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The Magpie

Sunday, October 23rd, 2022   |   222 comments

Down For The Count? ?  Even Les Walker Seems To Think He’s Finally Fucked.

After his idiotic and insulting behaviour towards fallen police, the Mundingburra Mauler refused to resign, but would not confirm that he would stand again for a second term.  And therein lies a danger for Townsville, as The Magpie will explain.

Reluctance to jump or be pushed overboard appeared to be the political flavour of the week … Senator  Lidia Thorpe opened more than her doors to her bikie boyfriend who was being investigated by the very parliamentary committee of which she was member. But the Greens reaction so far has taken Australian politics to a new low.

Full of cabbage kimchi and Soju wine, Korean tourist Mayor Mullet blurted back into town, but has failed to let us in on any achievements to justify her claim that her Seoul sojourn was a business trip.  And The ‘Pie has a big question about her entourage for the jolly.

We also have Quote of the Week, Hypocrite of the Week , Worst Headline of the decade, and our regular Madness America gallery.

The Magpie’s Nest takes no advertising and depends on the generosity of its readers to keep operating. If you want to help – it would be really appreciated – the donate button is at the end of the blog. Thanks.

Dummy Is As Dummy Does

Les Walker has always put The Magpie in mind of a female colleague in London back in the 70s,. who grew tired newsroom jibes that she was so useless she couldn’t organize a piss-up in a brewery.  So to score points without losing her cool, she secretly organised a tour and drinks party at the local brewery in Fulham. At the after-drinks, she would reveal that , see, she could indeed organise a piss-up in a brewery. All work mates received an unsigned invitation to the night, but as time wore on, she waited in vain. No one turned up. Because she’d put the wrong date on the invitation.

It appears that a brewery tour would be way out of Les Walker’s scope, he managed to bring the world down on his head with a simple book gift. And blaming his staff for choosing ‘Forensics For Dummies’ as a gift for schools at a function to honour police officers killed on duty added acid to the outcry. The Courier started a trending theme.


And The ‘Pie and some readers were quick to join the brigade offering helpful suggestions.

The Magpie 

October 20, 2022 at 10:12 am  (Edit)

Qld Police Union

Christmas gift suggestion of two books for you to give Les Walker.

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The (barely) Civil Engineer 

October 20, 2022 at 10:21 am  (Edit)

New edition out shortly with preface by Les Walker.

 Screen Shot 2022-10-20 at 10.24.04 am

And then was a one very rude one that funny enough in the moment to include, but not without due consideration, as explained.


October 20, 2022 at 10:40 am  (Edit)

I’m sure this is on Mr Leaver’s  list.


The Magpie

October 20, 2022 at 11:09 am  (Edit)

Your comment is published under Magie Rule Number 3(section 2, para 1): humour trumps propriety when merited.

Just don’t anyone get any ideas that this a new leniency in the already Wild West of comment language in The Nest. You will still need to use euphemisms to substitute for the ‘C’ word, like (‘Nick) Kyrgios’, (Donald) Trump, ‘(Alan) Jones’ or ‘Tony Bligh’.

Then, Les managed to confirm that he had conclusively parted company with reality when asked if he would resign. He replied:

“I’m very good at what I do and I represent the people every day of the week and I’m doing it right now.’

Perhaps he is good at doing what he does, but that’s not much use when no one knows what he actually does.

Then, alarm bells started sounding with this …

Screen Shot 2022-10-22 at 1.21.57 pm

That sounds very like leslie is on his very last warning.

But hang on … OK, like the limpet on the public tit he has always been, Les will hang in there for the dough for as long as he can, but when turfed out – by either the Premier or the voters – what could he do? He’s never had a real non-government job in his life (we’ll ignore the failed pizza shop venture, Les’s ‘pissup in a brewery’ moment).On the outer with Labor, no nice little bullshit earners are likely to come his way,  so it’s safe that the public sector is not on the cards …. So … OH NO, PLEASE GOD, NO!!! Could Les plan to resign from parliament before his term ends but within the time frame that doesn’t require a by election? And thus, make a run for the ownsville mayoralty which he once thought was soon to be his anyway before Hill did a Hawke on him. hill may well get a tap on the shoulder if she keeps on the way she, notwithstanding her Labor-favouring position with the LGAQ board. His resignation could be timed so he could have a gallop in the Walker Street bun fight in March 2024 …. that’s six months ahead of the state election, so he’d have to be off the plush sometime in the second half of ’23,  and pounding the local streets by then.

Normally, you’d think this wouldn’t be a worry, but when you see who those for whom the local witless vote into Walker Street, be afraid, be very afraid.

Silly Pillocks

The usual suckers lined up to make fools of themselves during the week when some boffins announced they’d come up with a seaweed pill to stop cattle farting and burping. And thus help slow climate change. Political disappointment of the year David Littleproud decided the idea was somehow going to destroy the weekend Aussie BBQ (???). It all quickly died down when the subject had it’s 15 minutes of tomfoolery (good idea, stupid reaction, next news item please), but Bentley reckons we should be sparing a thought for those closest to the problem.

seagrass small

Perhaps the Beetrooter’s missus, the fragrant Vicki, could pop a couple in Barnaby’s morning vodka … apart from maybe lessening his burping and farting, it might stop a lot of the bullshit he emits.

Speaking of Mrs Joyce …

Vicki name appears over the weekly column obviously written by her husband, in a deal with Rupert toi give the Nats free campaigning exposure. But Vicki nevertheless has to own whatever the columns say.  And this week, she seems to be suffering a lack of self-awareness.

Screen Shot 2022-10-22 at 11.14.36 am

Quite right, Vicki.

First order of testing is: was her bikie squeeze a married man?

Second order of testing: were they rooting in a ministerial office?

You seem uniquely well positioned to make the call – ask Barnaby to let us know in next week’s column.

But Lidia Thorpe’s bikie riding and the whispering of sweet somethings in his ear is all a misunderstanding, according to The Shovel.

Thorpe Screen Shot 2022-10-21 at 10.46.16 am

Seoul Searching

Searched around all week for the big news from Jenny trip to Korea, must surely be something big in the background, but nothing yet … must be commercial in confidence. The boss of the Dudley Do Nothings, Claudia Brumme-Smith (affectionately known as Utter B-S) wrote a page worth of words that said precisely and concisely absolutely nothing. Should’ve been headlined ‘Bromides Of B-S’.

The Magpie filled in some background last Monday.

The Magpie 

October 17, 2022 at 10:15 pm  (Edit)

The Purple Doona gets another outing.

It all just gets worse. But where to start.

This happy snap raises more question for our mayor – and for Ms Claudia ‘Utter’ B-S.

Screen Shot 2022-10-17 at 9.23.50 pm

First of all, this is a meeting with the folks from Australian Chamber of Commerce in Korea. So our delegation was meeting with the people who were already there to do what you’re pretending to do, promote Townsville. If it was needed to bring Townsville to the attention of these good folks, did you have to stiff the ratepayers to rock up and pointlessly bore them shitless – your fax broken? We also have a happy snap of them sitting around a table …

Screen Shot 2022-10-17 at 9.56.52 pm

talking about … oh, fuck knows, maybe best Seoul bars for a good time with some bikers? Any notes from the meeting which may shed light on the importance of this tete-a-tete? (Joking, just joking, settle down.)

The second – and more disheartening issue – revolves around that chubby-cheeks on the right. This bloke …

Screen Shot 2022-10-17 at 4.55.21 pm

… is one Jonte Verwey, who is described in the Australian Chamber of Commerce in Korea photo caption as ‘Councillor Advisor’. So Jenny took along, at ratepayer expense, the bloke supposed to be her personal ‘advisor’ but who in fact is a Labor wannabee and spare wheel foisted on the mayor by a pissed-off Palaszczuk who was annoyed by his pimply idiocy. It has long been know that Mr Verwey is totally ignored by Mayor Mullet, his hair style seemingly the result of standing side on for the latest blast from the mayor about his inadequacies. This jaunt is presumably some sort of reward for perseverance – courtesy of the Townsville ratepayers.
Mr Verwey has featured in this blog before, when his dismal standing in the Labor Employment Agency was revealed by a Labor insider. He aspires to have a say in our city’s governance despite never having had a real job, let alone a business that employs people, in his entire short life.

And The ‘Pie was devastated … devastated I say … when he discovered this when he had a look (for the first time ever) …

Screen Shot 2022-10-17 at 4.36.36 pm

The final question is who is the rather pleasant-looking, uncredited lass on the left. Clearly not Chamber staff but a visitor  (the neck tag says so) so one presumes she’s with Ms Utter B-S. The ‘Pie has tried to line her up with TEL ‘Meet Our Team’ pics, but nothing seems a certain match. And she isn’t seen here in meeting photograph – so does that mean Ms Utter B-S took along her own photographer? Or did Jenny?

This old bird has no axe to grind with this young lady, but be interesting to know who paid for her presence at this crucial, ground-breaking meeting the outcome of which that we will never actually know about – should something accidentally of a substance have occurred, it will of course be Commercial in Confidence.

But seems it was a good dress rehearsal for Mayor Mullet’s address to the UN General Assembly, which she is sure is just around the corner. The dress of course being the Purple Doona.

Christ, this town, fair dinkum.

Much Of Our Attention During The Week Was Elsewhere Overseas

Specifically, pommyland.

