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The Magpie

Sunday, May 9th, 2021   |   163 comments

Gone To The Doggings … The Townsville Bulletin’s Grubby Trip Down Memory Lane Should Be Called Out

There must surely come a time when the uncontrolled excesses of the Townsville Bulletin should be challenged by community leaders. This week, the Townsville Bulletin reached a new low in listing –  and ergo promoting – sites where illegal ‘dogging’  takes place… that is, watching or taking part in sex acts in public places. Why won’t our community leaders confront the editor this and the wider issue of related content that reflects so badly on the city?

Houses under the hammer… some great news for TCC CEO Prins Ralston – his council has just publicly listed 42 homes it is about to put to auction to recover unpaid rates … but the Bulletin, which serves a staple diet of hard luck tear-jerker stories, is apparently still lurking in the bushes and doesn’t think such an auction rates a story. The Magpie begs to differ, and tells why.

The Magpie and Nest readers come up with a great Olympic event for Townsville … with the unique flavour of the city about it.

We present our regular gallery from the USA documents Joe Biden work to clear the tracks after the train wreck presidency of the past 4 years.

And an amazing video from the trusted fact checking people at Snopes … it’s not the age of hoverboards yet, but sure looks like it … a fascinating look at drones taking human passengers.

But first ….

 A reminder that your support is sorely needed to help keep The Nest going. The ‘Pie expects nothing for the time – about 50 hours – he chooses to put into this weekly effort, but he is, as Roger Miller so famously said ‘a man of means by no means’, and Telstra, Optus, NBN and various registrations and operating requirements keep demanding their due. If you think this alternative voice for the city is worth while, and worth a smile, your support will help make the task easier. The Donate button is included at the end of the blog. Thanks.

 Now onward ….

‘I Shot An ICBM In The Air, It Fell to Earth I Know Not Where’

(with apologies to Henry Wadsworth Longchappy)

As if it wasn’t enough that China has thrown fried rice futures into disarray on the stock market, it seems they’ve now decided on some intercontinental ballistic bingo. We (’we’ being the rest of the planet) have been airily informed by Beijing that the Long March 5B rocket which successfully delivered some spare parts and some Chinese take-away (‘the chicken kung pow was just heavenly, comrade!’) to its space station is now heading back our way in an uncontrolled orbit. And it is due to plonk down – somewhere – this weekend, making either the splash or the dent only a 21-tonne object can make when travelling at 7 kilometres per second. Despite the fact that a similar rogue Long March 5B rocket narrowly missed the United States last year, (hmmm, a direct hit on the Oval Office back then would have saved us all a lot of heartache) China’s big Peking Duck, Xi Jinping, isn’t worried. He figures he owns so much of the planet, international unpleasantness is unlikely. But as Bentley is quick to point out, the spent rocket could send a message Down Under.

Rocket man fin SMALL

Meanwhile, back on earth, more earthly matters have our attention.

Seriously, Someone Needs To Have A Word With Astonisher Iditor Craig Warhurst – Either In His Office Or Out In The Back Lane

That chat urgently needs to take place, and if his minders in Brisbane or Sydney deign not to tug back on his leash, then the leaders of bthis community need to confront him in the strongest possible manner after this week’s new low. In newspapers and their associated online sites, there is a fine line between occasional sauciness, and entrenched sordidness. It is now indisputable that the Townsville Bulletin has now deliberately crossed over into the latter.

First the unfolding story as reported here during the week, and then what should be done about it.

The Magpie 

May 7, 2021 at 11:17 am  (Edit)

There is a strange linkage with this despicable low for the Bulletin (didn’t think it possible, did you?) – a paper which again clearly shows zero respect for itself or its readers.

First, this mysteriously popped up the TB FB page last night without explanation or given reason.

Dogging image

Then things became even grubbier, weirder and unfathomably crass when you clicked the link in the post and got this …

Dogging archive Screen Shot 2021-05-06 at 11.15.33 pm

Note the date … 2017 FFS! The since-departed and now – dammit-  returned journalist, Chris McMahon infested the paper with a lot of this sort of bottom-feeding pimply year 8 drivel back then, but why bring it up now? What tenuous, slim thread of relativity did this even make an attempt to justify this stuff?

Well, the moist, calloused hand of Mr McMahon (reputedly now deputy iditor) seemed to have slipped behind the waist band of paper’s Facebook onanist and gave him the good oil that this story was about to be published on line.

Screen Shot 2021-05-07 at 10.47.04 am

So the paper’s FB Tugger O’Toole, despite his exhaustion, managed an archival search to dig up McMahon’s 2017 dross. Which is an hilarious indictment of the Townsville Bulletin’s priorities, a paper which couldn’t even check its feel-good story about the dodgy Angie Akee to her past multiple misdeeds chronicled a decade ago – in a story that won the paper its only ever Walkley Award.

But there’s more … when the ‘bonking in the bushes’ story eventually was published (not in the printed edition) the paper decided to dive down the lower depths of social media pond with a totally irrelevant video (not linked here).

Doggy style video Screen Shot 2021-05-07 at 9.09.37 am

This little misadventure at least vindicates The Magpie’s long expressed belief that Rupert Murdoch’s procession of imported blow-through iditors of the Townsville Bulletin have been openly and blatantly ‘dogging’ Townsville for years.

We all have the doubtful privilege of watching ourselves being publicly rogered every day, but now we can put a word to it – we’ve been constantly subject to  BULLdogging.

So What Could Be Done About It

That depends on what business leaders, our council and community and religious groups decide what they are willing to accept in terms of the city’s profile, and therefore its prospects of economic success. Sadly, The Townsville Bulletin is in the position to set the tone for outsiders views of this city,  so jibes about the paper end up being jibes about the city itself. And of course, there will be a lot of dishonest parroted stuff about freedom of speech and the press.

That’s because so far we have had a docile mob, hiding behind a shoulder shrug, a wry grin and a muttered ‘Well, what can you do, eh?’ There’s been no indication of any guts to confront this damaging publication run by amateurs with minds locked in at the lower end of social media. Like this …

Screen Shot 2021-05-08 at 5.49.43 pm

A united approach by a delegation of civic and social leaders, including strong lobby groups like churches, the council and the Chamber of Commerce, should by-pass any discussions with the local oafs …

craig warhurst 5 MvpFUWNw

… and go directly to Brisbane or Sydney executives. But this would only be effective if it could be demonstrated that elements of the delegation could inflict financial damage, which is the only thing News Corpse cares about.  Which is a tough call in a one-paper town, but information channels are changing rapidly, and the paper has already lost a significant amount of business to other areas.  The Bulletin long ago gave up any pretence of caring about community sentiment or standards, running an inappropriate, one-size-fits-all lowest common denominator agenda which is required by order across all News mastheads.

This episode will entrench Townsville into the ‘Quaint Outback Aussies’ basket, like the NT News in Darwin, another place with serious image problems caused by its main newspaper.

The History Of The Word

Dogging’ is a particularly Pommy coinage, fairly new, which The ‘Pie came across a year or so ago while scanning of the British newspapers. While the origin of the word is obvious, the predominant part of the activity is the watching, with the knowledge and tacit permission of the bonkees … otherwise it’s just couple of people fucking.

We may all eagerly await the Bulletin’s ‘Ten Best Doggings of 2021′, with appropriate commentary on style, length of time, possibly also length of length and best staged whimper. This will likely be followed up with ‘Townsville’s 10 Best School Play Grounds Next To Bushland.’

