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The Magpie

Saturday, June 16th, 2018   |   96 comments

Oh, That Flapping Sound During The Week, You Ask? Just Jenny Hill’s Chickens Coming Home To Roost.

Slowly, slowly, it is all unravelling for Jenny Hill, but this week, she copped multiple hits, challenges and was forced into a humiliating backdown. The ‘Pie compiles the list.

And what’s this … seems some councillors have visited the spine doctor for a backbone transplant, and have challenged one of the mayor’s most cherished political prerogatives.

A surprising admission by the federal member for Herbert … seems The Tool needs our sympathy, not our scorn …

And Bentley’s back chirpy and chipper as ever after his overseas sojourn.

So let’s go right there.

Those Who Don’t Know History Are Bound To Repeat It

It was more a meaningless trough than an enlightening summit, but this week, the world’s eyes were on Singapore and that hairdressers’ nightmare of a meeting between two of the world’s most dishonest and unstable leaders. But they had more than that in common by the end of their mutual admiration hootenanny.

trump and kim reverse

Bentley was there at the end.

Kim & Trump copy

Indeed, the whole shebang was a cartoonist’s picnic, and how could it not be when the theme of the whole circus was basically ‘how the fuck did it come to this?’, although, in the end, the ‘this’ wasn’t even remotely spelt out. There was distinct feeling of déjà vu for one.

trump historical with NK

So this generation’s Chamberlain-returns-from=Munich moment came and went, but, yes, it was historic, just as Chamberlain’s moment was, so later in the Nest, The ‘Pie will give a small gallery of the global take on this troubling and dangerous ego-fest.

But speaking of egos, let’s go local.

Successful Liars Need Good Memories … Someone In Walker Street Has Amnesia


To quote the perceptive Effie, ‘oh how embarrassment!’

Screen shot 2018-06-16 at 10.19.13 AM

It’s been a week of sphincter-clenching for our Mayor Mullet (heh heh, now just try and scrub that image from your mind), a classic tangled web all of her own making.

It all started earlier in the week, when local Labor folk had their usual factional bitch-slap meeting to decide on their delegates for the state conference, Mayor Mullet’s faction headed by the right-wing(ish) AWU got just three delegates, while Cathy O’Toole’s lefty supporter got the other six . That lopsided outcome would never have happened in recent times past. But maybe not a big surprise for those in the know … last month, a pub event with Hill and former Treasurer Wayne Swan attracted just 16 of the faithful, while a week earlier The Tool played host to Anthony Albanese and 110 turned out.

But it would seem that the mayor’s stocks are not just low with a growing number of disgruntled Labor punters.

Seems Some Councillors Have Visited The Spine Doctor For A Transplant

The ‘Pie is hearing that her aerobics class councillors, previously so silently compliant to her every whim as part of the deal in getting a ticket on the gravy train are starting to show a glimmer of rebellion. But wouldn’t you know it – and do try to control your astonishment- it isn’t about ratepayers welfare or visionary projects, but that issue everyone is talking about – how their deputy mayor is chosen, FFS!!!

Clr Mark Molachino

Clr Mark Molachino

It is said that Mark ‘Frothy’ Molochino, one of the great do-nothing public leeches of all time, has gathered some of his fellow gravy-trainers seeking support to push for an amendment to allow councillors to decide on their deputy doodah from among their number. Messagebank Walker is widely regarded as thick as Gina Rinehart’s left ankle and is not too popular as a goofy spokesman when Mayor Mullet is away. Or when he gabbles on about the Fabled Bus Hub, which is almost approaching mythical unicorn status. He sees himself as an heir apparent, a laughable vision not shared by his fellow councillors, apparently. probably not the voters, either, one guesses.

Deputy Doo Dah Les Messagebank Walker

Deputy Doo Dah Les Messagebank Walker

Whether this nascent rebellion goes any further no one knows, but it seems having dyed-in-the-blue Laborites as numbers one and two on an ‘independent’ council is rankling some who are already worried that they may be left on the gravy train platform when that choo choo pulls out in March 2020.

Several theories have come from this sudden show of self-interested spine, but you can bet on one thing … that Frothy Molochino – known as the Invisible Man in his division – will be putting himself forward as a people’s champion deserving of the hefty pay increase that goes with being Deputy Doodah. Anything is possible, as there is no love lost between Mullet and Messagebank. And of course, we have Shayne Sutton lurking in the wings.

But the whining amongst mummy’s little helpers is the least of the mayor’s concerns this week.

First came this, in spite of playing footsie in first class with her BBF Premier Alphabet.

Screen shot 2018-06-13 at 8.43.18 AM

Then this …

Screen shot 2018-06-16 at 10.59.20 PM

Screen shot 2018-06-12 at 5.57.13 PM

Then there was the revelation that the operators of the Bluewater airstrip had approached Qantas to be considered for their pilot training school … along with something like 44 other operators from around Australia. (More on that shortly). But this obliquely reflects on Mayor Mullet, who ludicrously and fruitlessly called for a passenger boycott of Qantas because they couldn’t be conned into paying for an airport upgrade which the airline quite properly believes should be paid for by owners Queensland Airports Ltd – not by a passenger tax the airline would have to impose. Qantas basically ignored Jenny Hill’s pompous hysteria on an issue that is in fact none of the council’s business – ignored but certainly noted. So the actions of our mayor will certainly be remembered when it comes down to short-listing and eventually choosing the community to host the Pilot School multi-million dollar lottery. So thanks, Mullet.

