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The Magpie

Sunday, January 20th, 2019   |   112 comments

The Local Government Godzilla: Should The CCC Be Taking A Closer Look At The Money-Grubbing Activities Of The LGAQ?

But even if the CCC isn’t bothered, you should be. The Magpie has a beak around to warn of actual or threatened raids on the ratepayers’ piggy banks with money-spinning schemes that really benefit no one but the LGAQ itself.

Also, a look back down memory lane at solicitor Barry Taylor’s efforts to bring to Townsville a business urger who is now awaiting sentence next month for corruption connected to the Ipswich Council. And not unrelated, in a moment of clarity, The Magpie realises that this sorry episode was the catalyst for Taylor’s pathological hatred of the old bird, which continues to this day with a spiteful legal vendetta. The ‘Pie will explain how it all fits.

Some sobering statistics about the real Real Estate situation in Townsville, with some graphs the Bulletin is too coy to share with you.

And for those who enjoy our now regular Trump gallery, A BONUS … a few select pictorial comments on Britains Brexit fiasco.

But first …

Even Buffoons Can Occasionally Be Funny (as The Magpie Knows)

There’s been a lot of huffing, puffing and posturing about Clive ‘Colonel Blimp’ Palmer during the week. First there was the hissy fit by some over Palmer’s text message saying if he gets back onto the parliamentary plush, he will move to ban such political texting as this.

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The Magpie got one, and the old bird’s instant reaction? Roaring laughter. Let’s give Ol’  Lardarse a couple of brownie points – the text is one of the funniest, and surely intentional, jokes of the current election campaign. Unsurprisingly, there was instant babble about hypocrisy which came thick and fast from the pompous chatterati navel gazers, but the ‘Pie will take his laughs where he can get them, and salutes whoever thought up this one for Palmer’s doomed campaign (possibly someone called S. Sokolova, who authorised the text for the UAP).

In fact, doomed causes seem to be a recurring theme this week for Clive, who announced he was giving a dinner dance for a select few Towns-villains to celebrate ‘Titanic ll – the return of the legend’. Sad when someone has to promise free food and booze to get them to just turn up. And the general feeling is whatever sort of guest selection process that was bubbling around behind the Palmer brow, if you didn’t get an invite, then you were not considered of merit or value to Clive.

Palmer invite

But when it became known amongst our movers and shakers who was in and who was out, it was a matter of do we laugh or cry … was it a hot ticket, or a hot potato ticket, to be dropped immediately? Being favoured by Palmer is something many would like to be quiet about, but then, neither is being left out of a fabulous free food fight, one’s ego can be buffeted by such neglect. Many would have loved an invite if for no other reason it have the unlikely option  to RSVP ‘sod off’.

But Bentley for one believes it will a unique experience, with special attire for dancers.

titanic ball small

The highlight of the night for Clive will be when the adoring and grateful throng gather around him to sing what he will think is a fitting tribute to him, a rousing rendition of the Titanic hymn, ‘Nearer My God To Thee’.

What Starts Out As A Good Idea Doesn’t Always End Up That Way.

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The Local Government Association of Queensland has been around since 1896, and for the most part, has been a valuable and necessary lobby group for all Queensland councils.

Councils pay an annual fee to belong to the LGAQ (Townsville pays around $250K annually), membership is voluntary but all 77 Queensland councils are members. In total, they pay $35million annually in membership fees. The smaller outfits get value from matters such as insurance deals and other areas where the Association’s clout can be brought to bear.

But about 10 years ago, under the leadership of former Townsville council executive and now the Association CEO Greg Hallam, it was decided that there were more lucrative fields in which the Association’s leverage with such a captive (albeit voluntary) membership could be used to build a significant commercial operation. Put simply, the organisation decided to become commercial entrepreneurs.