The ‘Pie hopes all that he has just said is a joke, but with this despicable publication, don’t bet on it.

Getting Hammered: The Council About To Knock Down More Than 40 Homes Whose Rates Have Not Been Paid …

… knocked down to the highest bidder, that is.

Auctions Screen Shot 2021-05-08 at 9.32.54 am

The ‘Pie could be wrong but this is the first time he has actually learnt of such a large swathe of dwelling being sold off to recover unpaid rates. The threat has often been trotted out in Bulletin stories, but is this the first bulk move of this nature? Whether it is or it isn’t, maybe this give a pointer to the questionable state of the council finances generally. It’s a fair question because this sort of activity – legal and fair on the face of it – isn’t the best look in a disaster-ravaged city just coming out of its Brisbane-induced COVID coma.

And The ‘Pie is curious why this list, published way back on page 63 in the classifieds of this weekend’s Astonisher, didn’t merit even the tiniest of mentions in the news columns. Maybe The ‘Pie has lost his touch (no second opinions are invited, thank you) but this is a story anywhere any day of the week. And forced auctions like this are usually great grist for the bullshit mill of the Bulletin, which regularly feeds us on ‘oh, cruel fate’ beat-up stories about folks down on their luck. (‘It All Went Wrong For Glenda When She Broke Her Toe – Now she’s losing her toenail AND her home’.)

The auction notice was required by law to be displayed in the paper, but the editorial silence could be because the paper’s honorary deputy editor, Mayor Mullet, doesn’t want to draw too much pre-budget attention to council finances. Now one wonders why that might be. Perhaps things haven’t improved … maybe even tanked further … since The ‘Pie published this disheartening set of figures a few months ago.

TCC sustainability IMG_8735

The next Financial Stability set of figures will be … umm … interesting, to say the least.

Our Mayor Doesn’t Like Opposing Political Interest From Outside Her Fiefdom, So She’ll Hate This

But instead of hating it, how about doing something about it,  you political goof-off.

Molly 9
7 approved
email hidden; JavaScript is required

Hi Magpie, thought you could be interested in the above  post today from Larissa Waters, Greens Senator Qld. Larissa met with Wulguru residents last Thursday (6/5/21) evening to heat their problems re getting the 30 year old problem of overflowing sewerage during and after heavy rain in the Wulguru area. The issue is ongoing and the TCC doesn’t want to know about it. Getting any answer to the problem and related issues has been hopeless.

Quick Laugh While We’re In The Council Courtyard

From time to time, we have all heard mystifying waffle about Townsville being a SMART city, something the old bird has never been able to reconcile with the piecemeal shambles we have under Jenny Hill’s stewardship. But apparently it isn’t just some totally unmerited boast but is actually an acronym straight out of the LGAQ ‘baffle ‘em with bullshit’ handbook. Answer these five questions.

SMART acronym Screen Shot 2021-04-11 at 12.05.01 am

Answers one to five: you ARE kidding, aren’t you?

Skateboarding Into Olympic History

With Nanna Anna’s promise that the regions will not be left out of her Grand Olympic Design (GOD), a Nest reader made a suggestion that fired up reader’s imaginations to make an interesting adjustment to the latest sport to be ratified by the Olympics.

Townsville strand Screen Shot 2020-05-06 at 11.06.43 am

Young fella 

May 4, 2021 at 8:48 am  (Edit)

What about the skateboarding here in Townsville. Be great to get some Olympic standard facilities to use into the future.


  • Old Tradesman

May 4, 2021 at 9:19 am  (Edit)

Just go to the strand and skateboard between the walkers and scooter riders on the narrow path.


  • The Magpie

May 4, 2021 at 9:35 am  (Edit)

Hey, there’s an idea (already well in practice) that could be refined into yet another ICONIC Townsville pastime … an annual Strand Skateboard Slalom … close it off for just the one day event, and have a group of specially chosen walkers …. old lady on zimmer frame, teenager with unruly dog, family spread haphazardly across pathway, a pair of entwined young lovers (vertical, not horizontal), some power walkers, a few old codgers shuffling along, and a dozen or texters. And Mayor Mullet out on a campaigning stroll.

Contestants are against the clock, and the course runs from the Tobruk pool to the Rockpool, all tracked in tourism-promoting exciting drone shots from above. Points are lost for any direct collisions, less for walkers forced to jump aside or stumble over backwards and contestants who fail to avoid deliberately outstretched legs, elbow nudges or stiff arms will lose all points for that run (there will be three).

And there’s a bonus double points in the unlikely event someone can knock over the mayor … many have tried but no one has succeeded, she can dodge anything.


  • Zimmer dude

 May 4, 2021 at 10:24 am  (Edit)

And you could include an obstacle course where you skate around fresh dog shit on the footpath, uneven pavements and potholes, empty goon casks, and discarded spray cans? And perhaps add the challenge of a wet path caused by vandalised sprinklers along the Strand.

  • Dave of Kelso

 May 4, 2021 at 12:55 pm  (Edit)

Can we have the starting line at the top of Castle Hill? That way the ambulance and stretcher bearers can get involved.


  • The Magpie

 May 4, 2021 at 1:40 pm  (Edit)

Silly you, Dave … can’t start there, you can’t skateboard on grass … even the million dollar kind.

A Mixed Bag Of Other Matters In Passing During The Week

TCC sunset Screen Shot 2021-04-30 at 11.13.58 am


The Prime Minister uses his connections to silence critics. A Magpie exclusive.

St Brittainy eyxkzv


Revealed: Why Malcolm Turnbull really hates Kevin Rudd.

Kev fart fz0oid


From American Vogue.

Dwarf goats Screen Shot 2021-04-22 at 11.51.09 am

HA! New York, you’re way behind the times, we’ve been electing them to council and parliament for years.


And why just this one bloke?

Screen Shot 2021-05-07 at 11.54.54 am

Townsville’s been full of dangerous clots for years.

The Star-Spangled Circus Continues

The chief Bozo might have left the ring, but his understudies are still there looking for an audience.

We start this week’s gallery with a pithy Tweet of the Week.

Class warfare Screen Shot 2021-04-30 at 5.21.26 pm 20210502edbbc-a 251205_rgb_768 20210501edhan-a cjones05042021 20210430edptc-a wu210428 sk042921dapr wu210430 251233_rgb_768 251287_rgb_768 Screen Shot 2021-05-04 at 8.58.36 am Screen Shot 2021-04-30 at 9.54.35 am 20210503edbbc-a 20210505edphc-a 20210505edhan-a Screen Shot 2021-04-30 at 10.27.21 am lk050921dapr 251385_rgb_768

EBay Has Something For Everyone … Or Not

During the ‘Pie was burrowing around in one of those rabbit holes that happen when you click on something interesting that also has something interesting to click on ad infinitum, when he pressed a wrong button on Ebay. The following is not manufactured, photoshopped or a joke … it actually jumped up on the screen unbidden and unexplained.

Mike Reynolds ebay Screen Shot 2020-12-08 at 10.48.37 am

The ‘Pie did not inquire further, shaken by the thought that there could be MORE than ONE of them.

And Finally, Rising Above It All.

The ‘Pie has always admired the Snopes fact checking mob, who are consistent and reliable in trying to stem the tide of fake claims on social media. But they also check other seemingly fanciful claims, sometimes with surprising results.

Hover boards are now a reality … just powered differently to Hollywood. Almost like magic.


That’s it for another week. Hop into comments, as you have read, they can be fun or infuriating, have your say, posts accepted 24/7.

