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The Magpie

Saturday, December 9th, 2023   |   239 comments

Bonfire Of The Inanities: Labor Throw More Logs On Its Own Funeral Pyre.

Maybe not in two weeks time, but perhaps by the following Christmas, we will all be able to warm our hands around the traditional Labor implosion, which will see Albanese give us the most unwelcome Christmas present imaginable – Peter Dutton PM.  The Magpie charts the spiral.

The TCC’s surprising unsought generosity to a council tenderer, saw almost doubling a quote that does not appear to be requested by the local business.  And the council public servants have refused to explain it. But Fightin’ Fran O’Callaghan is on the case, and has called them out.

The hard-hitting open letter to the Premier about juvenile crime … Thommo socks it to her again.

Forget Lansdown, check out Clive Palmer’s continued callous disregard for this city with his close–to-criminal shenanigans with Yabulu that almost put Magnis to shame.  His association with shysters with unsavoury business records is ensuring the re-opening of the nickel refinery is a long way off – if ever. And there’s an unreported related development that suggests ‘never’ might be the answer.

Putting Townsville’s plight into poetry … The ‘Pie discovers not so much an ode to joy,  more a reality check on just how hard we’ll have to work to ensure a happy and safe holiday period. A clever, funny  but sorta disheartening reality check from an anonymous versifier, illustrated by Bentley.

If you’d like to support your weekly Nest with a donation, to help meet the ever-present costs of this blog, the donation button is at the bottom of the blog. Probably a silly suggestion in this expensive holiday season, but hope springs eternal in The Magpie breast.

Labor’s Credibility Now Flatter Than A Driveway Cane Toad

While the traditional changes to the seasons seem to be getting out of whack, one time honoured seasonal tradition is going like clockwork, as the Australian Labor Party’s internal slow-burning wick snakes its way to  the inevitable implosion.

Albanese, basking in the hubris of getting elected because he wasn’t Scott Morrison, promptly dropped his pants and mooned the Australian public with his Voice To Parliament misjudgement. (In terms of gullibility, Albo ranks up there with Chamberlain’s ‘peace in our time’ gurgle in 1939, after being hosted by his pal, a certain A Hitler.)

The divisive fallout from the stunning Voice misadventure is still being witnessed around the country, and will be for a long time yet, as people realise that this prime minister tried to sell Australians out to a noisy, myth-spinning racist minority. But division seems to be in the DNA of the current Labor leadership cf South Australia’s failed attempt to erase public holiday names like Anzac Day,  Christmas Day and Australia Day. But hey, thanks, Albo, your blueprint.

And while Albo and crew adopted many of the previous government’s policies, including a cynical tax break for the rich while thousands are sleeping rough  in streets, cars and under bridges. The inability to crank up a workable housing policy was a major failure of this so-called battler’s party  was exacerbated by the Prime Minister’s overseas trips … all were known and were pre-arranged, many were necessary, but Labor’s failure to be ahead of the publicity curve, taking the public into their confidence, and explaining the basis for the necessity of the travel, the baying of the ‘headlines-at-any-cost’ media about Airbus Albo was like a howling dog sitting on a thorn but too lazy to move off it.

There were other lesser matters … the ploy of mass immigration during a housing and socially shattering rental crisis was excused as a way to keep inflation down (really? If you say so.) And the on-going mad-woman’s-breakfast of an unworkable ‘too much too soon’ climate policy

But then came the deeply idiotic, deeply cynical and cringeworthy response the monstrous Hamas terror attack,  and the subsequent fallout for the Australian community. Surely you’d expect only a prize idiot who leads a proud and successful (more or less) multicultural country to – can you believe it –  pick a fucking side in the latest bit of gross, religiously-motivated barbarity.  But no, in a modern version of All The Way With LBJ, Albanese announces ‘we’ are all in with Israel. And the NSW Labor leader orders the Israeli flag to light up the Opera House, FFS.  Can’t these fucking people read immigration statistics,  are the windows of their ivory towers fogged up they can’t see the bleedin’ obvious.  And these are the cretins who endlessly honk on about ‘the most successful multicultural society on earth’?

Instead of offering the mature, measured response necessary, providing commiserations and sympathy to Israel,  and condemning Hamas and its sickening barbarity – and ending our national support at that dignified point – ‘we’ pull on Israel’s state of origin jumper, ‘we’ then barrack for the home team having the right to retaliate in any way they think fit,  and ‘we’ initially applaud the inevitable (literal) overkill response. That posture ended any chance of a believable response reflecting Australians general disgust with the mass murder of hospital patients, women and children seeking refuge, on the tissue thin excuse that Hamas had bunkers underneath the buildings.  Even if they did (that’s yet to be proven when journalists are allowed tro see for themselves) the response was grossly out of proportion. And now ‘we’ are the proud owners of a bit of this new holocaust committed by the Israelis.

Cue even greater Labor-inspired division, because now, Albanese cannot come out with any credible statement deploring the killing of civilians, most women and children, because it was ‘our’ side committing the barely excused mass murder. If this is defense, one wonders what actual aggression looks like, but ‘we’ are in no position to squeak,  because now ‘we’ are the proud owners of our own bit of the new holocaust committed by the Israelis.  And yet, they then have the gall to decry the dangerous protesting divisions that have flooded our streets.

And then comes the debacle of the refugee release, which was a panicked response of a decision that could be foreseen, and in the event, any release should have waited until the High Court’s reasons were published.  (BTW it turns out it was illegal detention because Dutton, who designed the legislation while in government,  awarded the appropriate minister (himself at the time) the power to order such indefinite detention – and that, said the High Court, was their turf alone to have that power.) It didn’t take long for four of the grubs to commit crimes while out in the community. 

Albo , a shy master of the humblebrag,  assigned a bevy of ministers to handle this one, while cursed his luck at being in the country when it blew up.

So, thanks, Albo, you have now moved us closer to a disaster of a different kind … Prime Minister Peter Dutton.

A sort of political Sophie’s Choice we could well do without.

Secret Sign Language? The Walker Street Hermit Kingdom Keeps Mum …

… and its public servants refuse to even explain why one matter is a secret. Not even the usually parotted Commercial in Connivance. Here’s how the latest bit of transparency TCC-style came to our attention.
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That lastline is a corker, isn’t it? A councillor who represents ratepayers is denied information to justify a successful $635,000 tender inexplicably hiked by  $400,000+  by an unelected public servant.

And The Magpie reckons he knows who is – or should be – indignant with this secrecy. These blokes.

Screen Shot 2023-12-09 at 4.27.01 pm

(Not in order) Mitch James CEO and Managing Director,Terry McKenzie Ops Director, Rick Gillespie Development Exec, Lee Cohen Sales Director and a fifth unidentified.

The Magpie had a bit of a beak around – took him a while – but it seems that the company in question is Paradise Outdoor Advertising.  This happy crew of ad men look more like they’re ready for some professional bull riding rather than professional bullshiting,  but they seem to have a successful business with a solid track record.

So one imagines they would be mightily pissed off at any suggestion that ratepayers have illicitly funded a whopping tender increase for some contract or other, and would want the council to come clean about the matter. In fact, insist, in order to preserve their reputation.

Arrogantly refusing a councillor information she is entitled to – or, if legitimately not entitled to,  at least give a reason why – raises eyebrows and suspicions about a council highly on the nose already. No successful business (except News Corpse) would want to be identified as involved with what could appear as shady practice in Walker Street.

So perhaps the shiny-bum public servant who refused Clr O’Callaghan’s request might consider reassessing his position, which has accidentally reflected badly on a respected local company … unless of course he has something he wants to keep secret.

A New TCC CEO On The Cards?

With the inevitability of a slowly descending fog,  mists of rumour about the possible departure of Prins Ralston are getting thicker by the day. They started a few weeks ago, when The Prince made the finals of Council CEO of The Year awards. The interesting thing is that shortly afterwards the awards were announced, Mayor Mullet mentioned the matter an an industry breakfast, and jokingly suggested the council might need to start looking for a new boss and ‘anyone know a good CEO?”

Sure, a rhetorical question only,  Jenny, but with the madly twirling CEO turnstile in Walker Street, it’s a sure thing you fuckin’ don’t.

Keep An Eye Out For The Following In Monday – Maybe Tuesday’s Bulletin

The weekend Astonisher ran this piece of pointless twaddle on Saturday.

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This is just opportunistic and pointless gum flapping by a couple of minor characters suffering relative Deprivation Syndrome … the hubris of Dametto thinking he has the clout to call to Queensland ministers and unspecified ‘local leaders’ to a round table meeting next Wednesday for a pointless discussion about juvie crime is laughable in itself – unless he already knows such a meeting is on and will look like a hero when it happens. And Frothy Molachino’s appearance shows that this is no serious matter because if it was, he wouldn’t be anywhere to be seen, and Mayor Mullet would’ve elbowed her way front and center.  Or he’s gone rogue, which is in fact a possibility. But this empty flapdoodle was good enough for the unquestioning Bulletin, but the following wasn’t up to their lofty news standards, apparently … federal member for Herbert,  Phillip Thompson socking it to Premier Alphabet over the government’s disgraceful record on curbing crime. He sums up the community feeling perfectly.


As Thompson said on his FB page ‘We did it (recalled federal parliament), why can’t you?’

Good question.