Greg HallamScreen Shot 2019-01-19 at 9.08.50 pm

LGAQ CEO Greg Hallam

And boy, did they ever. Figures for 2016 show there was a massive bump in revenues, jumping from $46m to $73m, a goodly chunk of this coming from their commercial procurement arm Local Buy (that includes the $35m membership revenue). In simple terms, Local Buy has screened and listed (for a fee) various businesses from across the state, all of whom can then by-pass the tender process and submit direct quotes for contracts to any of the 77 council members. On the face of it, this saves councils money in avoiding the costly procurement work of tendering and so on. But it also sounds like an invitation to corruption on a grand scale. The ‘Pie has no evidence of or suggesting there is, such activity, but looking at the process,  there doesn’t seem to be a foolproof safeguard against some expensive jiggery-pokery if someone wanted a new spinnaker for the yacht.

But does it save councils money?

Local Buy is anything but since it opens up work to the whole of Queensland, often bypassing truly local businesses in the highly selective process which requires a fee for ticking the right boxes (literally, apparently). Local Buy takes a cut of the contract amount of the winning quote usually 10% but The ‘Pie is told sometimes more. Of course, since this is all above board and known, what do the quoters do? They of course factor the 10% in and add it on to their quote, in many cases wiping out any significant savings for the council involved, as well in some instances, as denying many a rate paying, money-spending locals a job . This has caused a great deal of angst here in Townsville, whose mayor is a $32K plus a year LGAQ director, and whose sidekick (now on what seems permanent leave), Stephen The Screaming Midget Beckett, is reported to have had loud abusive outbursts with local business people who have complained about the situation.

And to what end is all this? There’s a great deal of money flowing into the coffers of the Association, and they aren’t shy of shouting themselves lavish overseas jollies disguised as work studies. Why does a lobby group want to be so entreprenurial? Do they want to reduce council membership to zero on the user pays basis (yeah, right), or some witty cynic might suggest, as a lobby group, for a bribery pool? (Just a joke, Mr Hallam, put down the phone.)

But there is a more troubling aspect to this arrangement, apart from freezing out local contractors and permanent local workers rather than special workforce brought in for a set amount of time before disappearing back wherever they came from.

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If you care about strong local voice in Townsville’s affairs, it would well to be wary of a crowd called Propel Partnerships, who appear to be getting into bed with the LGAQ. Propel’s buzz-word blurbs try to disguise their activities by describing themselves as a ‘shared services company’ and pepper their media releases with such euphemisms as ‘fully integrated customer services’; Propel Partnerships is simply a profit-driven, out-sourcing business. Current (or possibly former by now) chairman Jim Soorley, that old Labor stager from way back in Brissy, had his mate Carl Wulff, the then CEO of Liverpool Council in Sydney (now awaiting sentence in chokey for bribery in the Ipswich scandal) enter into an agreement that has ended up with the NSW Crime and Corruption Commission.

This sort of thing can cost local jobs and introduce a totally remote, sometimes hostile letter-of-the-law approach to dealings with staff and with the local community in such areas as rates, payroll services (shades of Qld Health yikes!) and licensing. And not a chance of a face-to-face session of negotiation.

This is an extension of the popular Big Brother move in business, a model that even further removes the public from reasonable (and reasonably expected) interaction with their council.

To understand what happens in both these centralisation scenario,  one need look further than the dear old Townsville Bulletin, which has been so savagely ravished by Rupert’s money-hungry minions and sloppy reporting staff directed from Holt Street in Sydney, a paper which hilariously subbed in NZ, Mumbai, the Phillipines or Brisbane. Of course, one attraction for councils in this model is that it does away with the necessity of either engagement or accountability with the people who elected them or provided their jobs.

This is the rapidly emerging tip of a massive iceberg, with Greg Hallam and his board deciding rather than try and fight off a competitor in an money-sinkhole business battle, instead join forces and share a cut of a captive pie. This is obvious when Hallam gave this ringing endorsement :

“The work of Propel Partnerships ensured that councils were able to realise efficiencies in their operations while remaining in touch with the needs of their communities. I’m confident that Propel has the right formula to bring success to any local government wanting to have the best customer service,’ he said.

This type of service clearly does no such thing as ‘remaining in touch with the needs of their communities’ – quite the opposite . Mr Hallam’s self-serving ideas of ‘best customer service’ and that of the general public may widely differ – laughably so. Saving money, especially public funds, is in most instances an admirable goal, but in this case, it is just another legalised rort of dubious value: and it is actually doubtful that the average ratepayer gets a single cents benefit – there’ll always be reasons found not to lower rates and charges. So be wary of this sort of further alienation of individual communities by the robotic, rorting remote control of more aspects of our lives.

