SHOWSTOPPER: The Bulletin’s Mea Culpa For A Front Page Cock-up Takes Us All By Surprise.

A genuine apology for poor performance by any news outlet is as rare as gay pride parades at the Vatican,  but Bulletin editor Jill Poulson didn’t flinch this week with an unprecedented apology to readers .  Could this be the much needed turning point for the paper to regain some credibility?  If this is that catalyst, it will have to go much further than just correct grammar and fat fingered keyboard mistakes,  others areas need to be urgently addressed,  including knowing what day it is – literally.

A message from afar for our stumblebum mayor-in-suspension  on how honourable people  behave when caught out doing the wrong thing.  And The Magpie has the ideal gift suggestion for this crook, from a group in Victoria.

As the saga of our con man mayor draws near an unpredictable end,  the Crisafulli Government and the hapless Local Government minister  have painted themselves into an uncomfortable corner,  as Labor mounts a somewhat hypocritical personal attack on the Premier himself.

And The ‘Pie has a sensible suggestion how any council money that is usually ear-marked for the now departing AFCM,  a project that could prove just as valuable in the long run.

And The Magpie offers a personal reminiscence of Col Joye, the bloke.

And heading our American gallery this week, an American comedian with a perfect ear gives us a brilliant, jaw-dropping impersonation of the mobster president, who is facing all those damned illegal chickens he let loose coming home to roost. Finally, a perfect storm is brewing for this disgusting muppet.

As The Nest heads towards the end of it’s 15th year,  the costs of putting it out each and every week continue unabated.  And hasn’t gotten any cheaper. If you can lend a helping hand to meet the Nest bills,  the link to donate is at the bottom of the blog. Thanks.

Friday, August 8, 2025: A Different Sort Of Sorry Day 

Newspaper apologies … often coyly labelled the less flagellating ‘corrections’ or ‘clarifications’…. are retro-court defences against possible legal action, and are usually tucked away inside the paper at the bottom of a distant page. On Friday, a flabbergasted ‘Pie wrote in comments: 

So it’s fair to say the old bird could hardly believe his eyes when he scanned today’s editorial. In 60 years in the game, he has never seen an apology of this nature anywhere in the print world.

Well, Jill, full points for having the guts to do what no other editor before you had either the gumption or decency to do … acknowledge inter alia the appalling drop in grammatical standards of your – our – newspaper.

Although your hand was perhaps forced by the mistakes appearing on the front page, The ‘Pie doesn’t underestimate the soul-searching such an admission would require,  BUT please don’t downgrade or dismiss the regular errors littered throughout just about every edition of the Bulletin. They too – every single one of them – “fall well below the professional standards our community expects and deserves from their local newspaper”.

You’ve put the ball firmly in your own court, Jill, it is now up to you to demonstrate the sincerity of your words with a tighter policy on these and other shortcomings of the Townsville Bulletin.

Not To Labour The Point,  But The Following Is The Sort Of Cred Killer That Must Be Addressed

The very same edition featuring the spelling bloopers contained another inexplicable bit of carelessness, and while old mate reporter Cameron Bates was the journo, the fault here lies as much with the Chief of Staff, who’s job it is to keep track of these matters.

Here is how The Magpie reported the glaring oversight in comments on the day.

More of Yesterday’s News Tomorrow from the Daily Astonisher.
TODAY, we get:

Putting aside the tedious and unnecessary use of ‘alleged’ in the headline,  it was nasty and terrifyingincident, albeit revealed in a very timely manner by an anonymous source, just when teachers and nurses and medical staff are taking to the streets highlighting the woeful working conditions they are subjected to by a tight-fisted government.

BUT it seems Cameron ‘Master’ Bates had his Ku Fu Panda undies in such a frenzied bunch, he overlooked a kinda important fact, when we read towards the end of today’s report:

Well old mate, today is the 7th, yesterday was the 6th, so our man, who can now be named but hasn’t been, has already appeared in court. Weren’t you there?

One would’ve thought if a story gets front page and then prominence inside the paper, it would be best to keep up with it.

Otherwise, Master Bates, people might start saying you don’t even know what day it is – which, in this case, you didn’t.

But It’s Not All Bad News From The Bulletin Bunker

Editor Poulson seems to be shifting her editorial policy somewhat from the inane ‘sick kiddies sell papers’  myth (God knows where they find their focus groups that advise this, possibly customers in curlers at hairdressing salons in the outer suburbs),  and instead moving toward genuine community news of importance. And reporter Leighton Smith seems to be coming good at last, his story on the planned conversion of a CBD building into student/backpacker-type accomodation was followed up by a well researched spread in this weekend’s paper about the shameful state of neglected sites around the city.

