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The Magpie

Sunday, May 19th, 2024   |   252 comments

Mayor TwoNames Thompson Jubilant The Council Getting Rid Of The North Rail Yard Site – To Itself.

Sounds nuts? Yes, it does. And it’s true. Another campaign promise goes north.

The Townsville Bulletin gets its act together. Could we be in for a better informed future?  This week, The ‘Pie comes to (mostly) praise the Astonisher, and not to bury it.

But The ‘Pie has a BIG exclusive, which is why TwoName Thompson has not given us any military service details. A friend in high places … can’t say too much, you know how it is … has leaked to The ‘Pie the DoD’s email response to Thompson regarding his service history.  As with most things miliary, it is unintelligible to the uninitiated , but The Magpie translates.

Jilted Kattertonic reject Clynton Hawks is looking for love on the rebound. He says he’ll open his ideological legs to anyone who will mount him as a candidate. But again the Bulletin shies away from a pretty obvious question.

And there’ve been some great quotes this week, the ‘Pie has few for your bewildered outrage, along with some very funny stuff from cartoonists in our weekly American gallery.

If you enjoy this weekly labour of love and the exploding comments section (lots of good citizen journalists have found their voice in comments of late),  maybe you might consider supporting the Nest with a few bob.  The Nest is free of advertising but still there are costs that keep accruing. The Magpie is no moneybags, so a helping hand would be greatly appreciated. The donate button is at the end of the the blog every week. 

Direct From Transparency Central – Mayor TwoNames Completes His About-Turn On The North Fail Yards (not a typo).

It is now clear that Troy Thompson’s learning curve is vertical.  This from Thursday’s Nest.


The Magpie needs your assistance here, folks, seriously. Especially from those readers with proven business experience. This media release is deeply insulting, juvenile in its attempt at spinning subterfuge, and another disconcerting announcement from Captain Transparency.

The outrageous false implication of actual progress with this mess, and the patronisation of the electorate, is in the very first two lines:

Redevelopment plans for the historical North Rail Yards site have reached a key milestone, with Council moving to transfer land to the company leading the project, North Rail Yard Developments Ltd. Mayor Troy Thompson said transferring the land titles was required to allow the proposed development to occur, while not affecting Council’s ownership of the site.

“This is an important step to making this project a reality,” he said.

A key milestone,my cloaca.  An important step? Utter tripe.

It is nothing of the sort.
The council is transferring the North Rail Yards land and rusting ramshackle ‘heritage’ infrastructure to a company THAT IS A TOWNSVILLE CITY COUNCIL COMPANY (owned by the ratepayers). In other words, Thompson is claiming the council giving the land to itself is some sort of milestone. and progress towards what is, without outside public funds, an impossible dream,

This transfer is nothing more than pro forma,  a technical bit of paper shuffling that changes nothing, progresses nothing and gives not a scintilla of hope that Thompson has one fucking single clue about what is going on. All we’ve got are three more blood sucking burdens on the public purse in the guise of new company directors (two from Brisbane, apparently). The North Fail Yards (not a typo) site remains a moribund real estate bastard child. Unless there is a rich sucker around, and ‘rich’ and ‘sucker’ are two words that are usually mutually exclusive..

And you just keep diggin’, TwoNames your poor clueless coot … fresh from a campaign blustering about the site to be sold off, you now embrace it with all the shining insincerity of a Jenny Hill, compounding the hypocrisy with an ignorant reference to the North Fail Yards as an ‘historic heritage site’ that will have investors and developers heading for the hills. And no one could blame them.

And The Bulletin Wasn’t About To Let Him Get Away With It, Either.

There is nothing more dangerous as a newspaper scorned. With this unexplained about turn by the mayor (actually it was inevitable but a mea culpa would’ve been appropriate), the paper was happy to put on its bovver boots and let him have it in the Jimmy and the twins.  But one wonders if this bloke has the top shelf wherewithal to get the message.

From The Bulletin:

Screen Shot 2024-05-18 at 6.44.41 pm

In a statement published on the Townsville City Council website, Mayor Troy Thompson threw his weight behind the North Rail Yards in an article that said the project was “gathering steam”.

Screen Shot 2024-05-18 at 6.45.56 pm

The statement is at odds with a pledge made during his successful campaign for mayor, in which he promised to reduce debt through the “sale of unnecessary assets” and reducing council involvement in major projects.

“The Rail Yards, lets sell them,” he said.

“Let our developers and our city grow … bring some of those assets and sell them so that people can use them.”

Townsville Mayor Troy Thompson promising to sell the North Rail Yards during his campaign.

He said the council could ensure the assets were “used correctly, but we need to sell those assets”.

It is not the first time the mayor has walked back campaign pledges, including a promise of a four-year rates freeze.

And despite blasting his predecessor Jenny Hill for employing three political advisers, Cr Thompson has attempted – and failed – to do the same.

And the best thing about this reporting is that it all factual, and more importantly, in the community interest. (More on that in a minute).

Warning Signals _ The ‘Pie Has A Message For You

Mr Mayor, The Magpie is a staunch defender to the right to privacy when that right is … well, right. In the case of your military history, you as a publicly elected figure do not enjoy in that right, or in other relevant areas – in your case, your entire past, starting from when you first said ‘The dog ate my homework”in primary school..

So please don’t chuck a wobbly when you realise someone in the DoD has provided The Magpie with that email you received, but refused to release, outlining your military history in Signals.  It is The Magpie’s duty to share it with his readers (both of them, hi Dave).  In case some of the small print might give a clue to the source, The ‘Pie will decline from showing the actual email, but here is the message.

Dear Mr Thompson/Birnbrauer or to whom it may turn out to concern,,

We have received your request for details of your time serving your country, in the military –  and we believe serving is the correct word for your efforts. 

After a thorough search, we are able to confirm your status within the Defence Forces of Australia,  but because we understand the information to be sensitive given your heightened public profile, we have forwarded it to you in a manner that only a Signalman would understand.


Major T. Osser

for The Department of Defence,


And here is the unedited message, with a helpful translation panel below.

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Screen Shot 2024-05-18 at 6.34.12 pm

The Bulletin Gets Serious, Let’s Hope It Lasts

Some green sprigs of maturity and professional attitude seem to sprouting down at the Bulletin. An instance is reporter Chris Burns, who the ‘Pie roundly criticised for his misjudgement of urging readers to vote for Jenny Hill in a NEWS story(not a opinion piece) on election day. Burns seems to have risen above that deceitful  disgrace in his new role as council watcher-in-chief, in itself a role for which the editor is to be commended, even if a little late in the day.

Believe this or not, this Burns article, with a little observational colour and restrained factual reporting – there is a remarkable and welcome absence of multiple adjectives –  is recommended reading and should have been a regular feature of the paper long before this.

Screen Shot 2024-05-18 at 11.32.53 am

Let’s hope this round-up became a regular spread, putting various issues in perspective and order  each council meeting. It will be a major step for the Bulletin to recognise that solid reporting of council matters should not be lazy parroting acceptance of Walker Street media releases, and that thoughtful, intelligent but colourful interesting detail is what a majority of readers not only deserve but would welcome. (This may sound a bit up-myself but it was exactly this approach that made the Law and Disorder column I wrote as court roundsman each week so popular. It put a human dimension into the workings of the remote and lofty world of the law. It will definitely work for politics … John Andersen has written some wonderful pieces about politics in this vein over the years. )

But Chris, as you recover from that shock of this unwanted endorsement, consider this: brush up on the entrenched failing of the Bulletin’s current crop of reporters , that of lacking curiosity and asking questions. An example is this story in the Weekend edition.

Screen Shot 2024-05-18 at 11.26.56 am

When you interview people, believe it or not,  you have to actually listen to what they say, so questions present themselves. Case in point – a  justifiably miffed Clynton Hawks told you  he was mulling over other options that ‘could include One Nation or the Libertarian Party’.

Pardon, the what party?  I

If someone is thinking of standing for it, best to know what it’s all about. Turns out this obscure fringe mob started its life way back in 2001 as the Liberal Democratic Party, and after a couple of decades hassling with other entitles and the electoral commission, settled on the Libertarian Party only last October,  so very few people. would know what Mr Hawks was talking about. And it’s a fair bet you didn’t, either, but didn’t ask..  This history offers not only insights into this mildly delusional conglomeration of ‘curate’s egg’  policies (good in parts) , but also the fact that it is not a registered party in Qld. If Mr Hawks is even considering joining its slender ranks of electoral no-hopers,it is handy for people to know the party policies.  They are included in the link but you’ll need a bit of time to wade through them.

The link provides would’ve had enough material for an interesting side-bar story. These are the little things that flesh out a good newspaper or information platform, not an endless parade of sick kids, dead accident victims (who funnily enough were all good blokes or women who lit up a room when they entered) and the opening of a new milk bar or coffee shop.

Anyway, enough of this, The Magpie is starting to bore himself now.

Perhaps If This New Attitude Continues At The Paper, It Will Avoid This Sort Of Embarrassment

Screen Shot 2024-05-18 at 6.56.03 pmMore than a day after the Australian broke the story,

Screen Shot 2024-05-14 at 10.20.49 am

….. the Bulletin picks it up, scooped in its own backyard, forced to play follow-my-leader – and it’s about their former pin-up girl.

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Seems your Jennykins doesn’t need you folks anymore.

And the absurdity of The Mullet’s rationale for seeking a cushy Canberra job is laughable – decrying the party’s penchant for ‘career politicians’.  This from a branch stacking, manipulative woman who has been nothing but a career politician for decades albeit at the most modest level of LG. She has already been soundly belted when she last had a tilt for federal glory, but the right wing of the Queensland Party must be as bare as a pensioner’s bank account if they’re now courting her.

Her attempt to get the nod from the backroom boys prompted this exchange in comments during the week.

J jones

Batman in Brisbane
Wonder Woman in Canberra

We are saved

 Say What? Some Quotes From The Week.

For the atheist Magpie, the Vatican is not his first stop for useful insights, but Pope Frankie has made an interesting point –  

Screen Shot 2024-05-18 at 9.45.20 am


…. although possibly verging on the hypocritical with the condemnation of being ‘closed up inside a ideological box’ … touch of pot/kettle, no?

