Jenny Hill Finds More Rakes To Tread On … The Latest Has Hit Her Fair In The Arts.

She’s floundering.

No doubt about it, Mayor Mullet is in panicky survival mode. Events during the week have confirmed that she now has real and justified concerns about her own survival.

And The ‘Pie reports (or as The Astonisher would say EXCLUSIVELY REVEALS), Deputy Doo Dah Les Messagebank Walker is about to be down the tubes for a cool $17,000 … he just doesn’t know it yet, but will when he reads this.

And the  mayoral candidate who asked for the Magpie’s opinion … and got it. (No, not Sam, he copped his a few weeks ago, and has bounced back vigorously enough to have The Mullet rattled.)

And over at Conspiracy Central, TRRA’s Peter Newey flouts his organisation’s own constitution and goes all political … declaring an allegiance that any sensible ratepayer would shun …

And Quote of the Week goes to a NT Youth Court judge, a clear-sighted bloke we should immediately bring to Townsville.

And a couple of crackerjack tweets and emails.

But first …

It Was Inevitable

Townsville is now hosting some corona virus suspects, but look, The ‘Pie isn’t going to waste much timed on giving his opinion of the overblown reaction to this nasty version of ‘flu, it would be of little interest and even less value.

According to ABC North Queensland, The Ann Roberts Dance School is the first place to be affected. Thisn posted mid afternoon Saturday.

The ‘Pie notes that the Dance School’s Commercial and Production Manager, Andre Reynaud, is an occasional traveller to his home country France, usually with his wife, School principal, Jane Pirani. The ‘Pie who knew them some years ago, wishes them well.

The ‘Pie now eagerly awaits TEL’s Little Patty O’Callaghan’s claim of the work behind the scenes they did to bring the virus to Townsville … they claim everything else, why not this?

Now It Really Is A Race … Mayor Mullet Thinks So Anyway

A couple of weeks ago, Jenny Hill was skating along complacently, maybe a tad worried for a couple of Team Hill candidates, but feeling secure that her 60%/35% majority last time around would see her safely back in the Walker Street plush.

A couple of weeks is a long time in political campaigns. Jenny Hill is clearly lacking local back room brains in this campaign – unconfirmed word is that a Brisbane Labor bod is supposedly helping, proving the old adage good help is so hard to find nowadays. Local Uber campaign smarty Dolan Hayes has wisely stayed out of this fray, spending most of it on hols in Asia. On recent return, a trusted reader tells The ‘Pie he immediately got a panicked plea from Tony Mooney to a to do a bit of fund raising for a Mullet TV campaign. That turned out easier said than done and was largely a dud, according to some Magpie business mates who were approached, seems everyone is gun shy when comes to donations because of Belcarra laws of disclosure. Bizoids felt this might affect their ability to do business with the council in the future.

But such a late call to boost campaign coffers was a clear signal that Her Smugness was starting to get clammy armpits (now try and get that image out of your head.) The campaign started to wobble when the mayor unveiled her ‘thousand dollar rates rebate’ for new home buyers, a WTF inane attempt at vote catching which was instantly met universal social media scorn, indignation and outrage. Just a small sample.

There was also the revelation (here in this blog) that she had recruited her daughter, a Brisbane council employee, to attack (troll) those who criticized her mummy, but under a false name … which was so dopily done, she was quickly outed with great derision.

Hill was clearly suffering from her oft denied close association the Palaszczuk government and its disgraceful performance regarding juvenile crime in Townsville.

So she clearly floundered around to find an issue with traction, and somehow decides that top of mind in this city is … a performing arts hub.

The most interesting thing there was that the Townsville Bulletin and reporter Madura ‘Teabag’ McCormack openly shot holes in the announcement. And why wouldn’t they, it was as rubbery as Beyonce’s bum, and really said nothing new. It also included matters that had already been done and areas being already covered by TEL.