And if you’re minded to support this blog, the Donate button is below.

The Magpie's Nest is now more than five years old, and remains an independent alternative voice for Townsville. The weekly warble is a labour of love and takes a lot of time to put together. So if you like your weekly load of old cobblers, you can help keep it aloft with a donation, or even a regular voluntary subscription. Paypal is at the ready, it's as easy as ... well, easy as pie. Limited advertising space is also available.


  1. Mike Douglas says:

    Aaron Harper whose electorate has some of the highest crime rates in the Ville as well as nearly 40% of the houses being auctioned by T.C.C. donates some of his time assisting paramedics and should know the issues in the City with domestic violence , burnout Hospital frontline staff , crime is spending his time with a petition to try and assist Council to secure $25 mil for the pipeline replacement costs under Riverway drive from Phillip Thompson . Aarons own State Government blew out an additional $50 mil on the Stadium due to a deal with the Unions and public works Minister Mick De Brenni has just inked a deal with the CMFEU on projects over $100 mil will require Labors new ” best practice instruction manual ” . The new deal is estimated to increase wages on State Government sites by 30% so think of all the hundreds of $ millions of dollars in Cross River Rail , Olympic infrastructure blowing out State debt further and stripping $ from the regions , effecting services resulting in begging bowl to the Feds .

    • NQ Gal says:

      On that basis, the much lauded Stage 2 pipeline is now either going to cost $253m or they just don’t do 30% of it.

  2. Molly 9 says:

    Thanks for another great week of commentary and for including my link to Larissa Waters.
    Saw the low life headline in the Bully re ‘dogging’, thought we’d left that sort of crap back in the pre-2000’s type nonsense from the Bulletin.
    But the reason I’m commenting, followed the Snopes link to the hoverboard story and below it is a much more powerful story re: the origin of Mother’s Day. Very relevant today being Mother’s Day’. Must read.

  3. Prince Rollmop says:

    Molly 9 made an interesting comment on The Magpie yesterday regarding Greens Senator Larissa Waters meeting with the Mulguru Poonami Army. Fran O’Callaghan has also thrown support behind demanding a new pump station. The issue is at least 10 years old, probably longer. My concern is that if Council are not capable of remediating this problem during the good financial times (during the mining boom), how can they fix things now, with a half billion dollar Council debt, while the Mayor Mullet is still Mayor and king of the toe cutters TCC CEO Prince Ralston is in charge of the budget??

    Perhaps Mayor Mullet and the Prince would like to both purchase a house in the affected suburb(s) and live in the poonami riddled streets so that they can experience this health risk first hand? It’s time this city voted in people who had the interests of the locals at heart and held them to account when they fail the people when they break their promises or fail to fix other issues as they arise.

    • The Magpie says:

      You ask how can they fix things now, with a half billion dollar Council debt?
      Same way they built a $300M stadium, and guaranteed on going costs of up to $10million. Also the same way they give the gormless mob at TEL $750K annually. (Be interesting if in this year’s budget the Dudley Do Nothings get a haircut.)

    • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

      Council ARE capable of fixing the poonami, the stinking potable water in some suburbs and more isolated incidents (like the smelly water water pump station in Annandale) but there isn’t the executive will or the bureaucratic processes to achieve that.

      As long as the organisation is managed by knee jerk reaction and knee-high jerks, rather than solid planning we will continue to see this crap.

      Take a drive along Ross River Road towards Stockland and look at what should have been a simple kerb and channel job but has taken months, put a worker in hospital through hitting a known underground power line, and is only now getting up a head of steam. It has been a complete cluster. The only people doing well are the traffic controllers. I feel gutted for the small businesses and local residents having to put up with this incompetence.

      • The Magpie says:

        Comment of the Day, and probably the week.

        And a great line worth repeating: As long as the organisation is managed by knee jerk reaction and knee-high jerks, rather than solid planning we will continue to see this crap.

  4. The Magpie says:

    Well, it take long for this week’s media bloopers to start dropping into the in box.

    This story contained this rather interesting Freudian slip.

    “When Qantas boss Alan Jones campaigned for marriage equality, he did not do it at the expense of his corporate interests. Quite the contrary, he was explicit that his politics was justified by a ‘business case’ that would yield commercial benefits for Qantas.”

    Not sure what Mr Joyce thinks of being confused with Australia’s leading closet queen.

  5. fwyp says:

    Hi ‘Pie,

    I wonder if someone knows why a person living about 850km South is given a regular presence in the Letters in the Editor?

    I had noticed occasionally in the past, but this week, Eloise Rowe, from Tannum Sands had longish letters in 3 of the past 4 papers.

    In Thursday’s issue, for instance, she had about 24 column-centimetres of really “local” issues concerning Western Sydney.

    As an aside, if you then keep the relevant page for reference, it is hard to know when a letter was published, as the Bully doesn’t print the page, date, etc on these editorial pages.

    • The Magpie says:

      Interesting point. Worth keeping an eye on whatever barrow she is pushing.

    • Tropical says:

      The likes of Rowe, Fontes, Brown, Tubman, White and Steve BG all get a run because they are eco loon climate fragiles. The idioter gives no one a else a run because he thinks that these clowns are smarter than the rest of us.
      There are others but Names escape me for now.

      • Steve, Belgian Gardens says:

        Undoubtedly all smarter than you, but if there were any letters from mouth breathing imbeciles they’d get first preference.

        • The Magpie says:

          Your deep and incisive analysis never ceases to astound.

        • Tropical says:

          Actually SBG I am an academic at JCU.
          The only mouth breathers that I am aware of are people like you. So shove your mouth breathing insults up your arse. That is all you have moron.
          I can double up on insults if you like but you are to thick to understand what I am saying
          Be of no doubt my grand kids are way smarter than oxygen thieves like you.

          • The Magpie says:


          • Little Rupert says:

            Though to be fair, many University ‘academics’ never actually finish their studies.

          • The Magpie says:

            The ‘Pie is with you there … and with academics who keep learning because they realise there is a point when they understand they don’t know everything. And never will. You learn something new everyday bin this life … especially if you have to curate comments on this blog.

            The Magpie also recommends the book ‘Cynical Theories’ by Helen Pluckrose and James Lindsay (Swift Press), which exposes what a certain disruptive stratum of academia are up to, to fuck up society.

    • J jones says:

      It’s pretty simple really. They don’t get enough local letters anymore…..another sign of much reduced circulation….so they have to use these imported ones which in the past would simply have been put in the bin.

  6. Alahazbin says:

    That LGAQ 5 point plan for a Corporate Plan. Looks like they had a seminar with all their members and come up with this with some consultant using felt pens and butchers paper. Patted themselves on the back and then shared beer & pizza with Hallam.
    Not necessarily in that order though.

  7. Little Rupert says:

    I know if you don’t pay your rates your house can be sold up, but what a dreadful situation to be in for those people. I have a client who was in this situation recently and we just sorted out their arrears 2 months ago. Just in time. Decent family where both the mum and dad lost their jobs, dad got a job but less money so went from two incomes to 2/3’s of an income. I know, let’s take their house and make it even worse for them !

  8. Ducks Nuts says:

    Magpie SMART is not an LGAQ thing. SMART is a well recognised acronym used to guide the development of robust performance measures that can be reported against. If only TCC would follow this guide instead of writing useless, unmeasurable waffle and trying to pass it off as performance measures.


    • The Magpie says:

      Doesn’t change the fact the info quoted in the blog is vague enough to be moulded into whatever buzz word bullshit local government wants … and is a blueprint for the LGAQ’s various agendas of self-interest.