And not a week goes by that the  inestimable Marina Hyde, the most informative and entertaining wordsmith on the planet, doesn’t have a quote worth remembering.  But this time,  our gal lifts the quote trophy high this week, when noting that serial creep and molester Russel Brand sought redemption from his sins with baptism in the polluted waters of the Thames:

marina hyde Screen Shot 2022-10-02 at 10.24.01 am

“I know it’s incredible: Thames Water (Authority) is no longer responsible for the biggest piece of shit in the river.”

And on the local scene, it kinda figures what state the town is in when we learn that the TCC’s arts supremo is Liam Mooney, whose main ‘art’ is that of Driveway Diplomacy’.

Screen Shot 2024-05-18 at 10.16.46 am

But Clr Mooney, The ‘Pie has a polite inquiry/observation about one of your quotes in the media release:  : “A city which has a thriving arts and culture sector is a city people want to live and visit.

“This is important as Council seeks to grow Townsville and future-proof the city,”

Question: As meaningless word salad buzz phrases go, there is the clear popularity winner in Walker Street, the good old  inanity ‘future proof the city’. So, if you flood proof a place, it means it stops floods, if you drought-proof a place, that means you build a year round pipeline supply (eventually) , if you fireproof something,  it means it can’t catch fire. So when you ‘future proof a city’, you are guaranteeing that it has no future?  If so, kudos to you, Jenny Hill and other ‘future proofers’ of the past decade, mission accomplished.

In The US, The T-Shirt Business Is Booming – Thanks To Trump

The slogans have been coming thick and fast, and while no one will beat ‘Did You know that two out of three Trump supporters are just as dumb as the other two?’,  (which has been pinched by Aussie protesters) here are a couple of additions this week.


And while The ‘Pie knows that reality is increasingly challenging satire, spare a thought for those in the business in the US.

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But they still had no shortage of subjects, especially THAT trial, the proposed Presidential debate and the worm that ate some of RFK’s brain (so he said himself).

Screen Shot 2024-05-17 at 9.10.52 am Screen Shot 2024-05-18 at 9.49.24 am Screen Shot 2024-05-17 at 9.12.13 am Screen Shot 2024-05-17 at 9.11.53 am Screen Shot 2024-05-16 at 8.08.49 am Screen Shot 2024-05-16 at 8.09.08 am Screen Shot 2024-05-16 at 8.09.29 am Screen Shot 2024-05-16 at 8.10.53 am Screen Shot 2024-05-18 at 9.48.18 am Screen Shot 2024-05-18 at 9.48.55 am Screen Shot 2024-05-18 at 9.50.45 am Screen Shot 2024-05-15 at 9.35.38 am Screen Shot 2024-05-15 at 9.36.02 am Screen Shot 2024-05-15 at 9.36.45 am Screen Shot 2024-05-15 at 9.33.12 am Screen Shot 2024-05-15 at 9.37.14 am

And With All Our Mayhem Going On Everywhere, Let’s End With A Bit Of Perspective.

Our home next to Jupiter.


Another week bites the dust, but comments continue 24/7, hop in and have your say. The donate button to help out with Nest costs is below. See you next week.

The Magpie's Nest is now more than five years old, and remains an independent alternative voice for Townsville. The weekly warble is a labour of love and takes a lot of time to put together. So if you like your weekly load of old cobblers, you can help keep it aloft with a donation, or even a regular voluntary subscription. Paypal is at the ready, it's as easy as ... well, easy as pie. Limited advertising space is also available.


  1. Dazza says:

    Hi magpie. Just a quick note, but the KAP might quibble on the Hawks v Ryder swap as he was to be their Thuringowa candidate and Ryder is the Townsville candidate

    • The Magpie says:

      Yupp, that was a whoopsie, now amended, The ‘Pie drop the occasional one when juggling chainsaws. Thanks for the heads up.

  2. Doug K says:

    Given the unanimous council vote to continue funding for the dying V8 Supercars weekend, it looks like business as usual for the TEL’s smoke and mirrors department.
    Can the Mayor or any councilor/s provide the one piece of information they should have demanded before approving more funds for the V8 Supercars – the attendance figures.
    Despite promises from V8s bosses, to my knowledge the Townsville public have still not been told the official crowd figures for the 2022 and 2023 events. Why?
    Aerial vision of the races over the past few years has indicated a serious decline in crowd numbers, with whole grandstands and a row of corporate boxes disappearing and the spectator mounds, which were packed in the first few years, appearing almost empty.
    TEL keeps telling us how many millions the V8s bring into Townsville but, as usual, don’t provide details on how their figures were arrived at.
    Townsville voted for change, but it looks like its more of the same waste.
    As for Kevin Gill’s hilarious mix up, referring to ex-PM Tony Abbott as Tony Mooney, how is he still chairman of TEL?
    As I understand it, the TEL constitution precludes it, so maybe he or the CEO can clear up these doubts.
    And Liam Scooter Mooney in charge of local arts!
    Stop it!

  3. Mike Douglas says:

    Pie , Chris Burns two page summary of the Council meeting was informative and balanced and I hope the Bully does this after every Council Meeting . The Bully reported last year aspects of remediation process North Rail Yards has already begun and like Qld Coutry Bank stadium land contaminated soil was transferred to a secure landfill site and treated . Re Margie Ryder and Jenny Hill senate, ( + current ex Team Hill Councillors ) . Are they confident their financial dealings Council won’t be flushed out by Mayor Thompson and deputy Jacobs of why they can’t deliver pre -election promises .

    • Ducks Nuts says:

      Mike, as clearly demonstrated by Thomstains’s handling of the question of his own service records, he barely has the political aptitude to flush the mayorall toilet.

  4. Achilles says:

    The same designation in Morse to ‘Pie’s in Semaphore.
    .-.. -.– .. -. –. / -.-. ..- -. -

  5. The Marconi Scientists says:

    I had the misfortune of encountering “margie” Ryder in the recent elections – she is easily one of the most toxic personalities I’ve met for a few years. Shadowing her must have been her sister (?) or at least a fellow coven associate, equally as two faced and poisonous like a green smoke grenade hurled by any budding super villain.

    As for the Katter Party, it’s a political fly trap – you see people getting involved with it but few get anywhere. Hawks would do well to simply stay away from the chalice of Katter party and politics in general. Any prospective voter for the Katter family and fellow travellers needs to ask themselves exactly what the katter party really stands for apart from filling their bank accounts with the tax payer dime. Katter is what could be considered as a proxy party of the labour party – a vote for katter is a vote to ensure Labor victory by vote splitting. One day Queensland will be rid of the pestilence of the “katter” party.

    • Bob Roberts says:

      There is no vote splitting with compulsory preferential voting.

    • Dave Nth says:

      The chance the LNP had in taking Townsville is now at an infinitesimal chance IMO. All Ryder will do is run spoiler like Dowling did in the Mayor’s races. I don’t think she has a good chance.

      Yes I have heard the rumours about her temperament, she lives out our way and the Rydweld ute is a common site in the northern suburbs.

      I also note Thuringowa is still vacant for a KAP candidate. So whose replacing Hawkes or why get rid of him? There a skeleton there which is unlike given his age or is that the problem with the internal polling?

      Anyway the way Miles has resorted to desperation tells me that Walker and Harpers freckles would be twitching at the moment. Both seats have a 3-4% margin that may not survive the election night swing.

  6. wollo says:

    Magpie I was in the signals many years ago but I havent forgotten how to decipher them.What it means is Two names, Two Dicks..You are a LYING BASTARD.

  7. The Magpie says:

    Thanks for the heads up, Not On Your Nelly Bay. Amended. Saturday’s are the longest day of the week in the Nest.

  8. wollo says:

    great U.S.A.cartoons this week Magpie.

  9. Lab Rat says:

    Hey Pie, what is your gmail address. I would like to send you a photo.

  10. Grumpy says:

    FFS!!! Another trite post of thirteen photographs of food and selfies of The Great Pretender and his child bride. What was amusing was his cack-handed attempt at assuring us he spends his own money when breakfasting on the weekend. I think – his poor syntax and bewildering sentence construction could be read a number of ways.

    Once again, the saccharine comments praising his “transparency “ (about what he had for breakfast?) is nauseating. However, when you look into his regular toadies, they are cookers, one and all.

  11. The Magpie says:


    This Crockett is smarter and verbally a more deadly SHOT than Davy ever was.

    Absolutely love this … can’t stop laughing, what a bitch slap, but through the rowdy scenes, the Republicans hypocrisy is laid bare …, especially from the totally unsavoury Marjorie Taylor Greene, who even looks like one imagine back-bar body odour would looks like.
    Check out this clip first , and just so you don’t have to replay it a dozen times to find out what Rep Crockett said, it’s this, which has already become a meme.


    Now, here’s the background to an inconsequential, but entertaining gotcha of some of the planet’s greatest hypocrites.

    Reckon this Crockett gal kilt her a bare when she was only three. Just like Davy.

  12. Southern Comfort says:

    Magpie, great read this week!!

    Also saw you had some interesting stuff in the comments section yesterday from last week’s Blog on TwoNames “possible” military service. I hope everyone goes back and has a read. You’ve definitely added some more feathers to the nest. And headaches for the small-brained.

  13. Prince Rollmop says:

    Has TCC done a risk assessment of transferring the failyards over to a council owned entity? Financial, operational, reputational assessment? Twonames has again received bad advice from his advisers as the failyards will be a financial black hole, I can assure you. Much ratepayer money will be tipped into this lemon. Standby for Claudia Bumme-smith and her femme fatale’s to praise this stupid investment.

    • Ducks Nuts says:

      Please dont credit Twonames with advisors or independent ideas of his own. This plan was already in place long before he came along.

      “Note Events after the reporting date Council incorporated North Rail Yard Developments Pty Ltd with a 100% shareholding in July 2023. This company will serve towards the delivery of the North Rail Yards project which is integral to achieving the outcomes sought for the City Waterfront Gateway Precinct. There were no material adjusting events after the balance date. ”

      See page 120


      • The Magpie says:

        Yes it was, and he told us he was going to get rid of it. If that’s not possible, why did he not know before he was elected? This bloke con from start to finish.