And it was astonishing indeed to see the Townsville Bulletin writing this in a news story:

“If elected, a Team Jenny Hill majority council would create a “fighting fund”- dollar figure unknown- to attract “national and international events to the city through a new “Townsville Events Board” that would work with Tourism Events Queensland, this despite the existence of Townsville Enterprise, which is funded as a regional tourism organisation to do this.”The next council would work to “lock in” the hugely successful North Australia Festival of Arts and Northern Fringe festival as an annual event- which it already is, as announced by the council in August.

Her brainwave campaign statement did nothing more than prove for the past 5 or 6 years and that through a lack of vision, transparency and honesty, Mayor Hill has presided over a city of lost opportunities.

In the article, Mayor Mullet promised ‘…a sod will be turned on the Arts Hub project next term if I am re-elected.’ The ‘Pie reckons, madam mayor, the next sod to be turned will happen when in two weeks time, when you are turned out of office and we try to rebuilt this community on which you have wreaked so much havoc .

Classic Case: If Sam Gets In, He Won’t Have Won Office – She Will Have Lost It

She is clearly rattled, especially since, at long last, her only real rival Sam Cox is starting to find some of the necessary mongrel to fight a political campaign. And the paper is giving him more and more space, as well as the Astonoisher suddenly finding some journalistic moxie to openly call Hill out on her tiresome excesses and thought farts. And Cox is really cutting through with his TV interviews and his Facebook posts.

While this seismic change was taking place, last Wednesday, guess who decided to butt into our Townsville council election? No doubt in a frantic hope that other candidates would play silly buggers, local Labor sent out a questionnaire asking where candidates stood on certain issues. Nice Try, dept of: The collated answers, if anyone was stupid enough to supply them, would be skewed to suit. A couple of excerpts from the covering letter.

The dumbness is jaw-dropping. There will be those who think The ‘Pie carries on a bit too much but this is exactly the sort interference in our local council affairs that has bedevilled this city for years.

Noting that there are no endorsed political teams of note (forget the New State whackos, more on them in a moment) Sam Cox had a crisp answer when quizzed by the Magpie about what answers he might give.

” I can’t believe one of the major parties is so publicly interfering in Townsville local govt elections. Does anyone, anyone  really believe the Mayor isn’t Labor’s candidate, official  or not? Does anyone really believe they’d be happy to see myself or one of the others elected? I’m not a  party member so I  won’t and don’t have to answer this rubbish, but I  really really can’t wait to see how Cr Hill answers them. “

Neither can we, Sam, neither can we. But we’ll never know what she has to say … it will be Commercial In Connivance.

The Magpie’s Modest Proposal

Taking the lead from Jonathon Swift’s A Modest Proposal which caused outrage and amusement when published in 1729, allow The ‘Pie to offer a local modest proposal (but doesn’t involve Mr Swift’s idea of The Irish eating their babies.)

Why doesn’t Townsville elect TWO mayors?

No, no, come back here, don’t leave, come back and just listen.

Jenny Hill to be mayor of the CBD, and Sam Cox to administer for the vast outlands of the city which are so foreign to Mayor Mullet? That way, the ordinary, everyday citizens out beyond the money sink hole of the CBD would get a fair shake of being looked after, with swift road repairs, sensible rubbish disposal policies, a sensible water plan involving recreational use of Ross River Dam, refurbishing and reopening the Riverway Arts Centre (which The Mullet will close if re-elected) AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, run a sensible rates base used to ensure their suburbs don’t look like Detroit Down Under.

In the CBD and immediate surrounds, Jenny could rate her constituents separately, and also stump up all ratepayer contributions to TEL from her own consultancy-riddled enclave, since TEL is largely disconnected from anything practical to do with anywhere beyond the north/south railway line. Or anywhere really.

Not in any way denigrating the struggling, indeed dying businesses in the CBD, but if the C of C has been timorously happy have their lips super-glued to the cheeks of the mayoral arse, then let THEM answer to their poor bloody benighted CBD businesses who are members of this increasingly pointless outfit.