More Lessons To Be Learned From Post-Pisasale Ipswich

Before we leave this subject, check this out.

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Those figures are mind-boggling … and it could easily happen here unless we are on our toes – after all, before his downfall, Pisasale was lionized by Jenny Hill, who said she wanted Townsville to be more like his Ipswich. It probably is, but the CCC just hasn’t found out about it. And this sort of lark dovetails nicely with the cold, callous ‘restructure’ advocated in the Jenny Hill-0commissioned Nous Report.

And boy, hasn’t that Ipswich decision put Hallam’s panties in a bunch. The LGAQ chief seems somewhat spooked by the Ipswich scandal coming so close to home,  and used Trump’s favourite trope to discourage any close examination of local government in Queensland.

LGAQ Ipswich

That mentioned ‘head’ is of course Hallam, and it could be said, on the evidence of other corruption in councils, that the word ‘pinhead’ could also apply to him. Maybe the CCC might start taking an interest in the LGAQ and all those tens of millions. Now that would be interesting.

Historical Snapshot: Barry Taylor And One Of His Mates Yesteryear

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On the left, the bloke that looks like his got the loser of a cat fight on his head, that’s the Carl Wulff that was Jim Soorly’s pal at Liverpool Council before Wulff headed north to Ipswich. And of greater interest to us here in the ‘ville is the bloke on the right.  That’s Wayne Myers, a seriously well-connected go-between linking corporate life to a number of movers and shakers in the Queensland ALP. Mr Myers has pleaded guilty to corruption in connection with the Ipswich council – he has admitted he facilitated bribes to go to his co-offenders who have also pleaded guilty. He will be sentenced next month – when we’ll see just how well connected he is.

But here’s an interesting little bit of nostalgia … Mr Myers is no stranger to Townsville, or to legal fee gouger Barry the Legal Foghorn Taylor.

Barry Big BazzaTaylor

Back in the early noughties, maybe 2004, Meyers rode into Townsville with the hope of siphoning a good chunk of public money into his “community telco” business, which was being driven out of non-performing mining minnow Rennison.

It was a classic case of the Mate’s Economy. Myer recruited local Labor fundraiser and Mooney confrere Barry Taylor to corral a bunch of bizoids into his boardroom to hustle the dollars. Each chipped in $20k (including apparently Mrs Foghorn – more on that in a minute) and then Myers went about trying to convince His Radiance Mayor Mooney that the ratepayers should (1) chip in an interest-free loan of $250k,  (2) $20k of straight-up equity, and (3) commit to a long-term deal for all of the Council’s telecommunications needs to the new company.

Tony Mooney

As things transpired, His Radiance, in his pre-meltdown years, had the good sense to have the matter properly researched by his then IT chief Anthony Wilson, who quickly nixed the deal offered by Myers and Taylor. Despite a lot of ‘aww, c’mon, mate, old buddy, pal’ entreaties, Mooney said no. In fact, The ‘Pie was told that Mooney thought the whole thing ‘a bad joke’. The deal on the table was a dud. Myers’ model guaranteed fees to Rennison first and before anyone else; would have delivered sub-par service and cost outcomes to Council (Council could and did do much better); never budgeted for a repayment of the proposed loan; and didn’t have a cent of interest for Council.

Poor old Richard ‘Spiderman’ Ferry had become the chairman of a local business he knew nothing about. He was left carrying the can, when the business model proved a failure. There is no information about what happened to any monies that may have been handed over, but you can bet Bazza put in a bill for any legals.

What Myers (and Taylor, who must’ve surely twigged to what Myers was up to – if he hadfn’t twigged, doesn’t say much for his legal or business radar) tried to get away with was an arrangement where Rennison re-sold Optus Services to NQ Telco, and took a clip. Too many layers with too thin a set of margins doomed the activity from day one.

Myers went on his way, and Bazza carried on his hosting of other southern white shoe brigaders and their dubious schemes, notably the disgraced fraudster Craig Gore (currently fled to Sweden in the hope of avoiding jail on multiple charges of financial fraud), who risibly said he would put in a canal estate in the duck pond in front of the casino. Considering what happed later with Port Hinchinbrook, Townsville really dodged a bullet there when that all fell flat, but no thanks to Mr Taylor.