    • The Magpie says:

      You can bet the research for that story wasn’t done by TEL.

      • Echochamber says:

        Not so fast Pie. According to the Article

        “The visitor economy on the island reportedly generates around $380,000 million in economic output for businesses within North Queensland…”

        That’s $380 billion. About 23% of Australia’s GDP. All from Magnetic Island.

        So these sound like exactly the sort of numbers TEL would come up with. The same sort of numbers they probably provide to council to justify things like supporting the V8 supercars.

        • The Magpie says:

          Don’t get many jobs for your money.

        • The Magpie says:

          The visitor economy on the island reportedly generates around $380,000 million in economic output for businesses within North Queensland, creating 1746 jobs.

          Don’t get many jobs for your money nowadays, eh?

    • Prince Rollmop says:

      Jonesy, what about this piece from the article;

      “As the Destination Management Organisation for Townsville North Queensland, Townsville Enterprise is looking forward to being part of this next evolution for the island, which we know contributes $380.2 million to our visitor economy each year,” Mrs Woolfe said.

      TEL, under the stewardship of Claudia Bumme-smith and chairman Gill the dill, shouldn’t be part of anything that is meant to stimulate the economy as they are completely useless and are a total failure. All they do is go on road trips, visit places, post fluffy photos, and waste rate payer money on think-tank stupidity.

    • Jenny says:

      Complete tosh. No evidence drivel. Ferry and barges are packed. Just went to lunch in Horseshoe, the place is pumping. Real estate is off the wall. Who are these whining cretins? Fuckin’ Maggie Islanders, always moaning.

      • Maggie Moggie says:

        I take great offence to your comment ‘ Fuckin’ Maggie Islanders, always moaning.”
        The moggie has been productively working on Magnetic Island for over 3 decades now and YES the tourist season is down.

        As for us fuckin’ moaning – we do with good reason. No public toilets in Picnic Bay for over 3 years, the Picnic Bay Mall is a disgrace, the road over to Picnic Bay has been patched up so many times. No new sewerage connections, the Horseshoe Bay foreshore in unkept and shabby and the Radical Bay road to the 3 best bays on the island has a padlocked gate at the entrance ( all thanks to Cupcake & the Mullet).

        TEL is a useless waste of ratepayer dollars, wait till the try to introduce the visitor tax to Maggie as stated in the Magnetic Island Tourism Masterplan – that should really increase visitation numbers???

        The place is pumping? You don’t live here!

        • Maggie Deepthroat says:

          Cat Lover

          Your real identity is known to me and IMHO this version of Jenny is spot on with her observation….Maggie Islanders like you ARE always fucking moaning. Islanders receive more ratepayer funds per capita than any suburb in Townsville. You and your ilk are the most entitled bunch I’ve ever met. Your rates are already heavily subsidised by the rest of Townsville ratepayers (because the cost of doing business on MI dwarfs that of the mainland) and yet you behave as if you are the only suburb that has roads, public toilets, foreshores etc. in need of repair. Newsflash DD. You don’t think each Councillor actively advocates for spending in their division, only to have to face the reality that they work with an operational arm tasked with allocating a scarce resource to its best and most efficient use. While we’d all love to see overdue projects completed, the more reasonable of us with a stake in Magnetic Island appreciate this and rationally engage with our local councillor as opposed to flinging shit at them from 100 paces, which seems to be your MO.

          By the way, Jenny Hill’s comment during the election about King Solomon, even though you took offense, was spot on. From what I have seen, a large contingent of regular MIRRA meeting attendees would rather see the surviving baby cut in half than bear the thought of any sort of compromise on any issue. For gods sake, you have MIRRA, MICTA and MINCA and you can’t even talk to each other civilly.

          And all the while, 80% of Magnetic Islanders go about their daily business, commuting, working, living, loving, contributing, connecting and embracing all that wonderful MI has to offer, including beautiful secluded beaches that are worth the effort of getting to on bike or on foot.

          • The Magpie says:


          • Maggie Moggie says:

            Maggie Deepthroat,
            Who the fuck is MITCA?

          • Jenny says:

            Maggie Moggie, who the fuck is MIRRA Inc? According to the Australian Business Register, the Magnetic Island Ratepayers and Residents Association Inc (note the arrangement of the words) ABN 49 547 706 849 was active from 1 March 2021. What date was the other MIRRA “formed”?

          • Maggie Moggie says:

            Maggie Deepthroat,

            FYI there is more than just one cat lover on the island – there’s hundreds of us. Nice guess on my identity – but for a super slueth – you haven’t got a clue.

            As for unfinished projects on the islands – FYI 2 TCC budgets ago they had funding for new toilet block at Picnic Bay – which still haven’t been built??
            The road over to Picnic has been fixed 3 times now and all of them were botched jobs – all paid for the ratepayer monies.
            I could go on but seeing your so engaged with island you would know all of un finished projects.

            You even support the former Mayor’s outrageous comment about our community and ‘Solomons Child’.
            Sadly you don’t even know the four community groups names or that representatives of each group meet on a bi monthly basis to discuss issues.

            You state that ‘80% of islanders are happy to bicycle or walk to seculded bays so the padlocked gate on the Radical Bay rd is OK by you. That statement shows just how out of touch and selfish you are. No care for the elderly or people with disabilities who would also love to visit those secluded bays.

            So Deepthroat on your bike…

          • Jenny says:

            MM, as a cat lover you might like to take a look at this recent scientific paper on toxoplasmosis on Magnetic Island:


          • The Magpie says:

            This won’t endear The ‘Pie to many, but he agrees that Magnetic Island should be cat free. Cats are an even greater pest and danger to Australian wildlife than cane toads. In a closed island environment (cats don’t swim in the general sense), wallabies possums and birdlife must come first.

            And it would be trite and wrong in the case of cats to trot out the old saw usually applied to dog owners: there is no such thing as a bad dog,
            just bad owners. Comparing the housing, maintenance and control over a cat is a different galaxy to having and training a dog. (BTW one of the greatdelusions of mankind is ever thinking he ‘owns’ a cat … felines tolerate us for what they get in return. Drop dead in your house and after three days, Tiddums will start finding you quite tasty.)

            While it is indisputable that cats can become endearing to the owners, offering companionship and company, and itwould be virtually impossible to ban them on the Big island (mainland), it comes down to the greater good in an environment like Magnetic Island.

            The Magpie will now will don his crash helmet and await the paw slashing responses.

      • Jenny says:

        Worse still, who is the Maggie Island local, ex-Bulletin identity providing bigoted inaccurate swill to the Cairns Post to pass on to the trash merchants on BileAfterDark? There is no “push” by the Queensland government to re-name the Island National Park to Yunbenun – they are required by law to do it. The re-naming is the end result of an Indigenous Land Use Agreement (ILUA) struck with the Wulgurukaba Traditional Owners in the Native Title Tribunal more than ten years ago. There is a particular irony. That identity is a long time executive member of MIRRA, the local community group formed to critically scrutinise, if not outright oppose, the Native Title claim. MIRRA became a formal Party to the claim, interfered at every turn and stuck with it to the bitter end, ultimately being signatories to the legally binding settlement encapsulated in the ILUA. One of the terms of the ILUA is that the Wulgurukaba have exclusive naming rights over the Island National Park. MIRRA signed away their options years ago. They have no shame, no conscience, no principles.

        • Ducks Nuts says:

          Jenny.. there really is no pleasing you is there. Seriously, get a hobby and grow some flowers, paint your house, volunteer at a charity, play lawn bowls or smoke some marijuana, just do something.

        • Maggie Moggie says:

          MIRRA which stands for Magnetic Island Resident and Ratepayers Assoc Inc. was formed long before the Native Title Claim.

          As for the renaming of National Park on Magnetic Island why did DES publish this notice:
          Public Notice Proposed renaming of Magnetic Island National Park The Department of Environment, Science and Innovation (the department) is proposing to rename Magnetic Island National Park
          to Yunbenun National Park. Yunbenun is the preferred name of the Wulgurukaba Traditional Owners of Magnetic Island National Park. It is important to note that this proposal relates to the National
          Park, not the name of the island itself. The department is seeking comments from the public and interested groups about the proposed renaming. Comments on the proposed name change should
          be returned to:
          email hidden; JavaScript is required
          or North Tropical Coast Management Unit Queensland Parks and Wildlife Service
          and Partnerships Department of Environment,
          Science and Innovation
          22 Hurst Street, Picnic Bay,
          Magnetic Island QLD

          DES response:

          Thank you for taking the time to provide comment on the proposed renaming of Magnetic Island National Park to Yunbenun National Park. The Department of Environment, Science and Innovation has received your email, and your comment will be considered as part of this public consultation process.

          DES also refer people to Charles Price book in 1885 and the
          another written by Mark Donohue in 2007. Price’s book says the name ‘Yoonbanoon’ or the Donohue’s book says ‘Yunbanun’

          So Yunbenun is not the correct spelling.

          Why have public consultation if the Wulgurukabba have exclusive naming rights?
          Also questions were asked about whether people would have to pay to enter the National Park and what will happen to the the name of Magnetic Island’s highest mountain peak Mt. Cook seems no one is prepared to answer those questions including DES. It’s all very well to say it’s only the National Park – but that encompasses 75% of the island and most islanders do not want the name changed for various reasons, whether they are MIRRA members or not.

          • OED says:

            There can be different ways of spelling non English words. Beijing and Peking are both attempts to represent the sound of 北京. Saying it’s the wrong spelling is silly.

        • The Magpie says:

          Your assertion that the proposed name change is compulsory -‘required by law’ – is going to come as a big surprise to the DESI.

          The department is seeking comments from the public and interested groups about the proposed renaming of Magnetic Island National Park to Yunbenun National Park. The Department of Environment, Science and Innovation (the department) is proposing to rename Magnetic Island National Park to Yunbenun National Park.19 Apr 2024

          And while you derisively attack Mary Vernon, who lives there and you don’t, you appear to be pushing the barrow for a wider agenda regarding name changes around the state.