More than enough is being said elsewhere about British politics and the Tories search for a new leader after Liz Truss resigned just 44 days into a job she was clearly unqualified for … even to be a wicked Prime Minister takes a certain intelligence (around amoebae level nowadays it seems) but politically, she didn’t even reach those giddy heights. In fact, Loopy Liz failed the role as a political doctor-by-name to the Tory agony of political hernia. – the precis definition couldn’t be more accurate either way: “a hernia truss can help you feel more comfortable temporarily, but it doesn’t treat the hernia.”

Tory MP’s are so livid with incoherent rage that their analogies have set a new record for vindictiveness … and that’s saying something when it comes to British politics.

As the storm broke over her inept head, here’s a few samples of the strangled fury of members of her own party – The Magpie just loves the image of the first one of a woman trapped in a loveless marriage.

She’s a balled-up apron of disappointment and regret.

I hope a seagull picks her up and drops her in the middle of the Atlantic – she an absolute berk

It’s not a question of if she goes, it’s a question of fuck off.

She has the aptitude and charisma of a crisp packet in a high wind, And I want her chased out of Downing Street by wolves.

British political subtly and wit seems to also be a casualty of the times, so thnk God for the wonderful wordsmith Marina Hyde in the Guardian  who described the Tories renewed vetting of leadership contenders as ‘a binfire of the vanities’.

Someone let us know where to send the food parcels.

But It Was All Manna From Conservative Heaven For Cartoonists

… especially the Daily Mail stunt of photography a head of lettuce each day, saying it would outlast Truss.

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The Most Misjudged Headline Of The Year.

The jury in the Brittany Higgins/Bruce Lehrmann, rape trial returns to continue deliberations tomorrow (Monday). They have the difficult task of deciding a matter of ‘he said/she said’. The eventual verdict is going to be an interesting test of ‘beyond reasonable doubt’,  since there is not a single shred of forensic evidence and just boils down to what two people claim. Given this situation, The Magpie';s bet is, if in the unlikely case Lehman is convicted, he will successfully appeal.

It was this situation that led to one of the most egregious headline imaginable, as The ‘Pie reported last week.

The Magpie 

October 16, 2022 at 10:37 am  (Edit)

WT Actual F!!!


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Sometimes, you imagine that the great News Ltd journalist character on Mad As
Hell wasn’t a joke, but factual reporting.

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  • Alacan

October 16, 2022 at 10:59 am  (Edit)

Subterranean .. what a disgusting piece of shit that author must be


  • The Magpie

October 16, 2022 at 11:58 am  (Edit)

Not just the author, it is always ultimately the editor’s responsibility.

And cop this … IT’S A WOMAN, Gemma Jones.

Gemma Jones Screen Shot 2022-10-16 at 11.53.26 am

Gemma Jones, editor, Adelaide Advertiser

A really bad blue, and it won’t be just the sisterhood out after her. But she’s well grounded in this sort of sleaze; before being appointed as Advertiser editor in 2021, Jones was …ta da … deputy editor of the Sydney Telegraph.

So it sort of figures, she was the ideal candidate to infect SA with Murdoch’s cancer.

Back In The ‘Ville, Dancing In The Streets

The Magpie
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Why didn’t they think of this before?


An Indigenous-led justice group is taking an active new approach to curb youth crime in Townsville, getting sworn in as JPs and taking part in cautioning and conferencing first-time offenders.
Attorney-General Shannon Fentiman said members of the Townsville Justice Group (TJG) are now able to participate in youth justice conferencing and have also received additional training to become JP Magistrates.
“Reducing rates of serious youth offending and making the criminal justice system more culturally appropriate for Indigenous peoples are key priorities for our government,” she said.

Wonderful news … no more of this mucking around with tougher bail laws or GPS trackers or real punishment, Once this group cranks up into gear, feel safe to leave your cars in the street, windows down and keys in the ignition … safe as houses at last.

Aaron, your a champion, mate.

The World Watches Nervously As The Midterms Approach

Bumbling Biden or Rapacious Republicans … it’s a bugger of a choice, a sort of reverse of Sophie’s Choice for a nation where democracy is truly under threat. temporary incompetence or permanent fascism. And still no prosecution of the mobster ex-president, despite a mountain of evidence he is a straight-out traitor.

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‘Specials’ Memo

Not when I went to school, Coles.

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And A Last Laugh



See you again next week, the good lord and finances willing. The donate button is below.

The Magpie's Nest is now more than five years old, and remains an independent alternative voice for Townsville. The weekly warble is a labour of love and takes a lot of time to put together. So if you like your weekly load of old cobblers, you can help keep it aloft with a donation, or even a regular voluntary subscription. Paypal is at the ready, it's as easy as ... well, easy as pie. Limited advertising space is also available.


  1. Prince Rollmop says:

    It’s been wonderful watching Kid Crisafulli taking it to the inept Queensland Labor government over the past few weeks. He has hammered them on everything from Queensland health ambulance ramping, to kiddy crime and defective trains. Good to see this energetic opposition leader working hard to show up this putrid Labor government for what it really is.

    Now now Elusive Butterflog, don’t pop a foofer valve because I mentioned the name ‘Crissafulli’. We all know how emotional you get.

    • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

      The “opposition in waiting” is giving the kid a huge amount to work with. Maybe their strategy is to wear him out before the election by being grossly incompetent every chance they get.

      The Mullet is using that other popular topic of mimiking monkeys throwing Poo at the walls so they have no idea what is going on or where the real shit is.

    • Ducks Nuts says:

      Stinky fish, Crisafulli might look wonderful as opposition leader. He is very good at finger pointing. Jumping up and down about things he doesn’t like. And pulling media stunts. But when the time comes and he gets voted in as the premier, don’t say you weren’t warned. He’s a miserable, small minded little man. Think frying pan and fire. Queensland deserves so much better.

      • The Magpie says:

        Your last line is the only correct thing in your ‘fair and balanced view’.

      • Prince Rollmop says:

        We will see if your assertions about the Kid are correct in a couple of years time. You see, my comment is based upon what I have seen him do as Opposition Leader, things that have been proven. It’s a good foundation he can build upon. However, Avian Testicles, your comment is based upon an unproven theory as the Kid has yet to be given the opportunity to lead Queensland as Premier. And to be honest, a resurrected Joh Bjelke-Petersen could do a better job than the pathetic Palletchook guvmint.

        • Jatzcrakers says:

          Prince R, you’re 100% on the money with the Kid ! Forget these labor flogs. The Kid is continuingly highlighting all of the failings of this inept Puddleduck State Government.
          Like Fran in TCC, he’s calling their cards and they’re holding fuck all. Ducks Nuts probable got a DCM and was pissed off because he didn’t cut it in the integrity department and was found out.
          The kid will be our next Premier and I can’t wait to see the hidden skeletons and agendas he’s going to have to pull out of the cupboard when he moves in to George Street !
          And Ducks Nuts…Fuck you too !!

          • Ducks Nuts says:

            Nawww aren’t you sweet.
            Don’t worry. Crisafulli has his own skellingtons.

          • The Magpie says:

            Like what? And why not tell us, since you clearly want to damage our next premier? You’re losing on this one, nutsack. Put up or shut up.

      • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

        Only can comment on his time in Council but the kid showed he was a reasonable person who listened to a range of advice and asked smart questions before making decisions to benefit the community not just himself or his party. He is the complete opposite of the Maltese Fuckup.

        • The Magpie says:

          … and The ‘Pie knows for a fact that The Kid didn’t have any divisional discrimination. When he received numerous complaints that walker wasn’t noting their requests and complaints and never even answering them, The Kid sorted a lot of the problems out without making a big song and dance about it. And when The ‘Pie got wind of Les’s arrogance, the name Messagebank was born.

  2. Ratepayer says:

    The Pie’s observation that there has been no follow-up on Jenny Hill’s junket to South Korea to inform ratepayers about what they got for their money has got me thinking about what other mysteries the Townsville Bulletin has refused to clear up. Like the crowd numbers for the dying V8 Superpest weekend (organisers said they would be available in a few days but nothing but silence for 3 months – probably still counting the heads and multiplying by 4)), and what’s happening at the Mayor’s decreed huge “success” – the Cowboys stadium – between the end of the footy season and the start of next year’s comp (nothing to report it seems), or the numbers of tourists flooding into Townsville as a result of Townsville Enterprise’s stunning Nah, it’s Townsville tourism campaign, or whether the TEL constitution has been amended to allow Kevin “Rhymes With” Gill to remain as chairman. Obviously the handful of cub reporters left at the Bully must be too busy following up on which pussy has been voted Townsville’s cutest.

  3. Mike Douglas says:

    Have Labor Feds and State reactivated the Brisbane Line and havnt told us ? . $700 mil blow out on the Rockhampton Ring Road , $2.2 Bil Qld Govt departments , $3 bil on Cross river Rail and another $ bil on 3 other road projects Brisbane and the Gold Coast . So there goes the States Coal royalties . The Feds are cutting back $10 bil of regional Australia projects in the budget and possibly $5.8 bil Hells Gate . Our Mayor is competitive so $3 mil blow out on a $5.5 mil Thuringowa library relocation .

  4. Elusive Butterfly says:

    Hey Mr. Pie…that female colleague of yours in London.
    She wasn’t, by any chance, related to David Crisafulli was she??

  5. Regular reader says:

    So Ducks Nuts, who would you like to see as our next Premier, Miles, D’ath or maybe even Walker?