      • Ducks Nuts says:

        Yes it has been reworded. But you can find many versions of this. None are exactly the same. The SMART guidelines were provided by LGAQ to help Council’s with Corporate Planning.

        This of course has absolutely nothing to do with Smart Cities. Which is a total crock of shit.

        There are bigger issues with TCCs Corporate plan than vague performancemeasures. The plan fails to meet regulatory requirements. Which, the LGAQ rightly tells councils they must meet.

    • Critical says:

      Another reference to SMART as used as a project management tool. Very much doubt TCC uses SMART in project development and execution.

      I’m assured by friends who work in TCC that no tools even remotely resembling SMART principles are used in Walker Street.


      • The Magpie says:

        That’s strange … there certainly seem to be plenty of tools down there. None of them are smart?

      • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

        We have moved beyond SMART to SMARTarse where the basic tools are used to create something completely impenetrable and meaningless which is then charted and put onto a laminated sheet for all to worship.

  9. Unpublished says:

    I suspect that the Bulletin editor publishes letters from eco maniacs outside town because, after throwing all the letters he receives critising Jenny Hill and the Cowboys in the bin, he doesn’t have a whole lot left to put in his paper. I wonder how much it costs to get that sort of favourable treatment.

    • The Magpie says:

      Not sure that’s as true as it used to be. With the undeniable rise in popularity , combined with his nwillingness to take on local issues that normally would not be in the Federal sphere, Phillip Thompson is being treated with kid gloves by the paper. There have been a few Mullet-scorchers in recent months, just enough for the iditor to claim ‘balance’ … but he’s about as balanced as Jenny Hill’s budget.

      • I’ll be plucked says:

        Good one Pie, you are a very punny person (I would say punny bloke, but can’t anymore. Gotta go gender neutral, as opposed to neutered)! :)

        • Dave of Kelso says:

          Go on, say bloke.

          As an Army Apprentice there was a nipple pink book doing the rounds, ‘Songs that Miss Lilly Should Never Have Tought Us’.

          I only remember the chorus of one song,

          Jock, Jock, the swagy Scott,
          Was a marvelous sight to see.
          You could see he was built,
          By the tilt of his kilt,
          And his sporran hung down to his knees.

          A pox on PC and all that it has spawned. And good evening to all you blokes and sheilas.

          • The Magpie says:

            Seems like you’re into the Ol’ White Infuriator at an early hour, Dave.

          • The Magpie says:

            She certainly was unable to teach you to spell correctly.

          • Dave of Kelso says:

            I have many weak points, spelling is one of them, not helped by preemptive text.

          • Bentley says:

            Ah yes, I remember it well. In the days when having fun was not illegal I once spent some weeks in hospital after a bad car accident. A lovely lady to whom I shall be forever grateful brought me a beautiful bunch of flowers and a copy of Snatches and Lays ‘Songs that Miss Lilly Should Never Have Taught Us’. from which the ward benefitted culturally. The nursing staff, as I recall, gave up trying to ban the ward’s recital of some of Robbie Burns poems and songs. That book, I believe is the one to which you refer.

          • The Magpie says:

            ‘In the days when having fun was not illegal ….’ … ah, yes, and back then you could say you were having a gay old time while keeping your pants on.

          • Bentley says:

            Dave, you may have gathered from the previous post that I concur with your sentiments re PC. Respect is one thing, PC is another and often BS.

  10. fwyp says:

    Hi again,

    My apologies. A very brief look in Google came up with four references to our featured letter writer.

    I don’t have access to these papers, but as well as the TB, Eloise features in the Sunshine Coast, QT (Ipswich), Gladstone (her local rag), and CQ (Rocky) News. Must be a busy writer?

    But the Gladstone entry is noted as a “news story”, so a journalist as well? And the mentioned Harry Bruce is a cartoonist.

    http://www.sunshinecoastdaily.com.au › news › letters-to…
    25 Sept 2020 — Eloise Rowe, Tannum Sands. HARRY’S VIEW ON BROWNE PARK FUNDING. Harry’s view on Browne Park stadium funding announcement.

    http://www.qt.com.au › search › tag=eloise+rowe
    eloise rowe harry bruce cartoon letters to the editor morning bulletin sms to the editor. 25th Sept. 2020 12:09 AM. Harry’s view on Browne Park stadium funding …

    http://www.couriermail.com.au › gladstone › news-story
    14 Mar 2021 — Those coming here for a new beginning must play by the rules, or “there’s the door”: “Con-Air” is boarding. Eloise Rowe. Tannum Sands.

    http://www.cqnews.com.au › news › letters-to-the-editor-…
    28 Oct 2020 — This can’t be ignored forever. Make your vote count this State Election. Eloise Rowe, Tannum Sands. HARRY’S VIEW ON STORMY WEATHER.

    • Rowe Rowe Rowe your boat.... says:

      Eloise Rowe posts comments on just about every fucking newspaper in Australia!! Seems to be an opinionated fool who has nothing better to do with her life than comment on everything as if she is some fucking expert. A bit like Kelso, NMD and Stupid from Belgian Gardens.

      • The Magpie says:

        It is he ‘Pie’s understanding that all political parties have always maintained small teams of party members like Eloise Rowes around the place to push various lines bout what ever is bothering the hierarchy at any one time. With letters published across the country.

      • Russell says:

        RRRyB, why would you include DoK with the other two? He’s on the complete opposite side from NMD and Stephanie. Don’t always agree with him but he speaks from the heart, not some songbook like the other two.

  11. Mike Douglas says:

    The games Labor play in Townsville . Just a week after Steven Miles cancelled a meeting with Phillip Thompson and our Mayor on finalising the $195 mil spend our 3 State MP,s have announced their so -called wishlist of infrastructure , social support , jobs for the Federal Budget . The $195 mil is there for jobs and infrastructure yet the State draws out meeting . Scott Stewart claims Lansdown will deliver 9,000 jobs so if the project is so important to Townsville perhaps a cabinet Minister like Scott can release the plans , ownership structure , budgeted costs , environmental approval . Shouldn’t our 3 State MP s and Mayor be signalling their wish lists for the Queensland budget which is closer to their responsibilities and the people they are supposed to represent . Thanks again to the Pie for bringing to attention the 42 properties to be auctioned clearly not transparent enough for T.C.C. or the Townsville Bulletin .

    • The Magpie says:

      Further to the jobs hypocrisy of our Labor members and the government to which they belong, The Magpie finds it unusual that apart from one small mention by another commenter that there is more genuine (not the PC confected kind) about the dirty deal between Palaszczuk and the CFMEU (or whatever letters they’ve added this week.) Ostensibly designed for those working on Olympic infrastructure, there will be up to a 40% loading on wages. This union’s greedy and unreasonable grab driven by pure self-entitlement is almost certain to return to take a big chunk out of Anna’s less-than-dainty derriere. because one of two things will now happen. The new award will be legislated to apply only to Olympic infrastructure, and other unions will rightly demand equal status. OK, where are the workers coming from to share in this bonanaza? Among other areas, they will come from regional Queensland.

      Ofr the second thing to happen, probably the more likely, is that while the Olympics has been the catalyst, the award will be claimed by the unions for ALL CFMEU (and therefore other unions) in the state.

      Now tell us, what will that do to the ultimate cost of the second stage pipeline, which this busted-arse government cannot even find the promised $195million it so unnecessarily promised for the project. And the flow effect could flow like a high tide across all projects, including building hydrogen plant or any other industry anything at Landsdown, and may even seep local government, creating resentment and unrest in council ranks.

