Electoral Fraud By Another Name: Because It’s Legal Sure Doesn’t Make It Right. It’s Another ‘Fuck You, Townsville’ From Brisbane.

Crisafulli is determined to get two things: rid of Thompson and get his boy, Dametto into the Walker Street mayoral playpen.  He has engineered Joe McCabe to gull the gullible councillors into voting for a ‘mail in only’ vote  for the mayoral election. The Premier continues to turn his back on the city that started him on his trajectory to the top job.

Why a postal only mayoral election is wrong: The ‘Pie makes the case.

The Townsville Bulletin, desperate for people to forget its dereliction of duty last time around,  attempt ‘virtue  rebadging’  a campaign of what they are supposed to do anyway. Making out that fearless reporting is a new virtue that they champion, the paper has in effect confessed its deplorable shortcomings. Unsurprisingly,  nothing has changed  so The ‘Pie has a wee suggestion or three.

The ghosts of Thompson past are returning to haunt his loopy candidacy for another run at the Con of the Century.

Leighton ‘Clayton’ Smith – the reporter you’re having when you’re not having a reporter – has had a moan in a personal email to The ‘Pie, wringing his hanky over the old bird apparently ‘misrepresenting’ his work methods.  Then more or less proves the Pie’s point.

And is the US, Trump makes his biggest miscalculation yet, a clanger that is likely to play role in ending this ignorant ego’s rule. But alas, how many times have heard that before.

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Fucking Voter Fatigue?!? What A Bloody Cheek: Who The Hell Does Joe McCabe Think He Is?

The Thinker? TCC CEO Joe McCabe

A psychologist? A doctor? A sporting coach?

Whichever you think you are, Joe, you are none of the above … you’re a vastly overpaid public bloody servant. And chief among what is NOT among your duties is  to usurp the democratic right of Townsville voters to a full and transparent vote on who should be our next mayor.  Who the hell are you to decide on the nebulous social diagnosis that we’re ‘suffering voter fatigue’?  You offered no feedback or anecdotal evidence beyond the usual PS-beloved statistics devoid of relevance to a unique situation. And anyway, if we are a bit fed up with voting so often, it is none of your business and none of your remit to make decisions for supposed financial reasons on what is the community’s right to decide.  If we’re so tired of elections, that we haven’t the will or energy to attend a polling place on a designated day to vote our choice oƒ our next mayor,  then we’ll either not vote or protest with a spoilt ballot.  BUT THAT IS OUR DECISION TO MAKE, NOT YOURS. And if we have a valid reason for not being able to do so, we will then use the valid method created exclusively to cover such circumstances – it’s is called ‘a mail-in vote’.  And physically going to the polls is a social tradition, where everyone gets a feeling for the mood and tenor of the election. And this one would have mini-festivals breaking out all over the city.

Your back-up reasoning Joe – a postal v full election cost differential of $250,000 – was the ideal honey-trap for skittish councillors, worried about possible public perception and sentiment.  Voting NOT to spent an extra $250k was a no brainer, eh? It was also a no-spiner, too.  It all had a risible hollow ring to it, you being the administrator of a council that continues to fling money at Lansdown, approve elitist idiocy of a massive half a million dollar loss on a crockery exhibition that was a loser from day 1, and despite cutbacks, continues to funnel ratepayer money to often corrupt festival organisations and already rich sporting outfits like the Cowboys.  And you continue to featherbed your internal staff numbers, a process in which the councillors do NOT have a say.  All of which are contributing factors the turmoil, frustration and public rage of the past 18 months.

And you argued for and recommended a a postal vote?

Sure, you don’t vote for those matters directly, but you come to the chamber with a respected and traditionally influential recommendation on issues.  That is while you and your executive are not trying to wrest away the average ratepayers right to representation in the affairs of the city.  So here, Joe, is what The Magpie is pretty bloody sure what happened, based on very solid information from southern sources that have not be wrong in the past.

First up, forget the deliberate canard of the Katteronics gaining greater traction in Townsville. Wrong party,  folks.

A movie waiting to be made: The Kid and The Katteronics.

Crisafulli is smarting (just a bit, not too much, it’s only Townsville up there) from criticism about not even inquiring (although not directing) why a lackadaisical CCC investigation has meandered along for over a year, a matter that seemingly even Visually Impaired Fredrick could be adjudicated on in half, or perhaps even a quarter of that time.  We say seemingly, because even if the arrogant knobthrottlers  at the CCC ever deign to release their findings – which would itself raise questions about the foot-dragging  – we will never really learn why we have had to pay an out-and-out moral degenerate a quarter of a million dollars of public money to do nothing and make fools of everybody.

So the Premier wants to make sure of two things.

1. Give Thompson no chance of winning even if he is not disqualified (there’s still a hope of that in a sane world but QED unlikely).  A postal only vote will make campaigning harder, giving the cashed up and social media savvy candidates a distinct advantage.

2. But Crisafulli has proved he is no score-settling rearview mirror operator, and he sees an even more satisfactory possibility. He can consolidate the LNP foothold now established in a hitherto mainly Labor bailiwick by shoe-horning in his choice for Townsville mayor.