    • The Magpie says:


    • Ducks Nuts says:

      In a perfect world RR I’d like to see the whole lot burned to the ground. Our political system is fucked. True representation in any political party hasn’t been achieved for some time. The available options are inept, demonstrating poor leadership and a lack of charisma and integrity.

      They haven’t got there on merit. They’ve got there because we voted against some other dead head. We voted in the least worst. When we should be voting in the most capable.

      • The Magpie says:

        mate, it has always been thus, unfortunately. Once on the gravy train, they don’t even bother with a condescending wave to the wheel tappers and gandy dancers trackside.

  6. Elusive Butterfly says:

    And Mr. Pie, why use unnecessary foul language in the title of this weeks blog? Some of us who frequent this blog are of a religious nature and lived at a time when such language was frowned upon.

    • The Magpie says:

      Times change, and so does the definition of foul language … as a kid, even ‘damn’ was off limits and ‘bloody’ earnt a clip on the lughole. Back then, ‘fuck’ meant a vigorous encounter with dad’s razor strop and being confined to my room for a whole day.The world worked it way through shit, and then, through widespread repetition, fuck has become the new bloody … and as meaningless, not at all referring to its original meaning. but as pointed out regarding the last big taboo word, which The ‘Pie can honestly say he never heard until he got his first job as a storeman, while it is being heard more and more in movies and on TV cop shows, it will not be welcome here any time soon.

      And anyone who thinks it will be allowed can fuck off.

    • The Magpie says:

      The ‘Pie notes that you have started your interrogatory comment with ‘And’ … which indicates you were replying to something but you failed to designate to whom the comment was directed. Thus this thread will probably be out there on nits own. Please make sure you use the reply button.

  7. The Magpie says:

    Sincere thanks for the heads up, Sara … the tail end of the blog, usually in the early hours, is where I’m likely to make mistakes like that. Suitably amended.


  8. Elusive Butterfly says:

    Speaking of politics, Mr. Pie, not sex or religion, can anyone tell me who is the QLD LNP spokesperson on Indigenous Affairs?
    And, if you can answer that, please tell me just how many media statements has that person, since taking up the job, released on the obvious indigenous problems, that, just about every city and town in QLD is currently experiencing?

    • The Magpie says:

      Believe it was King Billy Cokebottle, but no replacement has been found apparently since he died. Some years ago.

    • Prince Rollmop says:

      Elusive Buttplug, still desperately looking for a way to besmirch the LNP I see, by asking the Magpie a totally pointless and imbecilic question. You really are a pathetic Labor party foot soldier aren’t you? Jenny and Anna must love you at election time as you busily put up election signs and hand out how-to-vote cards. Then of course you attend as many campaign strategy meetings that you can, ogling your beloved Labor politicians as they preach to their acolytes (shitkickers) from the podium. You sad sad muppet.

    • Achilles says:

      Praps EB, you should take the advise of Adam Bandt AG to a smug reporter and “Google it”.

  9. Steve, Belgian Gardens says:

    The man pictured in the Korea photograph is clearly not the same person as that on the twitter screenshot.

    • The Magpie says:

      Ignoring your impertinent and totally false opening rivel (edited out of your published comment), you make a reasonable point worth discussing, but don’t agree the difference is ‘clear’.

      First, to be absolutely clear, Jonty Verwey WAS on the excursion as Mayor Mullet’s ‘advisor’ – and that is the central point to the piece.

      The Magpie has already been told by a contact that the person in the pic is not Jonty Verwey, but admits there are similarities (what are the odds of TWO people being that unfortunate?) Contact also confirms that Verwey was on the trip, which is the underlying point of the piece.

      The Nest article was based partly on this information and photograph from the Australian Chamber of Commerce in Korea. The information can reasonably be expected to mean that the goofy looking bloke on the end is Verwey.

      Before publication, The ‘Pie compared the pic with several file photographs of Verwey, and since they were all some years old, The ‘Pie figured this was what he looked like after a few years in a good paddock (and possibly does or probably will). And he’s wearing a visitor ID, which reasonably reinforces the idea.

      But The Magpie now admits doubt when you look at the seating in the meeting …

      … it may well be that the bloke with his back to us and manning the steno’s notebook may be Verwey, with the other fella clearly on the host side of the table.

      Bottom line: The Magpie will accept there is misidentification and suitable amendments will be made. But whether its him or not, Jonty Verwey WAS along for the trip and he was undoubtedly paid for out of one of the many rip-off pools of money available for such legal cheating – in this case, probably the generous mayoral allowance to allow her to have a personal advisor. The ‘Pie’s free character reading of Mr Verwey stands.

    • Mike Douglas says:

      Steve Belgian Gardens there is no photo of Jonte Verweys LinkedIn but he does say he is the Mayors advisor ..Austcham Korea linkedin post says he was with the Mayor when they met overseas . On Twitter there is a Jonte Verwey ( no mention job ) who constantly attacks the LNP . If the Twitter Jonte Verwey is the Mayors advisor is it Council policy for an employee who advises the Mayor to express his political alliance .

  10. Elusive Butterfly says:

    Ho Ho, Mr. Pie.
    Such a minor issue!
    The LNP’s commitment to solving indigenous problems in this State is appointing
    the Member for Surfers “fucking” Paradise as their spokesman.
    SP’s electorate population…60,000.
    Indigenous numbers…500.
    The Shadow Minister for the Olympics…guess who…has made another outstanding decision, shafting North QLD.

  11. Poopacker says:

    Great blog this one. First time reader. A mate recommended it. Bit confused about some nicknames around here it the rest of it makes sense. Been a local in the Ville for 20 years and had never heard of this webpage. Oh and yes, the mayor and her entourage are absolute fuckwits. Keep up the good work magpie.

    • The Magpie says:

      Thanks, Smelly. Since – paper and blog – the nicknames have been going for quite a while … 20 years next week … have been thinking of publishing a glossary of past and present nicknames … not sure how to stick it somewhere permanently (no obvious jokes please). Out-of-towners have occasionally said they drop off for that reason, but this is The Nest is for the interests of Townsville, anmd the humour is a great part of that.

      Thanks fo your comment and join in whenever you like on anything – well almost, Poopacker.

      • The Third Reader says:

        Twenty years. I well remember your phone call telling me of your plans for this new “blog” you were planning after leaving the paper. Have not missed one.

        • The Magpie says:

          And your constant support has always been appreciated, mate, as are the members of a small exclusive club of Nesters who have stuck around from day dot. The Magpie often refrains from using the word ‘readers’ because unlike the paper, this weekly missive has become an interactive site where everybody can have a say.

          The Magpie is also proud to say that in the 20 years (next week if memory serves) The ‘Pie hasn’t missed a weekend except for a couple of brief stints in hospital a few years ago.

  12. Regular reader says:

    That TEL media release boasting about the impact of the Nah campaign says it all about our $750,000 black hole.
    Is the TEL statistics queen actually saying that people in southern states, upon seeing or reading the Nah campaign, immediately applied for holidays, booked flights and accommodation and hastened to Townsville to get a gander at our world class tourist attractions?
    Would also be very interesting to find out just how the Nah campaign has been communicated to the southern masses. For example, what was the advertising spend, where did the ad appear, and how frequently?
    My guess is that it didn’t amount to much more than a modest online spend, unless Jenny Hill has wasted more of our money on this latest TEL embarrassment.

    • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

      While media is not my area of expertise (perhaps some of the lurking luvvies can help out) the TEL media release says “ an uplift in destination sentiment, website visitation, and awareness.” but does not say anything about bums on planes to Townsville. So people heard the advertising, turned on the website and said “yeah, nah, wtf?” and switched off before booking another weekend at the Goldie. There is a technical engineering term for this type of performance from the TELly tubbies “fucktards”.

      • The Magpie says:

        … or even more significantly, not a single stat on accommodation numbers. her gurgling unprovable lies of self-praise might fall over somewhat if any uptick – if there was one, which one doubts – was directly attributed to this Chernobyl of an ad campaign. And of course, the lies are unprovable because they will undoubtedly be the con artist’ and freeloaders catchcry, Commercial In Confidence.

        One of the prize pieces of flummery from Ms Woolfe was this when the hopeless campaign was launched.

        It is clear Ms Woolfe is way out of her depth. The Magpie has never denied one shining attribute of Little Patty Hot Lips O’Callaghan was the gift of the gab and her willingness to get in there with eyelids batting to drum up business on any front given to her. But even she lacked the vital spark of workable originality (going up in a helicopter with a cut-out of Prince Harry was just tomfoolery and a failure).

        In its current form of meaningless babble and unprovable claims of worth, TEL is a mini-scandal in itself, but with a total lack of independence and autonomy of operation – our failing mayor with talons sharpened is deputy chair of the board and ratepayers unwillingly are stiffed $750K annually for absolutely nothing – an alternative scheme manned by professional forward thinkers ain’t gunna happen anytime soon.

        RTo paraphrase Xavier Herbert, poor fella, my city.

  13. Prince Rollmop says:

    I have been wondering about how many complaints the Mullet has laid against Fran, and can we get access to the data? By comparison I would like to see if the Mullet has put in complaints against any other current Councillors also. Furthermore, when did the Mullet submit her first complaint against Fran, what was happening at the time or what preceded the first complaint and what is the nature of each complaint. I believe that if a Councillor or Mayor misuses or abuses the complaints process and it can be proven, the path to litigation should be available to the wronged Councillor. I guess proving that bullying or harassment is the root cause of the complaints being levelled against Fran would be hard to prove.