      • Cantankerous but happy says:

        Hopefully the feds requirement that they sit in on any decision requiring Olympic funding might fuck Puddleduck and the unions, the feds could just withdraw funding.

    • Parson Blossomnose says:

      9000 jobs created at Lansdown? Scott Stewart used to be a school teacher … hope it wasn’t maths, economics or social studies.

      • Critical says:

        Fuck how many vehicle movements does this equate to on the two lane road from Stuart Drive and University Drive intersection. Add regular traffic from Charters Towers and centres west to Mount Isa and this sounds like Townsville’s version of gridlock coming up.
        Hope that idiot Scott Stewart is assured to get $$$ from Aunty Anna to 6 lane this section of the Flinders Highway before construction of the ALP and Mullet’s Lansdown dream starts.

        • The Magpie says:

          Don’t worry, he’s on to it … or on something, if he believes all this malarky.

        • Alahazbin says:

          With Stewart and Memory Blank beating the drum for Landsdowne and Harpic is still trying workout where the place is. What is happening over at the Labor Government preferred SPA or whatever the acronym is, on the port access road?

      • Little Rupert says:

        Townsville could not support 9,000 new workers and their families – housing and infrastructure could not handle it.

        • The Magpie says:

          But it’s not as though it will all happen at once, not like Jenny’s goingb to open the flood gates and cause another different disaster.

        • Cantankerous but happy says:

          Easily fixed Rupert, it just allows another 9000 people wanting to leave the joint an opportunity to do so.

      • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

        Perhaps the 9000 “jobs” at Lansdowne are related to the Dogging story at the start of the blog?

  12. Bentley says:

    I see the Chinese junk ( rocket stuff, not a boat ) hit the drink off the Maldives. Lucky.

    • The Magpie says:

      Smirko in Canberra must be most disappointed … it almost could’ve got that whinger Michael Slater.

  13. Oceans 11 says:

    Perhaps the Chinese space junk will settle at the bottom of the ocean with MH370? Another unsolved mystery that disappears into the history books due to not being found in the deep Indian Ocean.

  14. You’ve got mail says:

    Christine Holgate has been appointed as the CEO of Global Express, which is a competitor to Australia Post. Like her or loathe her, she is an excellent CEO. Australia Post and that smirking evangelical fuckwit Morrison will regret shafting her over a couple of fucking watches which she was legally entitled to give executives anyway. I’m sure her payout from Australia spots and her legal win in the not-so-distant future will ensure she never has to beg for food when she finally retires. Good fo her and I (as a male) wish her well.

  15. HiBeam says:

    My wife who is 6 years past her use by date has been told that as of tomorrow she must own a mobile phone to enter a council swimming pool. By order of the Council. Since when has owning a mobile phone become law? Who do these cretins think they are? We shall attend the council chamber this morning to get our FREE MOBILE PHONE and plan? to go with it.

    • The Magpie says:

      How was she advised about this? And on what grounds? On the face of it, either the demand is nonsense or your claim of it is, more detail is needed for any follow-up.

      • Critical says:

        I wonder if this is the TCC way of making everyone use the Check-In Queensland app when using any council venue. However, TCC cannot force you to get a phone etc as the Queensland government website clearly states that if yiu don’t have a phone or can use the app then staff are to manually record your details.
        See Frequently asked questions for customers and scroll down to section What if I don’t have a phone in the link below.

        Pity TCC didn’t get out and monitor the compliance of usage of this app in cafes etc. No signage or QR codes displayed at Otto’s Precinct or Spirited Goat in same venue. I observed large numbers of people purchasing meals and coffee and sitting at tables and consume there over the weekend.


        • The Magpie says:

          The ‘Pie knows he’s not supposed to say this, but COVID isn’t even a starter in Townsville, a fact backed up by the fact that there’s been fuck all cases around here, despite having the biggest population of ‘up yours’ cowboys outside state parliament. So the old bird can’t get too worked up about it all.

      • Little Rupert says:

        HiBeam – sorry to hear your wife is past her use by date. Just check, is it a ‘use by date’ or a ‘best before date’? I learnt this at Cole’s.

  16. Critical says:

    Queensland Audit Office report into local government 2020 website link below.

    Mullet must be soiling her knickers after reading some sections of this report but also thinking of devious ways of using the report to get more grant monies from the state government.

    Happy reading everyone and I’m certain that Pie and others will have relevant comments.


    • The Magpie says:

      Thanks, The ‘Pie will look forward to reading it … which he will do when he gets a spare hour or two.

  17. Lead Auditor says:

    I read the report. What I find amusing and bemusing is how the financial situation for Councils continues to deteriorate, so the report says. But hasn’t Fraudenberg and Father Morrison been telling us that everything is ok, things are back to pre-COVID conditions and unemployment is low and businesses are booming??? If that his true, ruthenium what is Councils excuse for being a basket case? Lying fucks

    • The Magpie says:

      Love new words, but ‘ruthenium’ has got The ‘Pie stumped? Sounds like a real word, some geological precious metal perhaps..

      • No More Dredging says:

        “If that his true, ruthenium what is Councils excuse for being a basket case?”

        There are so many typos, apostrophe fuckups and spelling errors in this sentence it’s hard not to conclude that ‘ruthenium’, although truly an element in the periodic table, is more likely an artefact of predictive text.

      • NQ Gal says:

        Correct – Ru on the periodic table.

        • Little Rupert says:

          From the writings of Dr Google : Ruthenium compounds are encountered relatively rarely by most people. All ruthenium compounds should be regarded as highly toxic and as carcinogenic. Compounds of ruthenium stain the skin very strongly. … Ruthenium oxide, RuO4, is highly toxic and volatile, and to be avoided

        • Achilles says:

          Was that a statement/question?

  18. Dave of Kelso says:

    The demise of investigative journalism a precursor to the return to pre-Fitzgerald Qld politics. Do tell? We in Townsville have been living with this for years, and the CCC is a neutered lapdog of the Qld Parliament to the smug satisfaction of the Mulett.


  19. Mike Douglas says:

    Chalk another one up to the Magpie . 48 hrs after Sunday’s blog the Townsville Bully posts about properties being auctioned for non payment of rates .Typical Mayor Hills “ look over there “ and don’t focus on the large amount of auctions ( is this all or are there more ? ) the Bulletin is tipped off that one of the properties happens to be owned by a different political parties wife . Edison Plaza owners have stated that any outstanding rates have now been paid . Back to 41 properties being auctioned but will the payment of any other properties make front page news ? .

  20. Prince Rollmop says:

    The audit report is extremely concerning. It really shows that the majority of Councils are a complete clusterfuck with insurmountable debt, poor governance, poor policies and procedures and piss-poor staff.

    Here are some interesting ‘picks’ from the Audit report;
    – Most councils with a high reliance on grants from state and federal governments have consistently incurred operating losses each year for the last five years.
    – As of 30 June 2020, 25 councils are at a high risk of not being financially sustainable.
    – As at 30 June 2020, 10 councils (2019: 12 councils) still did not have an audit committee nor an active internal audit function. In addition to that, six councils (2019: six councils) did not have an audit committee and two councils (2019: one council) did not have an active internal audit function.
    – Some councils are not following established procurement processes to demonstrate they have obtained value for money or prove they had the appropriate approvals to obtain goods and services.  
    – Some councils do not have a contract register containing all the necessary information (for example, start and end dates of the contract) they need to manage their contracts effectively.