          The Magpie’s view is that Magnetic Island/Yunbenun presents the ideal opportunity for two cultures to come together in harmony and, for that matter, reality … if the official designation became ‘Yunbenun National Park on Magnetic Island’ … thus honouring the indigenous history as well as the more recent European history in the combined names.

          Simples, no?

          And BTW, the government may have changed Fraser Island to something forgettable, but changing the name of Magnetic Island would, The ‘Pie imagines, meet with greater pushback … it would be a marketing and economic disaster in the name of a minority agenda.

          • Jenny says:

            A nod is as good as a wink to a blind man.

          • The Magpie says:

            Translation: I’m lost for a sensible reply, so will go down the cliche path just to keep talking. You’re getting as crabby as any jenny in the mangroves.

          • Jenny says:

            Magpie, even a fleeting visit to Maggie will demonstrate a couple of things some locals don’t seem to know about: 1) irregardless of the Moggie’s opinion, there are public toilets in Picnic Bay – okay, they might be slap-up temporary things but at least they are there, and have been for quite a while, 2) there was an “ideal opportunity for two cultures to come together in harmony and, for that matter, reality”, when the Native Title process was concluded, peacefully and graciously by all the parties about 2012. A decade later some of the MIRRA group decided to make it their prerogative to fuck around with the name of the park, the spelling, the etymology and anything else they felt like in either spoilsport arrogance or complete ignorance of their previous undertakings inside the Native Title Tribunal, 3) the fact that MV lives on the Island is no indicator of her credentials for telling the Cairns Post that the renaming of the park is “meaningless”. The MIRRA group she associates with gave their formal assent to the Wulgurukaba to name the National Park whatever they liked in recognition of their long standing custodianship. That has meaning for the Traditional Owners, the Wulgurukaba. Recognition. It’s a big word, even for a so-called writer.

          • The Magpie says:

            Only part of that worth a Magpie comment is the fact that the public toilets at Picnic Bay are slap-up temporary ones and have been for quite a while’ is your unwitting but valid criticism of our council and Ma Greaney. Since they love to witter on about the beauty, value and high visitor numbers, is is simply a disgrace that the TCC tolerate temporary bogs at our most attractive and income-earning area.

  14. Jenny says:

    So now you are all whinging because Mayor Thompson posts photos of his food choices? Is that the worst thing Troy can do? There is no pleasing you sooks. Seriously, get a hobby and grow some flowers, paint your house, volunteer at a charity, play lawn bowls or smoke some marijuana, just do something. This blog is obsessed with local Councillors. Seriously.

    • The Magpie says:

      That’s just plain silly.

    • Grumpy says:

      No, Jenny – not whinging, just making observations upon his cringeworthy gaucherie and lack of competency or willingness to do his job. Also the blind stupidity and naivety of his moronic followers.

      • The Magpie says:

        Well, hang on there, Grumps. The ‘Pie is following him. Closely. Every fucking move.

      • Jenny says:

        And who asked for your comment Grumpy? You are all going to look like idiots because Mayor Thompson DOES have a service record and all will be revealed shortly. You are all silly old men with nothing better to do.

        • Jenny says:

          There is more than one “Jenny” commenting on this blog but frankly, I don’t give a damn.

          • The Magpie says:

            Thencall yourself Rhett Butler. Problem solved.

          • Grumpy says:

            Well, Jenny, you certainly look like a silly old moo now, don’t you? It was never in doubt that he was a weekend warrior, (and thus had a “service record” – of sorts) but it is now established that he embellished his record with gusto. No SAS, no special forces sig unit. Despicable behaviour by a mentally unstable psychotic and, so it now appears, a compulsive liar.

            Lucky you. You got to read my comment for free.

        • The Magpie says:

          Personally, as an old journalist and truth teller, The Magpie can think of nothing better to do than to hold the powerful and the wannabes to account. That involves keeping them honest, a concept widely held in public offices but apparently beyond your limited, biased and possibly paid comprehension.

          But hope the military stuff gets cleared up soon, so we can get on to the far more interesting question of how 20 something gas fitter in Perth who did some patchy apparently reservist time in army kitchens and then tried for two uni degrees but failed both, and still ended up in charge a multi-million defaulting company Europe.

          And here’s a newsflash for you, Jenny … no matter that you have notions of censorship, the answer to your opening question is …The Magpie. The Nest is open to all commenters, even you (although not always). Grumpy has been around these climes from the blog’s inception, you’ve been here five seconds. The ‘Pie does not appreciate you biting your bottom lip when found to be a fuckwit and making lame attempts to decree who can reply to your partisan inanities.

        • Not running for mayor says:

          Jenny, do you have an ETA for this release of service record which you confidently state Twodicks has? Tick tock, tick tock.

    • J jones says:

      Still awaiting an answer to my question to you on what he has achieved so far?

    • ABS says:

      It’s a local blog, Jenny.

    • Jeff, Condon says:

      Jenny, when I posted the same comment, I was hit with a tirade of abuse. It was then gently explained to me that this is a blog primarily concerned with Townsville issues. It occasionally stretches to to MI and the northern beaches. The only issues discussed here are about Townsville or those that directly affect Townsville. As such, the TCC is regarded as a big fish to the minnows nibbling at it.

      As I was told, if you dislike the blog, fuck off. Or, you can be like Grumpy who trolls Twonames FB on a daily basis so he has something to whine about.

      Quite a while ago I used to learn quite a lot about Townsville from this blog and expect I will do so again once the current obsession has passed.

      Okay, Magpie, swoop your worst.

      • The Magpie says:

        Your inability to absorb knowledge and information is your problem, not The Magpie’s.

        And please note again this is not FB. The Magpie does not tell people to fuck off, he fucks them off.

  15. Rocky says:

    Went to look at a house to purchase today for my daughter who is relocating. Place was full of people . Offers over $379k were required and was advised they were receiving offers with a 4 at the start.

    After purchasing a property in 2009 at the top of the last boom I started to think our purchase might just be back to the same value some 15 years later.

    Appears Townsville is in a full correction swing after so many bad years going backwards and sideways.

    • Prince Rollmop says:

      Rocky, places like Townsville, Rockhampton, and Gladstone have been slow to catch up with the national rise in house/unit values, but they have started moving in the past 3 to 6 months. People are being priced out of the big cities and are looking to either invest or relocate to regional centres. It has been inevitable that Townsville would eventually become part of the realestate price catchup, and things are now starting to move. It’s more of a correction as prices have remained below average for a number of years and they are now starting to climb towards a price point where they should already sit.

      Word of note; any price increase is NOT due to any work TEL or TCC (incl Mayor Thompstain) have done. It’s due to the post-COVID environment.

      • Not running for Mayor says:

        The price correction locally is also being driven by the knowledge that 500 dwellings are required for ADF in the next year, so the market will explode when that need is realised. Local builders are not going to be able to meet demand for that number of new properties.

        • Rocky says:

          Yeah i certainty didnt attribute the rise to anything other than catch up based on national prices.

          Wife advised me the house is under conditional contract of $480k……

    • White Mouse says:

      I wish that optimism applied to units as well – just sold a unit for $20k less than what we paid for it 10 years ago.

  16. Fox Mulder says:

    I wonder how long this gift courtesy of TCC Facebook Page will stay up for:

    Look in Comments, scroll down to Luke Smith tagging Bob Optics. Then look at Bob Optics reply.

    Reminds me of a line from the old X-Files show. The Truth Is Out There!

    (Magpie edit:)
    To save all that fucking around, you mean this.

    • Achilles says:

      Luv the invitation to share “thoughts and experiences” OK lets all take up that invitation and share our service number, with the proviso; I’ll show you mine if you show me yours……you first!

    • Burnt Brows says:

      Question – has anyone who served in the ADF with Birnbrauer actually come forward to confirm he was enlisted? Only asking because all the retired ADF personnel I know always seem to know and talk about just about everyone who was ever enlisted.

    • Fox Mulder says:

      Nope. I meant the bit with his alleged actual service. Not his alleged campaign service. I meant the comment above this one from Bob. Sorry!!

    • Line pilot says:

      I believe the good Mayor. Why would he make a Facebook post with specific details, as outlined in this blog, if he didn’t serve in those areas? I think it takes time to request and then receive the relevant paperwork as hard evidence. The Mayor is doing that. The government works very slowly. Cut the guy some slack. Stop being unaustralian.

      • The Magpie says:

        So at best, exaggerating and seeking some stolen valour glory for political purposes IS being Australian in your books.

        Get a grip.

      • Not Achilles says:

        Line pilot: Shades of Sammy Johnson suits your pious attempt to shield your idol from criticism.
        sic “unaustralian” The last refuge of the scoundrel is patriotism.

      • Grumpy says:

        Pencil Head – have you forgotten that “interview” where he clearly claimed to have been in the SAS?

        Or the email where he claimed to have two university degrees?

        Does anyone really believe that this dropkick actually worked for the US Department of Homeland Security.? Or that they would not have rigorously checked his employment history?

        Do we just forget his DV history?

        Christ, are you mob really that stupid?

      • Not standing for mayor says:

        Line Pilot. You ask “Why would he make a Facebook post with specific details, as outlined in this blog, if he didn’t serve in those areas?” The simple answer is that Two Names, Twofaces, Twodogs, is a lying shit who knows no other way than to deceive and hustle his way through life rather than do an honest days work like the rest of us.

        In this blog other Cookers have said that the military record has been received but where the fuck is it? Your hero couldn’t lie straight in bed mate – you seriously need a better class of conman to be your hero.

        • wollo says:

          You are right Not the Mayor ,two dicks/ two names has made a complete arsehole of himself and he is not that clever either.Most conmen eventually have to leave town because they wear out their welcolme. How many places has he lived ? Fancy telling bullshit lies about his military career in a Garrison city like Townsville where there are thousands of serving and retired servicemen and women.If he was in Mt. Isa or Rockhampton , or Chareleville nobody would give a shit .I have watched the 1st couple of council meetings and he hasnt got a clue how to run a meeting and its obvious that he has never been in Apex or Rotary but then again conmen like him woudnt join unless there was a quid in it for them.