Laugh At This … Or Maybe Cry

Aussie humour has always lightened up the some dark moments in our lives,  and there are some clever and funny people out there. Like the anonymous poet who penned the following ode to a Townsville Christmas, which has been perfectly illustrated by Bentley.

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The  Night Before Christmas In Townsville
It was the night  before Christmas, and all through the ‘Ville.
Little creatures from Kirwan were ready to steal.
All wallets are hidden, and cars locked with care.
With hope in the morning, they would all still be there.
The  children are sleeping, and parents alike.
Whilst in their backyard, someone’s stealing their bike.
I switched on the aircon, and began counting  sheep.
And settled right in, for a good night’s sleep.
When out on the  lawn, there arose such a clatter.
I sprang from the bed, to see what was the  matter.
Seems I forgot to lock my front door.
And someone drove away, in my commodore.
The police were called, to file a report.
We’ll be there in 4 hours came the retort.
Say goodbye to your car, and your neighbours new ute.
Cause police aren’t allowed to engage in pursuit.
The constable says,  I’m real sorry mate.
But our balls are in a vice, from the laws in this  state.
Coming straight out of Condon, and up to no good.
Gangs of delinquents, roam neighbourhoods.
They’re bashing, they’re stealing, they’re  cutting and burning.
They’re robbing, they’re breaking, each night they’re  returning.
Just when you believe they won’t go too far, 
They’re jacking old people, when they stop in their car.
You’ve set up the tree, and laid out the presents.
Too unaware of an intruder’s presence.
You’ve bought the  kids new scooters, knowing full well though.
They will shortly belong, to some kid in Kelso.
And the cricket bat for Timmy to swing in the park
Will  be used in a robbery, once it gets dark.
They’re creeping and sneaking,  quiet as a mouse.
As all electronics are removed from your house.
They  empty your cupboards, your pantry and drawers.
They’ll find where you wallet is hidden for sure.
Your statement will show that your AMEX and Visa,
Were maxed out at BWS Mount Louisa.
Stolen cars are pulled from Ross River by divers.
While an ambulance treats the 12 year old drivers.
They’re arrested and held by police til the morning.
When the judge lets them off with their 17th warning.
The magistrate happily let this farce go on longer.
Because it doesn’t affect them in Yarrawonga.
Christmas  morning you wake, and open your eyes.
And find with the greatest degree of  surprise.
That no burglar, no prowler, no mischievous brat.
Had managed to  break through the door of your flat.
The tree and the presents you managed to defend.
You must be the luckiest guy in West End.

The dog was let out, and your car may be taken,
But you somehow avoided a full blown break-in.
So key lock your doors, and keep valuables out of sight.
Merry Christmas to all, they’ll come back tonight

But, Gawd, There Some Very Unfunny Boofheads Out And About

A jarring, insulting note on ABC news on Friday night. A report on Jasper had an official exhorting us to calmly prepare for a possible visit from Jasper, and ensure we had the necessary cyclone stores on hand, including bottled water … but no more than 10 seconds later, we had some bald, wobbly-jowled walloper, noting that some supermarket shelves of bottled water had been cleaned out admonished people for ‘panic buying’.  Twerp.

Fatso Is Still Fucking About With Yabulu After a Year Of Lies

The future of the mothballed nickel refinery looks as clouded as ever, but comes into sharp focus for this city down that we may be facing down a cyclone. A direct hit by Cat 4 or 5 could spell an environmental disaster for Townsville, but the callous Palmer couldn’t care less, preferring to play his Little Richie Rich games with politics.

But if Jasper suddenly becomes the joker in the pack for Palmer, he could be facing the environmental clean-up costs he has so desperately tried to avoid by not completing any sale.

But perhaps you thought Yabulu had been sold to a Swiss-based company Zero Carbon Investek as reported last December, but, well, not really, that is a highly sus company, associated with a number of highly sus shonks, none less so than the bloke said to be its boss, disgraced former CPA president Richard Petty (he was kicked out for an accounting scam that ran for years, which forced him top flee the country).

And besides, it is c lear that palmer set it up and controls it anyway, so nothing has happened.

Screen Shot 2023-12-09 at 9.20.43 pm

Palmer blurted a lot  at the time about reopening the refinery and negotiating with the Townsville port to start importing and exporting nickel products, but not a single tonne has passed through the port in either direction ion the year since the announcement.  Petty has also gone to ground, and questions to Palmer are answered loftily by Fatso’s step’n’fetchit with ‘Mr Palmer will make an announcement when he’s ready.’ couple of months ago, the whole sorry scamming saga of a man who doesn’t think $24billion is enough was documented in a well researched article in the SMH.

Be all that as it may, an interesting bit of info floated into the Nest this week, concerning the nickel plant’s esclusive rights to the artesian water under the northern suburbs. This is a right conferred by a special act of parliament  (ordered by  Joh, ta muchly) which prohibits bores by farmers in the area.

Well, seems one such landholder found a sunset clause of sorts in the act, so he and a neighbour reapplied for their cancelled water licences … and they were granted.  The ‘Pie’s contact says another five landholders were then also granted reinstated water rights, but then Clive brought in the big legal guns, and it is said then even the solicitor working for the landholders was threatened and backed off. Threatened with what has not been specified.

But surely even Fatso has to be subject to the principle of ‘use it or lose it.’

Irony Corner

So Graham ‘whatever it takes’ Richardson has settled his dust up with unsavoury Sydney partner Danny Meares over the sale of The Watermark here in Townsville. Richo had 10% of the action, but reckoned he got dudded on the sale. Between these two, hard to know who to believe.

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And the irony is laid on with a trowel when we learn that a dispute in Townsville was Commercial In Confidence. How fitting.

This Week’s American Gallery

The lunacy continues.

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Screen Shot 2023-12-07 at 7.56.11 am Screen Shot 2023-12-05 at 9.46.09 am Screen Shot 2023-12-05 at 9.47.17 am Screen Shot 2023-12-05 at 9.47.36 am Screen Shot 2023-12-05 at 9.48.32 am Screen Shot 2023-12-06 at 12.40.49 pm Screen Shot 2023-12-06 at 12.42.46 pm Screen Shot 2023-12-06 at 12.43.11 pmAnd A  Couple of Notes From The Week

From the funny folks at The Shovel

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That’s yer lot for this week, but keep those comments coming in, they run 24/7 … and its all free around here. But of course, you are allowed to make a donation to show your love for The Nest and The Magpie … you can push button by hitting the one below.

The Magpie's Nest is now more than five years old, and remains an independent alternative voice for Townsville. The weekly warble is a labour of love and takes a lot of time to put together. So if you like your weekly load of old cobblers, you can help keep it aloft with a donation, or even a regular voluntary subscription. Paypal is at the ready, it's as easy as ... well, easy as pie. Limited advertising space is also available.


  1. Contributor says:

    So, to sum up this week’s column; you hate Labor, you hate Dutton, you hate Voice supporters, you hate Jenny, you hate the TCC CEO, you hate TCC employees, you hate young people in Townsville, (especially those who live in the former Thuringowa), you hate Clive, you hate American politics,……etc etc….. so much bile, so much negativity, so much cynicism. Your column is like a constant millstone around the (no doubt scrawny?) neck of this city. At this supposedly festive time, the Magpie plays Ebenezer Scrooge to the hilt. Dickens gave Scrooge three ghosts to help him see the error of his ways…I wonder what it will take to help you regain some modicum of faith in humanity, some positivity, and some capacity to contribute constructively to the future of Townsville in 2024?

    • The Magpie says:

      When a donkey brays at The Magpie, he doesn’t bray back … usually. But for you, Contributor, we make an exception.

      So you think Labor is great, Dutton is terrific, Voice supporters are well deserving salt of the earth, Jenny is doing a great job and is beyond criticism or examination, Prins is an upstanding and admirable man devoted to the city, actions of a few TCC employees are not to questioned (they are public servants FGS! – how dare one think doubt their integrity or competence), Clive should be Prime Minister, he’s a saint, and American politics are to be taken seriously. And I have no idea of your opinion of children any more than you have of mine – don’t know what you’re talking about there, unless you’re talking about juvenile criminals causing havoc across Townsville, which one guesses you shrug, give an indulgent chuckle and say ‘Give ‘em a break, kids will be kids, eh?’.
      Contributor (of nothing), you confuse commentary based on observation and fact as hate, and if you think this column which has no influence whatsoever over events in this Townsville let alone brisbane, Canberra or Washington is a millstone around the neck of this city, The Magpie is flattered … well, as much as one can be flattered by a dense dunderhead with motives and agendas that do not have the well-being of Townsville as motivation.

      • Contributor says:

        So easy to diss the opponent, hey mate (“dense dunderhead”!?), and you wouldn’t have a clue about my likes or dislikes…but you totally ( or deliberately) missed my point, which relates to your constant rampant negativity and seeming lack of ability to provide any constructive comment these days. It’s so easy to trot out a list of gripes and problems. It’s a mature and intelligent columnist who offers positive and constructive solutions instead. Unfortunately, it’s the Pie who “doesn’t have the well-being of Townsville as your motivation”, not me, someone who loves the place and would like to see it prosper.