Then this weekend , mindful that time is ticking towards the next election, Mayor Mullet bowed to the inevitable and we got this …

Screen shot 2018-06-16 at 10.19.13 AM

… a story in which she simpered that she was withdrawing from the arrangement with Adani to co-fund an airstrip for the stalled Carmichael mine. Of course, this financial genius said they would revisit the arrangement once Adani had secured finance for the project, but the initial $18.5M will be spent in next week’s budget on local projects. Or far more likely, it wll go towards the first matter, the shortfall in pipeline funding. Which indicates if she is so utterly stupid enough to re-pledge that money, where is it coming from? Borrowing and more debt is the only answer.

But even when she does the right thing, her bumbling performance and perception is highlighted.

In yesterday’s announcement, the mayor said the money was going to be ‘redirected to shovel ready projects around the city’. But hang on, couple of question, me old stunned one – you have consistently said it was a done deal, although you stubbornly have refused give us any details of the arrangement with OUR money, APART FROM REPEATEDLY INSISTING IT WAS A DONE DEAL, WITH THE CLEAR IMPLICATION THAT IT WAS IRREVOCABLE. But unless whoever the deal was with sues you for dishonouring a contract, then there was no deal. Your pants are a three alarm fire, you liar.

Also, if things hadn’t unfolded in this way, your statement can only mean there were $18.5M worth of ‘shovel ready’ projects around town that would languished for years, while all shovels would’ve been borrowed by out-of-towners to build a bloody airstrip 400kms away.

Look The ‘Pie could go on but he’s starting to hyperventilate, suffice to say that you, Madam, are an A1 grade first-class, rolled gold self-interested nitwit. (pant pant, water please).

Talk About Metaphors

During the week, this video came into the Nest. It is ostensibly about some researchers trying to determine if cow shit contains methane, but the results are a great metaphor for what happens when you look into the current Townsville Council and its executive administration.

Talk Softly and Tiptoe Around, She’s Not Well

Far be it from The ‘Pie to make fun of the afflicted, oh, mercy me, no, so he asks you to spare a kind thought for our beloved Tool, that is Cathy O’Toole, the federal member for Herbert. She’s been looking a bit vacant during question time on telly lately, and she has now bravely confirmed our worst fears, by admitting she can’t handle things just now. She advised us all through our letter boxes of her plight. The ‘Pie was not surprised but was nevertheless so upset, he couldn’t read further than the first line.

Cathy O'Toole committed Get well soon , dear one, your contributions to our welfare will be sorely missed.

For Once, The Astonisher Tells It The Way It Is

A double page spread to give us the bleedin’ obvious

Good idea ... a Panadol should do the trick.

Yup, a couple of Panadol should do the trick. No-Doz even better.

But This Is NOT Funny

Big reaction during the week when The Magpie posted this comment.

The Magpie

June 13, 2018 at 10:18 am  (Edit)

Another new low for the Townsville Bulletin.

crim suburbsThis is disgraceful , and possibly worthy of a class action for damages. What possible purpose can this story have other than to stigmatise whole suburbs, where 99% of residents ARE NOT criminals? Yet another Bulletin story that further divides our city and there are clear dog whistling undertones of blatant racism bubbling just below the surface.

Simply disgraceful, iditor Jenni ‘ Couldn’t Care Less’ Cairney.

But that effort earned The ‘Pie’s Ironyman Man Award for the week, which went to News Limited CEO Robert Thomson, during a regular whinge about no longer having the free run of the press. The headline could well be a question for Jenni Cairney.

Screen shot 2018-06-15 at 3.59.33 PM

By coincidence, the Bulletin criminal suburbs story came out on the same day that an international research study on fake news was released. As well as discussing its rise to prominence, the report had a helpful guide to help you spot bullshit reporting.

Spot Fake NewsThere ya go, Astonisher, four out of five ain’t bad – and a special mention for the first and the fourth tell-tale signs. Even The somewhat more professional Australian has its Murdoch moments … like this silly stuffing around with a photograph, which was quickly smacked down on Twitter.

The Australian

That Bluewater Bid For The Qantas Pilot School – Will The TCC Back The Potentially Lucrative Move? Don’t Count On It

There’s more than aircraft in the air up Bluewater way – there’s growing evidence that there’s some clandestine and murky goings on with property deals and secret projects. There’s more and more evidence of a land grab by a cashed up international group, with the aim of creating a ‘sealed’ tourism network that has the potential to be set up in such a way that there may be little benefit to the local economy, and indeed to the Australian Tax Office. Visitors would have an all expenses experience paid up front but in their country of origin … mainly China.

 It’s A Tale Worthy Of Hollywood Treatment

The verifiable bullying and intimidation of Rollingstone property owner, 76-year-old widow Sandra Richards has been the catalyst to reveal some very disturbing possibilities. These involve the Townsville Council, the Queensland Department of Natural Resources, Mines and Energy (DNRME) , real estate agents and developers, as well as prominent law firm Emanate Legal, whose principal is Barry The Legal Foghorn Taylor – he’s in the thick of all this, although that is not to suggest he or a key member of his staff, Connie Navarro, have done anything provably illegal. At this stage. But if Mrs Richard’s son Cameron’s research is correct, Ms Navarro’s activities in allegedly providing legal advice to both the Townsville City Council and the DNRME in relation to a stock route road closure that virtually locked Mrs Richards off her property deserve a closer look .