    • The Magpie says:

      Ask Tony Bligh, you can bet he gleefully engineered all of them.

      But there is a more serious aspect that goes well beyond a dopey conspiracy theory.

      So here we have the LGAQ, an organisation which boasts Mayor Mullet as a board member calling for what reforms to the very organisation that she makes such liberal and dishonest political use of. That being the case, coupled with the LGAQ’s track record in the area of protecting the dishonest (Hallam before the fall of several councillors: ‘the investigation into the Ipswich Council is a witch hunt.’), you may be sure she will do her damndest to make sure she is further shielded from external examination. And can bully authorities to favour her political use of the system.

    • Bogged Down by Jaundice says:

      Hmmm Rollmop, you one-eyed herring and TCC mole, I too have been wondering about OIA interactions but through a slightly different lens. I wonder how many complaints Cr O’Callaghan has laid against the mayor, the CEO and other councillors? When did Cr O’Callaghan submit her first complaint against the Mullet or anyone else? Are there genuine justifications for any complaints that may have been lodged? If so, have any been taken any further or has the OIA dismissed most if not all? Heaven forbid Cr O’Callaghan might have misused or abused the complaint process to “harass” councillors or members of staff in a way that warrants further investigation. Answering any of these questions would be difficult as RTIs on OIA complaints is very Kafkaesque but by golly it would interesting to know who is doing the “harassment” and directed at whom. Apparently the good councillor reads the Magpie blog…maybe for a little weekly reassurance. Perhaps in the interests of transparency she’d like to let us know. Just a number would be fine as anything more than that probably constitutes some breach of Councillor conduct.

      • The Magpie says:

        Indeed, wouldn’t it be good to know?

      • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

        This is a great idea and should be implemented all across Council to prove our transparency we could have a page on the website which lists all the complaints and the outcomes. Or is it only fun when it is one way traffic Mr Yellow.

        • Bogged down by Jaundice says:

          Do you actually read what you write you mostly uncivil fuckwit…anytime anyone posts a blog on this page that doesn’t excoriate the Mayor, the CEO or the Hill aligned councillors you mob go into a lather and flurry of insults and name calling as to their political alignment and proximity to the mayors anus….and then you have the temerity to accuse others of bias. Get a life you blathering cockwomble. And to your question….absolutely…bring on the list for everyone. Name and number of complaints lodged would suffice.

  14. NQ Gal says:

    Police Minister Mark Ryan is showing some serious incompetence regarding the fiasco with the forensics lab. Rather than picking up the phone to the police hierarchy back in November 2021 when the story was breaking in The Australian (and no doubt picked up by the Courier Mail), he claims he wasn’t aware of issues until he was formally briefed in June.

  15. Mugwump says:

    Hoot of the day!!!

    Aaron Harper believes people and organisations that don’t perform their roles adequately should be called out and criticised. Really, Aaron? This a blanket rule, mate?

    • The Magpie says:

      Thoughts and prayers from The Magpie, Aaron, chin up, little soldier, stop your sooking now.

    • Afterthought says:

      Townsville could do better if we had 3 local State MP,s who
      listened and represented their electorate and not there party.

    • The Magpie says:

      Are you listening to yourself, you complete tool?How galling to be told by a total incompetent that Townsville could do better. We will, Aaron we will, when we get some decent local members in to look after us. You’re a despicable, arrogant fool.

      • Mugwump says:

        It is sad state of affairs when a local politician talks down a business that operates and has employees and contractors local. Also offers a local service. It was the Qld State labor government that deregulated the industry allowing Uber, rideshare ect into the industry at the Taxi’s expense. It’s not a matter of no taxis in Townsville, it’s lack of drivers and when your a contractor with an ABN and having expenses all the sudden having new competition that is not on equal footing, no wonder so many left the industry.

        • Parson Blossomnose says:

          A massive black mark against any taxi company that doesn’t help Aaron Harper get out of our city.

          • Prickster says:

            Nice to see Aaron’s votes in Palaszczuk government from 2015 come back to bite him on the arse. Maybe Aaron will reflect on his taxi experiences when he votes for Palaszczuk government Energy Plan, when in a few years we have no power options and pay more for electricity.

    • Palm Sunday says:

      Harper could do us all a favour by accessing the taxi statistics collected quarterly by Transport and Main Roads and actually supplying some facts into the local debate. His government has the data, they know how many taxis are operating at what hours and what suburbs. Why do they collect data if they have no apparent use for it?

      • The Magpie says:

        The ‘Pie is not up with the cab situation overall in Townsville but he does have a question: is the fact that there care several companies operating here mean that there are different numbers to ring and book? If so, that is simply a crazy idea when you have a population our size in a service coverage area of huge physical dimensions.

        Sometimes there are reasonable reasons for monopolies in some areas (e.g Maggie Island ferry service, where competition might not be such a good thing in the long run … that’s a finite market). But for different reasons, either a cooperative set-up between companies or restrictions on the number of operators (with strict performance overview provisions) might serve us better. And while regulators are about, the Townsville airport taxi mess needs to be sorted out pronto. Dropping cab rank surcharges would be only a small start.

        • NQ Gal says:

          The day that Townsville Taxies sold out to 13cabs marked the start of the steep decline in services. Phone calls were directed to a Melbourne call centre and from day one there were problems.

          • Palm Sunday says:

            NQGal, be interested to know if actual taxi owners are troubled by these “problems” you say arose from the sale? Are there significantly less taxis overall now, are there many Uber cars in operation, has the whole ownership thing changed? Pretty complex picture I suspect.

        • Palm Sunday says:

          Maybe the data that TMR collects is (dreaded) commercial-in-confidence? Not sure if Uber-types have to supply the same data to government but if they do then all parties probably want not to reveal their secrets. Anyway, I will be surprised if anything is revealed by TMR. The whole cab industry has been shaken up Australia (nay world)-wide by the Uber thing and will probably never be the same (opaque, closed shop) again. Is it inexplicable why there are no late night taxis at the airport or is the financial disadvantage so obvious to insiders that they simply don’t bother – to turn up or explain?

    • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

      Surely there would be a guided chariot pulled by flights of angels to carry him to his rest and he would not have to reply on Taxies like mere voter do?

  16. The Magpie says:

    Gina Rinehart V Basketball Players

    The players can’t have it all their own way … but neither can Gina Rinehart. The Shovel sums it up brilliantly.

    • The Magpie says:

      Bit off topic, but The ‘Pie was channel surfing the sports area on the weekend and came across ….
      men’s netball!?!

      I mean, c’mon.

    • Jatzcrakers says:

      I don’t agree with The Shovels headline ‘Gina Rhinehart V Netball Australia.
      There’s no competition between these two at all. In my simplistic view, Gina is a Australia’s most successful business, (I’m not going to enter the argument of she should pay more taxes etc) she’s got lots and lots of money, Netball Australia has got fuck all money and plenty of debt and Gina was happy to give them sponsorship of $15M.

      N’ball Aust let the matter of discontent amongst a couple of players become a punch up and Gina says ‘fuck em’ we don’t need this, cheque cancelled’ !
      Gina R and her companies donate/sponser shitloads to other sports in Australia and mobs like The Shovel are always going to find a political angle to drive their agenda and they’re off target here on this matter !

      Like many of the minority groups in our world today who insist on trying to hold others to ransom and insist on demanding everyone else recognise their ‘rights’ and act accordingly, some members of N’ball Aust bit the hand that fed them and the hand said ‘no problem, game over’ !!
      Good on Gina I say !!!

      • The Magpie says:

        Have a bex and a cuppa, old mate, still that throbbing temple.
        This is an A grade media beat up about a B grade sport … and while common sense tells us the withdrawal was inevitable after you’ve been rightly or wrongly bad mouthed … the vital bit where you’ve meshed your cogs – you are missing humour. The Shovel is not a newspaper – sad to break it to you – and their headline suggesting Gina Rinehart has accused the netball gals of doing exactly what she wanted to do herself in inarguably, exactly and precisely right. Clever use of irony. And as for an agenda, The Shovel is exactly like – only miles better – than The Magpie, always looking for a laugh where possible to reinforce the absurdity of what is happening around us.

        You might note that The Shovel sticks it to Labor as much as anyone else and the absurd Greens cop a regular pasting but so does Dutton, King Chuckles and even the Republic has had a slipper to Jimmy and The Twins on occasion.

        And a postscript to the Gina-Bitchball row … the netballers lost The ‘Pie when they way overreached citing something Gina’s father, the long dead Lang Hancock said sometime early last century. If they had’ve stuck to some environmental climate change agenda, fine, whatever, but resorting to visiting the (since largely corrected) the sins of the father on the daughter is vindictive nonsense of the first degree.

        • Palm Sunday says:

          Magpie, referring specifically to your postscript about visiting the “(since largely corrected)” the sins of the father, I can’t remember Lang Hancock correcting anything he ever said, let alone anything he ever did, including mining asbestos. Sure, everything was legal and sure, governments were happy to collect royalties with one hand while they subsidised miners through diesel rebates with the other. Hancock had a particularly steadfast arrogance which he passed on in spades to his daughter. Here’s an example from the man himself:

          “Mining in Australia occupies less than one-fifth of one per cent of the total surface of our continent and yet it supports 14 million people. Nothing should be sacred from mining whether it’s your ground, my ground, the blackfellow’s ground or anybody else’s. So the question of Aboriginal land rights and things of this nature shouldn’t exist.”