        • The Magpie says:

          Amusing when a commenter condemns himself with his own comment. Go back and read your original comment, especially the light of your blubbing about about being ‘dissed’

          FYI, The Magpie tries to fill the information gap in areas that traditional media, especially the Bulletin, wilfully avoid. And you obviously only see what you want to see in the blog, there have been many constructive and positive suggestions over time, (inter alia helping save the ratepayers $18m earmarked to be wasted on a distant airport could be counted as constructive, perhaps) but The Nest is not predicated on solving issues, just ensuring that the issues are known. The ‘Pie isn’t up himself as far you obviously are to think he has all the answers, but many of his readers take advantage of the opportunity to make their often positive suggestions.
          And tell us all this: you have such a negative and derogatory opinion of this blog, why do you keep reading it? That in itself betrays a certain mental instability and lack of maturity. Oops, dissed you again, here’s a hanky blow your nose, and wipe your eyes … no, no, not in that order you old silly.

          • Prickster says:

            “Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.”

            ― Mark Twain

          • Ben Rumson says:

            Why does he keep reading it?
            For the same reason the prude goes to the beach full of scantily dress people.
            To be disgusted and having something to complain about.

        • Doug K says:

          Could Contributor be Dolan, who must be having nightmares about his Mullet meal ticket.

          • The Magpie says:

            Dolan couldn’t give a stuff about money, he is already very well heeled indeed, with enough to be thinking of starting a winery specialising in Socialist Chardonnay. And he’s hardly full time as a Mullet whisperer this time around, too busy getting the big bucks down south arguing against environmentalists blocking his client’s seaside development near Brissy.

    • Weary Dave says:

      Keep up the transparent commenting Pie, it’ll upset some like ‘Contributor’ … but oh well.

  2. In These Times-Personal Responsibility says:

    A summary of the changes to the Fairwork Act that passed last week can be read on the senate bills digest topic by topic on this link


    The insertion of recklessness helps get that conviction under s184 of the corporation’s act. Employers be held to how they signed an employee up , not how they changed it without employee consent. Fed wage theft crime too.

    Note, in 2020 the Qld Parliament amended the Qld Criminal Code s391 definition of stealing and s408C fraud specifically targetting wage theft here


  3. Prince Rollmop says:

    That list of Albo failures is quite an embarrassing read. It is a spectacular implosion by the man with the combover. Dutton must be salivating as he eyes off the PM role. Interestingly I read a few articles this past week about Albo in which he was labelled as a ‘beta male’. How fitting.

  4. Mike Douglas says:

    140 stolen cars 4 weeks + multiple police cars off the road and officers injured being rammed . Scott Stewart Business Class and all the Ministers trimmings flogging critical minerals New York . Aaron Harper puzzled the Street Uni Kirwan cost about $800k hasn’t stopped crime . Messagebank has time for a photo with the Wiggles . ” Wake up Les ” . Let them eat cake is local labor policy . Police arrests for alleged crimes 3 x15-16 year old girls Rasmussen no bail . 1 x16 yr old girl bail . All front the children’s court . It took the Queensland Auditor General to disclose nett 209 less Police officers in Qld vs last year .

    • I’m also Scoop says:

      Pretty much on the money Mike, except that the reduction in Police numbers was first identified to those outside government at Estimates on 9th August.
      Commissioner Carroll, when questioned by the Shadow Police Minister, said numbers were down 202.
      A few weeks later a Question on Notice showed numbers were down 204.
      Now the Auditor-General says 209.
      How can we expect the government to know how many perpetrators, or even victims, there are when their math is so poor they can’t keep an accurate count of the number of Boys and Girls in blue who’ve had a gut full of the broken system?

  5. Rotten Luck Willy says:

    A mis- diagnosis from a doctor will not cure the diseased patient.

    A problem cannot successfully be fixed until all aspects of the problem are fully identified and articulated.

    Which brings me to the disease of crime in Townsville. It is not youth crime. Youth from across the full spectrum of Townsville society are not breaking into countless homes, stealing 200+ cars a month, and endangering the lives of the public at large.

    It is aboriginal youth crime. And you can forget this First Nations bullshit. TI youth are not involved in this, it is aboriginal youth. Until the polititions and would be social engineers have the courage to correctly identify the problem there will never, (I’ll say it again.) never, be a successful solution. And the bleeding hearts are a big part of the solution not being found.

    Right, we have identified the problem. It is aboriginal youth crime. Now we can put the spotlight on the aboriginal community to learn what is going wrong and implement a preventive solution at the source of the problem.

    Now let’s look at the other aspect, punishment. As Phillip Thompson has stated, mandated minimum sentences and ‘one strike and you are out!’ The Cleveland Youth Respite Center is also a big part of the problem. It should be a really, really uncomfortable place where all youth fear to go, but it is not like that, is it? Very much the opposite. Further, the Youth Prison should be a safe working environment for the prison guards. If that requires a certain management style for the inmates, so be it.

    In conclusion;

    A mis- diagnosis from a doctor will not cure the diseased patient.

    • The Magpie says:

      There are those who might suggest your last line sums up your whole comment.

      • Rotten Luck Willy says:

        Well, those with such a suggestion might like to inform us all why the aboriginal youth crime epidemic has been allowed to develop to this level, and why it was allowed to develop at all, and how it will be solved, without fully diagnosing the problem.

    • Jeff, Condon says:

      Fri night/Sat morning, Six businesses, I think (Light-ons reporting is unclear) ram raided by a convoy of four reported stolen vehicles, three more QPS vehicles rammed plus the usual number B&Es, car thefts, home invasions and assaults.

      This isn’t just a crime wave it is more a declaration of war by one section of the community against the rest and they are winning. Therefore, it is time to tackle it more like a military operation and I don’t mean bringing in the army. If the enemy isn’t prepared to live within our rules, it is time they were seriously incapacitated by being removed to isolated locations where they are no longer a threat.

      RLW says that it is mainly aboriginal youth responsible for the majority of the offences and he is probably correct, as there are more aboriginals than TIs in Townsville.

      In Cairns they have more TIs and a different kind of crime. without the violence. The car thefts usually result in the damaged car being abandoned, not set alight. and they don’t attack the police or other citizens in their weaponised stolen vehicles.

      The rapid escalation in the brazenness, the level of violence when perpetrating offences and the reported tooling up with weapons is a strong indication that these thugs are going to kill someone soon, intentionally, or not, they don’t care. And our Premier will knee jerk again with another round of enenforcible scraps of legislation.

      • Rotten Luck Willy says:

        People have already been killed from this behavior.
        Some years back, maybe five but not sure, a couple of aboriginal teenagers were killed and car dismembered at an intersection, not sure which one. What was memorable was that some goose actually fixed an aborigine flag to a post near the car wreck. Photos in the Astonisher at the time. The Pie might have an image in his archive.
        Then, indirectly from this behavior was the death of Jennifer Board.

  6. Zeke says:

    This modest house that we call home
    Through lives of toil we’re proud to own
    Is under threat from little shits.
    The Ruling Class can kiss my arse
    If they think I won’t defend it.

  7. Cantankerous but happy says:

    I don’t know how anyone could complain about the job Albo is doing, remember all anyone cared about was getting rid of that arsehole Scott Morrison and replacing him with anybody else, Albo is doing exactly what the voters voted him in to do.

  8. Alahazbin says:

    Maybe Jenny should check with her ‘un-named’ public servant and see what his cut of the extra $400K is.

    • The Magpie says:

      Smells of conflict of interest, but The ‘Pie is POA will want it all out in the open before their reputation gets damaged (if they care enough).

  9. Prickster says:

    Does anyone else find it curious that there is so much commentary on the “housing crisis” with consensus on the cause being “migration intake at record levels”. I seem to remember not that long ago there were governments that could close borders instantly, and keep people out, as well as passing all sorts of new laws in the blink of an eye. Now we have uncontrolled intakes and with rapists, murders etc walking the streets after the releases from detention while we wait and wait for new laws, and government to make a decision.

    • The Magpie says:

      Well,a lot of that is just incorrect twaddle. The migrant intake IS cause for housing concerns, so much so that even the busted-arse Albanese Government has just announced dramatic cutbacks. The ‘uncontrolled intakes’ is utter bullshit, just fevered panic mongering, – and it would be news to the thousands hoping for family to join them. And it appears the government has successfully scrambled to play catch-up on laws to protect us (which should’ve been in place from the start).

      But hey, don’t let that stop you living up to your name, Prickster.

    • KC says:

      Rapists, murders etc walk the streets all the time after release from detention because they have served their time.

      • The Magpie says:

        What’s the relevance of that? You appear to be referring and comparing those who areAustralian citizens who have offended, been jailed and are released after their time is up?

        Those recently released were in ‘indefinite detention’ because they could not be deported because there was no country to accept them. They had, by definition, not ‘served their time’ for being mostly undocumented, illegal immigrants until the High Court ruled so. They were not in detention solely for their crimes of rape and murder.

        • KC says:

          They hadn’t served their time for their immigration status because they hadn’t been sentenced to anything. Whether a carceral solution was required is debatable. The broader context is that our prisons are filled with ever increasing numbers of unsentenced and uncharged individuals.

          • The Magpie says:

            If you’re an illegal immigrant, don’t think you have to be charged with anything if they don’t feel like it … you sneaked or tricked your way into Australia and are an illegal, and that’s that, deported back to where you came from or held here if no one will take you.

          • KC says:

            The High Court ruled that if there is no real prospect of a person being deported, it is unlawful for the government to detain them indefinitely.

          • The Magpie says:

            Yes, but wasn’t the crux of that ruling that the error Dutton made in framing the law was awarding the power of indefinite incarceration to the minister (himself at the time) and not as an option reserved solely for the courts? As should be the case in a democracy?