      • Jatzcrackers says:

        Line Pilot, it appears you’re doing too many lines ! You ‘think’ it takes time to request the and receive the relevant information and the Government moves slowly ?
        Let me enlighten you while you’re doing lines off your dining room table, because you’re surely not smart enough to be a line check captain.

        Past ADF personnel seeking their service number/details, simple bang out a quick email (with accompanying ID) to ADF requesting same.
        ADF respond with appropriate email suppling requested record including service number within max 30 days but in majority of cases much sooner.

        Twonames has been banging on for well over a month now about requesting the required service number intel and it’s doubtful the seasoned con man has even made the request as he already knows what the response will be.

        • Southern Comfort says:

          You also need to take into consideration that when ADF get “motivated”, they really pull out their finger to get things done. And nothing motivates them more than questions about Stolen Valour.

          I suspect 30 days was never the max time they would take. For the right individual it probably took them 30 minutes, including their coffee break, to get this job ticked off their todo list.

          • The Magpie says:

            So, deducting the coffee break time, for the right individual it would take 30 seconds?

        • ABS says:

          Exactly – we have no proof that he actually applied for the documents. How hard is it to share a copy of his email and the response he got.

        • Russell says:

          Not sure it’s that easy for Reservists Jatz. I’ve been trying to get mine for a while now without success. What is the email address within ADF to which you refer, please?

          • I’ll be plucked says:

            So you’ve forgotten your service ID too Russell, something you have in common with the two bit shyster Twonames/twofaces/twobit.

            Did you compare notes with him when you met recently??? :(

          • Not standing for mayor says:

            Literally a 2 second google search:

            All enquiries should be directed to: Defence Archives GPO Box 225 QUEENSCLIFF VIC 3225 Email: email hidden; JavaScript is required. In addition, you can access DVA records under Australia’s freedom of information law, you have a right to access the documents DVA holds.

          • Not standing for mayor says:

            Specifically for reserve personnel (another 3 seconds invested):

            Ex-members Service Records, including Certificates of Service for Reserve personnel, may be obtained from Defence Archives using form AE824 Request for Records, a copy of which can be accessed here. This is a smart form and additional fields will open depending on the options you choose. Note that the DRA plays no part in the processing of this form.

            An explanation of the application processes may also be found at the following link:


          • Kenny Kennett says:

            I call bullshit!!

          • Jatzcrackers says:

            Nice try Russell. Google !

      • Jeff, Condon says:

        From my service time, requests usually took a standard six weeks, ie, 30 business days. Take into account weekends, plus snail mail = six weeks. The scavengers are gathering for the hoped decaying carcass.

        • Trollseeker says:

          Wake up Jeff, you are not a newly elected Politician and there is (hopefully) not a question of stolen valor hanging over your head. You can wait. As a Public Servant I can tell you this would have been investigated by someone at the ADF before they went on their first smoko break.

  17. Authoritarian says:

    So who came up with the name ‘Australia’? Is it an indigenous name? And if it isn’t, what should it be renamed to? I mean they are changing the location names of towns, places, and locations to indigenous names so why not rename our Australia to an indigenous name? Might as well, considering this world is so obsessed with so-called early custodians of the land.

    • Achilles says:

      How about an amalgam like Cookaburra

    • Burnt Brows says:

      Can’t be done. Indigenous people in Australia have 200 languages and 800 dialects. There are local names but I am not aware of just one commonly accepted name for all of Australia. It would be too expensive in any case – imagine having to amend all those ‘Made in Australia’ stickers ……

      • The Magpie says:

        Interesting point, if slightly obvious. No indigenous group has objected to being called First Australians, no doubt for the reason you lay out.

        Personally, just wish translation of many place names in English didn’t result in such long, linguistically jawbreaking and in many cases, ugly words.

  18. Grumpy says:

    Nice attempt at diversion, TwoNames. The day your lies about your military service are exposed, you come up with a “poor me” post about your epilepsy, complete with video.

    You pathetic, creepy loser.

    • Southern Comfort says:

      Grumpy, when you can’t deny, you distract. From the book “Conmen and other grubby hobbies” available at TwoNames night reading table. I’m assuming he can read, it’s hard to tell from what he writes.

  19. Active Measures says:

    Adding another million migrants will do wonders for Australia ( for as long as the brand name Australia exists). It will keep labor in power, it will keep the economy strong, it will keep house prices strong. If you don’t like high house prices you can always leave – real estate developers and real estate agents have no need for you here. Remember , you have no right to be here unless you are useful to vote labor , work for the government or are of use to the real estate industry . Keep voting for your doom fools !

    • Prickster says:

      It’s quite ridiculous that Albo forces Ministers to divest shares due to conflict-of-interest concerns, yet allows them to retain investment properties https://www.pmc.gov.au/sites/default/files/resource/download/code-of-conduct-for-ministers.pdf

      The biggest owners of shares are Superannuation Funds caring for the retirements of hard-working Australia’s.

      I’d like to see pollies own more shares to make sure our super funds perform. Not the Albo cares about super, he’ll retire on Prime Minister’s annual pension of more than $400,000.

      • The Magpie says:

        Hello, corruption, my old friend, we’ve come to visit with you again.

      • Bullshit says:

        All politicians should be made to divest their investments except for an ASX tracking ETF. That way if the economy is doing well generally so will they.

    • The real ziptied helmet says:

      The slow march towards communism. Although it’s speeding up with Labor/Greens in charge

  20. Southern Comfort says:

    Another day, another meaningless look at TwoNames diary.

    – Training for Townsville Local Disaster Management Group

    I don’t know why he needs so much Training on managing to be a disaster. He’s a natural!!

    • I’ll be plucked says:

      SC, I wonder WTF twonames/twofaces does between 5am-8am to ‘train’. This is absolute fucking bullshit and aligns with conman’s other lying, bullshiting behaviour. Does this bloke have a mental disorder???

      • The Magpie says:

        You have to ask?

      • Ducks Nuts says:

        At a wild guess it’s not F2F training and he’s been told to familiarise himself with procedures for LDMG.
        In other words, he’s reading a manual. Slowly.

        • Cluden Axe says:

          The clown is also publishing his daily lesson from the How To Be A Mayor For Dummies handbook on his facebook page. There are no people or clocks or calendars in his work social media posts which makes me wonder whether he just got someone to go around and take a bunch of photos which he or his crooked squeeze media advisor add to the random posts.

        • Alahazbin says:

          Yes Ducky, we don’t want another RRD episode.

    • The real ziptied helmet says:

      Learning how to be a Mayor isn’t a two second job.. It will require a lot of training and familiarisation.

      • The Magpie says:

        Shouldn’t t that be seriously studied before and during a candidature? If you were serious and responsible, and not just a barroom blowhard? A medium level business person, a retired legal person (they’d have to be retired, or they couldn’t afford the pay cut) or someone with accountancy skills as well a a proven track record in community activity would be able to pick up the basic requirements within the first week.

        • The real ziptied helmet says:

          Yes you’re right. Anyone applying for a job needs to prove their experience and qualifications otherwise they won’t get a look in. However, it seems like to be a politician you don’t need any experience or qualifications, and you can just misrepresent and even fake them. So doesn’t that suggest an issue with the system?

          • The Magpie says:

            No, not really. If you misrepresent them or fake them, you are quickly challenged, and anywhere else, someone found out with even a shred of ethics and morals (as well as self-esteem) would resign for lying.

    • Peter heater says:

      How long will Thompson keep up this childish posting of his daily activities? What an embarrassment. Does he document in his diary what time he will take his daily dump or at what times he takes a piss? What a demented and silly individual he is.

    • Oh Waldo says:

      Seriously, what is wrong with mayor shonk. What an idiot, posting irrelevant shit like his daily routine or what hamburger he ate last night. Troy, get a life and grow up dude, you are a freak.

      • The real ziptied helmet says:

        I hope you’re not jelous of our new Mayor. He’s got a long time left so expect a lot more foodie instagram posts.

        • I’ll be plucked says:

          Zip, he’s giving Food Trucks Greaney a run for her title! She is the culinary queen of food trucks in Flinders St! I wonder if she will push back? :)

        • Grumpy says:

          Zips. Betting at the RSL bar last night was that he’d be gone within 18 months. He may have seriously underestimated the defence community’s outrage at and contempt for his blatant lies regarding his service history. Poor judgment, which does not bode well for the future of our city.

          • The Magpie says:

            Shit, that long? The ‘Pie is obviously not doing his job properly.

          • Grumpy says:

            That estimate was formulated on the basis that he will not go voluntarily and shall keep a tight grip on them bananas. He lacks the grace, dignity and honour to resign when exposed.

          • wollo says:

            I would like to be a fly on the wall if 2 names 2 dicks had the guts to walk into the R.S L.Club and go into the Members Bar at anout 4 o-clock on a Friday arvo and introduce himself to the old diggers there and offer to buy them a beer.You would hear 2 calls Over the P.A…first for the security and the second one for an Ambulance…I bet he woudnt be going back for his HAT when he gets out of Hospital !!

    • Burnt Brows says:

      The Mayor, in his defence, does a LOT more than his diary suggest. Please see below as to what I believe it may really looks like (just speculation) –

      BUSY DAY:
      Everyday is fantastic to see.
      – Training for Local Disaster Management Group. Delete FB comments asking for ADF service record.
      – Meeting with Executive Assistant to run through the day. Delegate staff to delete FB comments asking for ADF service record.
      – Procurement discussion. Delete FB comments querying Uni qualifications.
      – Budget Workshop
      11:00am Delete FB comments asking for ADF service record.
      – Weekly discussion with Wildy
      11:30am. Delete FB comments asking for ADF service record.
      – Budget Workshop
      – Budget Talks with Councillors. Delete FB comments asking for ADF service record.
      – Preparation for evening engagement and presentations with Executive Assistant. Check posts on Townsville Magpie. Delete FB comments asking for ADF service record.
      – Discussion with Federal Member
      5:30pm. Respond to posts on Townsville Magpie under an Alias. Delete FB comments asking for ADF service record.
      – Volunteering Reception. Delete FB comments asking for ADF service record.

      • Southern Comfort says:

        I know it’s unusual of me, in his defence, I saw him reply to one of these FB comments on the weekend. And he left it and the reply up for 2!whole days. Then I think his lawyer might have called him on Monday morning and told him to delete it. Because it was gone quite quickly after business hours commenced.

