drought stricken trickles.

  61. Russell says:

    Further to my comment responding to “Lies” last week, I have indeed been keeping my own spreadsheet of Copvid-19 New and Total cases from the Queensland Health website. It becomes obvious early on that the “Total Infections to Date” column is simply a nonsense – probably designed to frighten I suspect.
    I have therefore “contacted” Queensland Health via their web page, suggesting it might be time to start subtracting the people who have actually recovered, thereby showing number currently testing positive, which will be a much smaller number and much more representative of where things are at.
    I would like to invite other bloggers to do the same. Together we might start to get some sanity back into this unfortunate situation.

    • Lies says:

      Spot on Russell, more misinformation than information. Do not expect a response from QH.

      The numbers are not absolute, as there is arse covering everywhere, and people running different agendas. Draw you own conclusions here but be cautious. Nobody has checked inputs or sensitivities used for the models.

      Remember this is an infectious disease that kills people with comorbidity, and only in a few very rare instances it will have severe impacts on healthy people, ergo no impact on the health system. Many cases will not be reported as people will not know they have it or have had it, but they will build immunity.

      The truth is Federal and State Governments have known for nearly 10 years the health system runs at capacity year on year, with no game changing investment, we build stadiums rather than hospitals. They have known about pandemic impacts too https://www1.health.gov.au/internet/main/publishing.nsf/Content/519F9392797E2DDCCA257D47001B9948/$File/Impact.pdf

      Only a very few are considering whole cycle impacts, a blog maintained by seven scientists working on Global Food, Environment and Economic Dynamics has calculated that COVID-19 restriction in China has likely has saved the lives of 4,000 kids under 5 and 73,000 adults over 70 in China http://www.g-feed.com/2020/03/covid-19-reduces-economic-activity.html. We will expect a dramatic reduction in other infectious diseases in Australia this season due to current controls.

      Australia in an island and once case of international origin are controlled (16 days) with strict surveillance, severity will be well within current health system capacities. Economic activity can be restarted within our borders only excl international air travel. This will leapfrog every other country.

      Here’s one for the foil hat community. Ever wonder why the ANZ Bank participated in Event 201 in October last year that simulated an outbreak of a novel zoonotic coronavirus transmitted to people leading to a severe pandemic. Thttp://www.centerforhealthsecurity.org/event201/scenario.html

    • The Magpie says:

      Have you noticed that, without doing any subtractions, all information in the area of recoveries is described as ‘totally’ recovered? So some can be ‘partially’ recovered, ‘lingering’ or perhaps ‘undecided’?

  62. 1 April says:

    Mayor Mullet has just released a statement assuring the Townsville public that, from today forward, she commits to honesty, complete TTC transparency and total accountability to the Townsville ratepayer.

    She has further committed to never waste ratepayer or council funds on anything, ever again.

  63. The Stasi says:

    Anyone see an issue here? Just cruising around the Qld Electoral Vote count.

    According to the detail, Palm Island has a total of 897 registered voters. They have counted around 65% plus of the votes cast and that, according to the website equates to 2,159 votes counted???

    • Fishframe says:

      People over 30 are worth 2 votes and those over 50 are 3.5 votes. Maybe…..

    • ECQ says:

      Stasi, Palm Island council is an Undivided Council for the purposes of the 2020 Local Government Elections. There are 4 Councillors to be elected at large for this council, in addition to the Mayor. There are no internal boundaries (Divisions) for this council. Different from Townsville, Palm Island uses a First Past the Post voting system to elect councillors so a voter had to select no more than four favoured candidates from a list of 15. So if everyone gets it right there should be 897 X 4 (3,588) votes cast. The different voting methods in Queensland are all mentioned on the same page as the results.

      • The Magpie says:

        Surely it would be that the 15 are named on the one ballot and four names ticked = 897?

        • ECQ says:

          Mr Magpie, if you look at the electoral commission site for Palm Island you will see that there are 897 electors on the electoral roll – compared to 128,601 in Townsville. At Palm Island the vote for mayor is the same as Townsville – optional preferential voting. But the vote for councillors is different from Townsville – it’s First Past the Post. On the councillor ballot paper (as distinct from the mayoral ballot paper) there were fifteen (15) names and each voter was invited to put a number from 1-4 against the name of their four preferred candidates, and no more than four. So for each voter there was a likelihood of four votes being cast for councillor. That is – each of the 897 voters would or could cast four votes. If you look at the actual score card emerging for Palm Island it’s perfectly clear what is happening. The Stasi raised this matter – do they get it?

      • Fishframe says:

        Stasi, that makes sense. Thanks.