But All This Has Led To A Personal Revelation For The ‘Pie

The Magpie has never fully understood the seething animosity that has driven Taylor on a vendetta against him that continues in the courts to this day. Barry on several occasions over the years, had threatened to sue me, but was never able to say for what (he was drunk on two occasions). Of course, he was all hot air at that stage because Bazza was never brave enough in his bluster to take on News Ltd, for whom I worked at the time. When Peter Gleeson came to town, he was in Barry’s pocket even before he arrived, with his wife pre-promised a cushy job with Enema Legal.

I was puzzled that a boisterous boofhead like myself could attract such venom. At one stage, Taylor had Gleeson direct me to delete a quite harmless mention of him he had heard I was to include in the Magpie column (the comment simply said he had bought a multi-million dollar property in Noosa, and Barry said it could damage his reputation in Townsville – his what, you laugh?) … that was only time any editor interfered in any of my opinion columns for personal and not legal reasons. In that incidence, Taylor sent in a handwritten letter which Gleeson showed me (appalling writing and grammar) that strangely said that I was waging a campaign against his family. I didn’t, and don’t know his family, and quickly proved in the paper’s computer system that I had mentioned Taylor a total of 7 times in 8 years, none of them derogatory. I mentioned his wife in passing once … when I wrote that she was the director of a company THAT HAD PUT $20k INTO A DUBIOUS TELCO BUSINESS WITH THE COUNCIL! Nothing illegal or even untoward was suggested, except that I didn’t think it was a good idea.

So there we have it.

That must have been the start of it all, Baz not only being caught out in the subsequently failed telco venture, but that  I had revealed he had inveigled his missus to whack up some cash as well (through a company of which she was a director, as I remember). Totally harmless, just a bit of local gossip, but somehow, Barry became as jumpy as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

His bluster continued down the years, including threatening to arrange a boycott of Michels restaurant if they didn’t drop their advertising on this blog. (They did drop the ads, he was a valuable albeit much disliked customer, but were happy to let me keep the couple of hundred they had paid.) And so it goes on still, he talked poor old Rabieh Krayem into suing me for alleged libel, knowing full well that I have no money or assets to pay 100th of the ludicrous $300,000 claimed.

Well, Baz, hatred comes at a cost, because you didn’t reckon on two highly principled and incensed lawyer friends who offered to defend me because they cannot abide bullying, especially legal bullying – like trying to spuriously involve my daughter on a technicality in matters that don’t even remotely concern her. That alone was a clear measure of your craven behaviour and that of the ninny Venesa Gleeson (Typo’s wife) – as a mother herself, you’d think she might have some scruples, but alas, she will use the Hitler excuse ‘I was just following orders’ – least the Court of Appeal has chucked out that bit of vicious nonsense.

Rabieh, make sure you have it in writing that Barry is doing this for nothing for you, and that it really, as a mutual friend told me, ‘purely Barry’s show.’  Otherwise, those Nudgee fees for your two lads may well end in up in the Taylor bank account in Noosa.

The Townsville Property Market Will Be Hunky Dory In 2019, Says The Astonisher.

As the Hotels Combined teddy bear says on telly ‘Really? Don’t believe everything Mr Convincing tells you’.

David Lynch 3

Since the City Economist, David Lynch, seems largely silent, here’s a chart showing building approvals for 2018 (December numbers not available yet). The data is from the Council’s own website.

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One could do some extra work and show the comparisons for the previous year, or two for that matter, but why take work away from Lynchy.

To summarise: to the 11 months, in 2017 there were 641 dwelling approvals. In 2018 there were 432. For those numerically inclined that’s 209 fewer or 30.2% less in number. And gee, I thought the stadium was going to be the “one catalyst” that would turn the whole show around. The “one catalyst” claim came from none other than the muppets at Enterprise House (where Mr Lynch used to ‘work’.)

And to cap things off, The ‘Pie offers these self-explanatory charts.