          • Prickster says:

            All potentially fine new Australians………;
            – Person A, sentenced to 22 years for the murder of his wife but served 18 years, in immigration detention for four years
            – Person B, sentenced to three years for people smuggling, in immigration detention for 11 years
            – Person C, multiple prison sentences including one for 10 months for punching his eight-month-old daughter, in immigration detention for nine years
            – Person D, no Australian convictions but has been of interest to ASIO, in immigration detention for 13 years
            – Person E, sentenced to three years and four months for trafficking a controlled drug, in immigration detention for two years
            – Person F, sentenced to 11 years for people smuggling, in immigration detention for two years and nine months
            – Person G sentenced to four years and six months for rape, false imprisonment and indecent assault, in immigration detention for five years

  10. Achilles says:

    It really is Christmas, Anna Puddleduck has announced she’s retiring.

    • Tropical Cyclone says:

      IMO. Unless you are willing to sack senior PS who Fxxxup then you as a state government are impotent. So I don’t see anything changing with the new prem or a change of govt. There have been many many times in the past 4 years when people in the PS should have lost their jobs. I do believe however the libs under David will be good at sacking the lower staffers. JMO

      • Hospital staff says:

        He didn’t sack our level last time he was on that is a complete lie. He was a part of a government that sacked middle and upper managers who didn’t need to be there. The correct people were sacked when LNP were last in power. I’m at the bottom of your ladder as you say and we don’t have enough people on the floor. But we have 5 levels management above me between Kieron keys and my cleaning cupboard. We need a major clean out of management and culture divisions in the health service. People arnt getting a bed because of that money being spent on shit like reconciliation and bullshit feel good programs that never will make a difference. And that’s just the healthcare system.

      • Jeff, Condon says:

        When Anna Bligh was re-elected she did more than sell off public assets and and abolish the the fuel subsidy. She also slashed budgets for departments and the coal face PS staff were the first to go. My department and others associated lost more than two thirds of their workers.

        I’m fed up with hearing about the scare mongering rants about what the Coalition will do.

  11. Jeff, Condon says:

    And in breaking news: Queensland Premier Annastacia Palaszczuk has announced she is resigning from the role after more than eight years in an emotional media conference.
    “It’s time for me to go and do something else.”

    I always said she would. Now what, CEO Olympics?


  12. J jones says:

    I thought she did a good job

  13. Achilles says:

    Regarding Fran’s concern of the extra $400,000.00 seemingly gifted unasked to Paradise Outdoor Advertising.

    Maybe, well just maybe because there will be a lot of extra bill boarding and advertising generally early next year, to tell us what a great job she’s been doing and why we should vote for her once again.

    • PoliWatcher says:

      Paradise advertising – I thought I read somewhere that Cr Batcovich’s partner works for them? I could be wrong…maybe someone can confirm?

      • The Magpie says:

        Used to, but Dan Ryder (last name sound familiar?) left to join Menninger Capital in late 2021 … he worked for POA from March 2020 to November 2021. Can’t see any conflict of interest, if that’s what you’re hinting at.

  14. Prince Rollmop says:

    Palletchook was on a hiding to nowhere. Health in crisis, infrastructure in crisis, Olympic costs which will set Brisbane backwards by 20 years, police force in crisis, juvenile crime in crisis, and the list goes on. She leads a two-bit ministerial team who are quite simply out of their league. Hopefully Beetle Bailey, Smiley, Fentanyl, and D’arth Vader will follow suit and also seek new pastures. At least she can now spend her time at A-class events with lover boy who wears technicolured jackets Good riddance. Dont bang the door on the way out…

    “Show Queensland Labor the door in 24”

  15. Alfred E Neuman says:

    More than 200 cars stolen each month for the last two months in Townsville according to the Ch 7 news.
    Are there any stats for how many successful break-ins and attempted break-ins in Townsville for the same period in order to access keys to steal the cars?
    I am guessing the numbers must be horrendous, especially considering an unsuccessful break-in that leaves no damage would remain undetected by the occupant and unrecorded.
    Widely advertising the number of break-ins together with the number of stolen cars may add ammunition for the Townsville community to pressure the Government for change.
    Yes, yes I know. Such pressure would not be detected by Aaron Harper, as the entire Townsville community, except for Aaron, is a LNP rent-a-crowd.

  16. Rory says:

    Ding dong the witch is dead….what a wonderful piece of news. Hoorah. The woman who mandated COVID vaccines yet stalled to have her own shots while we were all being made to have them, the woman who backed every poor decision Jeannette Young made during the COVID farce which saw thousands lose their jobs, businesses, and homes…farewell Anna.

  17. Mates rates says:

    Poor old Elusive Butterflog must be having heart palpitations reading about Phil’s letter to Nanna Anna, and now Anna’s resignation. Somebody please do a mental health check on Butterflog.

  18. Bob Ferguson says:

    It’s no wonder the Mullet has approved the Increased budget for Paradise outdoor Advertising. Bet her dial is in all the council adds, election time soon.

  19. Bob Ferguson says:

    Dear Anna has stepped off the ship that’s destined to sink at the next election. And she tearfully said she had given her all.
    All alright, as of June end, 2023 Qld was in debt to the tune of $107billion and counting. For those doing the sums a billion is 1000million now that’s a lot of money.

  20. Superduper says:

    Dud Minister Aaron Harpic posted some arse-licking dribble about Palasczuk on his Faecesbook page. People are sticking it to Anna, so Harpic had a rant about trolls etc. Funny shit to read. He really is an emotional whimp isn’t he?

  21. Mr Magoo says:

    So Anustascia Palletjack has resigned! You beauty. The downside is that Miles, Dick, and Fentiman are the three being touted as replacements. An absolute bunch of dropkicks. Dross replacing dross.

  22. Doug K says:

    I too am guessing that the extra $400,000 in billboard costs could be for election campaigning signs thinly disguised as community messages.
    The same thig is happening with the local newspaper. Full page ads for things that shouldn’t need to be advertised, or at best should be small ads in the Public Notices section of classifieds.
    If I’m guessing right, how does she get away with it?
    Anyway, I for one will be keeping an eye out for new billboard signs over the next few months.

    • Prince Rollmop says:

      Doug, these people are skilled at riding the thin line between a breach of governance and what is permissible by law. This little ‘advertising’ stunt is most certainly an electioneering trick, however it falls within the bounds of what is legal. Much of politics is based on trickery, smoke and mirrors, and psychological warfare.

  23. Kenny Kennett says:

    Well, why wouldn’t the Mullet plan her billboards now while she can pay for her campaign using ratepayer money. POA don’t care where the money comes from as long as it ends up in their pockets. A bit extra here and there and by March, the whole campaign is paid for. Then the Mullet and her school of rotting fish have their mug shots in our face spread around the town. Keep auditing Fran, you might just find a lot more.

  24. Spielcheque says:

    It may well be that Clive Palmer is subject to the ‘use it or lose it’ principle regarding the QNI plant at Yabulu, the groundwater resources of the Black River catchment and the extensive import / export facilities at the Port of Townsville, but honestly, I doubt it. The myriad companies that make up the derelict abandoned (“mothballed” if you must) Yabulu operation are, I think, still in a joint venture with the Queensland government. We lucky taxpayers have, since the early 1970s, had about a quarter share in the deal, reduced a bit by the Goss government in 1992. Clive has us by the short and curlies and doesn’t he know it.

    • The Magpie says:

      In that case, any word of condemnation for the Queensland Government that allowed the loss of 800 jobs – plus the service jobs in the community supported by those workers – that put this city back light years in development?

  25. Spielcheque says:

    Magpie, you have contributed to the millions of words turned out about the disaster unfolding in Israel; here’s a sober bit of context from today’s Conversation:


    • The Magpie says:

      And here’s another perspective that is a courageous condemnation of Israel’s mindset, made by an Israeli Jew … and yes, he’s a journalist, it always takes a journalist.

      • The Magpie says:

        And another note on the New Holocaust.

      • Ducks Nuts says:

        Levy could have been describing a narcissist.
        I’m better than you.
        I’m chosen
        The rules don’t apply to me
        I’m the only victim here, I’ve suffered more.
        You are not human like me (an effort to discredit Palestinian existence)

    • The Magpie says:

      And here’s a bit of truth-telling likely to set many back on their heels. Gideon Levy is an Israeli journalist who has been covering Israeli issues for 30 years. His address recently to the National Press Club in Washington caught many off-guard in a room full of pro-Palestinian media. Talk about shining a journalist shining a light in a dark corner.Levy is critical of the twisted Israeli justification for the war on children and innocents, a core sophism that makes themselves the victims. At one stage, he quotes the chilling words of Golda Meir ‘I will never forgive the Arabs for us to kill their children.’
      And it is important to remember one thing: being anti-Israeli is NOT anti-semitism per se, The Magpie has known many jewish people who are strongly anti-Zionist(Israeli).

      MAGPIE NOTE: If googling the full speech, do not mistake his more prominently displayed 2015 speech to the same club as the one containing the above clip, which was from his address in September this year. Although The ‘pie sighted it, he has not been able to re-discover the link to the full speech of this year, otherwise he would have posted it.

      • Spielcheque says:

        Unfortunately, Magpie, there is a typo in your quote of Golda Meir. Here’s the full text:

        “When peace comes we will perhaps in time be able to forgive the Arabs for killing our sons, but it will be harder for us to forgive them for having forced us to kill their sons. Peace will come when the Arabs will love their children more than they hate us.”