        I’m assuming TwoNames legal counsel charges extra for out of hours. And he blew that budget when he disappeared sick for the 3 days when he most likely received his letter. I’m assuming Crisis Talks and Legal Advice down south on the glitter strip. Wonder if he took the squeeze, because he always turns to ex-wife Birnbrauer when in trouble. I’m not sure how he’d manage that room with current squeeze and Mrs Birnbrauer.

        • Grumpy says:

          SC – I, too, noticed the clean up of his FB posts on Monday. Whoever is advising him is plotting a very dangerous course.

          • The Magpie says:

            Given what we have observed from his personality and behaviour, The ‘Pie has wondered if he actually has any personal strategic advice apart from his ‘let them eat cake if their starved of information’ and crash or crash through bluster. “I’m just getting on with the job of being mayor’ is an obstinate refusal to behave normally in such circumstances, and it is not the line from a person with the interests of the community at heart.

            Of course, if he’s got some of the MyPlace cookers advising him, ehhe really is doubly rooted.

  21. Prickster says:

    So The Albanese government this week decreased the permanent migration intake 185,000 in 2024-25.

    This still means around Australia we need to build a new Townsville every year.

    All the houses, schools, police stations, hospitals, shops, roads, sewerage, water supply, and the list goes on and on and on. Little wonder we’re screwed.

    • Achilles says:

      Does that mean that we have to clone a Thomson Mayor for each new “Townsville” too?
      That’s a hell of a lot of fairy dust!

    • Active Measures says:

      Its ok you can just make water and power more expensive, that makes people use less of it. You don’t need more police or prison because you can just let criminals go, shove some cash into the hands of judges and legal Eagles and with a nod and a wink everything will be legal. You can offload patients in the corridors of hospitals if there’s a health crisis, maybe increase the Medicare levy to really sock it to them. The future is fucked and it will be glorious. Don’t get too excited , you won’t see much real change next election.

      • Southern Comfort says:

        If that’s your “OK” vision, could you please tell us your “Not OK” vision please? Its after 10PM and I think I’m allowed scary nighttime stores now.

  22. Doug K says:

    Re the mayor’s disaster training:
    First rule is not to open the dam gates on high tide. For experienced advice call Jenny Hill.

    • Jenny says:

      Doug, for really experienced INDEPENDENT advice about the operation of Ross River dam in a flood try:


      Spoiler alert: it has bugger all to do with high tide.

      • Not running for mayor says:

        Jenny, spoiler alert to to your spoiler alert. This has been done to death here and in the broader media. The TOR for this report were specifically designed to exclude all of the contributing factors of the event and these TOR were vigously opposed by many in council at the time of the commission. This is only worth the paper it is printed on as bogroll.

        • Jenny says:

          “…these TOR were vigously opposed by many in council at the time of the commission”.

          Opposed by whom? Councillors? Staff? Name one term of reference that was opposed. Better still, how did the TOR “exclude all of the contributing factors of the event?” ALL of them! That’s just ridiculous. Have you even read the report?

          • Alahazbin says:

            Jenny, The report was produced to protect your fucking namesake. Puddleduck could see what was going to happen and handed over control of the dam two days before the fuckup.

          • Jenny says:

            Alahazbin, what you have outlined, without a skerrick of evidence or logic, is a theory, a conspiracy theory. Think about it for one second. In your pet theory-world, a politician (the premier) can find a science/engineering company to collect data from BOM, various engineering companies and other consultants and write up a report on the numerous week-long components of a concise weather event – as a lie. All the data is publicly available. Several people put their signatures and professional reputations on the line. It is a public document which any half-wit can access. You think they can make 1+1=3 and no one will notice. Either you can’t read, won’t read or got stuck near the beginning of the Old Testament. Just read the bloody report and learn something.

          • Jenny says:

            Alahazbin, in your tortured conspiracy nightmare you also claim that “Puddleduck could see what was going to happen and handed over control of the dam two days before the fuckup” (being the flood event I presume?)

            The premier was never in “control” of the Ross River Dam and you must know that. Jenny Hill was chair of the Disaster Management Group long before the 2019 Townsville flood. Evidence? The TCC 2019 Monsoon Trough Rainfall and Flood Review (31 March 2019) states:

            “On 8 January 2019, TCC were informed that 24 hour monitoring of the RRD had commenced. In the period from 8 January 2019 until 28 January 2019, the TLDMG (through its Chair – Mayor Jenny Hill), the LDCC (through the LDC) and the Townsville City Council Emergency Response Group (through Mr Mike Chiodo) monitored the weather and related intelligence from a variety of advice sources”.

            Later it states:

            “Based on the hydrological analysis that has been subsequently conducted in the time available, the RRD experienced rainfalls and flood volumes over a 7 day period (from 29 January 2019 to 5 February 2019) that exceeded a “1,000 year” event.”

            You don’t need to make stuff up when all the facts are laid out for you on the public record.

          • Not running for Mayor says:

            Oh Jenny, if you weren’t so far up your own ideological arse you’d see how laughable your coments are. But bless you for trying to keep up with the big kids.

  23. Russell says:

    All good Chaps. Thanks for the info. Enquiry sent. Nothing to do with the current Mayor, timing is coincidental.
    And Plucker, I’d be surprised if any CMF member from the Vietnam era would remember his service number. My father could recite his WW2 service number until he died at 98 and he served a very long time ago. Different situation from mine.

  24. Jeff, Condon says:

    Magpie, 21May24, 5.35 pm: Doesn’t using the words politician, morals and ethics create an oxymoron?

  25. Liz says:

    I love how the majority of Mayor Golden’showers goon club have stopped posting on here. It seems that as the weeks roll by they are too busy to defend the indefensible. Farewell zealots.

  26. Doug K says:

    Jenny (is that you, former mayor and disaster controller?)
    I think the residents of Idalia would argue against the findings of a Labor kangaroo inquiry.
    If you’re trying to make excuses for past disasters it ain’t working.
    You’ve got form on this blog.

    • Jenny says:

      Doug, the residents of Idalia have had their chance and are silent. Some would have been insured. More probably are now. Townsville got flogged in an extraordinary flood event that no one could have prepared for. The experts did their best but the dam was overwhelmed in a freakish event. At least the wall was not breached and no one died through the actions or inactions of others.

      • The Magpie says:

        It is worth noting here that your point about the dam wall holding was partly due to a highly secretive program instigated by His Radiance (former mayor Tony Mooney to newcomers here). That is secretive in the true purposes of works that were being carried out more than 20 years ago. It was in a highly dangerous situation and the works were played well down, the public relations handled very professionally bThe Magpie’s close friend (the late) Ron Bairstow, who confided in the Magpie at the time. The real fear was creating alarm and panic if the true nature of the problem was fully exposed.

      • Doug K says:


      • Not running for Mayor says:

        The dam was created to avoid a repeat of the flooding event of 1948(I think that was the year) which saw vast areas of Townsville and Thuringowa inundated. The first time the city had a similar event after the dam was built, it comprehensively failed to do its job and the city flooded in the same places and to about the same depths.

        As you are so closely aligned with TCC, you would be familiar with the Flood Level Pink scenario which we came perilously close to in 2019.Nothing like a 5m high wall of water washing through Kirwan to wake people up.

        1948 was a natural disaster, 2019 was a man (or Jenny) made disaster where we skated mass casualties through luck not management.

        • Alahazbin says:

          NrfM, Re the 1948 floods, a levy bank was put in along the northern side around Mundingburra to prevent future flooding in that area and it worked.
          But then in his time as mayor, His Radiance and his team gave approval for a developer doing a new subdivision at the end of Thompson St remove it so potential buyer could have better river views.
          Then Jenny let the the 280% of water out 2hrs before high tide in 2019.

  27. Ducks Nuts says:

    This delusionary imbecile and his equally delusional social media manager, wants us to believe that he’s having a media meeting at 6:30am.

    The only media meeting he’s having at 6:30am is a snog with his squeeze who manages his social media accounts.


    As always I am looking forward to a great day ahead.

    – Catch up on correspondence in the office

    – Media agenda meeting

    – Meeting with the CEO

    – Meeting with the Executive Assistant to prepare for the day ahead

    – Meeting with Mitez

    – Meeting with Townsville Enterprise board

    – Council Budget workshop

    – Meeting with Royal Flying Doctors Service

    – Citizenship Ceremony

    – Reconciliation discussion

    – Family time followed by dinner with Michelle

    Hope you have a great day.

    #wednesday #townsvillecitycouncil #adayinthelife #myschedule #dailyplanning

    • The Magpie says:

      Please,please,please tell me this is a spoof on his real posts. Please.

    • Prince Rollmop says:

      Ducky, that is a seriously embarrassing Facebook post. One would think it’s a pisstake. If it’s not, then the Mayor wins the ‘2024 Fuckwit of the year award’. And that’s saying something when you have contenders like the Mullet, fatty Palmer, the 3 Labor stooges, Magpie Miles, Tony Blight, Kevin Gill and Claudia Bumne-smith. It is childish and amateurish post. Surely a young kid is cobbling that crap together??

      Speaking of Claudia Bumme-smith, Twonames meeting with TEL tomorrow- will the femme fatale’s under the watchful eye of Madam Bumme-smith ply the Mayor with orange cake, pikelets, and fresh orange juice in the lunch room while they tell him how good they are? Or will the Mayor march in there with his chainsaw and cut the deadwood loose? And there is a lot of deadwood. I think his cock is too soft to do that. Time will tell if this muppet is serious about reform and saving ratepayer dime. Tick tock….

      • The Magpie says:

        Colorful phrasing, there, Mopsy.

      • Grumpy says:

        Mopsy, there are a couple of people on his Facebook page trying to get him to tell us what TEL has actually done. His responses so far has been all froth and weasel words.

        • Ducks Nuts says:

          As we all know, past performance, is a predictor of future performance and so far all he has done is speak froth and weasel words. So don’t expect anything to change, except perhaps the 4 Vs: velocity, volume, variety and veracity.