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However, the Astonisher persists with its cheery inanities, but raises an interesting pictorial question. One of the spangled cheer leaders of this self-serving guff is this bloke …

Propertyology managing director Simon presley

Propertyology managing director Simon Presley

A ‘propertyologist’ sorely in need of a psychologist – and some serious sartorial advice. Seriously, are you going to believe a bloke who decides to sit in the middle of a busy Brisbane road, with an empty chair next to him to signify that no one else is that dopey. Keep it up, Mr Presley and you’ll soon be joining your namesake.

Captain Towns May Have Been A Blackbirder But …

At least we have tucked his statue away in a discreet corner, but not those right-wing race-baiters up in Cairns. They have even got Captain Cook throwing a big Nazi salute.

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Finally, Not One But Two Mini-Galleries On Overseas Matters …

The first is the Brexit hullabaloo, which is far from over, but has been a cartoonists cornucopia. Here’s four of the best.

image001 brexit 316_220542 Brexit 220_220588 Brexit 1

And That Leads Us Into The Week In Trumpistan

What a difference a few hundred metres makes.

Because of his tantrum induced government shut-down, Trump was without catering services to entertain a visiting football team. So as a man addicted to whoppers, he called in Burger King to provide the food for the boys (he could’ve just as easily gone with Maccas, asking his guests “You want lies with that?’)

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And just down the road in DC at the very same time, there was a food line of Federal employees who haven’t been paid that stretched around the block of this massive federal building.

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So it’s true what they say about America being a land of contrasts. That issue continued to dominate the visual commentary of the week, but the New Yorker knew who was needed to sort out demon Donny.

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And so it goes …

……………..

That’s it for this week, Nesters, and remember that comments run throughout the week, have your say, there was a very lively thread on the council getting involved in the city’s mental health work (some hilarious) and there’s plenty of fodder in this week’s Nest. And The ‘Pie is loathe to say it, but times are a bit skinny in the Nest at the moment, with a few blog bills hitting the deck since Christmas, so any help with a donation would be greatly appreciated. The how to donate button is below.

The Magpie's Nest is now more than five years old, and remains an independent alternative voice for Townsville. The weekly warble is a labour of love and takes a lot of time to put together. So if you like your weekly load of old cobblers, you can help keep it aloft with a donation, or even a regular voluntary subscription. Paypal is at the ready, it's as easy as ... well, easy as pie. Limited advertising space is also available.

112 Comments

  1. Young fella says:

    The Captain Cook statue in Cairns with his arm extended is there to show everyone how high the marijuana plants grow up that way

  2. SPQR says:

    So Clive’s phone message was authorised by S. Sokolova. Must be Russian eh!
    That’s should be sufficient to allege that Clive’s Putin’s puppet, i.e. sufficient for those suffering from Trump Derangement Syndrome.
    Better appoint a Special Prosecutor. Oh hang on, done that. The Special Liquidator has done a great job at nailing lard arse eh!
    Aw c’mon that’s a bit unfair. It has only been 2 or 3 years since appointment. These things take time. Ask Mr Mueller.

  3. Over this Hill mob says:

    The Council budget must be well and truly stuffed. They’ve reintroduced the ‘Recording Change of Owner Charge’ of 52 bucks gouge-fee for ratepayers who lose their partners through death or divorce and therefore their former partners no longer appear on the rates notice.
    I can’t fathom how this gouge-fee could exist considering the rates notices are handled by a company in Victoria.

  4. Gonzo says:

    Pie, I didn’t get an invite from Clive so I was not considered of any merit or value to El Palmo. Whew, I thank the Lord for that. The four Brexit cartoons, and the fourteen Trumpistans, demonstrate that Brexit and Trump have something in common: incompetence. My favourite is Donald afraid of the Wicked Witch Nancy promising to “get you my pretty.” Given the Wizard of Oz theme, it suggests a Donald song: “If I only had a heart.” PS: Take it easy. It sounds like you’re working too hard. But it is a great blog.

    • The Magpie says:

      Sorry ‘work hard’ … another pohrase The ‘Pie doesn’t understand, along with recipes that call for ‘leftover wine’.

      Thanks, Gonza, Swans back flying again soon.