        ― Golda Meir, A Land of Our Own: An Oral Autobiography

        • The Magpie says:

          Good extended quote, The ‘Pie took his quote from Gideon Levy’s speech. But the full quote doesn’t soften the Israeli arrogance much, and Meir was one of those clever Jewish women who was great with an aphorism, but this one, while sounding deeply wise and clever, is meaningless. Would it be just as valid and lauded as brilliant arguing if Hamas declared ‘we will never forgive Israel for making us kill the Israeli hostage’?
          And Meir’s last line smacks of the Chosen Ones myth, airily dismissing the issue of Israeli intransigence about Palestinian claims for at least a West Bank state of their own. You know, that’s the arrogance and superiority Levy talks about.

  26. Prince Rollmop says:

    Fearless Fran peeking under rocks and checking inside closets for sneaky little questionable TCC expenditure. Here is her latest Facebook post;

    Question to the Mayor as to why Council receives multiple tickets to the Chairman’s Lounge at the Cowboys home games and who has enjoyed them.

    Please can I be advised why under your leadership as Mayor, the Townsville City Council receives multiple tickets to the Chairman’s Lounge at Cowboys home games. The first I knew about the “Chairman’s Lounge” was when I was approached by a member of the public recently who asked me why Council had numerous “chairs” in this most elite part of the stadium when the tickets were very expensive. It is my understanding that Council has enjoyed these “chairs” for many years. I have recently asked for the details of all persons who have enjoyed this lavish and luxurious lounge for the last three years courtesy of councils sponsorship of the Cowboys with ratepayer monies, and I have been advised that I cannot be given the names of guests, but I believe I certainly should have been provided at first instance with the names of councillors or council executives/staff who have enjoyed these tickets and how many times. I have now had to make a subsequent request for this information.
    Why is it Council is not able to sponsor the Cowboys without multiple, lavish, top of the range “chairs” being included in the arrangement for a very select few councillors, staff or their chosen ones to enjoy. How do these “chairs” serve the ratepayer of Townsville many of whom are struggling with cost of living pressures including substantial Council rates? I fully support Council sponsoring the Cowboys but is this not a case of snouts in the trough?

    • Spielcheque says:

      Question: when the Council “receives multiple tickets to the Chairman’s Lounge at the Cowboys home games”, who does it receive these tickets from? Like, who is the Chairman who has the lounge? Is that a Cowboys thing, a Stadiums Queensland thing or a TCC thing?

      • The Magpie says:

        Reasonable question, but The ‘Pie doesn’t think too much turns on this … certainly cost isn’t a factor because the council receives the tickets gratis … it is a pretty standard deal, and would not affect – one way or the other – the TCC support for the team.
        BUT what could be a worry … in fact is a worry … the guest list, which could be a highly questionable exercise … just like the SuperPests. And it is utter, despicable and grossly insulting bullshit to claim ‘privacy’ for guests, this unnecessary bit of arrogant crap screams ‘dodgy deal’ … is it some sort crime to be the guest of the mayor or the council? They sure make it fucking sound that way.

  27. The Wulguru Wonder says:

    Has anybody told Lawrence Springborg? Surely a coup he didn’t see coming … or by Albo, seeing Swanny jump ship.

    Seems Oz online has similar problems to the Astonisher.

    • Jeff, Condon says:

      Didn’t recognize her. She piled on the weight. Is there such a thing as a Labor fat cat?

      • The Magpie says:

        Know the woke crowd will chuck a tanty for fat shaming, but Christ, it is so quick and so noticeable, soon Anna will need a bookmark in her neck to find her pearls.

  28. White Mouse says:

    Is it TCC or Main Roads who are changing where you can and can’t turn make turns. Example, used to be able to turn right from Leopold St onto Nathan St, but now if you want to travel toward Ross River Road, you need to go over the bridge and around the big roundabout or join the congestion outside the Stockland carpark on Alfred St.

    Also noticed that you can no longer turn from inbound Ross River Road onto West St, Mundingburra (this job is at least 2 weeks late in finishing). This was the first turn after Anne St that had direct access to Fulham Road, but now you would either have to zig zag through the other side streets or go down to Gulliver St. I was a long time resident in that little pocket of Mundingburra and cannot recall it being an accident hot spot.

    • Alahazbin says:

      WM, Never ever used that ‘rat run’ through West St. could never see the point. Stopping that right turn out of Leopold St is a good idea. Could someone explain the staggered white line for the left lane suicide lane at Stocklands. It will be a drag race on the green now.

  29. Elusive Butterfly says:

    So, Mr. Pie, the Polish Premier from Inala, has taken a leaf out of Morrison’s book…”I don’t hold a hose, mate!”…and thumbed her nose at North QLD one last time.

    “Cyclone, what cyclone, I don’t give a shit if there’s a cyclone out there, I’m resigning and sailing off into the sunset with my darling Reza. Just not in North QLD waters”

    The boy from Ingham could make a meal out of this!

    • The Magpie says:

      Well, he could if she actually said that.

    • Achilles says:

      Point of order Ms Blowfly, I am no supporter of the Ex premier, However her ancestry is irrelevant.

      I’m sure that YOu and about 95% of Magpies audience are mostly descended from outside of the GSL.

      • The Magpie says:

        But she herself has said … as her Dad did many many years ago, too … she is extremely proud of the fact, so where’s the problem mentioning it. In fact, a migrant-makes-good-story … although in her case, it would be a ‘migrant makes good-ish story.

        Wonder how Reza will last now the free tickets have dried up?

        But there’s one group cursing their luck … so called journos at the Astonisher, who’ve only just mastered spelling Palaszczuk (8 out of 10 average).

      • Sergeant Gunney Highway says:

        My heritage is Townsville born and bred and I’m proud of it. As for Anastascia being Polish, Poland has a good army. Small, but loyal and determined. Hopefully I get to fight alongside some Polack’s one day.

    • Spielcheque says:

      The boy from Ingham via Mundingburra and Broadwater will be holding his breath. No matter what else happens he will need to stay onside with the federal government (of the day) in order to secure their funding of the Olympics. Damning with faint praise will not be enough although blaming the previous mob will work up to a point. Is there an LNP candidate for Thuringowa yet?

  30. Jeff, Condon says:

    I’ve heard it all now. I just heard Craig Crawford Labor MP, member for Barron River interviewed on the ABC radio, about 4:50 pm.

    Discussing the process of selecting a new Premier, what with the unions, caucus and the factions. He described it as being a bit like the TV show, Big Brother.

    Ahhh, so that’s the reason.

    • The Wulguru Wonder says:

      If it comes to a contested leadership, the ALP rules require a ballot of the parliamentary caucus, rank & file party members, and affiliated unions, which by all reports will be a months-long process.

      My question is: who is the Premier of Queensland while this takes place? Or does the government and the state just stumble along leaderless until the back room deals are all done? (Would we mug voters and taxpayers even notice any difference?)

      • The Magpie says:

        The Little Boy Called Smiley is the deputy P isn’t he? He would be the interim leader, no?

        • Prince Rollmop says:

          If you go by what I saw on the news last night with Smiley doing an interview in which he has taken charge of the disaster management process for cyclone Jasper, he is already acting Premier! Makes sense considering Nanna Anna’s last day is this Friday.

          Taking factions into account and examining the left and right agendas, Dick doesn’t stand a chance, the competition is between Smiley and Fentanyl. My money is on Smiley based on union support, experience, and the overall numbers. That said, he is still a dipshit like the rest of the Palletjack ministry.

  31. Doug K says:

    At a time when Trump, Putin and all the other despots and Hitler wannabes are somehow still seen as the future, please take the time to watch this doco from ABCTV last night:

  32. Mike Douglas says:

    Palaszczuk has cut and run leaving Olympics mess Gabba + Ekka wise . Record homelessness , crime , cost of living pressure families . Instead of acting in the best interest of Queenslanders Fentimen , Miles , Dick , Unions are fighting over the leadership . On the local front forget all the issues Les is doing his Christmas cards , Scott his Christmas shopping in New York and Aaron it’s a full time job deleting comments off his Facebook post . Council wise not much different with 14 weeks until March 16 th ( minus caretaker ) Team Hill madly designing artwork how lucky we are to have them $400 k extra Paradise signs and how many full pages in the bulletin . High Vis for everyone to show they are in charge .

  33. The Cyclone v piwer says:

    The Power WILL be getting turned off before the cyclone hits up north. I just want to know the criteria they use. It IS justified. What’s the actual criteria and parameters ? Distance, windspeed any arbitrary boundaries for instance?

    • Spielcheque says:

      If you already know the power “WILL” be getting turned off at Cairns?, at Port Douglas?, at Mossman?, “before the cyclone hits”, then you must have a source for this information? You (or someone with a similar moniker) wrote last week that there is a procedure. What is this procedure? What exactly are you referring to?

    • Mangrove Jack says:

      During “Yasi”, I lost power due to a large tree taking out a power pole about 2 streets away, then ERGON had to “Manage” power into my area while they completed repairs about 4 days later. I had friends in a newish sub-division that never lost power at all during that cyclone due to them having all electricity lines underground.

      Pretty sure there is no turning off the power by ERGON, you should have power until something breaks.