    What we have is an absolute waste of ratepayer and taxpayer money by mismanaged and incompetent Councils. I would like to see our local Greens Senator, Federal members and local Councillors push to have all of Townsville’s data produced for the public to read and review. After all, it’s OUR money being spent. A transparent and honest Council would have no issue with this. What do you say Mayor Mullet and Prince Ralston – are you both advocates for transparency and do you have the balls to release the audit information about TCC?

    • The Magpie says:

      Rather than ‘ask’ the council to reveal their audit information, can’t ratepayers as a group DEMAND to see it? Indeed, can’t any council be required to make the figures public.

      And the first one to cry ‘Commercial In Confidence’ should face some sort of legal action to prove it.

      Senator Malcolm Roberts has also confirmed, in a detailed statement to the Senate published here a year or so ago, the audit’s conclusion: – Some councils are not following established procurement processes to demonstrate they have obtained value for money or prove they had the appropriate approvals to obtain goods and services.
      – Some councils do not have a contract register containing all the necessary information (for example, start and end dates of the contract) they need to manage their contracts effectively.
      That is nothing more than the audit committee’s polite way of saying there is widespread outright rorting.

      • Achilles says:

        Surely all of these standard tasks and registers are the responsibility of the CEO. If not, he is either derelict in his duties or obsolete and the council is NOT functioning according to legal framework or even best practice.

    • Plannit Townsville says:

      TCC has and always has had, an internal audit function and an audit committee.
      Registers, policies and procedures is not where TCC fails. TCC information is available on the TCC website. But you have to find it. TCC fails in other areas. So stop chasing windmills.

      • Critical says:

        Plannit Townsville sounds like you’re a TCC plant and Mullet supporter with blinkers on. TCC might have registers policies procedures etc but any TCC employee will tell you that they are very broadly written which allows them to be widely interpreted and misquoted when seen fit, many staff pay scant regard to these documents and some don’t know where to find them. However I’m told that these documents are used against staff by management if they want to get rid of a staff member.
        If you know other areas that TCC fails in, then have the balls to let us know.

  21. One legged tap dancer says:

    Another newsworthy story the Townsville Bulletin doesn’t want to know about is a reported NRL investigation into NQ Cowboys legend and the club’s Head of Performance Paul Bowman abusing touch judges twice during a game. This is regarded by the NRL as a serious breach, as reported in the TB’s sister publication the Sunday Mail last weekend, so editor Warhurst can’t claim he doesn’t know about it. Wonder if they will finally report it if he is charged or fined. These days you have to read the southern papers to find out what’s really going on at the Cowboys – unless, of course, its positive, like the opening of their new offices and training field, previously known as the Centre of Excellence.

    • I’ll be plucked says:

      Who cares Hoppy! Touch judges are leper’s who get calls wrong all the time! Nothing new or to see there! :) They deserve a serve or three.

    • Little Rupert says:

      Yes but, can we simply adopt innocent until proven guilty before trial by media. Can’t we?

  22. Achilles says:

    Detainees dig tunnel that would have allowed a herd of undesirables loose on the local community. Why do I have to read this on the BBC and not the Oz media?


  23. Cantankerous but happy says:

    Great initiative in the budget to downsize your home and put $300k of it into super once you are over 60, but for the poor old busted arse bogans of Townsville with a median house price of $330k, you can sell up and buy a second hand caravan to live in, something they can look forward to.

  24. Elusive Butterfly says:

    Mr. Pie, I see Townsville Enterprise’s new CEO, Claudia Brumme-Smith’s first attempt as a spokesperson for the North is a clanger!

    As reported in the Bulletin this week… “New Townsville Enterprise CEO Claudia Brumme-Smith said the region had already benefited greatly with the announcement of a reinsurance pool,”

    I suggest you do a little homework about issues Ms. Brumme-Smith, before, you open your mouth to change feet.
    The details of this reinsurance pool, pushed by Bob Katter, will be worked out over the next 12 months, and, will not be implemented, if ever, in July next year.
    So, please tell me, Ms. Brumme-Smith, how “the region has already benefited greatly?”
    God help us from Townsville’s amateurish “civic” leaders!

    • No More Dredging says:

      Elusive, wasn’t the TEL CEO just repeating the words of Minister Keith Pitt and Phil O’Herbert from a media conference a few days ago? How is that a “clanger”?

    • Fräulein Hilda says:

      A drop in insurance costs will take some time to implement, and certainly Brumme-Shmit has had nothing to do with this announcement whatsoever. She is trying to cash in on other people’s work, and that is a fucked thing to do. Besides, let’s wait and see what the outcome actually is because I don’t believer the insurance companies will take this lying down. They are greedy fucking arseholes and if they give a discount with one hand they will take with the other hand.

    • Little Rupert says:

      I predict with fair certainty that the reinsurance pool will be finalised in time for the next Federal (first attempt at spell check said ‘Feral’, something in that?) Election as a Vote winner.

      • The Magpie says:

        Well, the point about that is – and somehow you make sound like a veiled criticism – if that sorely needed and long overdue scheme is delivered, why wouldn’t someone around this way vote for whomsoever brought it in? That is the way the game is played … sometimes detrimentally (stadium) somne for bdenefit (re-insurance pool).


  25. The Magpie says:

    Well, it was an infinity pool.

    • Deep sea diver says:

      Good one Pie – ‘infinity pool’ ha ha. I feel for this woman’s friends and loved ones, I truly do. But what is it with people acting stupid in dangerous areas and falling and milling themselves? It’s happened a few times in the past year in various places. Selfies, risky behaviour, dares or just plain stupidity, people need to grow up.

      • Dave of Kelso says:

        At the Head of the Bight there are numerous signs warning of the danger of approaching the edge of the cliffs over the Southern Ocean. Stay on the path the signs stated.

        On arrival my darling bride steps over the fencing and goes to look over the cliffs edge.

        I was horrified. What if she had fallen off.

        There would have been me, thousand miles from home, and no one to help hook up the caravan.

  26. Last Drinks says:

    So, Australias largest tropical city is dudded by Fraudenburgs budget. A city and region has been left out again. To not even mention Townsville in the Budget is about standard for this lot. Phil Thompson should hang his head in shame. Always quick to lay into the State and Council, he has failed Townsville just at the moment that we needed him to step up. Also, what about the Trillion Dollar Debt. Once again #Scottyfromcarpeting has been caught out making announcements. Remember “Back in Black” The coffee mugs that the Libs were selling. He is a grifter of the highest order.

    • The Magpie says:

      Nice bit of selective nonsense in there, Drinkies.

    • Dave of Kelso says:


      The following extract from Phill Thompson’s budget email would indicate that there has been funds for Townsville, but there are four speed bumps across the road to delivery, being three blind mice and one mullet.

      195 million – Infrastructure under the Townsville City Deal

      Last year the State Labor Government rejected $195 million of federal funds for Stage 2 of the Haughton Pipeline. This money has remained available for projects in Townsville as part of this budget, however they must fall within the Townsville City Deal, requiring all three levels of Government to agree to the projects. 

      Unfortunately the State Labor Government has caused unnecessary delays to score political points – not turning up to meetings, and proposing projects without detailed costings. The Townsville Council and Mayor have also requested extra time to provide required information on projects they wish to pursue.

      My firm focus remains on getting this money – which is still budgeted for Townsville – out the door, and I call on the State Labor Government and Council to get out of the way of delivering for the people of Townsville.