Mr Richards has files that indicate the intimidation of his mother is aimed at getting her to sell her property (which has a lucrative mahoghany tree plantation soon ready to harvest) at a low price. Ms Navarro’s family property, which is adjacent to Mrs Richards, was bought from international developer Landmark, one of the companies belonging to the billionaire Tiong family of Sarawak.

Cameron Richards is adamant that the Navarros managed to secure the property, although there were at least two substantially higher bids (one from well respected Townsville businessman Conor Kersh). When anyone, especially a savvy and successful company like Landmork, takes a lower bid for a property, it is not unreasonable to assume something is going on.

Tiong interests own or control a growing number of properties along the northern beaches including land earmarked for an equestrian holiday resort at Bluewater aimed specifically at the Chinese tourism market. Plans for that project have been with the TCC for more than three years now, but just what the hold-up is is not clear.

David Wadley

A property developer and real estate agent, David Wadley, is involved with the Tiong/Landmark moves in the area. And there is definitely something afoot, according to Mr Wadley’s latest update on his website.

Screen shot 2018-06-14 at 8.00.22 AM

Moongobulla is the name of Mrs Richard’s property but also refers to the general area. So there is some plans for an unnamed project in that vicinity, according to Mr Wadley’s website. And the Brisbane address he lists on his website is also the office of Landmark in Brisbane.

Mr Richards is in discussions with the Townsville Council trying to determine why they suddenly and secretly reversed an approval for a road on which Mrs Richards, on the strength of the approval,  then spent $25,000 upgrading. He is also seeking information from the DNRME about the closure of a vital stock route that serviced his mother’s property without any notification or discussion. And which may not have been legal under Queensland’s stock route laws.

Then there is the issue that the police and bush fire brigade HQ are looking into a possible arson attack on Mrs Richards property three years ago, allegedly deliberately started by an off-duty member of the local bush fire service. Mr Wadley was involved in maters between Mrs Richards and the Navarro property, which he was managing at the time, and is expected to interviewed about the matter.

This is a very complicated matter, and all sorts of theories abound – one being that with the Tiong money involved, there may be an associated resort, possibly involving a golf course, to complement the planned equestrian centre at Bluewater and therefore the Bluewater airstrip could be a target for takeover. The ‘Pie has been told that one property owner close to the airstrip was contacted by Barry Taylor for a meeting, but the owner decided not to take up the invitation.

That’s as much as The Magpie is able to share at the moment – especially since Bazza is such a touchy bastard – wonder why?

We will be keeping a close eye on developments.

An Interesting Statistic From The ABC’s Election Analyst 

Speaks for itself.

Screen shot 2018-06-16 at 8.04.40 AM

A Small Gallery Of Cartoons Of The World’s Biggest Cartoon Character

The Singapore Bromance between Don and Kim, coming straight after Trump shafted Canada,  had the illustrators pens working overtime. Here’s a small sampling.

Trump enemy

Trump  flattery


G-7 Summit

trump canadaAND FINALLY …

The whole ludicrous affair of Trump making an enemy of America’s neighbor and staunch ally Canada before jetting off for a love fest with a man who had previously been his deadly enemy, had people veering wildly between unstoppable hilarity and abject terror. The best take of all was Borowitz in The New Yorker … the brilliance was that in this upside world, it could well have been true. But it wasn’t and isn’t.



That’s this week’s burnt offering, more next week unless someone mentioned this week sends Da Boyz aroud for a terminal chat with the old bird. So if you’ve been meaning to get in touch with your generous self and make a helpful donation to the upkeep of the Magpie’s Nest, better get in quick, might be your last chance. The how to donate button is below.

The Magpie's Nest is now more than five years old, and remains an independent alternative voice for Townsville. The weekly warble is a labour of love and takes a lot of time to put together. So if you like your weekly load of old cobblers, you can help keep it aloft with a donation, or even a regular voluntary subscription. Paypal is at the ready, it's as easy as ... well, easy as pie. Limited advertising space is also available.


  1. The Magpie says:

    These are the grasping corporate thugs that Mayor Jenny Hill is eager to deal with in our name, in order, she thinks, to get herself re-elected as a champion of job seekers. She is as disgraceful as her shyster mate, Gutam Adani.


  2. SPQR says:

    Excellent work on the Bluewater fiasco. Have a close look at the mob who have control of the airstrip out there.

  3. The Magpie says:

    No further comment required.

  4. Cantankerous but happy says:

    As Queensland’s most debt ridden council the Mullet should just bank the $18 million and stop spending money, TCC runs a debt of 84% of revenue, the only council in Qld over 80%, Brisbane and Ipswich are the only other two councils to even get over 60% at 62% and 63% respectively, we are a basket case economy, stop spending.

    • Cynical Cricket says:

      Where do your figures come from?

    • Inside TCC says:

      We are a basket case because they keep employing people into senior management roles with no commercial experience, when all you know is handouts and rate increases as a way of life you dont question value for money or even seek cost savings. Still hearing stories of departments being told you still have X left in the budget just go and spend it or we will be cut back next year.