          • The Magpie says:

            Well, that’s a point of view that is debatable naturally, but in a free country (let’s pretend), it can be said. But you choose to again concentrate on Hancock and have not offered any damning quotes from Rinehart … there surely must be many but The ‘Pie’s entire point is that none of these have been put forward to support the sponsorship rejection. Let’s have a few from the daughter, if you please.

          • Palm Sunday says:

            I chose to “concentrate” on old Lang because you had suggested his sins had been largely corrected – although by whom is still a mystery. On the other hand Gina Rinehart is, of course, without sin. She is a model of motherhood (see court depositions from her children) and a philanthropist of the highest moral calibre, giving millions of dollars to the iconic, transparent IPA and, when possible, to shining lights of political integrity like Barnaby Joyce. She has boasted, within the bounds of her natural modesty, that she once helped to convince students at her swanky old school in Perth that climate change was not human-induced, by organising a talk at the school by climate skeptic Lord Christopher Monckton and Prof Ian Plimer. None of this has anything to do though, with Mrs Rinehart’s on again – off again sponsorship of sport because she would never want to push a message. Never.

          • The Magpie says:

            A very selective overview, much of which depends on which end of the argument you are on. You are on the end which has decided certain arguments are right and not open to debate, therefore ‘cancelling’ is the only principled road to take.

            But my basic points still stands … using your points to (idiotically, but still …) argue against the sponsorship is at least relevant, but whatever her father said is totally irrelevant. Unless of course your Christ-like hand decrees otherwise.

          • Palm Sunday says:

            Magpie, it’s your Christ-like hand on the ‘delete’ button – just like Gina’s.

          • The Magpie says:

            You bet … keep that in mind.

        • Steve, Belgian Gardens says:

          “Early last century”

          • The Magpie says:


          • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

            The luvvies are really stirred up about this. Big business has obviously forgotten that they are required to roll over and think of Coal Mines while the woke warriors have their way with them. The threat of being cancelled only works when you are a bout what these thin skinned parasites think.

          • Prince Rollmop says:

            Lang Hancock was one of a number of people involved in the early development of the Wittenoom asbestos mining site. He sold his interest to the CSR subsidiary, Australian Blue Asbestos Pty Ltd in 1943. As usual, Governments never demand enough remediation money. Fuckwits in Government allow mines to operate and then also allow these mining magnates to leave a clusterfuck behind. Everyone blames each other but at the end of the day the environment, humans and animals are made to suffer and pay the price.. Would be nice to see Gina’s company pay the needed billions for the Wittenoom cleanup, but that is just a dream.

          • Palm Sunday says:

            Prince, the fact is many mining and refining projects won’t get off the ground in the first place unless governments lean way over for them. Adani is a perfect example from the here and now, Queensland Nickel at Yabulu a case from the not-so-distant past. In one way or another the electorate wants this, demands it and expects it to continue. Townsville people (not necessarily the ones who demanded a stadium) fell over themselves calling on state and federal government to support Clive Palmer’s mendacious attempts to reopen his nickel refinery “for the employment”, seemingly regardless of any rational consideration of the financial, political, environmental or social implications. Hells Gate dam will come up again, whether the numbers stack up or not. We have just voted out a government that rorted like we’ve never seen before. If there are any “fuckwits” involved we really should begin by looking amongst ourselves. We knowingly elect them after all.

          • Steve, Belgian Gardens says:


          • The Magpie says:

            Updated. So your argument is about the word ‘early’, and you obviously spent some hours researching it … you really have Magpie Derangement Syndrome, don’t you, Steve?
            Or maybe it’s just something about the name Malcolm.

  17. Prince Rollmop says:

    The taxi situation in Townsville has been shithouse for at least the past 20 years. It’s nothing new. It is funny though when a protected and spoilt species like a politician becomes inconvenienced by our shit taxi network. Poor old Cabcharge Harpic.

    • Palm Sunday says:

      Prince, Townsville apparently has 130+ licenced cabs. Many cab drivers spend quite a bit of time with their heads buried in the TBully or their phones and are keen to impress hapless customers with their knowledge of and opinions about innumerable subjects, especially Townsville’s sore points. So it is surprising that a cabbie hasn’t turned up anonymously at the ‘Nest with an explanation about the cab service at the airport. Surely this is an opportunity for society’s most opinionated to cut loose? Come on cabbies, air your scungy laundry.

      • The Magpie says:

        Thanks for the thought, bumhole … as if The ‘Pie doesn’ have to handle enough ‘scungy laundry’ curating comments.

        But re the cabbies … have got some good curry recipes though.

        • NQ Gal says:

          There might be 130+ taxi licenses in Townsville, but if you don’t have at least double that amount of drivers, all you have is a fleet of parked cars.

          • The Magpie says:

            Good point … in larger cities at least three drivers are needed for each cab to make it viable because of busy hours that are for longer periods.

          • Palm Sunday says:

            NQGal, the original point made by the Prince was that it has been this way for at least the past 20 years. So, do owners not pay drivers enough to attract them into the business? Or are there too many licenced taxis, even before Uber came along? And does Uber come to the airport or are they missing in action? Something is amiss in the business model. I was hoping an actual owner/driver would contribute some info.

  18. Dave of Kelso says:

    But Aaron, Townsville is doing better. Townsville has become a measuring stick to be used by other cities/towns.

    Some time back (sorry, no link) Mackay local newspaper, or was it social media, reporting on indigenous youth crime, stated, “Mackay does not want to become another Townsville. ”

    How about that Aaron, Townsville has done so well that it is now a national benchmark, for which only you and the Puddleduck with your fucked youth justice scheme can take credit.

    So recently no taxi. When your car is stolen, after they have been right through your house you are going to need a taxi. Good luck with that!

  19. Mike Douglas says:

    At last Mayor Hill fires up on the 11 stolen cars Channel 7 local news last night ” enough is enough , either move these families out to more isolated areas or break up the crime gangs ” . It’s back to you Aaron , Scott , Les either protect your electorate or your party .

  20. Average victim says:

    What did we do to deserve drones Harper, Stewart and Walker, Bogan Jenny Hill, Frothy Molachino, Gushing Greaney, the gutless editor of the local paper, the taxi shambles out at Townsville Airport, and the clueless mob down at Townsville Enterprise? Surely Townsville must be cursed.

  21. The Magpie says:


    Media Griffith
    Good morning journalists and editors,

    Griffith University and Swiss-based company LimmaTech Biologics AG have signed a landmark deal to develop a world-first gonorrhoea vaccine.

    Researchers from Griffith’s Institute for Glycomics have discovered vaccine antigens that show great promise and could potentially changes the lives of millions of people.

    Question: Penicillin no good anymore? Someone better tell the army.

    In Townsville, the clap has always been known as The Mad Cow Disease, although The Exchange would be just as appropriate.

    Off point but The ‘Pie always loved Dame Nellie Melba’s story of once being introduced to a Sydney audience by an MC who said, “Ladies and gentlemen, Dame Nellie Melba – c’mon, give her the clap she so richly deserves.’

  22. The Magpie says:

    Ho Hum, just another like yesterday on Townsville roads.

    10am today. Stolen black car cleans up the two white ones (how symbolic) and damages traffic lights, corner Ross River Road and Cross Street. Four/five youths – all looking very young – scatter and run off from the black car.

  23. The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

    FYI, today’s Wanker Street thought bubble is

    Townsville City Council is committed to providing opportunities for businesses, community groups, innovators, and entrepreneurs, to develop new projects and ideas that encourage visitation to our region and ignite the city.

    Townsville is the primary services and commercial hub for North Queensland, contributing more than $13 billion annually to the region’s economy.

    The City Activation and Jobs Growth Policy has been created to assist in generating investment and creating employment opportunities for the city.

    Applications for Component 1: New and Repurposed Development are now open!

    Council is offering to waive charges for eligible projects to promote high-value development in the prescribed Townsville City Core and Fringe areas and Medium Density Residential properties throughout the Townsville Local Government Area.

    The maximum value of fee waivers for eligible projects is the lessor of the assessed Council charges or up to $500,000 per project, including:
    ▪️ Infrastructure charges
    ▪️ Operational Works
    ▪️ Compliance Assessment
    ▪️ Hydraulic Services, water meter and service connections
    ▪️ Road and footpath closures
    ▪️ A dedicated TCC Development Advocate

    • Prince Rollmop says:

      They better tell any interested parties that they will be dealing with an incompetent council and a nasty, spiteful, vindictive Mayor who will cut you off at the knees if you don’t pay homage and bow down to the sacred purple doona. After all, this is Townsville.

    • Palm Sunday says:

      Hey Engineer, would “prescribed Townsville City Core and Fringe areas” describe the North Yards railway land along Flinders Street west? Perhaps this thought bubble is a way through the maze of obstacles that seem to complicate that site – although not sure if a redevelopment there would “encourage visitation to our region and ignite the city”.

      • The Magpie says:

        ‘Ignite the city’? Then at least we could start from scratch again.

      • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

        Fucked if I know Weekend Wanker. I don’t write this shit I just got it off the internal email. Ask Jenny when next you are spooning with her.