      • Last Drinks says:

        The $195 Million is just an announcement. Nothing will be spent. That is all Scummo does. Announce. Roll Back. Blame everybody else or say that he did not say it at all.

    • Cantankerous but happy says:

      Don’t worry Last Drinks, The budget for pathetic losers and parasites comes out next month, the Begging Dick is preparing it now, when he stops groveling on the floor that is.

      • Onlooker says:

        In line with “Cantankerous but happy ” comments today, this graph
        reflects the impact on ratepayers in Townsville very much due to leadership
        of the City .

        • Russell says:

          Thanks for the graph, Onlooker. Yes it’s bad but not near as bad as that chart makes out. The reduction is about $30k in $365k, or around 8%. This would be obvious if the vertical axis started at zero. The chart shown is designed to make it look like house prices have fallen to less than half what they were, which is way off the mark.

          • Cantankerous but happy says:

            Not so Russell, are you related to NMD at all, does no one in this fucking shithole town understand appreciating assets, inflation, no wonder Townsville is a business backwater. The average Australian house price has risen by approximately 6% a year over the long term, so the graph decline is actually quite close to the real slope. $364k at 6% a year is $516k, so the drop to $325k is roughly 37% drop in real terms, a staggering loss, certainly not half but well above the 8% mark.

    • Old Tradesman says:

      Hey Final Straw, since you are a paid up member of the Each Way Albo club, will you be standing for the federal seat of Herbert or are you making way for The Mayor as dumbo Albo is recruiting as many mayors as he can so that if they should happen to win the rate payers can have another by election?

      • Last Drinks says:

        I would do a better job than Sock Puppet Phil.

        • The Magpie says:

          Oh just soooo convincing.

          Seriously, why do you and others make comments like that? It adds nothing to any debate or discussion, it is just empty gum flapping. We’re well aware you’re a Labor plant, The Nest is a broad church, but at least put up some kind of argument or debatable point.

          Just childish.

  27. Elusive Butterfly says:

    NMD…if that’s the case, it makes it an even more deafening clanger!
    She can’t think for herself and doesn’t check facts.
    I rest my case!

  28. Prince Rollmop says:

    Well, TCC is about to get worse. Central Highlands Regional Council’ (Emerald) CEO has been hired as a ‘’Director’ at TCC. This bloke is a weird one, very weird. Just when you think that things aren’t warped enough! Oh dear, the TCC Prince and the Mullet have excelled themselves with this ‘captains pick’. Whatever you do, don’t ask him about the Emerald quarry starting back in 2013 with the purchase of a $13m white elephant, culminating in environmental non-conformances topped off with a cheap sale to the Wagner group. And then there is the below link in which their Council gets a mention about dodgy executives going to prison!!
    Not locked behind a Gaywall;

    • Hee haw says:

      Would that be the same Wagners who were getting millions to build an Adani Airstrip? The same Wagner’s who had NO contact with TCC about the airstrip yet were mentioned in the minutes of the meeting? The names keep popping up connecting dots

  29. Prince Rollmop says:

    And I wonder why a CEO on $450k would drop down to a Director position on $200k????

    • The Magpie says:


    • The Magpie says:

      And do we have a name to go with this?Ig someone is hired at executive level at the TCC – any council, in fact – we are entitled to know whon it is we’re paying, and to do what.

      • Prince Rollmop says:

        For you Mr Magpie, anything you ask I shall grant – Scott Mason is the name.

        As for the ????, I guess I am sort of highlighting an interesting hypothesis; why does a CEO on $450k resign to take on a lower ranked position of ‘Director’ on $200k? Just sayin…..

        • The Magpie says:

          Sorry, it was a small housekeeping matter, crossed wires here. You’re comment – very valid and certainly interesting – was not in reply to anyone, even yourself, and the way these comments operate, in that case, others don’t have a clue to what your referring. Which is what The ‘Pie was asking.

          All clear now, and seems there may well be an unfolding story here.

          • Prince Rollmop says:

            Not a problem old mate, I do speak in tongues sometimes so just call me Scott Morrison. And yes Master, I reckon there is a story unfolding here as well. Perhaps Mr Mason is being lined up for future CEO just in case FIFO Prince Ralston’s tenure is to be shorter than expected for some reason?
            And I wonder;
            When TCC will announce Mr Mason’s hiring?
            Will Mr Mason be relocating to the Ville or will he too be FIFO?
            What exactly is his role and confirmed salary?

        • Little Rupert says:

          It’s not unusual, from a work life balance perspective, that a person would take a lesser pay for less roles and responsibilities.

          • The Magpie says:

            A $200K financial haircut doesn’t sound very balanced at all, and it does not necessarily mean there will be less hours or much less responsibility …. at least one would hope not at $200K p.a of ratepayers hard earned.

            You’re such a sweet, innocent thing, petal, we love you despite your name.

    • Alahazbin says:

      PR, Is $450K the std for CEO’s throughout the state or does each LG entity determine the salary.
      Coming to TCC he may be on a rise.

      • The Magpie says:

        The ‘Pie’s understanding is that it is a negotiable amount, decided between the CEO, the mayor and senior LG officials. Could be wrong, but seem to remember Ray Burton shooting for around $600k.

        • Prince Rollmop says:

          Alahazbin, the Pie is spot on. Salaries are often higher and larger Councils pay their CEO’s the most. Councillor wages follow a similar principle, normally larger Councils pay bigger bucks.

  30. The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

    Have a quick look at TCC Facebook feed. There is a story about relining a sewer in Cranbrook. The bottom left photo has some shit in the pipe – I can’t find a way to share it, but have a look before it disappears.

    This is why we should have adults doing TCC public relations.

    • Prince Rollmop says:

      Well Civil Engineer, the current budget doesn’t contain any more crumbs for spending on infrastructure before the end of this financial year. Prince Ralston and department heads (mostly the finance folk) are feverishly working on the 2021/22 budget draft. It has has to be completed after 31 May 2021 but before 1 August 2021. So I would suggest that anybody in a position to place pressure on our local elected fuckwits to include a decent allotment of money for water treatment and sewerage upgrades/repairs start lobbying and putting pressure on the elected fools and Council CEO right now! It would be nice if some sewerage spilled into the offices of the local newspapers as that might motivate them to support our community rather than do what they normally do and that is kiss the Mayors spotty ass.

      • The Magpie says:

        Your knowledge of the mayor’s nether regions is impressive, but one wonders how on earth yo …. no let’s not bother.

      • The (Barely) Civil Engineer says:

        Seems you did not see the picture – our beloved Mayor and leader was pictured at the end of a sewer pipe – seemed funny to me.

  31. Elusive Butterfly says:

    Prince Mollop…you’re dreary ramblings are becoming almost unbearable.!

    Why don’t you qualify your insufferable utterances with absolute fact instead of trying to dominate an extremely viable local blog with your “he said, she said” garbage?

    I’m sure there’s a TCC Ward crying out for you?


    • The Magpie says:

      In that case, care to provide some ‘absolute facts’ for us? Otherwise, your comment in just empty-headed abuse.

    • Prince Rollmop says:

      Excrement Flutterby, you really are a 100% fuckwit. I’ve noticed that you never drop any new or interesting information onto this blog. All you do is troll other people and drop loads of shit from your keyboard. But I do like your sensitive feelings. It shows that you are fairly close to the fire. Perhaps a Councillors partner? Maybe you are Celine? I challenge you to put something forward that is ‘fact’ that nobody else yet knows. You won’t, and you know why? You are full of piss and wind.