    • PR Filter says:

      From Ergon Energy – Cyclones and flooding can have major impacts on our network and there may be times when we need to de-energise areas at short notice for public safety and to reduce the risk of more significant damage.
      We’re closely monitoring Cyclone Jasper, and will make decisions on a case-by-case basis depending on the weather conditions at the time, and whether there is a risk of inundation.
      ???????? ???????????? ???????????? ???????????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????? ????????-???????????????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????? – if this changes due to safety concerns, we’ll update Outage Finder: http://tinyurl.com/2p897865

      • The Magpie says:

        Link please. The ‘Pie would make that a polite question instead of a request, but he can’t ask one, you seem to have cornered the market on that grammatical mark.

        • The Cyclone v power says:

          The ABC said that there would be a peremptory shut off of the power on ABC 24 this morning. I also remind people that here in Townsville just before Yasi , Bligh gave a speech on tele , said good luck and you are all on your own till it’s over . And when she finished they flicked the switch.

          • Spielcheque says:

            Blah, blah, blah. The ABC SAID this, Bligh SAID that. What actually happened on the ground? What is happening on the ground this morning in Port Douglas, Mossman and Cairns?

  34. Kenny Kennett says:

    Miles is new Premier! Now we are the laughing stock of the country. The door is really open now, David C. We’ve now got a fucking knob as Premier and a Dick as his assistant.

    • PR filter says:

      This is the Christmas present the LNP have been waiting for. With Miles limping along as Premier towards the election and with Fentiman and Dick sniping from the sidelines while they wait for the opportunity to roll him after October, all the LNP needs to do is stick to the high ground.v

      The problems ALP faced last week are identical and entrenched so there will be no magic BB for the government to fire and make things better.

  35. Doug K says:

    When the Royal Rollmop said “Much of politics is based on trickery, smoke and mirrors, and psychological warfare”, for some reason I immediately thought of Jenny Hill.
    Strange that.
    As for those extra billboards, the council spin doctors are going to have trouble finding something the puppet councilors have actually done to earn their money, apart from raising their hand at council meetings when told to do so.

  36. The Magpie says:

    No it hasn’t … the BOM begs to differ with you, you premature ejaculating turnips.

    And that side bar ‘Premier Vote Looms’ – it was all done and dusted as the presses rolled, more careful wording might have avoided the embarrassment, especially with the story tipping Fentiman.

  37. Kenny Kennett says:

    11.30am news interrupted by news flash – yes Miles said he’d deputise his Dick. But he started with a 90 secs intro that today and tomorrow they are focused on a category 1 cyclone in the far north. So it’ll happen then they’ll get it all cleaned up by Thursday. Then he spent the next 8 minutes talking about himself and his Dick. Then straight into how the Labor party are freezing the cost of car rego for the next 12 months …effective from today. If Queensland is in great shape, why does everyone (plus the Unions and Caucus) want Pluckerfuck out so quickly.

    • Yazoo says:

      Agreed. A pissy discount in rego while the southeast spends hours in traffic gridlocks losing valuable business time and wasting fuel. Fucked State infrastructure, obscene payrises for politicians, an even more obscene waste of money on the Olympics, a rooted health system and Miles still thinks he will win on October?? Keep dreaming mate. Tick tock.

      • The Magpie says:

        Of course Labor can;’t win … gawd, you’re surely not believing ‘It is the right time to go, and hand over to another’ malarkey are you? She is disappearing faster than a Triple Mac in Clive Palmer mitt, putting as much time between her overdue departure and the inevitable disaster at the polls.

    • Spielcheque says:

      In a move likely to be a relief for opposition leader Crisafulli, Miles is moving the Olympics somewhere outside of party political fiddling – as long as Palaszczuk doesn’t get the job running it:

      “He also revealed he had been “convinced” of the need for an independent authority for infrastructure delivery for the Olympics and Paralympics. Miles said he would get work under way establishing the body as soon as he was in the job.”

      • The Magpie says:

        Interesting and responsible move and it is fair game for speculation, but not likely to help the regions one bit, it’ll just keep the graft and corruption slightly below the Al Capone level. It will also be a body that can be blamed by whatever government is in power for forcing unpopular decisions on them. (‘We’d love to fix ambulance ramping, but the IOC is insisting on solid gold cross bars for the three day event. What can we do?’)

  38. Woodduck says:

    What’s happened to harpics Facebook page, seems to have disappeared, anyone know? Knowing his spineless acts in the past he could have shut it down due to all the negative comments about his beloved leader getting the shove.

    • The Magpie says:

      Probably just clearing the decks before Smiley appoints him to the twin portfolios of Health and Police.

    • Mike Douglas says:

      Woodduck . Harpers facebook is fine and he posted about the car rego and hour ago . Rumours the new Premier Miles is in the Ville tomorrow . If Miles is clearing out Ministers like Dath , Bailey etc where does that leave marginal MP,s like Harper , Walker ? .

    • Alahazbin says:

      Duckie, if you have ever criticised him, you have been blocked.

  39. Achilles says:

    So now Oz has 2 Dicks running the show. One Fed, One State,

    Scary stuff! it reminds me of my Grandfather’s colourful expression when gently informing you that you are a bloody idiot; mainly coz you’d been caught.

    He’d just say softly but firmly “Well you must have 2 dicks, coz nobody could be that stupid by playing with just one”.

    • The Magpie says:

      Well, get the bidea but doesn’t quite work, Comrade Cameron ios the deputy premier, which will make him in The Nest The Deputy Dick.

  40. I get it says:

    I get it. I just figured out why you don’t see women posting on this site anymore!

  41. Prince Rollmop says:

    A question from Fran to Mayor Mullet, copied from Fran’s Facebook page;

    Question to the Mayor as to will she request all councillors to publicly declare how much of their $22,000 Materials and Services budgets they have spent before the notice of election is issued on 29th January 2024.

    Please can I be advised if under your leadership as Mayor, in the interests of transparency, you will request all councillor’s to publicly declare how much of their individual $22,000 Materials and Services Budgets they have spent prior to the notice of election being issued on 29th January 2024? Under your leadership the Materials and Services budgets for each councillor have increased in the last three budget years from (approx figures) $9k to $15k to this election year $22k. The notification to the public of this expenditure does not ordinarily occur until the Council Annual Report is published in October following the financial year.
    Will you also ensure that no promotional merchandise purchased by a councillor with these ratepayer funds is given away by councillors after the notice of election is issued on 29th January 2024 which is classed as the beginning of the election period?

    • Spielcheque says:

      Prince, don’t know about you but I find it boring and frustrating when people go on Facebook to ask a question of, in this case, the mayor, and have no chance whatsoever of the mayor answering the question online (on Facebook), let alone in the public sphere. So we get left with Cr Fran having no public profile apart from a constant low level whinge about transparency in council procedures.

      If Cr Fran wants our vote to put her in charge of the $892.6 million TCC budget (2023/24 numbers), we need to know something, Christ anything, about her aspirations outside the council chamber. She could start by revealing how she intends to spend her individual $22,000 Materials and Services Budget.

      • The Magpie says:

        While The ‘Pie tends to agree with the second half of your comment, the first par is childish.

        Fran is still a councillor, and she is letting people know that she is calling out … and unsuccessfully inquiring about something we are entitled to know. By your yardstick, questioning any political decision by anybody is whinging. And you’d better believe it, if someone on FB stated ‘Jenny Hill deliberately killed a motorcyclist’ (she didn’t) there would be a fairly swift reaction. Harpic is proof that you are wrong, and there are dozens of instances around the place that also knocks your hypothesis into a cocked hat.

        • Spielcheque says:

          ” . . . . and unsuccessfully inquiring about something we are entitled to know.”

          I take it you mean that ‘we’ ratepayers are entitled to know who the mayor chooses to invite to share the (presumably) free grog and savouries provided in the Chairmans Lounge at the stadium (which is not a Council facility)? By what mechanism are ‘we’ entitled to know this?

          • The Magpie says:

            Under the conflict of interest requirements, morally if not legally – although one could imagine authorities might want to ask a question or two. But let’s put the Gucci pump on your other foot … what mechanism dictates that the ratepayers are not entitled to know who is wined and dined by our duchess?

            Your remain a bit whiffy, SpC.

        • Spielcheque says:

          Queensland taxpayers may well be entitled to know who ‘The Chairman’ (presumably of Stadiums Queensland) invites to enjoy a freebie at any of their state-owned stadiums. I won’t be losing sleep over it. If the Premier or the PM were in town on game day I’d expect them to be invited and I wouldn’t expect to see a list of who came along with them. I imagine heaps of public officials in Townsville, including local and regional politicians at every level, have been invited and actually attended at the trough, with or without an entourage. Is there something sinister, unethical or immoral about this?

          • The Magpie says:

            You’re really not very good at your job of deflecting away from the subject to protect those who have put you up to this hokum, are you, SpC?

            So, is there something sinister, unethical or immoral about, let’s say, a donor to Team Hill being invited to the stadium as a TCC guest using the freebies handed out by the Chairman? Or tha someone on a published list of such guests later becomes a donor? Any reasonably minded person such as unlike yourself would understand that transparency is what is being sought here, and the fact that the mayor and council refuse to name their guests on spurious grounds of ‘privacy’ automatically raises the question of why the secrecy? What possible harm can befall a person named as a guest of the TCC, what public opprobrium would flow from a simple list? Is there something shameful in being ‘outed’ as someone who ate a council sausage roll or drank a glass of Jenny’s top of the line KangaRouge?