    • Fishframe says:

      Are there more primary votes allowed for councillors then mayors? Because at 67% counted the Mayors total votes are about 611. Why are Councillors over 2,000 at a similar 61%?

    • Fishframe says:

      Charters Towers is even worse – 5,000 Vs 30,000 !!

  64. Non Aligned Worker says:

    I haven’t heard anything re the rumour about the CEO resignation.

  65. Dave of Kelso says:

    The bloody Chinese just cannot help themselves. After giving the world Cv19 now it is counterfeit medical masks. 800,000 seized by Aust Border Force. 600,000 seized by the Dutch. These are the pricks that want to deliver our next communications 5 g network. PIG’S ARSE!


  66. The Magpie says:

    Of course, Labor will blame the Rex airline’s right wing for this.

    • AvGas says:

      Oh no, there goes some more of QAL’s profits from Townsville Airport. Gill must be shitting himself watching those precious landing fees disappearing. Let me see, oh yes, we are in April aren’t we, well I guess they will be jacking up car parking fees come July 1.

    • The Stasi says:

      What are you PROPosing here Mr Magpie?

  67. The Magpie says:

    We have all know that Peter Newey lives in lalaland and is prone to just making stuff up. His latest bit of fabrication is that the electoral commission’s computer system is Chinese. It’s not. Here’s a story about the decision made in 2018 to replace the old system with one by a company called Kennech.



    • The Illuminati says:

      Pete Newey has worn tinfoil hats daily for many many years. I’m sure he believes that David Icke is Jesus Christ and I’m sure he must believe that the Mullet is reptilian. Some of his musings are legendary around Townsville and I wouldn’t mind betting that he believes the earth is flat. The man is a freak.

      • Mike Douglas says:

        Illumanti , Peter Newey hiding behind TRRA facebook page spewing out his own xenophobic and illinformed views says the page is for residents and ratepayers but a simple look says the number of comments on his last post , 22 vs what you can read 14 says he has deleted 8 and the yet he has the gall to attack Government and individuals on transparency . If you read TRRA,s so called Charter he is also in breach on so many items yet Bluewater airport (pitch for Qantas training academy) / NQSA get aligned with him to their detriment . Based on recent court rulings on facebook pages and comments its only a matter of time which is also a concern for a few of his hapless followers who are stupid enough to make defamatory comments using their real names .

        • Arthur Itis says:

          Mike, FYI and others.
          Newey’s puppet master Cameron Richards might be worth a crack at suing, poverty safeguards probably don’t apply given his history. Check out “Aussie Watchdogs” on facebook (Rort of the Week).

        • Fishframe says:

          I don’t disagree with what you say. My only concern is that many of TRRA’s stories directly name people who are well known to be quick to litigate the pants off their grandmother. For some reason there seems to be no litigation, no defamation cases and no removal of posts even after many months. Is it a case of ‘where there’s smoke, there’s fire’?

          • The Magpie says:

            No it is evidence of irrelevance. Although Newey’s ‘boast’ that he can’t be sued because he has no money, those who he claims are members of the TRRA no doubt do, and they could well be party to any action, but why give him oxygen, he is regarded as a doddering old galoot. But Newey’s hypocrisy is starting to show. Might have to have a chat about that in the bloig this weekend.

      • Peak hysteria says:

        The reptilian Illuminati are our overlords and masters (Rockefellers, Rothschilds, Murdochs and Royals). The Mullet isn’t quite in their league – yet!

      • Non Aligned Worker says:

        Mullet is not reptilian. Almost certainly a shape shifter. Definitely not a Grey.

    • Guy says:

      For what its worth I woukd get rid of the ECQ and just pay Australia Post to run the elections.

      You turn up at the post office and cast your ballot there – like collecting a parcel , you must show ID to verify who you are. The pre poll period extends for 3 months so people drift in any where in QLD , the post office just keeps a steel box, padlocked with a security measure around it where ballots are thrown.

      No more cost to the tax payer to run this organisation.

      Because the ballot casting is over three months few people would have a reason not to vote in person.

      The great thing is if you got rid of compulsory voting no one would care if you voted or not. Showing a bonifide drivers licence would be necessary unless you think Australia post is some fascistic regime for daring to confirm your identity.

      • The (Barely) Civil Engineer says:

        If Aust Post ran the election, half the votes would be returned to sender, another quarter delivered to random people around the country, and the rest “lost in transit”.

        At least with the gubment running the poll we have someone to be angry at – Aust Post simply do not give a flying feck.