  32. Elusive Butterfly says:

    Goodness me…Mr. Pie…you are so predictable…

    • The Magpie says:

      That means absolutely nothing, and you really aren’t contributing to this discussion. Try harder – with less adjectives.

  33. Mike Douglas says:

    “ Thou protest too much “ . If ever there was an example of our Mayor and local State MP,s priorities on their jobs and their party are their antics and comments on the Federal Budget . T.C.C. didn’t get any $ to cover the large bill for broken pipeline or Lansdown or Aaron any $ to run pipelines under River way drive expansion . So even though the people they represent got childcare support , income tax offset , possibility of lower insurance costs , instant write off for small business , funded apprenticeships all things that create cashflow and jobs our local Labor reps are whinging . Aarons priority in Parliament yesterday was not about stolen cars , crime , ambulance ramping at hospitals for his electorate it was the $195 mil from Phil Thompson and in fact he had to withdraw comments on our Federal Member twice . Then there’s our Mayor a few weeks ago toeing the Party line saying “ Townsville will be in financial calamity when jobkeeper finishes “ . I will park that in the 30,000 people living in the cbd , mining airstrip , Council library / arts going into the Hive and most other statements from our Mayor .

  34. One legged tap dancer says:

    Local reaction to the budget on Seven News last night was more than interesting.
    First Jenny Hill bleats about lack of funding for her pet projects like the Landsdown fiasco.
    Then the new TEL CEO gives the budget the thumbs-up, closely followed a glowing assessment from the Chamber of Commerce president.
    Could it be that TEL and the COC have realised that threatening the local Federal member with being “cut” doesn’t get results.
    Or have they just had enough of the mayor’s bullying tactics?
    Phil Thompson is calling the shots in Townsville now and no amount of foot stamping or hissy fitting by the mayor is going to change that.
    Poor Jenny.

  35. Russell says:

    The comment was in relation to the graph and the information conveyed, Cranky (might be time to drop the “but Happy” BTW).

  36. Big Bopper says:

    I very much appreciate this blog, its content and its contributors (most of them). This is my first post but I am a long time reader and hopefully the Magpie doesn’t mind if I digress from this weeks subject matter, but with all that is happening with Federal budgets, public servants wanking on to ministers desks and the grotesque Palasczuk being called out for hiring only female coppers and discriminating against males, we need to keep the pressure and a bright spotlight on the following locally based elected individuals;
    * MAYOR MULLET JENNY HILL for her misadventure behind the wheel of her car in which a motorcyclist died.
    * LES MESSAGEBANK WALKER for his public drunkenness and fist fight in a public place.
    Both of these individuals are ‘pustules on the buttocks of life’ and need to be held to account for their disgusting actions and not be allowed to slip beneath the radar because of other things happening locally.

    Best regards

    • The Magpie says:

      Welcome aboard, Mr Richardson, can we call you JP?

      Regarding subject matter … always your choice.

      Regarding Jenny hill’s driving causing death charge: that is going forward at the usual glacial but unstoppable pace of the judicial system, so she wil, be held to account on the outcome of the matter.

      Regarding Memory B labnk Walker … he will continue nto be the flagbearer of all that is wrong with our political system and the Labor Party’s selection criteria and disciplinary principles. Since honourability, honesty and respect for the citizens is something ALL politicians in Australia (and the USA) have discarded for financial convenience, the only way Walker can be held to account is at the ballot box. And good luck with that in this impacted colon of a city.

      And stopping things slipping below the radar is the aim of this blog and the opportunity of its readers to keep matters that the Bulletin tires of in plain view..

      • The (Barely) Civil Engineer says:

        Today’s paper talks of a fool who drank and took MDMA all day before driving from Cairns to Townsville, killing an innocent couple on the way. Judge seemed sad that the experience of gaol might traumatise him (a bit like losing a child did to the two other families) and decided not to send him away and not to even record a conviction.

        Perhaps our Lady Mullet could consider this defence? “Sir, I was drunk and on drugs…”

      • Airline says:

        Bye_Bye Miss Amercian Pie

  37. Elusive Butterfly says:

    Mollop… you should change your name to Prince Charming as your foul language and abuse is just that…

    • The Magpie says:

      Then you must become the Elusive Butterfly of Love.

    • Prince Rollmop says:

      Elected Butterscotch, if the only thing left in life for me is to upset you, I will die happy! So thank you. But on a more serious note, it’s not my language that offends you, it is my contempt for crooked and/or incompetent politicians. But that’s ok petal, you just relax and enjoy the show as there is more to be said. Now, back to the main show……

  38. Hee Haw says:

    I was drawn by something on Linkedin to look at this Smart Precinct NQ website, funded by councils effectively, it looked to me like another TEL but just a little different.


    But then I looked at this page , have a look at the six items listed there.

    Item 1 is still open
    Item 2 Closed
    Item 3 Closed
    Item 4 Past tense
    Item 5 Past tense
    Item 6 Closed

    Brilliant, fucking brilliant. What a very Smart Precinct” we have.


  39. Elusive Butterfly says:

    Oh Mr Pie…I’m all aflutter!

  40. Dave of Kelso says:

    Tomorrow starting 9AM a gathering outside Phil Thompson’s office to protest at the intersection the recent unrestrained criminal actions of the Pride of First Nations youth, AKA the little snots.

    Yesterday 10 stolen cars and one caravan plus the associated dangerous driving.

    Hello Aaron Harper and Puddleduck.

    • The Magpie says:

      Yeah, OK, but why Phil Thompson’s office? Just to give PT a chance to get up Mayor Mullet’s nose, yet again?

      Oh, OK, he ‘Pie will see if he can fly over.

      • Dave of Kelso says:

        It is just a safe assembly point at a busy intersection. Even a policeman was there to welcome us. He had just come from dealing with another stolen car in Railway Estate.

  41. HiBeam says:

    Kokoda Pool Covid Policy
    Further to my previous comment on May 10 when I said the Kokoda Pool attendant had told my wife that she would need a mobile phone with the app to get in after Wednesday next because the council said so, I attended Kokoda pool today and asked what I had to do to gain entry. Pay $4 I was told! What about the covid rules I asked?
    You have to scan the thing on the counter I was told by the kiddy at the counter. I don’t think so I said, all I have to do is give you my contact details as written on this piece of paper. No you have to scan the thing, it’s a government thing, everywhere you go you have to do it. I advised the kiddy that she was in error and should look up the rules as I had before giving out erroneous advice or she might find herself in a world of pain.
    Another person, older, said she would get the manager. Out came a lady of more senior years than either of the previous staff members and asked did I have a reason for not using the app. I said I did as my phone is owned by my employer and I am not permitted to add or subtract apps.
    That’s OK she said and took my piece of paper with my contact details and assured me that when my wife attended next Monday with a piece of paper with her details on it she would be admitted.
    Goes to show doesn’t it? Good staff are hard to get! Many myrmidons make the rules up as they go to suit themselves, most have a uniform instead of an education or an IQ which does not stretch to double figures.

    • Little Rupert says:

      Damn our ‘first world’ problems !

    • Grumpy says:

      Fucking dickhead.

      Apart from humiliating and terrorising a couple of “kiddies” and making an absolute arsehole of yourself, what exactly did you achieve by creating such a scene?

      Did it make you feel smug and superior, you pathetic little man?

      You must have an empty, sad life.

  42. Achilles says:

    Clever caption in today’s’ on line The Australian re the Chinese rover landing on Mars.
    Nihao Mars: Nihao Mah is Good Morning in Chinese.


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