    • Arse paste says:

      Troy Thompson is a complete knob. The crap that he is posting is some of the lamest shite I have ever seen. Just like his Defence service and CV, it’s all embellished and blown out of proportion. He truly is a bullshit artist of the first degree.

    • Jeff, Condon says:

      DN, agree they must be delusional, however, while they have a delusional audience who will take the trouble to log into it and then take the trouble to copy it and spread it to a wider audience, he will continue it.

      Isn’t there some kind of a record where they count the views? The bastard’s probably pissing himself with laughter at all the frothing and sputtering. Really, WGAF about his inane FB?

  28. Grumpy says:

    TwoNames post about the Volunteers do – 32 photos: 22 included him. Of course, there was one of a plate of food. Idiot.

    • Ducks Nuts says:

      Just spat my beer out, he’s got one with Sweary Pants Ryder.

    • Alahazbin says:

      Yes Grumps, The award recipients never got photo, just the accidental bastard handing them out. Better wise up the photographer in future.

  29. Maggie Moggie says:

    If you wish to know more about MIRRA you could give them a call they are in the local phone book.
    Also you could contact the Magnetic Museum there is a lot of information about MIRRA which dates back to the 1940’s.
    Alternatley you could attend the next MIRRA meeting and perhaps bring along your mate Maggie Deepthroat because both of your assumptions are completely that – assumptions and are incorrect on so many levels.

    • The Magpie says:

      And MIRRA’s activities, representations and meetings makes such a mockery of the TRRA, whose followers are little more than milliners for the tin foil hat brigade. The ‘Pie repeats his long standing complaint that the current TRRA should have the decency for find another name, because it is not a serious association representing the Townsville residents and ratepayers. The over-arching clown element strips the very occasional legitimate and reasonable issue of any credibility.

      Like other cities of like size, Townsville deserves another voice for the ratepayers because of the competing political and partisan influences on the duly elected council.

      • Southern Comfort says:

        Is the TRRA still alive? Last I checked on their FB page, the last post was from last year. For what looks like a year prior they had been running frequent posts directing people to cooker central My Place Townsville.

        So I thought everyone went somewhere newey, leaving Newey alone.

        Perhaps I’m mistaken. And haven’t (bothered to) looked far enough for a new TRRA home, as I lack enough Tin Foil for a hat.

        • The Magpie says:

          The ‘Pie must be honest, he darted in a few months ago he flatteringly got a mention, but couldn’t find the relevant piece, didn’t note any dates. If it has gone west, someone should grab the name.

        • Charon says:

          Poor old Pete Newey. Surely he isn’t all alone now? Have all of the flat earthers really left him? Townsville has plenty of tin foil to share around.

    • Jenny says:

      MM, about a month ago, following a link in the ‘Nest to the local online ‘newspaper’ over there, I found a letter to the editor from some local ‘chair’ of a MIRRA native title committee. I really don’t feel like seeing any more. That bloke should mind his own business.

  30. J jones says:

    Any lights on in the council offices at 5am? May be worth a check for our journo man Light-on?

  31. Grumpy says:

    Latest post by the Mad Jestet. 50 photographs, two of food, he managed to insert himself in all but two of the rest. He has got to go.

  32. The real ziptied helmet says:

    TwoNames just posted a vlog on his facebook page with a video adressing and showing his service number. He also called out how his information was leaked…

    FB post with video: https://fb.watch/sdxq6ECS49/

    Over the past few weeks there have been many rumors and accusations concerning my service in the Army.
    Today, I officially received my Service Dossier from Defence. It’s time our cities masthead and editorial team met their moral obligations and concentrated on delivering positive information about Townsville, instead of attempting to tear down its elected leader.
    Townsville has Billions of dollars of investment coming in, it is transitioning to new energy whilst maintaining its current supply channels.
    Local Government is not for political point scoring it’s about delivering for its community. The community made its choice to change, and I excepted that challenge to change what was and deliver a new vision. It’s time to face forward and make Townsville the pinnacle of the North.
    In the comments are the Marching-In Ceremony photos I have now found from storage. I chose not to identify friends, as they did not need to be bullied as I have been by media.
    It’s time to be conscious of mental health and the improper use of media.

    • Toy Thompstain says:

      Ha ha. So funny how ‘other sources’ got a hold of his service number before he did! Let that be a lesson Troy, people have ways and means of sifting through bullshit. I can only hope that somebody can now ‘leak’ information pertaining to your work history and education record.

  33. Grumpy says:

    Wow. Just wow. I have just then listened to the most evasive, sly bit of dissembling nonsense from TwoNames regarding his “just received” service number. With all the emotional nonsense regarding his father, he made zero attempt to explain his previous lies about his service. He complained bitterly that someone else had obtained the information, but refused to confirm or deny if it was true. He ends it with saying that he will not discuss the matter any further. Thompson- you are a fucking lying, grubby piece of shit. Go away.

    • The real ziptied helmet says:

      Yes, well he didn’t mention the SASR. Also, maybe now he can get his uni degrees and show us

    • The Magpie says:

      Grumps,anyone, have just googled five listings for Thompson’s mayoral page, and it seems The ‘Pie is blocked from them all.While that doesn’t surprise in the least, I don’t think a mayor’s public ratepayer funded page can block people …. presumably they can remove comments as they wish, but blocking the original material – where the mayor informs the public about ‘things’ – must remain in the public domain. Or is that not correct? Can someone post here the link they are using to access TwoNames official FB page.

    • Kenny Kennett says:

      I am still not convinced about his ‘medical episode’ as well. He continues to mention that the seizures are the result of many hits of his playing career. Is there a court case building? And as for his defence force number, he is not convincing. A very quick glimpse at a yellow piece of paper covering a bunch of other A4 sheets. No mention of what he did. Didn’t serve enough time to earn any medals but has a thick dossier?? What about the SAS?
      What about Uni qualifications? How was he able to work in Germany? And billions of dollars coming into Townsville? Cancer survivor? To quote your former employer, “please explain”!
      But he has demanded that there is to be no more questions about his past. So I guess that’s it we must obey his highness…not a fuckin’ chance you lying prick.

  34. Southern Comfort says:

    Kids, this is important, and may be on the exam later.

    For those of you who haven’t already come across the acronym AACC, or haven’t bothered to find out what it means, this is it:
    The Australian Army Catering Corps (AACC) is the corps within the Australian Army that is responsible for preparing and serving of meals. The motto of the corps is “We sustain”.

    • Alahazbin says:

      One comment on that blog from ‘Prince Planet’ is obviously a labor luvvie. Somebody let him know that the main reason Labor is on the nose is integrity.

  35. Villified says:

    Lachlan here for Holt Street Massacre
    Unlikely the bulletin will survive

    • Southern Comfort says:


      To what do you refer? TwoNames no answer video conversation with himself? That was a big nothing-Burger. He didn’t answer any of the questions that have been put to him about Military Service.

      And if you think it was just the Bully asking, you’re mistaken. TwoNames has made himself and Townsville prominent again, but for all the wrong reasons.

      The questions about his Service History, and the now even muddier answers that don’t match with his earlier claims, were coming from Coast to Coast. With Gary Adshead at 6PR one of the more distant questioners. Then there is the official referral to the OIA. The TwoNames Fan Club that jumped into action blaming the Bully and demanding apologies were as amusing to watch, as TwoNames was not.

      The Bully may not last forever. But I’m pretty sure it will outlast TwoNames.

  36. Fargo Argo says:

    Clinton Hawks with his belly and Guido moustache reminds me of that evil mafia cousin in that tv series that was on SBS called Fargo. The one who tries to take over but trips and falls whilst carrying a pistol that goes off ending in his misadventure.

    • Bob Roberts says:

      He should have kept himself in shape, it can’t have helped his position in a party of relatively fit reps.

    • Inspector Clouseau says:

      Sounds like me, Fartgo, when I’m in full flight after a crook! Often shoot myself in the foot, costing me a fortune in shoes!!! :)

  37. Afterthought says:

    Whilst Aaron , Scott , Les sit on their arses at least Phil Thompson is driving local / out of town investment for local contractors etc .

    • Not Prince Rollmop says:

      Yes indeed, the only Thompson in Townsville producing anything noteworthy. And once again, the 3 blind Labor mice sit idly on their thumbs while Phil Thompson does all the heavy lifting.

    • White Mouse says:

      So DHA have finally cottoned on that we have 500 personnel arriving over the next two years, and need to prioritize building in Townsville. Good luck finding land – developers are already selling out stages that won’t be coming on line until December.
      DHA have that riverside parcel of land in Aitkenvale, but they would need to knock down all the houses that are currently there and start again (which means kicking out about 30 families that currently rent). Unless there was a MCU lodged which would allow for construction of apartments or townhouses, it would only be 64 houses.

      • The Magpie says:

        You’d better believe it when The ‘Pie tells you when it comes to the military and Canberra/Brisbane, they will do whatever they like, and the council will need to be careful how they handle any request for flexibility in the rules. But hey, we’re in good hands, TwoNames Thompson is experienced in handling both military and flexibility matters.

        • Alahazbin says:

          Pie, Do you mean that they could grab that big block along Ross River Rd in the Cranbrook area. That would be ideal. Obviously the current owners don’t know what to do with it.

  38. Travis Norton says:

    Can anybody confirm whether Mayor Numbnuts is actually in his chair at 0500? According to his published diary he works very long hours, the complete opposite to the previous douchebag Mayor.

    • Achilles says:

      Problem there TM is that in these IT days, you can be “at work”, but not necessarily with your bum on the Mayoral throne.

  39. I’ll be plucked says:

    Twonames/twofaced on his video blog this morning : ‘I’ll talk to anyone about anything…..’.
    How about you talk to us/tell us WHY you lied about your 5 years military service/SAS and why you lied about having two educational degrees!

    • Blue Oyster Club says:

      Thompsons bleeding heart posts and discussions about his cancer and diabetes are just ways for him to soften the crowds and distract people from the fact that he is a shonk and is under the microscope when it comes to honesty. Sadly many people are gullible and swallow his shit.

    • wollo says:

      Watching two names,two dicks trying to defend himself yesterday on his video reminds me of what you might see on A Current Affair interview with a con man who was accused of spray painting an old pensioners roof and blaming the paint when it washed off after the first rain.