  5. No More Dredging says:

    It’s no surprise I guess that Clive isn’t hosting the Titanic II Dinner, with “minstrels” FFS, at Yabulu as a sort of QNI 2.0 reality show – punters might notice how derelict the joint has become. The thing is, some people seem to believe that the re-opening of the Queensland Nickel plant is just around the corner, at the drop of a hat – just as soon as the Queensland government gets out of Clive’s way. Why do ordinary voters behave this way? Have we succumbed to the dazzle of the Dance of the Flaming Arsehole?

    • Dave of Kelso says:

      NMD,

      ‘Re last two sentences you are right. There are some who try to keep informed, care about the community, and despare at entrenched corruption and subliminal manipulation.

      Unfortunately most folks don’t care, are happily ignorant, and like a moth to a candle are drawn to the shister offering unfunded “cake and good times”.

      What hope is there?

      • No More Dredging says:

        Dave of Kelso, what hope is there? The hope you can have comes from the construction of a new turnpike into the back end of your suburb from the Port of Townsville’s giant Pinnacles quarry. The widening of Riverway Drive may have seemed like a service to long-suffering Upper Ross residents but it’s actually the start of an industrial purgatory, notice of which was given by Council back in 2016:

        “While the nearest residence is 9 kilometres away, the quarry will be subject to a range of conditions to mitigate against potential impacts including noise, dust, ground vibration and stormwater run-off, and truck movements in the local area.”

        As part of the proposal, the port will construct a private road to haul the rock from the quarry onto Riverway Drive, and then to the port via the ring road to avoid utilising Granitevale Road.

        The State Government has also announced $30 million in funding to duplicate Riverway Drive between Gollogly Lane and Allambie Lane which will improve traffic flows for the Upper Ross.”

        This little gesture is needed because round 8 million tonnes of rock will be required for breakwaters and revetment walls for the Townsville Port Expansion. Most of that will be carted 50 kilometres through Kelso to the port on road trains . . . . for years to come, so that we can “get trucks off the Bruce Highway”. Did you get that? They lie straight to your face.

        At last count, every single political party unequivocally supports the Townsville Port expansion. All of them, Greens included. Not one has a hesitation about environmental impacts (at Kelso, along the 50 kilometre haul route, in World Heritage listed Cleveland Bay, at Magnetic Island or at the GBR generally) and not one has raised an eyebrow about the bizarre, laughable so-called “business case” for the expansion which is Trumpian in its fakery.

        • Pat Coleman says:

          Got expelled last year from qld greens for campaigning against CPV cos it perpetuates corruption and telling them where to get off. Because I don’t hold back , letters don’t get printed .

          I have been saying that the business case is the same as the canal estate , strike now while we have a corrupt structure in place and the votes are too tight to refuse to fund it. Of course you can refuse. If you are in favour if it you are corrupt. If you grudgingly go along with orders from your party you are corrupt.

          Being ex military does not save you. You joined the mafia. You are enemy.

          • The Magpie says:

            What have you got against Commercial Passenger Vehicles (CPVs) which includes buses, the drivers of whom tell YOU where you can get off, not vice versa. Sad to say, Pat, many of your missives here don’t see the light of day because The ‘Pie believes there is no collusion between your mind and your keyboard.

          • Pat Coleman says:

            CPV – Compulsory preferential voting

          • The Magpie says:

            Ah!

        • Dave of Kelso says:

          NMD,

          I recall the issue of trucks being discussed some time back but recently it has faded from mind.

          We have our fair share of dump trucks with trailers but, at the moment, they are not an inconvenience.

          Road trains you say. I sincerly hope not. I have see one of them shed a tyre. It could easly be fatal for any road user nearby.

          The private road; do you know the alignment? From the map I can only see it being under the HT power line coming out neat the borrow pit, or via Hammond Way, or Alambie Lane.

          • No More Dredging says:

            Dave of Kelso, yeah, one of those routes, they’ll do whatever suits. Wonder who owns the land along the route from Granitevale Rd to Kelso? Just an assumption about road trains. That is what is being used to cart bulk material to and from the port at the present time – a semi plus two separate 5-axle trailers. With millions of tonnes to move it makes sense to carry 30-50 tonnes per truck journey rather than 20. I’m afraid road users and Upper Ross residents will be the least of the Port’s concerns.