Ironically, Leighton and other reporters have previously written glowing bullshit about many of these sites (The Hive and The North Rail Yards in particular) and he still has to prostitute himself to make a quid for the paper’s real boss, the adverting manager, with demeaning crap. (No offence to the Ahmad brothers, but fellas, you ain’t news, you just sell sliced mincemeat rolled in flat bread.)

And please don’t think The ‘Pie is trying a humblebrag when he notes that there has been a marked decrease … massive in fact … of Dad joke punning headlines in the paper.

What TwoNames Thompson Could Learn From The Spanish

Hey, El Slimo, this is how it is done by people with a genuine regard for public probity and dignified withdrawal from office. Apparently in Spain, there is a different response when elected representatives even fiddle slightly with their educational claims.

So you have been revealed in all your disgraceful glory,  shown up by what you and your mob would call a ‘dago shiela’. Seems there’s no relief for Townsville, which for 10 long years had a Maltese cross to bear.

But as your year of freeloading on the ratepayer draws to a close,  we all await your fate. Even you know you won’t be going back to Walker Street,  so you, you odious ball, are firmly back in David Crisafulli’s court.

And the first thing the premier could do is pull his hopelessly dithering  Local Government minister into line, following her finger to the public by stonewalling any update to parliament this week on the CCC investigation.  Rather than give a response paying due regard to this city’s nervous uncertainty about a just outcome, Ann Leahy chose to treat the matter as a political cat fight, simply because the question came from the opposition Labor benches. She wouldn’t even say if the CCC report had been delivered to her yet. Which makes one think that it certainly has, because a simple no would hardly be controversial given the legislation which controls the CCC.

Crisafulli needs to get on top of this one before it really blows out into a wider controversy. His government is already playing ducks and drakes on the crime issue, using a spurious QPS report (if it even exists) claiming a trial of vehicle immobilisers was canned ‘because the devices were ineffective’ and (believe this if you will) “they raised concerns about the potential for immobilisers to be used coercively in domestic violence incidents and to escalate violence during vehicle theft”.  Which will all remain a load of hot cock until that report is released to the public, which it has not – no reason given and none can be imagined.  It truly was an inexplicable move, given the seeming intractability of the issue. 

But The Kid has other dodging and weaving to do,  at the moment trying to weather a personal attack on him by an albeit hypocritical Cameron Dick about his private business dealings. prior to becoming premier.  It would seem he has some explaining to do, especially as the matter involves sleaze bag grant rorter Rabieh Krayem.

The Kid needs to be careful with this, a drooling Jarrod Bleijie is hovering, ready to use the support he has. been quietly gathering over the past year, to taske over Crisafulli stumbles.

But Could The Thompson Issue Be Cause For A Local Referendum on ‘De-merging’?

The ‘Pie had a laugh when he spotted this.

Seems no one told us that we’re now a capital city. Oh, wait, maybe they mean Cairns. The horror!!!

But with our population now past the 200k mark (due mainly to ADF boosts), another nascent idea that has been idly floated by a few around town, came into focus.

It is undeniable that the TCC under Hill had grown further and further away from both its constituents and it’s core responsibilities in favour of chasing hazy aspirations of big city glory.

So here’s a question being hesitantly asked: should we ask for a referendum of Townsville ratepayers and citizens whether we should ‘de-merge’, that is, go back to being the twin cities of Townsville and Thuringowa?

Looking into this seemingly impossible suggestion, The ‘Pie contacted a number of people, with many out in the old Thuringowa boundaries looking back nostalgically for what they believe were the good old days.

While current legislation, and the eye-watering costs to the state of previous de-mergers (Cairns and Livingstone are the closest example) make it an unlikely scenario,  there are some factors that support the idea.

Most agreed that the TCC seems to have lost sight of its core functions, which are summed up in the cliche of ”rates, roads and rubbish’.  Parts of town are indeed looking shabby and unloved. A leadership that chased dreams of vast schemes and many an untenable project distracted elected councillors and their staff from ensuring those underpinning crucial functions were maintained.   There was also a feeling that bureaucracy was taking over more than is desirable, and the average punter is, layer by layer,  being further removed from the process.  Those who lived in Thuringowa were in the main the ones that resented Beattie’s bullying, forced amalgamation,  and voted solidly to oust Labor’s Tony Mooney and install ‘their man’ Les Tyrell at the top of the new super council. (Sadly, we know how that ended up.)

Another problem emerged a few short years after amalgamation, in that the projected efficiencies of scale – the mantra that big is better –  hadn’t eventuated, and two councils looking after a smaller area could now be more efficient, given technological advances.