        • Palm Sunday says:

          Ooo, so sensitive. I wouldn’t expect any councillor or mayor to have a clue about any of the fee ‘waivers’ being offered here but presumably some of the so-called professionals in Walker Street have a pulse and would know something. Maybe not?

          • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

            My hand is certainly not on the pulse of anything and I doubt if anyone working here has any more idea. If you think that’s sensitive, you should stick your head in the door of the Herbert some afternoon and introduce yourself, then you can experience our brand of sensitivity for yourself.

          • Hands Up says:

            So, if I wandered into the Herbert each afternoon, ostensibly to see me old mate Paul Venturato, and called out your pseudonym loudly and asked for an audience, would you, assuming you’re there, step forward? If the answer to that is yes then I’m game. I’d love to know who the person is who’s so unhinged in his contempt for this council yet so willing to keep collecting a paycheque…one that I’m paying for with my rates.

          • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

            Hands Up (yourself) you wish buddy. Why give the Mullet a free kick to sack me you sad little sack.

          • The Magpie says:

            Now The ‘Pie will bet Jonty has started a cyber search. Head down, mate.

        • Palm Sunday says:

          To the Herbert for professional information? Yeah, nah. Sooner talk to a Townsville cabbie.

  24. Regular reader says:

    What’s with Jim Chalmers having his wife and children on the floor of parliament last night to congratulate him after his budget speech, like champion golfers do at the US Open? Someone should remind him that he’s an amateur who does nothing but give daily warnings, and blame the previous government for everything. What happened to the plan he and Albo said they had during the election campaign to reduce the cost of living? Tipped this bloke to be the worst treasurer Australia has ever had and he’s well on his way.

    • The Magpie says:

      Christ almighty, ‘rush to judgement’ doesn’t even start to cover that premature ejaculation, RR. The ‘Pie has no idea why you have got yourself in a lather about his family being around, the old bird is mystified by your outline of a Treasurer’s role in the scheme of things, ditto that you seem to think that it is a flaw of judgement to justifiably blame the previous nine years of mis-government for much of our current fiscal mess. And you disqualify yourself as a serious commentator on political matters with that Year 6 drivel about reducing the cost of living. What, overnight? After a few months in office?

      And since you want to play political poker, I’ll see your tip about ‘worst treasurer’ and raise you that Chalmers shows all the hallmarks as a future Prime Minister, and sooner rather than later than the Liberal fucktards who can’t even find a palatable leader in opposition.

  25. Cantankerous but happy says:

    Palm Sunday and all your other names you use, do you have a go fund me page that we can donate to so you can go buy yourself a life you pathetic sad fuck, every week the comments section is just endless drivel from you, I used to enjoy the comments each week and the back and forth between everyone but can’t even be bothered sifting through them anymore and try to avoid your garbage, get a life.

  26. Prince Rollmop says:

    Australia’s national debt was $300b in 2012. Today it’s almost $1 trillion. The Turdball/Abbott/Morrison decade has been absolutely woeful. It would take an essay to describe the “how’s and why’s”, but suffice to say the lunatics have been in charge of the asylum. Jugears Chalmers has inherited a fucking mess and it’s going to take decades for Australia’s economy to fully recover, if ever. The global pandemic combined with the Ukraine war and a declining world economy that has been slowly collapsing for several years now is going to be painful for all and sundry. Chalmers isn’t stupid. He has read the tea leaves and he knows the shitfight what is just around the corner. It’s been almost 50 years since a change in global currency and we are almost at the end of the current cycle. I’m afraid that Interest rates and inflation are only going to keep rising due to the ineptitude of modern Governments and the false belief that you can just rig the markets and keep dumping printed money into the system. Do you hear that global economic clocking ticking? Not long until midnight.

  27. Prickster says:

    No Fran at the Council meeting today?

  28. The Magpie says:

    What the fuck is Justice Lucy McCallum thinking? What in her mind is required for ‘beyond reasonable doubt’?

    She is openly inviting, indeed bullying the jury in the Bruce Lehrmann trial to return an increasingly unsafe verdict -either way.

    Let’s go back to her instructions to the jury when they first retired.

    “You should find a verdict according to the evidence presented in the courtroom and said you should not feel pressured to make a decision.There’s no rush. There’s no time limit,” she said.

    ‘… not feel pressure to make a decision’ was clearly aimed at media commentary, social media ignorance, and personal family views. But she apparently didn’t think that her dictum of pressure applied to herself. Which is now does.

    On numerous occasions, the jury has insisted they cannot reach a unanimous verdict, and each time, they’ve been told to back and try again. Try what again? Change of mind in what anyway is simply an opinion, because there’s fuck all facts ‘to the evidence presented in the courtroom’ on which to base a judgement.?

    The very real danger in this trial and deliberations are that there is absolutely no forensic evidence, and very few actual facts to go on, blurred timelines, erratic and questionable behaviour post facto behaviour by both the accused and his accuser, and a very dangerous political dimension hovering over it all in the background.… The ‘Pie reckons there was a good case to have the matter dismissed when all this became apparent.

    So a man’s future and freedom, and a woman’s credibility and integrity will now have to, at the insistence of McCallum, boil down to a matter of opinion. And thanks to this disrespectful attitude from the judge, any verdict becomes more unsafe by the minute, now entrusted as it to a group who is clearly fed up with the task of trying to guess who’s telling the truth and who isn’t. Many of them have undoubtedly already decided that it is an impossible task. But what does this arrogant judge do? Increase the pressure in the hope someone says ‘Ah what the fuck, OK, guilty (or not guilty)’.

    Surely ANY verdict is now going to eminently appealable as unsafe, and justice seen to be done for anyone now seems a forlorn hope.

    No wonder the ACT is considered the also ran in the state and territory jurisprudence arena.

  29. The Real Fransparency says:

    It appears Cr O’Callaghan WAS NOT at the full Council Meeting today and was not able to vote against the Stable on the Strand. May her flight back into the country was delayed? I wonder if she’ll be reviewing the livestream of the meeting and posting the usual inane and feckless comments on her FB page

    • The Magpie says:

      Hi, Jonty, thanks for the info. I may have missed it, but where can I find Clr O’Callaghan would vote against Stable oin the Strand? Or are you making things for the mayor? Aagin?

      • The Real Fransparency says:

        Cr O’Callaghan has a stated policy of voting against any council grants in excess of $5000 and you. Mine was an observation only, that in her absence she was not able to exercise that vote in line with her stated policy.

      • Palm Sunday says:

        A ‘Jonty’ sounds like some kind of sexually transmitted disease.

        • Palm Sunday says:

          Magpie, I expect it is tiresome to hear this but the “Palm Sunday” who wrote the Jonty comment at 7.24pm is not this one.

          • The Magpie says:

            Sorry, what comment are you referring to?

          • The Magpie says:

            Palm Sunday, still waiting for your reply: what comment are you referring to?

            Let’s see if you can weasel out of this fuck up, mate.

          • Palm Sunday says:

            Seriously Magpie, here is a copy/paste of the comments column from yesterday:

            The Magpie October 26, 2022 at 5:29 pm
            Hi, Jonty, thanks for the info. I may have missed it, but where can I find Clr O’Callaghan would vote against Stable oin the Strand? Or are you making things for the mayor? Aagin?

            The Real Fransparency October 26, 2022 at 5:45 pm
            Cr O’Callaghan has a stated policy of voting against any council grants in excess of $5000 and you. Mine was an observation only, that in her absence she was not able to exercise that vote in line with her stated policy.

            Palm Sunday Your comment is awaiting moderation.
            October 26, 2022 at 7:24 pm
            A ‘Jonty’ sounds like some kind of sexually transmitted disease.

            Palm Sunday October 26, 2022 at 7:42 pm
            Magpie, I expect it is tiresome to hear this but the “Palm Sunday” who wrote the Jonty comment at 7.24pm is not this one.

            The Magpie October 26, 2022 at 9:40 pm
            Sorry, what comment are you referring to?

            The Magpie October 27, 2022 at 10:07 am
            Palm Sunday, still waiting for your reply: what comment are you referring to?

            Let’s see if you can weasel out of this fuck up, mate.

          • The Magpie says:

            Hahahah … nice try but … and there is a very serious question in here.
            Now let’s see.
            The Magpie’s possibly imperfect understanding of the way this works that no one except The ‘Pie can see comments that have not been approved (moderated) before being published by him.
            so in order of arrival:
            Palm Sunday Your comment is awaiting moderation.
            October 26, 2022 at 7:24 pm
            A ‘Jonty’ sounds like some kind of sexually transmitted disease.

            Palm Sunday October 26, 2022 at 7:42 pm
            Magpie, I expect it is tiresome to hear this but the “Palm Sunday” who wrote the Jonty comment at 7.24pm is not this one.

            Note thse quoted times are the time the com ets were submitted, not published. Last night, The ‘Pie watched TV from 6pm to 9.30pm, and when he returned to the screen, he found both these comments unpublished, and awaiting moderation, therefore unknown to readers. So a problem was immediately apparent – how would you know that someone had posted a comment in your name if it hadn’t been published – unless it really was you try to walk back from the comment. So The ‘Pie published your denial of having posted the Jonty comment, and asked for you to point it out what you were referring to, but still DID NOT publish the post you complained of. AND STILL HASN’T … or have I missed something, can you help me locate it?