            This sort of obfuscation – so utterly unnecessary – is at the core of the deeply held suspicions about the operations of this council and of Jenny Hill.

          • Spielcheque says:

            Why specifically JHill? If you have suspicions about lobbyists or potential donors hanging about amongst politicians likewise invited to the Chairman’s Lounge, why not ask about them? For example, has the Member for Kennedy, Dawson or Herbert (all likely contenders) ever been a guest of the Chairman? Should we be concerned about who else was in the room at the time?

          • The Magpie says:

            Why not Hill and the council? If it’s OK with you – or even if it’s not – the Magpie will select his priorities, and if they don’t suit you, look elsewhere.

            The Magpie could explain the flaw in your latest drivel, but has decided you are just a time waster … if you’re not driven by some hidden agenda, then you’re just an irritating fruitcake.

  42. Prickster says:

    Scott Stewart also resigning?

  43. Prince Rollmop says:

    Interview with Phil Thompson re youth crime in Townsville; (WARNING: this clip contains footage of Phil Thompson and that may cause Elusive Butterflog to have a meltdown)


  44. Dick pics says:

    Please people, no more Dick pics !

    • A tale of two dicks says:

      Cameron Dick has giant wingnuts and he looks a little bit like a Disney toy. His brother Milton Dick looks like a dark haired version King Kong.

  45. Doug K says:

    Mike D, I hope and pray Giggles Miles doesn’t dump Harper and Walker.
    Getting rid of our three head nodding local MPs will be crucial in getting a change of government – and finally some real action on juvenile crime.
    Stewart is smart enough to keep his head down and hope voters think he’s not part of the problem, but Harper and Walker are about on the same intelligence level as Miles.

  46. Chucky cheese says:

    I heard Albo’s new nickname of ‘Kit Kat’ because he is always taking breaks.

  47. Rotten Luck Willy says:

    Not satisfied with raming police cars the aboriginal criminal youth are targeting ambulances. There is a high probability that a patient in an ambulance, not promptly getting to the hospital, will die.


  48. The Magpie says:

    Those poor bastards in Cairns/Port Douglas, being smashed by winds that are two thirds of the way to breaking the sound barrier. That is, if you get your info from the Courier Mail.

    FYI sound barrier at sea level is 1236km/h.

    • Ben Rumson says:

      And that wind speed is for a Cat 1 cyclone. For a Cat 5 it would break the sound barrier. After the cyclonic sound barrier boom everything would be silent. How peaceful.

      • The Magpie says:

        Sorry, Ben, your comment has just been blown away.
        From Wiki:

        In tropical cyclones, wind gusts in excess of 90 km/h can be expected around their centre, or eye, while in the most severe events, gusts can exceed 360 km/h. Although the strongest winds are near the eye, damaging winds can extend hundreds of kilometres from the centre.

  49. The Magpie says:

    Seems that even Wikipedia could do with a bit of subbing.

    Was looking about for some arcane matter to with cricket when The ‘Pie came across this little pearler.

    FYI Wiki, in cricket, ‘chuckles’ is Kerry O’Keefe in the commentary box.

    Also not sure about that definition, doesn’t seem to explain the problem to The ‘Pie.

  50. Jatzcrackers says:

    Just saw a post on Bookface with mayor Mullet handing out certificates to new Australians (no, not us) all decked out in the mayoral robes. The possum fur definitely looks better on the possums ! Sorry no pic or link !

  51. Rotten Luck Willy says:

    Not Townsville, but WA.

    A prime example of a fucked up judiciary dripping in woke virtuosity.


  52. PoliWatcher says:

    I’ve heard that Queensland’s electoral boundaries will be redrawn again for the 2028 State election and it will impact the communities North of Townsville. The suggestion is that Hinchinbrook will be redrawn and that a new electorate will be created taking into account the Northern Beaches and those a little west of it. Has anyone else heard about this?

    • The Magpie says:

      ‘You’ve heard …’ and ‘ it’s suggested’ begs the question just where did YOU hear this suggestion? Might be true but you’re very hazy … front bar, dinner party, gay sauna, where is the hot rumour du jour?

    • Bullshit says:

      The number of electorates is set at 93 in the act I think so that would have to be manually changed before a new electorate could be created.

      Looks like a lot of electorates in the south east are over quota https://www.tallyroom.com.au/53555

      • PoliWatcher says:

        Thank you. This is good information. I note that in this article the author also states “Presumably a redistribution will commence in the following term [post 2024 election] to cover the 2028 election. ”…so changes are ahead, but whether a new electorate is created is probably unlikely.

        • Spielcheque says:

          Poli, there are five state electorates that cover parts of Townsville – Mundingburra, Townsville, Thuringowa, Burdekin and Hinchinbrook. Each will have had a population increase since the last redistribution. And in a new redistribution, the quota for each electorate will be increased to accommodate the overall increase in Queensland’s population. So there need not be a new electorate created, just a tweaking of the boundaries.

          • The Magpie says:

            Agree. Cannot see any point in creating a new electorate, the average delectorate population is – sorry, could be – served adequately by the current crop of wind machines.

  53. Inspector Clouseau says:

    Justin Langer commenting on the First Cricket Test – ‘Warner and Khawaja know each other intimately and always have each others backs’………ummm, ok, have the boys just been inadvertently outed???

  54. Jeff, Condon says:

    Nick Dametto has really lost the plot this time. He has written to Richard Marles requesting Army assistance in the war between kiddie crims in Townsville and the people. He said that the army’s experience in espionage (is he suggesting soldiers could masquerade as 10 yo’s to infiltrate the gangs?), communications expertise (QPS have that sewn up), patrolling hotspots (to what avail?), and manning roadblocks (roadblocks?) would assist the police whose civilian styled cars weren’t built to sustain deliberate ramming by crazy kids. To be fair, he didn’t suggest bringing in tanks and armoured cars to take the place of police cars. He also dismissed the Polair chopper concept as unneeded. Bob needs to take Nick behind the toilet block and give him some contact counselling.

    • Ducks Nuts says:

      Bob needs to drop Nick off into one of those crocodile infested rivers Bob is always banging on about, for a closer look. Perhaps they could both take a closer look.

    • Bullshit says:

      The Polair chopper isn’t really needed but it will give the wallopers a bit of fun.

      • Rotten Luck Willy says:

        Your flippant reply is contemptible.
        “The wallopers a bit of fun.” You say. I say you are an ignorant fuckwit.

        Rotary wing reconnaissance and surveillance, night vision capable, with thermal and infra-red imagery, long range photography, night sun illumination, real time communications is, you fucking idiot, not a bit of fun for the wallpapers, as you call the police, but a necessary resource to combat weaponised aboriginal youth crime in Townsville, the largest city in northern Australia.

        Being the ignoramus you are you will be oblivious to the other benefits such an aerial platform would be to North Queensland.

        And finally Mr Bullshit, I hope the dung beetles deal with you quickly.

        • The Magpie says:

          A police helicopter is going to be of little use if other laws aren’t changed, especially the pursuit laws – under certain circumstances. Those circumstances should be mindful of public safety but not the safety of the car thieves i.e on an open open highway, chase like hell, but if they do it on crowded roads, and the little fuckwits will be driven to even more stupid responses that will injure or kill innocent citizens.

          • Non Aligned Worker says:

            Magpie, Latest police release says “57 people have been arrested in relation to 354 offences in total since Operation Victor Romney was established on Friday December 8, “. I would love to see the statisics on how many offenders were locked up and how many only received a slap on the wrist. Are court records available to show the stats and charges? (names of the offenders wouldn’t be needed)

          • The Magpie says:

            That would be the job of a dedicated reporter working for a responsible, community minded and wide awake newspaper, so no, not in the sense of any public media site that The ‘Pie knows of.

            And let’s be clear about this: the coppers are doing their job to the bets of their abilities with what resources they’ve got, they are not off eating donuts and chatting up sheilas in the street. The problem is and always has been part soft idiotic magistrates, and law makers in Brisbane. And they wonder why police recruitment is down.

          • Rotten Luck Willy says:

            Disagree in part. Helicopter can loiter at distance undetected by the snots while maintaining observation, directing assetts on the ground to block or intercept. Dangerous suburban high speed pursuit would not necessarily be undertaken.
            Night sun would be an excellent tool to track snots on foot and again direct assetts on the ground.

          • The Magpie says:

            Let’s hope you’re right.

    • Ben Rumson says:

      Got a link?

    • PRfilter says:

      It isn’t the role of KAP politicians to say or do sane things. All they need to remain electorally relevant is to make it into the papers tapping into the dark and illogical side of humanity.

      Calling in the “big guns” of the army appeals to people at a visceral level even if they know it is stupid and can’t happen. So people walk away with a positive impression of the Mad KAPper without them having to actually achieve anything.

      • The Magpie says:

        In this instance, only those people who don’t think things through. A stupid idea at every level.

      • Sergeant Gunney Highway says:

        The army is more than just a militarised force that is trained in weaponry. The Army can also install law and order, arrest, repeal, and subdue. An Armies response to these little lawless shits is a great idea and one that should be explored. Members of the armed forces can extract information, dish out punishment, and physically contain these kids without the restraints that the Police face such as body cameras and cameras in police stations.

        • The Magpie says:

          You have revealed two things about yourself, there, Popgun … you are living in the wrong country, and there is a good chance you are clinically insane … in a dangerous way. Or else, as we all suspect, you just like talking while playing with your todger.