Long odds of it ever happening, but as long as we have a vacuum of responsible respected leadership, both elected and appointed,  the idea may grow more attractive as the Walker Street behemoth grows ever bigger and more remote from that mythical yardstick of democracy, the man in the street. (OK OK  settle down, ‘person in the street’ if you must).

The Lesson The Townsville Arts Community Can Learn From Nelson Mandela

OK, so the AFCM has gone off to Cairns, and its loss is keenly felt by a local community which wholeheartedly supported it for so many years. Many have told The ‘Pie their biggest frustration is that there is no one particular person on which to focus their anger and disappointment, it was perhaps an inevitable eventuality of geography and perception.

But those still smarting from what they see as ill treatment, perhaps need to remember this.

An eloquent thought from an eloquent man,  and a lesson from which we in Townsville can learn.

Simply put, we must move on, and here is one way that The Magpie thinks is highly achievable. This idea has been hovering in the back of  mind for years, ever since Townsville’ VP 50 celebrations in the mid-90s.  There was a forties themed dance , a sort of overflow event for those who didn’t quite make the VIP  A list knees up elsewhere.  It held in a airport hangar where the music was to be provided by a military band.  Heavy on the brass and woodwind, the dozen or so players, resplendent in dress gear,  looked quite dazzling but The ‘Pie was ho hum, a night of John Phillip Souza and a section of obscure old British military staples.

I could not have been more wrong. Polished and professional was to be expected, but the repertoire of show tunes and musical gymnastics with pop tunes current and recent was a delightful surprise. (As was the nimble and elegant performance of Bulletin colleague, Andy Toulson, who  stopped the  show with several show-stopping eye catching turns on the dance floor with her hubby … unforgettable!).

And those memories came back to me with all the chat about the loss of the AFCM.  What could the musically minded patrons and performers do now without the inspiration?

Well, how about this? Townsville is a city chockas with musical talent, many who would play for expenses and a glass of warm Kangra Rouge afterwards, and we already have the Barrier Reef Orchestra which even might consider this idea themselves.

So why not form a pared down version of the stupendously successful Boston Pops orchestra?  Unlike the excellent Barrier Reef Orchestra, this would be a commercially aimed exercise, to introduce new audiences, and ease them into the classical world. And while The ‘Pie is no Theodore Kucher, he is not suggesting another 70 players a la the BRO, but perhaps 30 to 40 tops.

The repertoire should not be favourites aimed at an established classical audience,  its appeal should be directed unashamedly towards  more a commercially saleable product, persuading new ears to further musical adventures. This could be achieved  by inventive orchestral workings of show tunes,  swing classics,  blues and witty versions of current (if any are remotely playable) pop songs.  Light classics could be interspersed throughout, maybe acting as an introduction to the ‘heavier’ more introspective  end of classical music (believe it, you really do need some preparation for a Wagner Ring Cycle, and some of us  will never be prepared for Mahler.) Children could be attracted by staples like Peter and The Wolf, Townsville has no end of fine voices for narration.  Accomplished guitarists in the popular arena could join in for special concerts, an irresistible amalgam of styles.

The difference from other ensembles is putting such music in an orchestral framework.

This is all about accessibility and saleability, not a suggestion to boost our civic sense of self-worth.

The love and pride we have in Dance North is perhaps more honoured in the breach, but a Townsville Pops Orchestra ensemble could grow to be real crowd puller. If a reputation can be established, big name guest artists could be attracted here.  While grants would be available from a number of avenues, this is an idea that could, if not turn a profit, significantly defray costs.

It has often been disappointing that around here, the general attitude to many initiatives – some doable, some not, but all always worthy of sensible discussion, -meet the standard barrage of reasons why something cannot be done.  Whether this idea is ‘doable’ or not,  any discussion should start at the other end of the spectrum, that is, how can we make this happen?  That is the only path to the true answer of the prospects of any venture.

Just a thought.

Amerika

It is now apparent there are two weak spots in Teflon Don’s armour. There’s the on-going Epstein stuff, of course, but then there is his tendency to lose it big time when he cops humorous criticism or parody.  His reaction to the TACO tag (Trump Always Chickens Out) was classic Streisand Effect, reacting in such a way to greatly amplify the joke.