Well, He Did Ask …

The ‘Pie received a missive during the week from mayoral candidate Chris Eastaugffe, running for the North Queensland State Alliance. He sought The Magpie’s opinion on an open letter he had written to all other mayoral candidates. It was a long screed about corona virus and asked what Mayor Mullet had done to prepare us for its inevitable arrival. Chris got so carried away with his statistics, analysis and questions for the mayor, he completely overlooked to tell what his proposed measures would be.

The Magpie, as always, is loathe to share his opinions of others with others heh heh heh…  but nevertheless, he selflessly gave Chris the requested benefit of his view. The ‘Pie posts it here as part of his election matters of note.

Hi Chris,

Thanks for the copy of the letter, it is generally factual and makes us aware that although not affected yet, Townsville, along with virtually all other Australian communities will eventually be affected, either by cases or prevention measures.

That said, I think the letter is very misguided in terms of the current election campaign, and is a very poor strategy indeed. No one in Townsville is focussed on Corona at this stage, especially in the middle of an election campaign where as an issue it is hardly on the radar – sad to say, about the same level as a ‘new state’ agenda in a local government election. 

Overall, your platform so far has not resonated anywhere that I can see, and that is because of your, and Peter’s, basic strategy flaw that a new state agenda, reflected in your team name, is an issue that overrides more pressing and immediate ones, and detracts from the failings and the flaws of our current council and particularly our mayor.And by running NQSA candidate Fran O’Callaghan in Division 10, you have offered Walker a chance of re-election by possibly dragging away votes from Asti Poole … and out your way, getting rid of Walker should be an absolute priority. But since you are involved in the Woodstock matter, votes from any sensible view that should go to Poole will be siphoned off to Ms O’Callaghan (no personal criticism, all your hearts in the right place, but it seems you haven’t thought this through sufficiently.)

The same applies to your mayoral candidacy … personal association within the community there will garner you some votes that could prove vital to Cox in what is shaping up as a very close contest. So in the end, Chris, your candidacy may well be pivotal in seeing Hill returned. Not your intention, I know, but wasn’t this ever weighed up in preliminary discussions? (Peter) Raffles (head of TSV NQSA) is no fool, but his well-known one issue agenda perhaps blinded him to certain political realities. And it is not for the people of Townsville to make a ballot box sacrifice to such an agenda. And one thing they don’t want are elected people in Walker Street wasting time on a new state issue that will detract from them running the city at it’s optimum efficiency.

I have also read your ‘policy statement’, which is not a policy agenda but a behavioural promise only, and a motherhood statement at that, pledges that would be the very least that a sensible citizen would expect from their elected representatives.

I’m sure this is not want you wanted to hear, and please understand that I applaud anyone who takes the time to put themselves forward, but more consideration should’ve been given to broader outcomes and the suitability of the team agenda on a local government election.

Regards,

Malcolm

Mr Eastaughffe was gracious in his reply, which began with a flattering ‘I got what I expected – a truthful summing up., and followed up with some polite relevant points.

Maybe you’re too nice to be in politics, mate.

But You’ve Got One Unexpected Admirer, Chris

Possibly not the sort you really want, but nevertheless, old Pete Newey at the Townsville Resident’s’ and Ratepayers Association likes the cut of your jib.

However, Mr Newey’s admiration comes with some pretty tricky questions for him.

One small detail in the closing of the letter from Mr Eastaughffe caught The Magpie’s eye.

Regards

Chris Eastaughffe

Mayoral Candidate

NQSA Townsville

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/chrisNQSAforTSVmayor/

Authorised Peter Newey, Shaw Street West End, Townsville.

But hang on, Pete, it says in your constitution:

‘We are also a member of Transparency International and we are not politically aligned.’