      • Concerned says:

        The Impaler has proven herself to be someone that cannot be trusted.
        She is supposed to be a leader, but she has turned out to be nothing but a politically aligned, untrustworthy, disrespectful person and unless you tow the same political line as her you are screwed.

        • The Rolling Eye says:

          Rapid rate of southern imports to council an afilliated networx begun under impalers watch. Shaiyne Sutton is being most blatant we have seen in a very long time. Old man Mooney has lost his marbles/scruples an inpaler appears to have em all collected in her precious little pouch.

          • The Magpie says:

            Ummm, you seem to be implying that The Impaler has some scruples. Think you meant scalpels.

      • News Views says:

        Oh come on – that’s standard practice for all Govt Depts, GOCs and councils – spend your budget before the end of the financial year. If you don’t – it might indicate you don’t need as much next year and your budget could be reduced.

        • Inside TCC says:

          Thats kind of the point news views, the restructure of council was supposed to introduce new ‘commercially savvy’ management not the same old same old thats been there for years. $50k spent unnecessarily from 1 department because its there times how many departments in council? Very quickly the ‘make sure we spend it’ turns into hundreds of thousands of dollars wasted and its the complacency of comments like yours that allows them to get away with it. As a ratepayer of this city you should be outraged that they would waste money just so they can get more to be wasted next year, i know i am

          • whatwillidonowileftcouncil says:

            I am unsure how long INSIDE TCC you have been in TCC but, this rort has been happening for as long as I was an employee and that was over 20 years. A few CEO’s and Mayor’s later and nothing has changed or will change.

    • Scientician79 says:

      It strikes me that Mayor Mullet would only change her tune on the Airstrip funding because of financial problems.

      Why else would she back down from this “deal”, in the process demonstrating it to be the lie we all thought it was.

      And while I’d be celebrating a true change of position on this fiasco, this is just Mayor Mullet having her cake and eating it too.

      They have left the door open to negotiate when the mine gets it funding, although that seems to be about as likely as a skilled politician showing up to run this town, so I guess it’s dead in principal for the time being.

  5. Dearie Me says:

    There’s been unrest in the ranks of the councillors for some time.

    The Mullet is a poor liar (as we know) and has been lying to the councillors as well as the community.
    Messagebank is an old arrogant fool who speaks to them like they are all idiots (admittedly a large proportion were chosen to stand with Mullet and Messagebank because of their inability to think for themselves)
    The Impaler, from day dot, has driven a huge wedge between Mullet and Messagebank to the point where they no longer trust each other. If either of them had half a brain they would see the Impaler was the one not to be trusted.
    The Impaler and her regime ensures the councillors only get the bare minimum information. They have no clue what is really happening.
    Consequently they aren’t fully occupied and councillors like Kurt Rebend.. Rhebin.. Rebhin.. ah stuff it you know the one… Wanders aimlessly around his electorate knocking on doors reminding people he’s a councillor.

    • The Magpie says:

      Well, at least Clr Rehbein does that much, and doesn’t wait for an election to do so. Not that The ‘Pie knows him or anything about his baliwick. Frankly, The ‘Pie is glad they don’t knock on his door, and they can be glad that they don’t, too.

      • Cantankerous but happy says:

        Yes Rehbein is a lightweight Pie, nice enough bloke, former dog handler in the RAAF and then a firie i believe, but bottom of the ladder stuff, no real leadership qualities, like most in the Mullet camp all picked for that reason, just raise your hand when told and get the best paying job you have ever had for 4 years, not a bad setup really and if it all turns to shit after the 4 years just go back to doing what you did before.

        • The Magpie says:

          Well, at least in Kurt’s case, the featherbedding has gone to a bloke who elected to hold other positions of public trust and benefit … unlike, say ….????

          • Dearie Me says:

            When the likes of Gartrell, Jenny Lane and Vern Veitch were in Council they didn’t need to go knocking on doors to remind ratepayers they were councillors. The ratepayers knew who to contact. They also knew that their councillor would get them a real answer. Not something scripted by the media team. And that their issues would be dealt with.

            So why is it Kurt Rebhim needs to door knock to remind the ratepayers in his electorate that he is their councillor? Has he suddenly realised that to get re-elected they might need to know who he is?

          • crabclaw says:

            Dearie Me, while I agree with the intent of your comment, Ray Gartrell regularly did door knocks in his division, – rain, hail or heat wave I may add. He also often cycled around the streets of his division and had a pretty spot on idea of what was and wasn’t happening, what was needed and needed fixing. AND always promptly answered my emails and followed these up with feedback. Possibly why his division results were so close. I don’t think the power of presence, ie, the old door knock, can be underestimated.

          • The Magpie says:

            Fully agree with that sentiment about old Haystack, he was immensely popular and was one of the biggest surprise defeats in the election. he was easily the most highly visible councillor, and by all reports, one of the most effective. Wonder if he’ll run again? C’mon Ray, know you read the blog, what about it?

  6. Dutch Reverend says:

    Maybe Mochachino should concern himself more with the shortcomings in his division rather than the trifling of who best to be Deputy Doo Dah. He might even want to grace his constituents with his presence down, dare I say it, Kelso or Condon way. The river, which used to have a lot of Townsvillians near the Riverway bend enjoying activities such as skiing are nowhere to be seen. With good reason as well. The river is a disgraceful, choked up mess of weed. Any boat would have it’s propellor ruined and skiers would most likely drown from being entangled in the water weeds. Do your job Mochachino. Drag yourself away from Aitkenvale (where criminals live, suck eggs) and have the playground area of our river tidied up. Isn’t life depressing enough in this city under the rule of the Mullet. Do something worthwhile you pissant truffle snuffler.