          • Sergeant Gunney Highway says:

            Dear Magpie, insanity comes in many forms. But you are probably correct my feathered friend. As for whether I am in the wrong Country, Australia is my home in between postings. It’s during my postings that I am able to express myself freely and engage in law making activities that are desperately needed from a military perspective. Thirdly, yes, I do play with my todger, but what male doesn’t?

            In case I am unavailable for future contact, I wish you all the most seasonable wishes and look forward to keeping your Xmas safe. SGH

          • The Magpie says:

            If Australia is your home, then we may rest safe in the knowledge that your eagerness to don the jackboots of military dictatorship will never, ever happen here, Your Highwayness.

        • Alfred E Neuman says:

          Mr. Highway,

          You are a superb jester trying to get a reaction from the readership. You are a good comic but a way to go to before the Melbourne Comedy Festival.

        • Grumpy says:

          Stealer of Valour – where are you suggesting that military personnel gain the power to arrest, detain or interrogate Australian citizens in Australia?

        • Alahazbin says:

          As long as army personnel are trained in those fields and the Federal Government authorise.
          Remember this is not some South American junta.

          • The Magpie says:

            The chances of ANY Australian federal government – even under a Morrison or a Howard – would never ever ever order such an action . There are probably laws governing armed insurrection and the like but they would not apply in this instance. And if it ever did come to that, there would have to be a major inquiry into the failure of the state police force’s inability to cope – which would obviously look at the laws supporting rules of engagement and subsequent sentencing. And Queensland certainly would not want that.

    • PoliWatcher says:

      He may have lost the plot, but on social media it would seem he has a bucketload of support from community for it.

      • The Magpie says:

        But that doesn’t translate into votes here in Townsville when the Mad Katters have zero chance of becoming dominate and call any shots.

        • PoliWatcher says:

          The only real weapon minor party and independent MPs have is their ability to lobby; and that’s what Dametto does. Does it have an impact? Well, I guess that’s up for debate.

  55. Charles Darwin says:

    The Dick brothers, Milton (not to be confused with the monster of the same name) Federal Speaker and Cameron (wing nuts), soon to be Deputy Qld Premier, are proof we are descendant from the apes.

  56. Mike Douglas says:

    Dick and Miles Townsville media Dick did all the talking . No mention of the hard work local MP,s Les , Aaron , Scott . Who is taking bets Jan 2024 both Aaron + Les will get the tap on the shoulder . Spielcheque , clearly you arnt up to date with Governance or Conflict of interest as we have a Mayor who is paid by the LGAQ who in turn receive a % from Council local buy suppliers whilst not doing competitive tenders . Then theres awarding Council $ to companies / entities the Mayor is a board member of . $600 mil Council debt with Council budgeting a $3.45 mil loss in 2023/24 . How many years will it take the ratepayers to pay off the debt after Team Hill have retired ? . 20-30 years .

    • Prince Rollmop says:

      Mike, also worth mentioning is that the TCC CEO is complicit in this Council’s woeful affairs. He has been hobbled by the bullying Mayor and he has balls the size of an ants. A part time worker milking $600k per year to do nothing other than set the city backwards while focusing on his own personal business needs. ‘Council affairs, what Council’??

    • Spielcheque says:

      Mike, if you really mean what you are saying about “Governance or Conflict of interest”, you could make a report:

      “If your concern or complaint involves maladministration – which means administrative action that is unlawful, arbitrary, offensive, improperly discriminatory or taken for an improper purpose – or misconduct by a public official, you should contact The Queensland Ombudsman.
      The Queensland Ombudsman investigates complaints made about state government agencies, local councils and public universities.”

      If complaints have already been made and subsequently dismissed, then you have to accept those decisions. If no complaint has been made, well . . . . . what are you waiting for? BTW, I suspect that Stadiums Queensland (and its Chairmans Lounge) would come under the umbrella of ‘state government agency’.

      • PR Filter says:

        As you no doubt are completely away SpeilCheque, the Ombudsman can and does routinely dismiss frivolous or vexatious complaints which seem generally to be those brought by citizens against government agencies or politicians.

        The Ombudsman’s office has become both politicised and weaponised by the current government and actually serves as a trap for unwary people.

        A nice try, but I suspect Mr Douglas might be a bit smarter than you give him credit for.

      • Alahazbin says:

        Is that you Prins?

  57. Prince Rollmop says:

    From Fran’s Facebook page;

    No information given

    Yesterday at the Full Council meeting I asked the Mayor the following questions:

    1. Could she update the community on the progress of the Business case for the Concert Hall?
    (The tender for this business case was awarded in April 2022 and was expected to be completed in June this year)
    2. Could she update the community on the North Rail Yards project?

    The Mayor provided no response to the content of my questions.

    • J jones says:

      She’s not going to win an election on Facebook and she needs to start promoting her policies, not just questions to the mayor.

  58. Ralph says:

    Pie, I live in the Kirwan area and since around 3pm today I have tracked and watched the Rescue Chopper flying around, it’s now 5.20pm and the chopper is still tracking a stolen vehicle, this chopper idea I’m afraid may not work if what I’m witnessing at the moment is going to be the normal chase, I’m thinking the pursuit policy has to change, it’s now 5.25 and the chopper is still hovering around, I’d like to know what this is costing.

  59. Prickster says:

    Time to reread this https://www.ccc.qld.gov.au/sites/default/files/2020-01/The-Shepherdson-inquiry-Report-2001.pdf with Smiley in the top job and an interesting choice for the head of Premier’s Department

  60. Rotten Luck Willy says:

    From the ABC News website:

    Mr Miles also signalled plans to unlock more housing in south-east Queensland and committed to looking at a new police helicopter for Townsville to tackle youth crime which he said is “unacceptably high”.

    This is good. Naturally with the helicopter we will need enough air crew, maintenance personal, or contracts and most of all training. Training of the new Townsville air-ground co-ordination centre staff and training for the police on the ground in working with rotarywing assetts. This will take time and money. I don’t know about the money, but Townsville residents cannot afford much more time.

    • Alahazbin says:

      No need for a flash chopper like the rescue on, just a couple of R22’s or an R44. Much cheaper.
      Maybe they can call a tender for out of work muster choppers.

      • The Magpie says:

        That’s an idea that won’t -literally – fly, Ala … safety concerns surrounding these relatively flimsy choppers would be paramount, as well as the inability to carry all the top-notch hardware in PolAirs. And given this little arsesoles and some of the bigger one’s who organise violent street protests elsewhere, it is likely and desirable that like American police ‘aerial platforms’, their undersides are heavily reinforced against gunfire.

        • Crime wave says:

          For the same cost of a helicopter they can afford to keep the so called 10% of recidivist offenders behind bars 24hrs a day for 10 years straight and still end up with money left over for a couple more squad cars that need replacing. Priorities

          • The Magpie says:

            That is in fact, in The ‘Pie’s view, a sensible suggestion – at least from the fiscal viewpoint. One wonders if Premier Smiley will make KPIs a requirement for the choppers continued deployment.

      • Rotten Luck Willy says:

        I don’t think an R22 can carry one of these necessary pieces of kit as well as the suit of day/night optics/recording and radio equipment.

        Product Description. The Spectrolab SX-16 Nightsun® is a high-intensity (30-40 million candlepower) searchlight located on the LH side of the helicopter. The light and gimbal are mounted using a quick release dovetail assembly for fast, tools free installation and removal.

        • The Magpie says:

          One of those little … one of the few can read … little snots will note that down for reference. We now await the story on the arrival of the chopper, and soon afterwards, the story on the disappearance of the Spectrolab SX-16 searchlight from its no-tools quick release dovetail assembly. They won’t even have to threaten someone for the keys.

          • Jeff, Condon says:

            Just dreaming, but what about an old Iroquois with a forward projecting minigun and manned M60s at the sides. Hmmm, hope Nick Dametto isn’t reading this.

  61. Shooters party says:

    How sad it is that police shoot a man running at them with a cane knife in Bowen but don’t shoot at the multiple cars being driven into police cars at high speeds endangering the lives inside but not a shot fired. And we all know that these drivers are also carrying cane knives and other weapons so why aren’t police shooting and killing these low life scum. There not worth anything and know exactly what they are doing as opposed to the mentally ill man that’s dead. Bullets are cheaper than prisons

  62. White Mouse says:

    The Astonisher does it again. Page 6 has a story about Townsville’s “A-listers” quaffing champagne and caviar at the opening of Ardo, while the opposite page features people lining up for food at a community pantry.

  63. Achilles says:

    Trying to enjoy the test cricket in WA, but the inane commentary of Justin Langer, is giving the mute button a workout!

    Its no wonder the team rebelled against him, he could talk under water, unfortunately he probably thinks he could walk on it too.

    • The Magpie says:

      The ‘Pie hears ya, Heel … in recent years, I have watched many sports, cricket, RL, AFL, lawn bowls (seriously) and what little soccer to be bothered with ALL on mute … can always switch on for a snippet of information or confirmation of something or other. One of the great freedoms among many of living alone.

      • Achilles says:

        Yep! we’re on the same page, BUT shussshh, if the thought police read this, we’ll be persecuted for some absurd act of imagined discrimination.

        Doubly so, if we happen to criticise a commentator from a minority group.

        • The Magpie says:

          The ‘Pie will no longer be able to go one better and watch one particular program without sound or vision – which was his favourite way to watch The Drum. The final episode ever aired on Friday, and it won’t be back next year.

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