            What we know is that a widened channel will require significantly more maintenance dredging (14% is admitted in the plan) all of which will be dumped at sea in Cleveland Bay. The Port, the State and the GBRMPA all know that constant disturbance of bottom sediments is wrecking the beaches and what’s left of the fringing reefs on Magnetic Island . But what they also know is that it is likely that the impact of sea dumping could be seriously diminished simply by moving the dump site into deeper water (20m rather than 10-12m currently). That requires cooperation between state and federal regulators because there’s a Marine Park boundary in the way. But what’s the point of a Marine Park if governments just wreck the joint anyway. Flaming arseholes!

          • The Magpie says:

            For some reason lost on The Magpie, there seems to be an abundance of flammable rectums around at the moment. What have you started, Dave?

    • Cantankerous but happy says:

      Why do ordinary voters behave this way? Have we succumbed to the dazzle of the Dance of the Flaming Arsehole? This from some gullible dickhead that voted for Jenny Hill, speaking from experience NMD?

    • Concerned says:

      Must be, it would appear that a lot of the ordinary voters in Townsville succumded to the dance of the flaming ALP arseholes directly responsible for Townsville, which have failed us miserably.
      Hill and Puddleduck

    • Over this Hill mob says:

      NMD – Townsville, derelict? With our impressive crime rate without a curfew (i mean c’mon just trial it in 1 high-crime-rate suburb and see how it goes after 3 months), the never-ending line of “leaders” seeking handouts signalling their talent, vision that goes all the way to next year (vision 2020), unnecessary water restrictions (that isn’t written into any policy, just on billboards costing ratepayers’ money), plenty of cyclone shelters in the CBD and along Charters Towers/Ross River Roads with its amply available real estate, CBD median strips that Local Buy Jamie Durie would struggle to pare back (surely he had to be on Local Buy considering Council didn’t tender for services greater than $200K in line with their own policy), and Limited Townsville Enterprise.
      yeah considering all that, Townsville could best be described as “if you’re going through hell, just keep going, because you might get out before the devil even knows you’re there.”

      • Little Miss Muffet says:

        Re: your curfew suggestions. Figure release din the Courier Mail this week would suggest that we don’t have enough coppers available to do their existing duties, let alone enforce a bloody curfew!

      • No More Dredging says:

        Over this Hill mob, the “derelict” reference was to the QN site at Yabulu.

    • Dave of Kelso says:

      The dance of the flaming asshole, hummmm, have any folks actually seen it?

      I have.

      It was in the Other Ranks Canteen at 1 Base Workshop Battalion, Bulimba, in 1973. Saturday night and there was a kerfuffle from the other side of the room when Animal L ( I never knew his first name, always Animal, and I will preserve his family name in the hope he became a usefully member of the community ) was taking of his clothes. Someone was preparing a Saturday paper, which Animal firmly stuck up his ass. With great uproar and support from the assembled, the paper was lit. Ken the Pommy Barman turned off some the the lights. Then it was on!

      With great yelling and whooping from Animal, away he went. Around the room, over tables and chairs, over the never played piano, and around again and again did Animal go. So long he had forward motion, the flames, ever growing larger, did not seem to be a problem, for a while.

      It was a great show that seemed to last an age, but was probably only 15 or 20 seconds, but there you have it. It, so to speak, lit up the evening.

      At some other time I may educate my fellow Nesters how to stop a rotating ceiling fan with your head without injury. Careful technique or you will require unsightly forehead stitches.

      • The Magpie says:

        Sincere thanks for contribution to the sum of human knowledge.

      • I’ll be plucked says:

        And I s’pose they let this flaming arsehole bloke loose with firearms and explosives too………??? Deary me.

        • Dave of Kelso says:

          IBP,

          Will you lighten up a bit.

          It was all in fun, nobody got hurt or offended, and as I recall, he was good at his job.

          • The Magpie says:

            Flamin’ good at his job?