    • Robert is your Mother's Brother says:

      “you pissant truffle snuffler”. I’m not sure you stand on him? Its tough to say. That said, if he really could snuffle truffles, he could be one of the best assets that the TCC has. Black Truffles currently going at $220 per 100grms. Put him into honest work and pay down some debt.

  7. Hee - Haw says:

    I wonder what Rockhampton have to say about being left with 100% of 50% of fuck all now?

    • Hondaman says:

      I always was told by those who knew, that the correct term for what Rocky’s inherited following Jen’s back-flip no. 1,000 odd was ‘ Three parts of five eights of fuck all!!’ Should be interesting if they follow suit, or decide to go it alone- who knows, Adani MIGHT happen, and just who will supply the workers?

  8. morcroft says:

    Bentley, you’re hilariously good.

  9. Kelsie J says:

    In private enterprise the successful employer needs to be fully informed at all times about the decisions their employees are making, yet politicians who are the employees of the taxpayer/ rate payer are for some reason not required to do so eg the questionable $18.5M Mayor Hill Adani airstrip funding and subsequent backflip. It is interesting to note how the privately owned Kelso Ross River Solar Farm is built in a matter of months yet the state funded $35 million 13 kilometre Riverway Drive Duplication is taking 19 months. For some reason all other workers work shifts but not these road workers. Very little weekend and night work occurs, so it causes maximum inconvenience to all road users. If someone has a medical emergency in Kelso the ambulance will definitely be delayed. Townsville has massive unemployment yet the number of workers working on the Riverway Drive Duplication is woeful. They could not work any slower.

  10. Memory Man says:

    So, the Rocky Mayor is holding the line on hand-outs to billionaires … reckons they can do it because their budget position is better than Townsville Council’s. Which wouldn’t be too bloody hard. Read this and weep when you come to the bit about Rocky’s style of fiscal management.


    • Dave of Kelso says:

      Having read the above link I say sack the TCC and the administration and place Townsville under the administration of the Rockhampton CC.

      On another matter, dear ‘Pie, are there any more jems to come from your “Mayor for a day” project?

      Sent from Pine Creek.

  11. Memory Man says:

    Says it all really. A broom needs to be put through the place.

    • Robert is your Mother's Brother says:

      If we had a dollar for every time that the Tool was outraged, we would have a lot of money.

  12. Mike Douglas says:

    Fresh from his $50,000 from Jenny Hill will Clive go for another easy $50,000 from Cathy Otoole who called him a narcissist?. More amusing comments from Cathy Otoole about Palmers recent billboards as “Trumpism at its best.” At least Clive is paying for his billboards unlike the ads Cathy’s placing in duo magazine and the papers telling everyone what she has secured even though she is in opposition at tax payers expense.

  13. Old tradesman says:

    With Uncle Clive running again has The Mullet apologised and settled the defamation bill with rate payers monies?

    • The Magpie says:

      Somewhere in the morass of that mess, The ‘Pie seems to remember that madam airly told us (i.e told the Townsville Daily Gullible) that it was covered by insurance … the premiums of which are of course paid by you and me. She made her actionable Clive statement as a re-election campaign gambit of virtue signalling that she might be a millionairess (which she is) but she’s still the battlers champion. And the sheeple believe it.

    • Peter Newey (TRRA) says:

      From our sources, we understand that it was ratepayers insurance paid for by the Ratepayers, which why clive most likely settled for the $50,000.

  14. Miss Lou says:

    Always good,
    Always entertaining.


    Miss Lou.

  15. Achilles says:

    Revolving doors and double talk.

    Queensland Premier Annastacia Palaszczuk has left the door open to approving loans for mines in the coal rich Galilee Basin, months after blocking federal government funds to Adani.

    Full article from today’s The Oz online: https://www.theaustralian.com.au/news/latest-news/qld-open-to-naif-mining-loans-palaszczuk/news-story/142a5d40d1a140eeaa9c16d50ae4f10b

  16. Cantankerous but happy says:

    Good old Townsville making headlines for the wrong reasons again, this time Core Logic identifies Townsville as the only place to have the double crown of reducing real estate values for both Houses and units over the last year by 4.6% and 2.3% respectively, but on the bright side the Rising Sun hotel sold for $21 million after being purchased for $1.45 million 30 years ago, the obvious lesson for all of us is clear, live at the pub.

  17. Achilles says:

    Serious question, will these bloody cold temperatures assist the reef in its recovery from bleaching?

  18. Hee - Haw says:

    Just came through the Townsville Airport off a Qantas flight tonight to find all the chairs which were blocking the lounge yesterday have been removed.
    I wonder if has anything to do with a bid for the Qantas Pilot Academy?

    • Grumpy says:

      They were there on Monday evening….

      • The Magpie says:

        Then Hee Haw may well be right … there’ almost a charming, child-like naivety in Gill’s behaviour. If only it didn’t impact on the city’s reputation so badly.