            And your attempt at deception is further complicated by the fact that you actually have a copy of the unpublished Jonty comment … where could you have got that from if you were not the original author? Or do I misunderstand how this WordPress site works? And if the Nest comments have been hacked, what a fucking waste of time for no purpose.

            The ‘Pie’s best guess …. you suddenly panicked realising that even someone with rudimentary knowledge might trace the originating computer back to at least a Walker Street location … and that would you are posting inappropriate material from an official machine.

            Bottom line: how can you read unpublished comments if you didn’t make them in the first place? The comment is still awaiting moderation and certainly hasn’t been published by me.

            ‘At leas even Steve from Belligerent Gardens has the nouse not to make denials of comments and completely false allegations of fakery until AFTER they’ve been published.

          • Prince Rollmop says:

            This is a great blog being fucked up by the idiot Palm Sunday. Sounds like old Palm is a schizophrenic talking (or commenting) to itself for the sole purpose of wasting the Magpies time PLUS causing a distraction from what this blog is predominately about which is local Townsville issues (and other stuff thrown in for good measure). You’re a moron Sunday.

          • The Magpie says:

            If you read the PS’s explanation about the comments (The ‘Pie’s suspicions were unfounded), you will get the bad news that there are two morons out there, not just the one. Ah, well ….

          • Nerd says:

            just check the IP address that the comments came from – easy

          • The Magpie says:

            And just to be certain, can you or any other commenter confirm that when they submit a comment, they get the bounce-back notification as described?

          • NQ Gal says:

            I’ve never received one.

          • The Magpie says:

            OK, thanks. Over to you, Palm Sunday, how come you received one – a claim which appears to be valid?

          • Mike Douglas says:

            Pie , never received a bounce back email when commenting . Palm Sunday seems to be a disrupter trying to discredit this blog by providing uncertainty as well as unresearched statements to distract and frustrate commentators .

          • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

            never, and I use work computer, home computer and phone. the draft messages show up across all these devices but I have never received a confirmation message

          • Palm Sunday says:

            Magpie, believe it or not you just have to accept that what you see is what I got. You say ” Or do I misunderstand how this WordPress site works?” Well, with respect, that might be correct and so I am offering a different interpretation which is: When you receive a comment from a “Palm Sunday” your computer automatically sends a message back to all the Palm Sundays it knows about, telling them that the comment they just sent has been received and is awaiting moderation. When I opened my Magpies Nest yesterday evening about 7.35 I had that exact message ON MY COMPUTER telling me that Palm Sunday’s message was awaiting moderation. I had not sent anything. I just happened to open my computer about 10 minutes after some other “Palm Sunday” somewhere had sent in that Jonty comment.

          • The Magpie says:

            OK, accept that it was from someone else, thanks to comment from Nerd … a check of the IPs shows different origins. And I certainly didn’t know about the automatic advice, because I don’t post comments for submission, they just go straight in.

            And it may sort out our long standing problem with pinched monikers … The ‘Pie will check the IPs and might even make a list, but if too many people want to play laughing homosexuals, he’ll forget the whole thing and just ignore complaints.

          • The Magpie says:

            But there is another point there that The ‘Pie is wondering about. Are you saying that The Nest software actually associates printed names with IP addresses to notify that a comment has been received. Klutz though he is, The Magpie imagined the notification would’ve been simply pinged back to the originating IP address. Can’t see how the computer would associate text names with multiple – indeed any IP addresses. What’s the go, Nerd? Anybody?

            And for you folks this might seem a storm in a teacup, but it may change the way The ‘Pie can police the arseoles who raid other people’s names.

          • Nerd says:

            I doubt that the nest software will correlate the IP address with the typed username, but I don’t know what software you are using.

            Oh and it is quite easy to change IP addresses. Most non-commercial users get whatever their ISP allocates them when they connect.

            To change the IP can simply be a matter of disconnecting from the internet and reconnecting.
            The new IP will be within a specific range allocated to the ISP, sometimes it doesn’t change, depending on the ISP.

            There are other ways to change IP addresses like using a VPN with a rotating IP address – mine changes every 15 minutes.

          • The Magpie says:

            Valuable info, thanks, which also makes Weekly Wanker even more suspect and The ‘Pie’s announced new policy further justified.

          • Palm Sunday says:

            NQGal, are you saying that when you click on ‘Submit Comment’, the comment is immediately presented unadorned on the website? Or do you, like me, see the comment go up with a statement in italics beneath saying “Your comment is awaiting moderation”? No one else (except the Magpie) can see your posted comment until it has been ‘moderated’, which could be hours away.

          • The Magpie says:

            Which means no one but the IP sender can see the message. Have come to the conclusion that this issue has wasted enough of our time now, this thread is ended and future stuff from you will be treated solely on its merits … if it doesn’t reach the Nest’s required standards, it will simply be deleted and as the ads in the old newspapers used to say at the bottom of competitions ‘the judge’s decision is final and no correspondence will be entered into’.

          • Prince Rollmop says:

            Here here!! Well said. And after all Magpie, it is YOUR blog and you don’t need to answer to idiots like Sunday Wanker, not do you have to publish, respond or engage with the idiot.

          • The Magpie says:

            Well, to quote Evelyn Waugh ‘Up to a point, Lord Copper’.

            The Nest is set up for both humorous and informed debate and in this prissy world of pressed together thighs, robust (read rude) exchanges have been tolerated, so everyone can know who the enemy is. But given that The Magpie spends upwards of of 55 hours a week on blog related matters, the time-wasters, the tedious and the trolls are becoming more and more prevalent and less and less welcome. So blatant misinformation and inarguable tripe (hi to Tropical, under your rock) are too time wasting to be entertained any longer, but argued disagreement with each other or with The ‘Pie is still encouraged. But note the word ‘argued': comments of out and out personal abuse with no real reference to an issue will now be automatically deleted. Practitioners will always have FB for that.

            And please do not bother claiming stolen names or faked comments … suck it up. The ‘Pie will keep an eye on IP IDs, but he’s not going to be a policeman … it’s more time efficient here in The Nest to be a dictator,heh heh heh.

          • Eva says:

            Jawohl Herr Brooks!

          • The Magpie says:

            Good girl, that’s the attitude.

        • The Magpie says:

          Good on him, about time he had a win. Taylor’s been hammered by judges for dodgy behaviour on at least three occasions, has had return several million dollars to a rorted client, and has enjoyed two spectacular losses to The Magpie’s brilliant legal team, after Taylor had inveigled that goose Rabieh Krayem to sue The Magpie on the flimsiest of grounds and went down faster than a priest at the Choirboys Picnic (the fact Gleeson totally inept missus – a solicitor for Taylor – handled the matter was a of great assistance to our team. There is no question that Taylor was an active urger for Gleeson to ‘tip of’ Sharri Markson in the Australian with misinformation about The ‘Pie that ended up costing News Ltd around one million dollars in costs and damages.

          So giddy up Bazza, going to need a few more Gold Passes before you recoup that lot.

  30. Regular reader says:

    Happy to be corrected Pie.
    So when was the last time, if ever, the family of a federal treasurer appeared on the floor of parliament to celebrate the presentation of a budget?
    Also happy to be corrected if this show pony treasurer ever details his “plan” to reduce the cost of living.

  31. Achilles says:

    According to a (behind paywall) article in The Oz, the Hell’s Gate dam project has been shelved, read canned by The Treasurer.

    Be interesting to see how fast the funds allocation heads South for Puddleduck’s Olympics budget.

    • The Magpie says:

      It was all absolute bullshit start to finish, from Scummo to Albo, it was never a goer at that price tag at this time. And boy, are TEL in trouble now, the Dudley Do Nothings budget has been shredded.

  32. Regular reader says:

    The dark empire fights back.
    It appears that the forces that have turned Townsville into Crimesville, and in the case of Townsville Enterprise, Crownsville, have resorted to counter spin to try to undermine the pushback from Magpie bloggers.
    Nice try Jenny/Dolan, but no cigar.

  33. Mike Douglas says:

    Mayor Hill believes Superfunds will be interested in funding the North Rail yards into affordable accommodation with Council . A review of Walker streets property decisions . Sold Thuringowa Council building to a investor who cleaned it up , leased it and made millions on the sale . Bought a vacant cbd property , demolished it , rebuilt it and its vacant costing ? . $3 mil blow out on a $5.5 mil library relocation . How many other Council projects blown out or delayed . Affordable living means lower returns unless the State / Council / Feds cover the shortfall .

  34. The Magpie says:

    The jury in the Bruce Lehrmann rape trial has been discharged with no verdict recorded, after one juror admitted accessing evidence that was not presented in court.

    And what a blow FOR (i.e in favour of) justice that was, the situation had reached the intolerable stage of a verdict based on ‘a feeling in your water’ unfairness, not evidence, because there was none, including no real circumstantial matter.

    Chief Justice Lucy McCallum will circle the wagons of arcane legal excuses, but frankly, The Magpie sincerely believes she’s fucked up this stupendously expensive trial in her repeated insistence – at least eight times when told they couldn’t agree – that the some juror’s should change their opinion on the scant evidence … and it would only have been flimsily based opinion. And that was evidence that could damn either way.

    What a fucking shambles of misdirection and arrogance.

    Lucy McCallum should be counselled, and not allowed anywhere near the inevitable retrial, set down for February 20 next year.