So in the Brisbane back rooms, redolent with the smoke of Romeo y Julieta’s and Courvoisier fumes,  either a deal is hatched with the Katter Party  or directly with the career-stalled Nick Dametto. In either case, Dametto will be Crisfulli’s main man in the north if he wins the mayoralty.  No matter that it would for the foreseeable future, tie Townsville’s fortunes to the whims of the LNP.  So Nick has been tapped, and we now await to see who the LNP will run in Hinchinbrook. The strength of their candidate a clear clue to the deal. Will The Kid run dead in his hometown so the Kattertonics keep the seat … which isn’t much, but enough to be handy somewhere down the track.

And this is where you, Joe, got a whisper in your shell-pink from Brisbane that the unusual step of a postal only ballot would be in the interests of everybody, especially those poor voter fatigued citizens who just saying ‘anyone but Thompson’.  Which, strangely enough, is the sentiment that eventually gave us Thompson when we were saying ‘anyone but Hill’.

So Far, The Choice This Time Around Is Hardly Appetising.

Not that you’d know it from the weekend Astonisher, running standard, unquestioning guff as candidates pop up in the paper’s thigh-slappingly stupid ‘No Bully’  series of interviews.  With not a single question asked,  except an implied ‘Hey, can tell us how great you are?’

This silly branding of what is in fact piss poor journalism – the blind sort of selective jingoism that the paper practiced to let Thompson in unchallenged last year.

The weekend edition featured two of the four declared candidates, Greaney and David Kippin.  In both cases it was a free kick for both candidates, as have been anodyne campaign puff pieces from Dametto and Patel during the week.  Seems reporter Josh Mercer hasn’t been around very long, so The ‘Pie is happy to help out with some suggested questions for both Greaney and The Kipper (who these days,  by crikey, looks more like a whale fresh from the abundant krill patch  than a kipper).  And Josh, these questions might assist you in ensuring the paper this time fully informs voters of their candidates backgrounds.

Let’s look at The Kipper’s core claim to suitability that you have quoted.

Mr Kippin said he knows as much about the city of Townsville as anybody and would bring a strong financial background to the position.“In my time at Townsville Enterprise, a 34 year career with NAB, I’ve sat on lots of boards, I’ve sat on boards across pretty much all sectors of the community, social welfare, suicide prevention with Oasis,” he said.

Ahem.  what’s that bit about ‘… in my time at Townsville Enterprise…’ ??

Perhaps Josh, you’d like to ask David Kippin about this from your very own newspaper in 2013.

But it wasn’t his fault, he tells us in that story, he was just a victim of circumstance.

Mr Kippin said he was disappointed to be leaving TEL under such circumstances but hoped his successor would be able to take the organisation forward.

“It wasn’t the script I would have written, but it was written for me,” he said.

“The last three years have been some of the toughest Townsville has ever had and they just happened to have been during my time at TEL.

So zero accountability, and no mention that something else might have played a part in his firing … he had just awarded himself a million dollar per annum multi-year contract … or at least tried to.  Local businessman and LNP figure John Bearne is said to have had something to do with Kippin departure (might be wrong about that) but it would be interesting to know what he thinks of the man not up to running TEL now wanting to be mayor.

But hey, things move on, so what else has the Kipper been up to for the past 12 years. Well one of the latest gigs is or was CEO or similar of the  Weststate Private Hospital, on the western fringe of the CBD,  which, at last report, was bogged down in a legal and financial mire.  Seems 34 years in the tightly controlled parametres. of the banking world with NAB, a failed stint at TEL,  and bring paid to sit on sitting on boards across the community (but achieving what?) hardly supports claim in this weekend’s paper

And the councillors thank you for judgement they are financial and mathematical fuckwits sorely in need of your masterly knowledge. Really, David, give it a bloody rest, will you?  And another big possible downside to a Kipper mayoralty is the likely appointment as mayoral adviser of the political wannabee and booze-bloomed ranting misogynist Max Tomlinson.  Max has been touting the Kipper for Walker Street for a while now, but it would be highly cynical of The ‘Pie to suggest the man fired by Senator Ian MacDonald for misogyny has his eye on a nice little sinecure on the ratpyers purse.

From Low Ranking Public Servant Gofer To The Mayor’s Office – A Fairytale For Our Age

Ann-Maree Greaney is having a run at the crimson robes trimmed with possum fur with wallaby scrotum tassels for one reason only … she thinks she deserves it. All those years running around as a council gofer, erecting portable tables and raising umbrellas needs some sort of reward, doesn’t it?  Jenny Hill obviously thought so, tpping her for a councilm spot, knowing someone who wouldn’t rock the pirate ship SS Mullet. And Mrs Greaney seems to think that we have moved on from her knifing of Paul Jacob for the acting mayor’s job (we haven’t, sweetie, as you’ll find out soon. enough). So, if you’re still with us here, Josh, there’s just one simple question you should ask Candidate Greaney: Madam will you unconditionally promise as mayor that you will never support installing parking meters on The Strand?

A yes or no would  be nice, but unlikely.