    • Alahazbin says:

      Maybe the QFS did that audit I requested way back when the fiasco started. I never heard any more other that they received my request.
      The ‘Dill’ was on ABC LOCAL this morning being interviewed about the upgrade. Still hanging out for QANTAS money.

  19. Mangrove Jack says:

    ABC Radio had Kevin “Rhymes With Dill” being interviewed by a young lass this morning over the proposed improvements to the Airport and the lack of support from Qantas.

    I didn’t realise ABC radio did paid advertising, as it seemed like the questions were provided by QAL and the “Interview” was scripted.

  20. The Magpie says:

    Ah, nothing like the relaxed NQ lifestyle of Cardwell, is there?

    Glad to know that some places are still operating on the fabled ‘Queensland clock’, a great old ‘she’ll be right, mate’ ethos. Especially the Hinchinbrook mayor when this story broke.

    Not to worry, folks, she’ll be apples, the mayor calmed everyone done, all under control. The Astonisher reported:
    “Hinchinbrook Shire Council issued a statement, warning the public to avoid anchoring nearby the jetty.”

    But fear not, Mayor Jayo strolled into action.

    “Reports received this afternoon indicate that the jetty appears to have broken its mooring chains and shifted. Contractors will mobilise a rapid response vessel tomorrow to inspect the jetty and determine options for repair,” Hinchinbrook Mayor Ramon Jayo said in a statement.

    Now where else would you hear the words ‘rapid response’ and ‘tomorrow’ in the one sentence? Why Cardwell, of course, the Laid Back Capital of NQ.

  21. The Owl says:

    Heard the Mullet was rushed to hospital this week with multiple bullet holes in her feet.
    Police confiscated a smoking gun but said there were no suspicious circumstances.

  22. Council workers "shovel" says:

    Heard this morning that there was a fire inside the compactors at hearveys range dump. Some dickhead would have put something flammable no doubt. The problem fire nearly burnt the whole thing down if it wasn’t for the one staff member there apparently. The dump has only 2 staff from 630 am till 9 and same in afternoon because of cost cutting. This useless conveyor belt system is dangerous and always breaking down. This is an essential service our dumps and I blame paul Jacob this was his bright idea to have this system and close jensen from the nth beaches. Imagine if it was a weekend when the transfer area at hearveys range dump was full of people. News crews everywhere at the front gate while a suit was not allowing them in. This council needs to go. More of my rates gone to repairs.

  23. Dearie Me says:

    Word out of council budget meetings is that the capital works budget has been slashed significantly for next year…
    With the recouping of the $18M, the need to slash the capital works budget presumably indicates the state of Councils finances is up to shit bonza. I guess that’s no big surprise to anyone inside Council watching ratepayers money get pissed away due to poor planning and mismanagement.

  24. Cantankerous but happy says:

    Last night on the news we see just how far the Labor tentacles have reached in Townsville, Port CEO Renae Crosby at a press conference with Jackie Trad and the other 3 useless things calling on the federal govt to stump up $75 million for the channel widening. Dumb move lady, you have now made the CEO position a political one, you are now a political appointment like the board, talk about being manipulated. The interview also highlighted once again the pathetic state of our media in Townsville, not one question as to why the state govt isn’t funding it completely and why they think the federal govt should pay for a state govt owned business, typical.

    • Concerned says:

      Thats all this fn useless state government does is pass the buck to the federal government and take no responsibility.
      People need to ask the question, does a country with a population under 30 million really need 3 levels of government.
      Feds are a must, and so are Local as they provide all your basic services, what value do State governments add and could what they do be done by departments operating under the feds and local governments pick up more?

    • Old tradesman says:

      The port supposedly makes $15 m profit each year and now is having a bumper season with all the renewables funded by Australian taxpayers. What a load of crap the Trad government owns the port, why should the feds put money in, just like the Stadium,to make Jackies coffers look good so she can fund her useless Cross River Rail in her electorate which is not needed until 2026.

      • The Magpie says:

        It also positions her well to knife Anna Alphabet in the back when the first opportunity presents itself.

    • I'll be plucked says:

      Hey Tanker, what’s even DUMBER is that waste of space, professional ‘nodder’, Captain Cupcake aka Scott Stewart (Cupcake – doughy, no substance and full of crap) demanding that the Feds kick in $75m to the profit making state govt. owned Port of Townsville asset! How the pluck this fool got a second term is astonishing!!!

      • Cantankerous but happy says:

        Easy answer Plucky, Stewart was re elected because out of all the people that voted One Nation 1793 of the brainless fuckwits preferenced Stewart ahead of Casie Scott, and you actually have to think about that for a second or two, 1793 people actually voted for the person they didn’t want to vote for, they were just too stupid to know that they were actually doing it.

  25. The Magpie says:

    Sorry Achilles, but no

    • Kingswood says:

      There were workers ripping up the entrance flooring on the entrance to the Q lounge when I arrived late Wednesday night. Not sure if it will be new floor or more bloody mismatched chairs with their unique patina of suspicious stains.

  26. Anonagain says:

    Telstra and the Bulletin story today .. Cathy O’Toole says Telstra is a “community based” company … “They’re still government owned” …. This is news to me. Telstra was privatised in 1997! Is she that badly informed??!! Heaven help Townsville’s influence in Federal Parliament.