So he is going to HATE this if he ever sees it, it is the wonderful mimicry – if you close your eyes and listen to this, (roll through to 20.20) you really will think you are hearing the voice of Trump.  If you take the time to listen beyond the couple of minutes of Trump,  this bloke’s  Obama is equally good, and he so accurately demolishes Elon Musk, J D Vance and Ronald Reagan as a bonus.  And it doubly delish because the voice that has Trump down pitch perfect belongs to the comedian who performs under the mononymic name of Godfrey … who is black.  The whole hour is not just funny but instructive with details you probably never knew. If that’s what blows your dress up … if not, moving on …

The phrase, which backfired from the outset … Trump Derangement Syndrome … is suddenly crystallising into it’s literal meaning.  Who but a deranged mind would reach this conclusion.

But those chickens are inexorably coming home to roost, along with other policies that will degrade the average American’s lifestyle, and not just in the shops. Schools, health care, pensions and jobs themselves are under open attack.  Come to think of it, apart from  billionaires, everything isn under attack, including morals, ethics and the value of truth.

but the tariff issue reminds The ‘Pie of the old racist joke, what is the difference between a Kiwi and a computer? Answer: you only have to punch information into a computer once. (boom tish). So it seems the same could apply to the MAGA morons.

The Magpie’s Ode To Joye

The past is a foreign country: they do things differently there.

The passing of Col Joye during the week no doubt prompted some nostalgic memories and reflection on the massive changes of time and place in Australia’s popular music landscape.    Joye was a true icon of the watershed era in Australia’s musical history,  and H.P Hartley’s famous opening line of The Go-Between sums up perfectly the stark changes in our national musical identity.

Although much of Col’s music owed a good deal to C&W, he was the first Australian of the ‘rock and roll’ generation to reach number one on the local charts.

Colin Jacobsen was born in Sydney in 1937. Exactly 20 years later, he burst onto the musical scene in 1957,  changing the name of the original The KJ Quintet (the initials of his brother and bass man Kevin) to Col Joye and The Joy Boys.  Two years later, the song embedded in the memory of all early boomers, Bye Bye Baby Goodbye,  hit the number one spot on the Sydney charts. This was followed by three further Top Ten hits,  but it wasn’t until 1973 that his single Heaven Is My Woman’s Love (with the little Brisbane outfit the Bee Gees doing backing vocals) hit the national number one spot.

He remained a force across the industry until the last few years,  summed up in the tribute from ARIA CEO Annabelle Herd: “From music to TV, publishing to concert promotion, artist management and live performances, Col Joye made a remarkable contribution to Australian music for more than six decades. At a time when the local industry was dominated by US and UK artists, he proved that Australians would embrace local artists and local music.”

Most have probably forgotten it now, but Joye was an unwitting but leading figure in the fan wars of the late fifties and early sixties.

For many teenagers back then, the split was between the clean-cut images and hummable rhythms of Joye as opposed to the Wild Child persona of the more visceral Johnny O’Keefe.  Indeed, to invoke some forgotten language, O’Keefe was the hero of the leather clad bodgies and widgies of the day. It all seems so tame now, but O’Keefe was the bad boy of rock, his Shout sending parents and prissies into melt down (although you’ll note in the clip that the screaming audience remained seated throughout – seems totally weird nowadays).  Joye just kept to his lane, never provoking or escalating the fan controversy that was very real at the time.

I  met ol twice over the years, the first time when I had just started in journalism at NEN 9 in my home town Tamworth.  In 1966 or 67, when Col did a gig at the local Workmans’ Club., I interviewed him pre-show, and he invited me to join the after-concert  party.. He was chatty, friendly, never up himself and while a few of us, including his roadies, made the most of it, Col just remained an affable, gag-telling figure throughout.

The second time was some 20 years later, when the sliding doors of life decreed that in 1985 while I was working an Channel 10 as a sports reporter/producer, I was lunching alone in the media haunt the Peacock Gardens Chinese Restaurant in Crows Nest.  Col and several companions -including one of his roadies from the Tamworth party – took a table near-by. Now I’ve never been sure why,  maybe someone had an extraordinary memory, but seeing me alone,  Col invited me to join them – yes, he really was that sort of bloke.  We subsequently swapped some TV gossip and even relived the Tamworth night, of which there were a few highlights glossed over.  And still, Col Joye hadn’t changed one bit … affable,  and always more interested in those around him than putting himself in the limelight with endless anecdotes that others in his position may have regaled us with.

Hope you enjoy the clips of a past era, and remember as fondly as I do, Col Joye,  a persona who embedded his music into the memory  of a whole lucky generation.

Vale.

At To End, A Problem Solved

Submitted on 2025/08/08 at 1:51 pm A problem easily solved for free … give the lamb to Troy Thompson. Then it will always have an arsesole to shit on everybody and everything

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Lots to think about in there, have your say in comments on any matter of interest to you.  To help out with blog costs, the link to make a donation is below.