The Bulletin Is Still Using a Sledgehammer To Crack A Nutcase

And technically, the paper gets that wrong, too.  The AI he used to draft some idiotic threat to the premier wasn’t fake,  it was actual AI, the fact that he sent AI words in under his own name doesn’t make it fake AI.  It just proves he’s a fuckwit.

Bit philosophical,   so moving on …. electorally, he’s dead and buried, but the paper is still simmering over being fooled by this mentally disturbed galoot the first time around, and have relentlessly ground him down with his own lies. The danger here is, ironically, the Astonisher may concentrate so hard on Thompson, they will be lax in their coverage of other candidates (cf above).

But it’s not just the Astonisher putting in a well deserved boot,  during the week Channel 9 raided its archives for the famous head-kicking he received on A Current Affair to include in a report  casting doubt on his latest claim to be a cancer victim. Even if he was, does he think this is a reason to vote for him? What a plonker.

There is a funny, much lauded local fb page Townsvilleans Who Have Been Blocked By Troy Thompson which is often hilarious, often sad, but one Townsville reisdent as resorted to an old style blocking of Thompson himself.

The ‘Pie can just imagine a door step conversation.

(knock knock)

Resident: Yeah, wadda ya … oh, cripes what a bushy beard, and mate love the hat with the corks on string. Anyway, wadda ya want?

Bushy Beard: I saw your sign and thought I’d have a word. I’m Barry Birnbrauer, and I’m running for mayor.   Just wanted to say if you vote for me, you’ll help make sure that low mongrel Thompson doesn’t get back into office.

Resident:  Yeah, well, your foolin’ no one, mate, I’m callin’ me dogs.

Bushy Beard: MICHEEELLLE,  start the car.

Lighton Smith Has A Blub

The ‘Pie cannot fathom why, but Astonisher stenographer Lighton Smith is a tad miffed by the old bird. He sent in a personal email this week, which I’m sure he wants me to share.

A long standing Magpie prediction moved a major step closer in the past week.  It was inevitable.

The ‘Pie has long worked out the logical end to the Trump blight, mentioned here in passing a couple of times,  and the week just gone has proved that his prediction is closer than we can hope ….  this single photograph appears to be proof of what is to come.

US Military Brass Listen To Trump In Stony Silence.

The silent contempt, the utter opprobrium  that met Trump when he exhorted the US military hierarchy to act against their fellow citizens by using what he termed lawless American cities as training grounds for troops was unmistakeable. Even this brazen two-bit chiseler was visibly taken aback, saying the silent, unmoving reception was new to him, he said his crowds were normally cheering and waving the flag.  That is because his normal crowds are ill-educated, mentally fractured fuckwits.  Generals generally are anything but. But even for this near illiterate moral degenerate, the writing on the wall was plain to read. This may ultimately prove to be his biggest error of judgement.

Here’s how it’s going to happen.  Americans and the world will suffer further indignities, deprivations and threats from the Orange Abomination,  until he makes one fatal move: he will try to abolish elections. (If you snort and scoff and mumble ‘rubbish’, then you just haven’t been paying attention.)

It is then that the generals will finally step in.  And in the greatest irony of all time, they will do what Trump has exhorted them to do … take action against Americans in their own country, something specifically prohibited by the Constitution. But this time, it will be against a would-be dictator  Trump and his cohort of co-criminals. There will be a new, orderly efficient and controlled January 6 raid on the capitol.  But it’s unlikely the generals will want to keep power, they will want to return it it’s rightful owners, the American people.  After a time as brief as it can safely be,  new elections will hopefully restore orderly government, one that with luck is with less corruption and Big Daddyism that has been the norm even before Trump.

With any luck, Trump, hiz egregious family and his closest conspirators will face firing squads for treason.

The social media reaction to Trump miscalculated grab for dictatorial power was swift and glaringly accurate … President Bonespurs, a draft dodging Nepo boy, aided by a minor TV bumkisser turned defence secretary,  telling the men and women who had put their lives on the line in the service of American democracy that they lacked the warrior spirit made a lead balloon look like a FA/18 fighter. It is a credit to the military discipline in the room that the stage wasn’t stormed. Social media was quick to sum up.

The bumoptious effrontery of the entire ploy was topped by nancy boy Hesketh telling generals they had to lose weight (personally) and ban beards, among other things.  That was a gift that could not be refused by any cartoonist. One thought it was a good idea for a different reason.

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From The Week’s Comments

Tony Abbot’s Wet Dream

A Northamptonshire  farmer kisses his winning ‘Biggest Onion’.

Or is he about to do a Wingnut Abbot on it and take a bite?

Well, Guess A Man’s Gotta Do What A Man’s Gotta Do

TCC Clr Andrew Robinson

Don’t know if Clr Andrew Robinson is going to have a run for mayor, but it seems he could do with the extra money. Has he been reduced to doing a bit part in ads for the BWS boozarium? I mean, that IS him, isn’t it, at 14 seconds and in the final scene in this ad.

…………….

That’s it for the week, but somehow The ‘Pie gets the feeling the fun’s just starting. Stick with us, comments always lively. Donate link to help with blog costs is below.