    And further, the council booted out Telstra in 2017 to be replaced by a Singapore based company (seems to be a pattern with Singaporean commerce and Townsville). Why would Telstra continue to invest heavily in this region with such loving support – NOT – from our wonderful civic leaders? Rather than shouting from the sidelines to “keep 400 Townsville Telstra jobs!” (and they are specialist roles, highly educated, just what we need around here), start working again with Telstra and stop sending ratepayer’s hard earned back to Singapore! Yes, I’m a dreamer ….

  27. Frank says:

    I wonder who is going to win the federal election? Bill is looking pretty hungry with his union mates salivating at the prospect.

  28. The Wulguru Wonder says:

    Cathy O’Toole needs to brush up on her basic research skills, or learn how to use Google or Wikipedia.

    She states in today’s Asthonisher, in regard to the job losses announced by Telstra, that “they’re still government owned” which is just plain wrong.

    In 2006 the government placed the remaining 17% of Telstra that it owned (after the 3 rounds of privatisation held between 1997 and 2006) in the Future Fund. In 2009 the Future Fund sold some shares to reduce the government’s holding down to 10.9%, and in August 2011 it sold it’s remaining shares to effectively complete the privatisation.

    Well done Cathy, only you’re only 7 years behind the times.

    • Alahazbin says:

      And sitting in parliament with 37 dubious votes.

    • I'm just a fool and names O'Toole says:

      As well as the Telstra stuff up, The Tool asked the PM in question time today why funding had been cut to Caboolture health services. Hey Tool, you represent H E R B E R T – how about sticking to questions and issues in our electorate???

      The PM called her out as a liar in response as in FACT funding has increased – the Qld Labor Govt are the ones who have cut funding – the Feds increase funding, Qld Labor cuts funding in response, to patch up holes in the state budget.

      Bring on the election so that we can get rid of this useless, know nothing, do nothing Shorten puppet. What a Tool!

  29. Kenny Kennett says:

    O’Toole, the 3 Stooges, the Mullet and her chain of fools…and all those who’ve been given a trough to stick their snouts in; its desperate times North Queensland – get some opposition up and running before the tough runs dry….please.

  30. Sleepless in Hermit Park says:

    Usually , in the lead up to the v8s , we, the quiet residents of Hermit Park , as distinct from those with a fractured domesticity , are prepped with hoons , every fucken year. Lately its the wheelies again and a tag team. You see , every Thursday and Friday night after about 1030 pm , its WRX time . Thats a fancy small fast sedan with a beefy VW sounding engine and exhaust like Herbie on steroids for old fogies. And with the regularity of a delivery driver, and it aint pizza folks and schnooferhunds! Then he buggers off and its loud trail bike time for the local circuit just as you nod off . And not one of those little ning ning things either. They must have done a sleep study obviously. He has to rev the throttle up and down as he goes announcing himself like a Mardi Gras float .He goes , and his mate comes back before 2am and goes home to sleep. And he comes back all night long . And you know what the feminists say about those types that buy those bikes and v8’s eh?? We have nick named him “F.O.N.C.” (FRIEND OF NO C@#$) .On the weekends in daylight, He and his bestest sista girl -“F.O.F.” (FRIEND OF F.O.N.C.) usually parade side by side too. Not judging, me old F.O.N.C.STER , whatever floats your boat . These are modern times and as the court said about Jason Donavan…well..you get the picture . He is the only trail bike rider on the Police Bayswater rd intersection CCTV and CHTowers rd facing business cameras last night 22-23/6/18.
    That aside I think , if there was a more sinister reason , like the fella is a rogue vigilante cop , Townsville business mafia/v8’s, or a real estate speculator intent on intimidating old ladies (lot of that going round) into saying enough is enough and selling up I have an idea. Especially if its a copper . I think the best way to deal with that , is to catch him and put his nuts in a vice and record his effeminate screams . The tape headphones to his ears and play it back to him -all night long while he hangs naked from a light pole by his heals (or stiletto’s as the case may be) . Throttle it up and down …all night long . As the song goes…Good night sweatheart till we meet tomorrow ….good night sweetheart no more pain and sorrow….Somebody keep the peace by forwarding this to cops.

    • Sandgroper says:

      My sympathies, Sleepless, and it’s so unneccesary. All the cops have to do is devote some resources to the problem and set a couple of traps, then throw the book at these wankers.
      Boy racers with undescended testicles are motor sport’s worst enemies. They all think they’re Mark Marquez or Daniel Ricciardo, but don’t have the guts to have a serious go on the track.
      As an enthusiast with a road-registered competion car that is driven to and from hillclimbs, sprints and rallies, I get hassled by these idiots trying to race every time I go on the road. The sad thing is that they have spent a fortune on their gilded chariots, but use expense as the excuse not to try them out on the track where they’re not a menace or nuisance to the public.

    • Sleepless in hermit park says:

      Last night was 21-22/6/18 coppers. Sorry , what do you expext though without sleep. Too bad if my job required me to be on higher alert than anyone else for safety reasons hey?

    • Dave Nth says:

      Don’t hold your breath on the cops doing anything, from experience out this way it was an epidemic a couple of years ago. The perps will get endless warnings & their cars will rarely if ever be impounded.

      Cops I have had acquaintance with admit they just don’t have the time to deal with unless it happens in front of their face or you have video footage that identifies driver & numberplate they really can’t do much.