    • Ducks Nuts says:

      Except that….
      Maybe someone should ask about Illich Park and why his ex wife was on the board of Community ASA?

      • The Magpie says:

        The ‘Pie is told he was active in getting her appointed without revealing his connection to her at all.

    • Ducks Nuts says:

      Also, while he’s busy talking, maybe someone should ask why he gets no public support from his biological family, except his mother who he lives with.

      I know we dont like to bring families into this Magpie but we have to continually see his stupid fucking moronic squeeze in official mayorall photos. So where the hell are those kids, he says he has and has his name tied up in trusts with?

      • The Magpie says:

        Well, a reasonable question, more an observation really – like why isn’t Melania Trump attending hubby’s trial, same principle – but that’s as far as it goes.

        There is no specific prohibition about mentioning family in the Nest, but it has to be relevant and an issue of public interest. That policy is why there were very few comments of the many received regarding Jenny’s kids, and only then because it appeared one of them was posting on matters in the blog.

        • Ducks Nuts says:

          If you were Melania Trump, you too would be staying as far away from the very public slow moving train crash that is the the orange idiots trial.

          And one assumes the Birnbrauer/Thompson family, having experienced the bullshit of Thompstain their entire lives would be keeping a good distance from what will undoubtedly be yet another embarrassment.

  40. Kenny Kennett says:

    I’m still slightly sceptical about the seizure in the supermarket. The video he shows is obviously a security video from the shopping centre. How did he get it? Who gave it to him? Why did he put it online for all to see? Did he get permission from the onlookers to publicise their attendance? Handy for it to happen right in front of the camera.
    With all the bullshit he’s telling us, it makes us more sceptical on anything he does. I hope he’s taking medicine for this.

  41. Burnt Brows says:

    There we have it. Birnbrauer has proved all the doubters wrong about his military service. Holding an unreadable folder he calls a dossier and posting a blurry picture which almost looks my father marching prior to Vietnam, the overwhelming evidence is nearly inconclusive. Onwards and upwards I guess.

  42. Trollseeker says:

    The cheek of this Mayor stating that he has answered the questions and therefore refuses to discuss it further. We are all meant to now look to the future and put the fact that he lied to get the job behind us. I can’t get over the gullibility of his followers and the fact that he has admitted to lying by stating his involvement in the military while also not admitting to lying. The mind truly boggles and I hope the investigating parties keep on investigating, I get the feeling that there are bigger lies underneath it all.

  43. Ducks Nuts says:

    Even 7 News has picked it up

    “Townsville Mayor Troy Thompson has failed to put an end to speculation about his defence history.

    Questions have been raised about his service record and why it doesn’t line up with claims he made to Townsville voters.

    7NEWS at 6pm. ”


    • Jeff, Condon says:

      DN, are you really so surprised that a politician has lied? Shock, horror, dismay.

      Maybe you could grasp the nettle and make a complaint to the Local Govt minister, yourself. If you do it quickly, you may get a chance to vote your beloved Mullet back in.

      • The Magpie says:

        Trivialising this is the frightened refuge of those apparently limited intellectual scope, it will allow the serious possible outcomes to be soberly considered. Politicians usually wait to be elected before they start lying about facts … when they are campaigning, they cannot lie in terms of promises, on the dodgy basis that they meant what they said AT THE TIME. Few are stupid, arrogant or mentally unbalanced enough enough lie about facts that can be easily exposed.

        Thompson lied about facts, but it is entirely up to him if he knowingly lied about seeking transparency, which he demonstrably does not. But having been found out, he has reverted to a childish ‘didn’t, didn’t, didn’t’biting of the bottom lip.

        If it weren’t for the salary, he would’ve slunk off long ago, leaving his bimbo squeeze and her magic watches behind, given his now known MO.

        • Jenny says:

          “If it weren’t for the salary, he would’ve slunk off long ago.” Magpie, if it weren’t for the voters he would not be mayor in the first place. Looking at the Channel 7 and Townsville Bulletin coverage yesterday, it looks like a last gasp from the local mainstream media. He’s told them he has nothing more to say and they’ll probably suck it up unless someone can uncover something particularly unsavoury. And don’t expect the ‘local government integrity inquiry’ to go anywhere. They will be debating amongst themselves whether what Thompson did as a candidate before he got into the job is even part of their mandate – which it probably is but then look what they did with Paul Jacob back in the day. They slapped his wrist with a slip of parking ticket paper and asked him to say sorry to the other councillors.

          • The Magpie says:

            What twee twattery.

            Sad to see, Jenny, but you’ve gone from plain silly to deeply deluded. Give it a rest, Jenny, our intelligence is insulted enough by Thompson.

          • I’ll be plucked says:

            Either Elusive Butterflog has left, or passed on, OR Jenny is the new moniker! More spins and twists than a sheet in the dryer at Ma Kelly’s laundromat.

        • Jeff, Condon says:

          No one is trivialising Twonames assertions regarding his ADF service. I can’t believe that hasn’t deliberately lied about it. He’s stated that he he served on bases where he hasn’t and was only a reserve member fo a bit over two years, duration and only attended for about six months of that time. I’m not surprised he couldn’t remember his service number- he hardly used.

          On the balance of this, he is clearly untrustworthy and should be required to show cause why he shouldn’t be dismissed.

          Regarding tertiary qualifications, di he claim to have BAs, or is this just an assumption? I doubt he had the time to get two. Maybe diplomas or CRT 4s.

          If he has claimed higher qualifications, as a result of the service history checks, he must be required to produce them.

      • Ducks Nuts says:

        Jeff, now you’re just showing how simple minded you are.

        I worked at council under Mooney, Tyrrell and Hill. I have no particular love for any of them. A lack of integrity, hubris are a fast way to earn contempt and ridicule.

        Thompson has managed to demonstrate these qualities far faster than Jenny and in
        a much more public manner. He has already secured national recognition as a lying POS.

        And for all Jenny’s stupid ideas, micromanagement and colossal fuckups, she was never stupid enough to subject the community to multiple awkward selfies with photos of her meals and sickly sweet photos of her husband. She also knew better than to put up fantastical daily diary’s. And NEVER, NOT EVER, did we get a vlog where we got to look up her nose holes while she talked at is in a patronising tone.

        Thompson deserves everything thing that comes to him. And it will.

        • Jeff, Condon says:

          DN, in addition, the Mullet didn’t have to run an inane FB site, she had the Astonisher to do that for her.

          And if the FB site distresses you so much, don’t look at it. It’s just irrelevant crap.

          • The Magpie says:

            How does one know it’s irrelevant crap if one doesn’t look at, Clothhead?

    • Toy Thompstain says:

      Has the hole just got dug deeper? Thompson says 5 years of service, yet documents say 2.5 years service. Thats a shortfall of double. Will the media just leave the issue alone, or will they keep pursuing it? Very interesting. And as has been mentioned, his so-called work and educational background is also checkered. Are we witnessing the great undoing of a questionable individual?

  44. Villified says:

    Southern comfort
    Your right the Bulle will outlast accidental..
    I was referring to Lachlan and the Redhead coming to Holt Street.. He don’t come here for a glorious winter.
    I’m just inferring .. the regionals are about to be morphed….
    It’s just a vibe … a shake up..is happening..

    • The Magpie says:

      A colorful, some rustic way of putting it, but very valid point. And the pestilential presence of Brooks on our shores will hopefully be brief.it says as much about the Murdoch ethos that she is still employed with company after she was complicit in costing them the highly profitable New of the World.

      If she’s here permanently in some key role, it is not a good sign for this country.

  45. Burnt Brows says:

    Sounds like this issue will make the Media all anround Australia in a big way. The crazy bit about all this Birnbrauer crap is that his military service and uni qualifications didn’t need to be a part of his campaign to run for Mayor. Without either of them it would have been fine but he chose to (what looks like) fabricate and stretch the truth which has become an integrity issue. I can only speculate that he is a ‘serial fabricator’ who struggles to understand the concept of reality. As I have said before, if you publish on sites like LinkedIn and ‘suggest’ you have certain qualifications which were in fact just enrolments and completing minimal modules before flopping out, then that is an untruth. If it is proved true that he only did 2.5 years ADF and not 5 years then that is another major untruth. How do Townsville residents end up in this situation?

    • The Magpie says:

      The answer to your last question is easy … because Fran O’Callaghan became too ill to continue with her campaign. Otherwise, she’d be our mayor now.

  46. Bullshit says:

    This is a good overview of the issues around making North Queensland its own state


    • The Magpie says:

      Watch it if you want to waste your time, never going to happen. The ‘Pie wll give it a miss, thanks.

    • Burnt Brows says:

      North QLD a seperate State? Been there, tried that, and I wouldn’t waste anymore of my time even contemplating it. Yes I know the Constitution could allow it, but apart from approvals for mining royalties, power generation bla bla bla…….., where would a majority Qld vote come from considering nearly everyone population wise lives south of Noosa.

      • The Magpie says:

        Scary idea, given the number of elected numbskulls this part of the world has thrown up. Aaron Harper for Premier? Jenny Hill as Treasurer, Messagebank Walker Sports and Recreation Minister, Troy Thompson in charge of Truth Telling?

  47. Trollseeker says:

    Looking forward to tomorrow’s edition of the magpies nest. The weekly expose on that crook Mayor Thompson is riveting reading. Each week that goes by sees Troy being the dodgy character that we are now used to. Keep up the good work magpie.

  48. Where’s Prins says:

    Where is the lazy ex part-time CEO Ralston? Is he still local, has he put the house on the market? Cant imagine him staying in Townsville.

    • The Magpie says:

      His house in Castle Hill/Yarrawonga is on the market. He approached a major agent a few weeks ago. And is expecting a handsome profit, to which he is entitled to, before he goes back to the missus in Brissy and their recently purchased squillion dollar pad in an el swisho suburb.

      • Where’s Prins says:

        That makes sense. He won’t be missed. Picked up a nice bit of ratepayer coin for his holiday in Townsville for a couple of years though. Well, that’s when he was actually here. No loss. Bye bye Prins, don’t come back.

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