Now, Pete, you cagey old duffer, don’t you come on all huffy, and say you were simply authorising the publication of Mr Eastaughffe’s letter on a site where you are grandly known as The Facilitator. In any political context, ‘authorised by’ carries certain legal implications and understandings in ordinary, everyday usage. It means you authorize statements by Mr Eastaughffe

You see, we all as individuals can make whatever statements we like about politics and politicians, and espouse whatever cause we choose, within legal boundaries.

But the support of an association is somewhat different, and each and every person who is deemed a member of such an association is seen as holding the view of any political support. And each and every person shares any legal responsibility for matters that may arise therefrom.

And it is kind of startling to read what Mr Newey thinks constitutes membership of the TRRA. This from the Association’s ‘constitution’.

MEMBERSHIP. In addition to our network of regular TRRA collaborators, informants and contributors, those who choose to become a ‘follower’ of TRRA’s Facebook page are also deemed to have elected to become a member of the Association.

So if someone violently disagrees with you and contributes a comment or in the case of The Magpie who once in a weak moment of giving you oxygen, made a jest on your site, is considered a member?

If that is case (and would be a hot court dispute about its validity) what happens when some of your tin foil hat conspiracy theories are finally challenged by someone who finally finds them just too tiresome and outrageous? What’s that you say, that old boast you’ve often made that they won’t sue because you’ve got no money? Maybe not BUT YOUR MEMBERS, WHO ARE EQUALLY LIABLE FOR WHAT IS SAID ON THE TRRA SITE, DO HAVE MONEY. And they most certainly could be enjoined in any court action, even if you haven’t a cracker.

All dangerous and highly irresponsible, Peter, you should be ashamed that your private obsessions and ramblings, put the well being of other unwitting parties at such risk.

Messagebank Will Be Getting The Message

Interesting few private whispers have intrigued The ‘Pie for a while now, and now a Deep Throat has confirmed them.

If … and it’s a big if … Les Messagebank Walker gets back in in Division 10, it is certain he will no longer be deputy mayor – a position elected by fellow councillors. They’ve finally wised up to the man The ‘Pie has described for years as the laziest councillor of the past two decades. Councillors believe he hasn’t carried out his Deputy Mayoral duties in a fit and proper manner, or often not at all, and they’re fed up with him. The ‘Pie’s Deep Throat says he has preferred to concentrate on his division … which will come a bloody big surprise to Division 10 residents, whose calls he never returns, especially at Woodstock and those affected by the now quashed expansion of the construction rubble industry near residential streets in Wulguru.

Les’s work ethic (when there are no cameras around) can be summed up by his record as the TCC appointee on a North Queensland sporting events body back in Mooneytime of the noughties.

This outfit (cannot recall the precise name) held eight meetings during Les’s tenure as as Townsville’s representative, to discuss the locations for upcoming events.

And how many meetings did Les Walker attend?

Not a single one.

But this lazy dullard still picks up the public shilling without so much as a blush briefly colouring his myopic face.

But there is a price to pay for those who are neglectful of their duties, and in Les’s case, that will be $17,000 a year, that being the difference between the pay of an ordinary council drone  and the deputy mayor.

Of course, that difference no doubt has everything to do with the frantic scrabbling behind the council chamber skirting boards as others jostle for the position. Frontrunners are said to Mark Molachino and Russ Cook. But you can bet the ol’ potty mouth Margie Ryder will be in there boots and all if there’s an extra quid to be had.

The Magpie’s projection: if the Mullet gets back in, Ann-Maree Geaney would probably get the mayor’s backing, but then, Jenny’s track record with other powerful women might mitigate against it.

No matter what happens in two weeks, The ‘Pie’s gunna have some fun for years to come.

Quick Question

Why don’t cannibals eat politicians?

Geez, have you ever tried to clean one?

We Need This Judge In Townsville … NOW!!

Northern Territory Youth judge Greg Borchers is a breath of judicial fresh air, and just the sort of bloke needed in this city.

The story, from Alice Springs, tells itself.