      If you are really serious about get some footage & approach the local station.

  31. The Magpie says:

    Of all the heinous things this dangerous ego maniac has done, the child detention immigration issue is the one issue likely to sink him. And a side benefit for us in that is that this unforgivable bastardry is that it might just make local Trump cheerleaders like erstwhile old Country Party Conservative Eammon ‘Call Me Ted’ Lindsay and his coffee klatch chums like Max Tomlinson will put down their pom poms and realise what fascist sentiments they have been unwittingly (one hopes) supporting (fat chance!)

    • The Magpie says:

      And have just heard an American expert (on US radio through RN)that the process hasn’t been thought through, no coordination plan between where the parents are and where the kids are, just thrown together by the carrot-topped fuckwit, which will mean – no matter what laws are passed – some of these children will not see their parents again for three to four years, and possibly not until adulthood. The US has 300 – that is three hundred – immigration judges to handle 800,000 … that is eight hundred thousand – refugee cases. And Trump refuses to fund more. These judges may rule that it unsuitable to repatriate a child to the country of origin where they would be exposed to danger of violence and grinding poverty, but that those sentiments will not apply to the parents. Trump is a one-man cluster fuck of epic proportions. Safe borders, appropriate controls and orderly timely adjudgments are desirable and the sovereign right of any country, but using emotional blackmail and psychological turmoil as a deterrent weapon is despicable in the extreme.

      The sad thing is that Trump’s policy in this area makes our own cruel solution look almost humane – which it is not.

    • Achilles says:

      According to an article on the online The Oz the photo is bogus. The Honduran toddler pictured sobbing in a pink jacket before US President Donald Trump on an upcoming cover of Time magazine was not separated from her mother at the US border, according to a man who says he is the girl’s father.


      Doesn’t change anything regarding the insensitivity and two faced behavior

      • The Magpie says:

        (Sigh) Good old Oz paper. It is absolutely clear that the proposed (not finalised) Time cover was not posed, it is a composite picture, and trying to justify Trump’s behaviour because the picture is ‘bogus’ (as in a real picture in real time) indicates the level of intelligence and moral standards of those that accept the policy … which BTW, Trump no longer does, he’s slowly realised the enormity (correct use of the word please note) of his stance. Or more likely, the loss of votes next time around.

      • The Magpie says:

        That is pretty well known, but anyone who believes it is an actual picture of Trump and child – and that the child has to be a detainee – are wilfully missing the point.

    • sir ossis o'fliver says:

      I think Ted was in fact a Labor Man

      • The Magpie says:

        The ‘Pie was recently told that Ted started out in the old Country Party until he saw the gravy train at the Labor station, and crossed the rails. Our man is said to get somewhat peeved when this is brought up.

  32. Sam1 says:

    Townsville has not been included on the short list for the Qantas Academy. What a surprise.

  33. Cantankerous but happy says:

    Not surprisingly Townsville airport has not made the shortlist of towns for the Qantas pilot academy, although I am sure it would have given those making the decision a bit of a laugh that Gill even thought he had a show, but good to see Mackay has made the shortlist, nice town Mackay, it went Bogan feral for a few years when the coal boom was on and moved away from its farming and tourism focus but becoming a nice place once again, be good to see them get something like this.

    • Concerned says:

      What a joke, this is making a laughing stock of OUR country and when companies trying are to do business in Australia.
      This may sound harsh but who is running OUR country, our government of this so called native title crap and their lying caniving so called elders.
      Yet again the name Akee appears when dodgy unlawful criminal activities occurr, watch this get swept under the carpet again just like the TAHS bulshit.
      All because of the colour of her skin.
      Our GUTLESS governments have to start truly representing the people that want OUR country to go forward and become even better, you know the ones that work everyday, pay taxes and provide all the things we all take for granted.

  34. Old tradesman says:

    I believe Dolan is departing our fine shores and heading to the Great South East Kingdom to peddle his wares to bigger fish, probably sick of the Young Mullet with Gill’s that abound here.

    • Cantankerous but happy says:

      Tradie, Just following a long tradition in Townsville of people who have weaseled themselves into positions of influence in this town only to right royally fuck the place over then head south leaving a complete fucking mess behind them, but as we have said many times the gullible dickheads in this town keep falling for the same thing time and time again, starting to wonder if it’s all worth the angst of swimming against the tide in this joint.

      • The Magpie says:

        OK The ‘Pie will let that through as a generic statement, but being the intrepid reporter that he is, he can report on solid information that Mr Hayes is not leaving Townsville … The ‘Pie understands he has family ties to keep him here. There is a whisper he is moving house, but apparently not out of town.

  35. Mike Douglas says:

    Even though unemployment has fallen and Townsville has water our stubborn Mayor wants to push forward and cost rate payers $2 mil in interest for a loan to cover the pipeline construction which is outside the State Government funding timelines she knew. The Queensland towns on the 60 towns shortlisted for the Qantas regional training facility are Mackay and Toowoomba. No doubt both these towns Mayors didn’t ask the residents not to fly Qantas.

  36. Cynical Cricket says:

    What’s this all about, I thought it had been settled?
    Townsville Mayor to fight $3 million lawsuit for allegedly defaming Clive Palmer

  37. Scientician79 says:


    So it seems the defamation action has not been settled, and Mayor Mullet intends to defend herself.

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