      • Cantankerous but happy says:

        Not the dumbest idea I have heard Guy, but fairly close, have you ever tried to collect a parcel from Aust Post, it’s a cut lunch and book whilst you stand in line it takes that long, the slowest pack of human beings to inhabit the earth. The only time they ever move faster than sloth speed is when putting up the “ this counter closed” sign, which is done lightning fast but everything else is a crawl, so your 3 month pre poll would need to be at least a year, life would be one long election.

        • Guy says:

          believe it or not Australia Post is actually a very successful company – google it

          • The Magpie says:

            Hmmm, not quite as successful as you’d expect a ‘monopoly’ to be. Those areas of operation where AP is commercially challenged – particularly parcel freight – have shown that the bureaucratic structure inherited from the government isn’t flexible enough to allow strong competition.

  68. Frequent flyer says:

    Townsville Council is now giving advice on COVID-19 with a you beaut help desk.
    What are the chances of Jenny Hill paying Jamie Durie and AEC another $800,000 to run a COVID-19 public awareness campaign?

    • Dutch Oven says:

      Durie could run the covid-19 show from the now defunct Toilet Bowl in the CBD. Of course the whole thing would need to be flooded and made underwater to ensure it’s dazzling success.

  69. Dutch Reverend says:

    I noticed yesterday that all the signage in the Townsville Airport bragging about all the improvements they will be making for the benefit of Townsville is no longer on display. Mustn’t be going to happen I’d say. What a surprise.

    • The Stasi says:

      Why would that be a surprise to you Reverend? No funds coming in, no funds to do the work! Do you get it stupid?

      • L Berry says:

        Since when were they going to use their own money?

      • Jatzcrackers says:

        Stasi, I’m not really sure how long you’ve been around, however you’re becoming a little been condescending and outright bloody rude. Are you a ‘disrupter’ or just a frustrated facilitator ! Either way, a bit of common courtesy may assist your outlook in this life. Perhaps a little self reflection may assist the chaffing buttocks of your life !

      • Dutch Reverend says:

        Stasi, I’m not stupid, my point is that why would all the signage be painted over / removed if it was going to happen in the future. I would think any level headed person would understand that the renovations would not be going ahead under the current circumstances. Point is, it was never going to happen anyway.

        • The Magpie says:

          As Jim Trott says in The Vicar of Dibley ‘yes, yes, no.’ tes to the first two points, no to the last.
          ‘Never going to happen anyway’. Then is QAL going to return the Commonwealth money – $50m by memory – already given for the upgrades?

        • The Stasi says:

          Rev, how do you KNOW it was never going to happen? FACTS please. Don’t bother answering if you don’t actually KNOW.

    • I’ll be plucked says:

      Wouldn’t this ‘quiet time’ be a good opportunity to get started on a project, with hardly any disruption to the flying public? There should be plenty of tradies around looking for the work………just a thought.

      Plenty of govt help around too, to help keep everyone going, including the airport owners/operators.

  70. Achilles says:

    Doctors are proposing the government release “asylum seekers” and refugees out of their current containment.


    They should stick to medicine and drop the poorly disguised bullshit of their loony left brigade.

    These are the same deceitful crowd who deliberately lied about the condition of many on Manos and Nauru, just to stand out as the pompous loony lefty mob that has hi-jacked the medical elite over recent years.

  71. Kingswood says:

    Look on the bright side people, we’ve finally got the extinction rebellion mob off the streets….

    • Dave of Kelso says:

      In fairness to the lab rats, suggest the extinction rebellion mob be used for the early testing of the Cv19 vaccine.

      • OWL says:

        I wonder how many of the “anti-vaxxers” will refuse Covid vaccination when it eventually becomes available?

        • The Magpie says:

          In fact, that could be a very real development, where the authorities declare such actions are mandatory in the interests of public safety (like all current voluntary vaccinations are). How that is handled would be most interesting …. in a so-called democratic society.

          • The (Barely) Civil Engineer says:

            The unvaccinated get their own patch of paradise somewhere – perhaps an island with a festive name or a lovely desert view – and live out their days in splendid isolation. I for one won’t cry a river of tears.

          • NQ Gal says:

            I think there will be plenty of cruise ships to hold the Anti-vax mob.

      • Arthur Itis says:

        Good point Kingswood, DOK. They should use them in phase one of the testing, then move to testing on the ferrets. This should fit quite nicely within PETAphile guidelines on reducing harm to animals, win; win. Seems they have always had their arse where their mouth is…..except now!

  72. Happy days says:

    The newspaper delivery person has finally worked out where my driveway is and the paper has landed there two days in a row! So much better than the pre-dawn fossicking through the climbing roses that has happened for the last 9 months.

  73. Arthur Itis says:

    Just in:
    #11 – Do not Covid thy neighbour!