    • The Magpie says:

      Idle thought: wonder if the juror, no doubt exasperated by the judges patronisation, may have deliberately accessed the illicit information and then let it be known one way or the other that he had? He may have considered the possible penalty worth a well deserved ‘fuck you’ to Justice McCallum.

      But one thing is for sure … if Lucy McCallum decides the penalty for him, he’ll get no justice, just the full impact of the law.

      • Palm Sunday says:

        Magpie, trials aborted because juries could not agree on a verdict are not unknown and the next legal move cannot be predicted:

        From Wikipedia: “In 1991 Bjelke-Petersen faced criminal trial for perjury arising out of the evidence he had given to the Fitzgerald inquiry (an earlier proposed charge of corruption was incorporated into the perjury charge). Bjelke-Petersen’s former police Special Branch bodyguard Sergeant Bob Carter told the court that in 1986 he had twice been given packages of cash totalling $210,000 at the premier’s office. He was told to take them to a Brisbane city law firm and then watch as the money was deposited in a company bank account.[citation needed] The money had been given over by developer Sng Swee Lee, and the bank account was in the name of Kaldeal, operated by Sir Edward Lyons, a trustee of the National Party.[71] John Huey, a Fitzgerald Inquiry investigator, later told Four Corners: “I said to Robert Sng, ‘Well what did Sir Joh say to you when you gave him this large sum of money?’ And he said, “All he said was, ‘thank you, thank you, thank you’.”[72] The jury could not agree on a verdict. In 1992 it was revealed that the jury foreman, Luke Shaw, was a member of the Young Nationals and was identified with the “Friends of Joh” movement. A special prosecutor announced in 1992 there would be no retrial because Bjelke-Petersen, then aged 81, was too old. Developer Sng Swee Lee refused to return from Singapore for a retrial. Bjelke-Petersen said his defence costs sent him broke.[73]”

        • The Magpie says:

          And your point is?

          But The ‘Pie thanks you for interesting cut and paste, and patronising insight into the judicial system. But the relevance is a bit hazy … but let’s have ago at the crystal for the next legal move … oh, wait, it’s already happened … Lehrmann retrial set down for February 20.

          • Juicy Lucy says:

            Apparently it was a document located by a court official that contained research into the prevalence of false rape claims.

            I’d say it didn’t meet the preconceived outcome of the judge and so she dismissed them to try again

          • The Magpie says:

            It may not have (but doubt your suggestion), but McCallum had no choice anyway, because of the hard and fast rule that decisions can only be made on matters put before the court. When that rule is breached, aborting the trial is the only option. Interesting though that the subject mater gave a clue to the core argument among jurors. Classic he said, she said.

        • Happy clapper says:

          Sunday Wanker would know all about crooked politicians and brown paper bags filled with cash. That’s how the local crooked businesses get rich – paying off local, state and federal members. Now, I’m not saying that such shenanigans would ever take place in Townsville, but if it were to take place, good ol Sunday Wanker would be in the middle of it.

          • The Magpie says:

            The ‘Pie just lerrves all the evidence based comments between unknowns here in The Nest.

          • Achilles says:

            Happy STD, probably the only reason it may not happen in Townsville, is that TCC is broke,
            They couldn’t afford the cost of a brown paper bag with which to put the folding gold into.

        • Grumpy says:

          Sabbath – are you even paying attention? The jury was not discharged because they couldn’t reach a verdict.

          • Palm Sunday says:

            Grumpy, earlier in this discussion the Magpie asked, ” . . . can a jury actually come back and tell the judge they can’t reach a [unanimous] verdict and they will not continue? In essence, quit?” The Bjelke-Petersen example given is a case that actually did this. That’s all. No ulterior motive, no conspiracy.

          • The Magpie says:

            My dear Weekend Wanker, The ‘Pie inter alia is rapidly becoming aware that you’re not really too bright? The juiry in the Joh case, DID NOT even remotely do this … when a jury cannot agree, it is solely to to the judge to decide whether they should make further efforts or discharge them.

            the Joh matter you pasted does not in any way indicate that they refused to continue deliberations, which was the ‘Pie’s question. (Subsequent inquiries appear that there is no such option for juries, or they could be held in contempt. That why The ‘Pie has suggested the rogue juror may have deliberately nobbled the Lehrmann proceedings.)

            Pay closer attention.

      • NQ Gal says:

        Brittany Higgins doesn’t appear to have done herself any favours, giving a teary speech outside the court, after the judged expressly warned all parties about making comments that could prejudice the retrial.

        • The Magpie says:

          What a fucking idiot!!

          No not Higgins, very understandable, emotionally overloaded, but where was her $10,000 a day legal brief, telling her to shut up and say nothing, not a word. Something a legal aid hack would’ve ensured happened. There’s every chance this has now rooted her in any retrial … or even if it now gets to that. And contempt of court charges against her could be well within range by suggesting the trial was conducted unfairly, although this cowardly ACT judiciary circus is unlikely to go down that path that for fear that the clitterati will come after them.


          • Amanda Reen says:

            Pie, the more cynical amongst us might suggest that Ms Higgins teary speech was a well orchestrated play on her part. There is no way that she would want to go through another grilling like she did. Blind Freddy can see that the paucity of evidence against the accused was at best going to result in another hung jury. This way, she gets her say, the trial gets a permanent stay (much to the relief of the ACT DPP) and she gets to preach about the unfairness of how victims gets treated by the system. She can only hope that the rest of the world forgets about the way her story was ripped to shreds by Defence Council, You can bet your left one that the Chief Justice will talk a massive game and say she has been a bad girl and let her off. Higgins is just gaming the system and she and her lawyers are playing the percentages.

          • The Magpie says:

            A fairly popular view, but should any retrial go to a new judge, there is a certainty among The ‘Pie’s legal chums that a renewed request for no trial be allowed because of the then Prime Minister Scott Morrison’s public apology to Ms Higgins for her ‘rape’ in national parliament, which means national media. The general view is that this aborted trial should never have been allowed to proceed for that very reason, but Lucy McCallum appeared to have some very non-judicial agendas. But the guys and gals in her position are a protected species … because these folks make up their own rules to suit.

  35. The Magpie says:

    The Magpie is going off screen for as while, but will post further comments this arvo.

  36. The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

    Wow Magpie you with a little help from your nestlings have really fired up the luvvies this week. There is an amazing amount of time and effort and bluster being poured into the nest this week. A bit like a wartime partisan you are doing your bit to derail the Mullet’s ambitions by diverting her resources from anything else than fighting the fires you keep lighting. Keep up the great work comrade.

    • The Magpie says:

      Your comment, which is perhaps over-egging the cake somewhat – was appreciated up until the very last word.

      • The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

        Sorry. Certainly not meant in a political sense but more as from a fellow fighter in the trenches.

        • The Magpie says:

          The ‘Pie hasn’t worked out how to add emojis to his comments, (imagine laughing emoji) so don’t take it amiss … The ‘Pie being called comrade is amusing enough when he is more often characterised as being somewhere to the right Genghis Khan.

  37. Russell says:

    I have never received a bounce-back, Pie.

  38. Achilles says:

    Truth in advertising? “Dan might be a prick, but he’s a prick who’s delivering for construction workers,” the poster reads.


  39. Regular reader says:

    I think Palm Sunday is just wasting your time Pie.
    Give him the flick.

  40. Elusive Butterfly says:

    If you remember Mr. Pie, the same thing happened to me about using that horrible “fuck” word in your intro this week.

  41. Jatzcrakers says:

    Pie, back to the aborted Canberra trial….My suspicious mind quickly had the same thought as you re did old mate juror use the illegal paperwork to terminate the trial and give the finger to the judge ?
    A question for other Nesters in legal circles…Should the accused be exonerated and found not guilty, does he have any avenue open to him to take action against his accuser ?
    I’m uncertain if he’s been able to work since the start of this matter and suspect his future employment opportunities will be restricted.

    • The Magpie says:

      The following from my imperfect knowledge of these matters.

      Even if the prosecution drops the case – as in should in light of the Prime Minister’s ‘rape apology’ statement to the House – Lehrmann may in the public’s eye be ‘exonerated’, but not in fact. There a many reasons why court matters do not advance to the stage of proof by jury, and there are many and varied reasons why both coppers and prosecution drop charges, but beyond a massive investigative cock-up, dismissal is no proof of innocence, often just absence of enough evidence to prove ‘beyond reasonable doubt’.

      And Christ, the thought of Lehrmann trying to sue Higgins is ludicrous – the boot might be on the other foot, but on backwards. The required proof of intent, let alone ‘malicious intent’ would be tenfold times harder for Lehrmann to prove against Higgins, and besides, the cost of such an action, even in the unlikely event that a court would allow such an action to be brought, it would be ruinous to both parties and a pointless exercise.

      The best outcome now is for the matter to be dropped, because any future verdict – either way – will be unavoidable tainted and a black mark against the judicial system … and especially the arrogant and incompetent ditz of a judge.

      If that comes to pass, the hissing and spitting won’t just be rampant at the next meeting of the Lisa Wilkinson Lunch For The Feminist’s Rules Of Evidence Club.

  42. The (barely) Civil Engineer says:

    Young Shari from the Bullsheet must have written her column today tongue in cheek as she maintains that sponsorship and money do not buy silence or approval. What the hell does News Corpse do day after day with its media power?

    • The Magpie says:

      Thanks, already being featured in the blog with some defence of Typo Gleeson … in that he’s an Bryleen-creamed word-burgling bandicoot.

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