Youth Court judge Greg Borchers sentenced the 15-year-old to two months and 14 days in jail — suspended after five days — after the boy broke into a local business just 10 days after appearing in court for an earlier burglary in 2018.

In sentencing, Mr Borchers said the boy had refused to obey his mother and grandmother or go to school and as a result was “totally uneducated”.

“You cannot read or write and your chances of getting a job are negligible,” he said.

“I am not sure whether you have been encouraged by your family not to value school but you have reached a point in your life at the age of 16 that you are unemployable and that your prospects in the future are only receipt of some form of government benefit.”

Mr Borchers described good behaviour bonds as “ineffectual”, saying between 70 and 80 per cent of youths handed one by a court went on to immediately reoffend.

“Asking a young person who is not subject to any regulation in their own domestic life to obey the law is a farce and it proves so and the statistics prove so,” he said.

“It is important in my view, regardless that this is a youth court, that the authority of this court be imposed upon those that believe it is nothing more than a joke.”

That sentence was appealed on the grounds that the grub’s mother wasn’t in court for the sentencing – yes, really – but the Supreme Court dismissed the appeal, but did quash the 14 days bit.

Judge Borchers sure ain’t the flavor of the month in some circles in the Top End, and he has outspoken form. He caused a storm in 2017 when he told an aboriginal mother that she probably ‘ abandoned your kids in that great indigenous fashion.’  Enough to make Tarquin and Jacinta in South Yarra choke on their soy almond milk latte with a cinnamon twist.

Let’s do a whip round and get Judge Borchers over here pronto.

Best Typo Of The Week Comes From The New Daily

Nearly kicked to death by a mule?

Best Tweet Of The Week

It’s a coincidence, but the best tweet of the week goes to the aforementioned Ann Roberts School of Dancing.

Don’t know if it’s occurred to you, but all those tedious ‘Vote for the best of … ‘ space fillers in the Bulletin aren’t just space fillers, they are low level emotional blackmail often linked to the pester power of children. This mindless stuff can only be voted on by subscribers to the digital online Bulletin … this is a nationwide ploy by all News mastheads, to bolster flagging subscriptions, which affect the advertising rates.

When this one appeared …

… the kids at the Ann Roberts Dance School were having none of it … the politeness of the putdown made it even more devastating.

Why The Corona Virus May End Up Be Great News For The USA

… because it may be the long sought downfall of Donald J Trump.

The criminal indifference and outright lies from the Tangerine Anus before he was dragged kicking and screaming to declare a National Emergency may even be a wake-up call to the knuckle-dragging hard core of his support base. Nothing like a death or two near you to change your vote. But if that’s what it takes, they will not have carked it in vain …

Had to love it when Trump described ‘national emergency ‘ as ‘two very big words’. For once, he probably wasn’t lying. The ‘toonist’s had their usual field day, with a few barbs at the squabbling Dems thrown in.

In The US Election, It Will Be Walking Frames At Two Paces

Questions about Joe Biden being yesterday’s man, given to unfashionable and old fashioned saying like ‘gee wilikers’ and his mildly (next Trump) salty naughty language is nothing new, it is just that no one took much notice of him  when he was in Obama’s shadow as Vice President. That is the usual fate of VPs, but there was the occasional generational jibe.

This was one of the funniest ones from a gentler era (all of five years ago).

And To End On A Local Note

A touching domestic scene taking place in lounge rooms across Townsville this weekend.

……..

Just two weeks to go, plenty to talk about, even more to think about, so when weighing you’re your vote, perhaps keep in mind this from NYT columnist Maureen Dowd.

“The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.’

Comments are getting pretty willing at times – great fun – why not join in, just pick a name (NOT someone real) and say what you think. Even The ‘Pie doesn’t know who’s saying what. And the old bird is still in the midst of planning an upgraded site with a few bells and whistles to make it a better weekly read for you, but these things cost money (yes, I was surprised too), so if you can help with the new jumbo size digital toilet roll we call Nest Mk ll, the donation button is below.