  74. I’ll be plucked says:

    Hey Bing, you still out there? We haven’t heard from you for a while old mate.

  75. Kenny Kennett says:

    We need to give credit where it’s due. Congratulations TEL for keeping the majority of Cruise ships away from our shores with your second rate tourism marketing plan. Your shabbily planned unattractive approach has saved thousands of North Queenslanders from catching COVID19. Imagine the good you could do with half the money you waste.
    And I bet they’re all still on full pay!

    • The Stockman says:

      C’mon Kenny, there’s:
      – the completely dilapidated Reef HQ (Headquarters of most awfully maintained tourism attraction on the planet)
      – Magnetic Island (not much to do there when you’re a 70 year old cruise ship passenger)
      – Underwater Fart Museum (unfortunately cruise passengers aren’t allowed to dive – too risky).

      Now what on earth are you complaining about?

  76. Dave of Kelso says:

    Pie, some time back you asked for any up-sides to Cv19. Noticed one today. The hand baskets in Woolies are, for the first time in my memory, are all sparkling clean. I wonder how long it will last when this Cv19 matter is done with?

    • The Magpie says:

      Yup, noted the same thing in Coles yesterday. In answer to your question, reckon it is likely that some measure of wipe-down will now be permanent, because it has taken COVID-19 to highlight the fact that supermarket trolleys are a discount store of other infectious, pass-on ailments, and not all shoppers have responsible and thoughtful hygiene habits.

  77. The Magpie says:

    This goes right to the heart of the News Ltd venality.

    It poses as a news story, talking about small newspapers closing down around the country, but then morphs into a virtue-signalling twisted advertisement for more subscribers. It also makes the claim that the Bulletin’s advertising revenue has been hit … making it sound like the paper will manfully face this inconvenience not of their own making. But has that revenue fallen? No, judging by the full page government ads, and the corporate deodorising messages aimed at taking some of the stink off their day to day operations over the years (yes, banks, we’re looking at you).

    The paper is making a motza out of this, and then has. the rank audacity to go into full-blown wheedle mode for more subscribers.

    • Mundingbird says:

      Pie,this gives me the shits.I have not bought this pathetic excuse for a paper for probably 3 years now.Masking an issue into an add,how does piss off sound.I am a bit sensitive at the moment as I had to lay off 3 staff this week.

  78. Elusive Butterfly says:

    Mr. Pie…the weekend photographer from the Gympie Times, who has taken 22 years to become the Townsville Bulletin Editor (it’s unbelievable how News Ltd. takes the piss and appoints such talentless people to, probably, the city’s premier media position), has shown his lack of journalistic prowess already.
    Remember Pie, one old journo to another…check, check, check, and then, check again!!
    His last par in that pathetic piece of self-deprecating prose states…
    “If you want a paper delivered as well, it’s just a $1 a day for print and full digital access, for the first 28 days.” That’s $28.
    And yet News Ltd. marketing info, as below, shows that it is only a dollar for the first 28 days, not $28.


    Pay now:
    $1 for the first 28 days (min. cost)
    Then $30 billed every 4 weeks1
    Change selection

    And he has already commented on our young, indigenous problems after being here for five minutes.

    Strap yaselves in. The Bully entertainment is only gonna get better!!

    • The Magpie says:

      Well, we all know the Astonisher long and hilarious history with maths, god bless ‘em. But EVEN IF what iditor Warhurst says is correct – $28 for the first 28 days, it then makes the massive jump to $30 PER MONTH … which is either 30 or 31 days. Then the generosity would be overwhelming if it wasn’t so non-existent. But no, our new goof wasn’t saved by his trailer wheels this time, the paper’s proud self-isolation from facts started long before any bloody virus came along.

  79. Elusive Butterfly says:

    A North QLD online newspaper looks better everyday!!

  80. Elusive Butterfly says:

    Question ScoMo: Is a menage a trois illegal??

  81. Mark McGregor says:

    What email can I send a photo to? It shows the wonder of Murdoch papers.

  82. J.B says:

    link broken? page not found on this weeks blog

  83. Strand Ghost says:

    Hi Magpie
    I see today the Federal and NSW Government has said that they have had no contact with the NRL about restarting comp for over a month and ever Qld health minister Steven (no more Miles) has criticised the NRL about commencement date yet Our beloved Mayor Jenny the Dill Hill has been reported in the Bulletin as having been in discussions with the NRL about kicking the game off here, WTF is she on? she seems to know more about what’s going on than all the Government’s.
    I found it hard to believe the Crap that keeps getting printed in Bully with her smiling face attached, gee she must keep getting these editor’s in her pocket pretty quick.

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