          • Spooka says:

            Yes, lighten up keyboard psychologist, seen it plenty of times in the Army myself in O/R canteens and once in an Officers mess!, all in good fun, a type of stress/frustration relief from hard training to protect people like you. I’ve seen it in Pubs, Surf Clubs and even in public all over Australia for over 45 years, part of straya’s larrikinism bill of rights so to speak.
            On another note, seems like very few people here have had anything to do with the favorite solicitor of the pie, they are very lucky, got me fucked how some people can avoid jail for 30 years or more including Council employees, Businessman/Women and in particular Politicians and Lawyers here in Townsville.

      • Achilles says:

        Shades of the Man from Snowy River?

      • Achilles says:

        There was movement at the station, for the prunes had gone around…etc

  6. whykickamoocow says:

    The Titanic II is a metaphor for our Townsville.
    It’s hit an iceberg (Jenny Hill) and is sinking. Clive thinks he’s the lifeboat.
    But there aint no fairy tale at the end of this movie.

    • No More Dredging says:

      It’s not a metaphor, it’s fake news. Palmer will not build a Titanic II and he will not re-open the Yabulu nickel refinery. Total crock of bullshit.

  7. Mike Douglas says:

    Thou protest too much , Ceo QLGA Greg Hallam advised the media in May 2018 that the CCC enquiry into Councils was a witch-hunt and with Ipswich, Logan, Moreton, Fraser Coast found to have endemic corruption so much for Hallams credibility . Clearly Council tendering needs a review as how do you explain Hinchinbrook Shire Council awarding a $320,000 contract to a NSW,s contractor for design and construct of a toilet block ?. What makes it worse is the Queensland State Government provided the funding so with high unemployment are Hinchinbrook Council saying that no company in the region can build a $320,000 loo ?. Can’t provide a link because the Astonishers reporting goes to digital sign up and the Hinchinbrook Mayors press release conveniently left out the NSW contractors name .

  8. Concerned says:

    It is interesting to see the trends as a result of the Mullets recruitment of senior staff (CEO, and Acting CEO) at TCC.
    When you look at where the Northern Territory and South Australia governments were traveling under the previous ALP flags and where some of the recruited TCC senior staff came from, and you now look at where Townsville is heading.
    Is it coincidence???

  9. Hee-Haw says:

    Pie.
    The Mayor Jenny Hill receives $94,280 per year for her directors role at LGAQ not $32,000.

    PLUS board meeting expenses which includes who knows what in addition

  10. Stillnotalocal says:

    Headline in todays Bullshiten – “MAN DIES IN ROAD CRASH – Cops seek cause of early morning fatality”. Perhaps I am being a bit sensitive as I lost a sibling in a traffic accident but why the lack of respect to QPS? When did it become acceptable for the coloquial term “cops” to be used by our supposed leading media sources?

    • The Magpie says:

      ‘Cops’ being four letters will always feature in headlines in any media unless what is judged as the gravity of the story demands a more formal approach. Besides, the Aussie use of the word ‘cops’ is like the use of ‘bastard’ … it all depends on the descriptors that go with it, as in”Ow yer goin’, yer old bastard’, is a world away – well, maybe two schooners away – from ‘You bin rootin’ my missus, ya bastard!’ Funnily enough, and it may be the Pommy influence, but to The ‘Pie’s ear, the word ‘coppers’ carries more hostile undertones than ‘cops’. Your point is taken, but language moves on, and cops has long lost its sole derogatory, anti-authoritarian meaning.

  11. Kingswood says:

    Sigh, still no invite from Clive in the mail today. How about you Mags?

  12. Concerned says:

    Hey Pie
    I know this is completely of track, but I am sick of seeing it on a daily basis., I am not a racist, but I am concerned for our young indigenous population. When are we going to have a politician and or media to have the balls to come out and and say that we have a real problem in our indigenous populations with crime and antisocial behaviour.
    This can not go on when we are having kids as young as 10 committing serious crimes on a regular basis and the residents of Townsville being held at ransom by kids.
    It is time that pressure was put on these communities and the so called elders to start being role models for our young indigenous kids, to stop the physical abuse, alcohol abuse, drug abuse, and the exposure to these toxic environments.

    • The Magpie says:

      Don’t think there is any lack of awareness of the situation, it is just that no matter what is suggested to rectify the situation, others will block it, often by pulling the race card … which is basically claiming its always someone else’s fault. But The ‘Pie takes exception to any criticism of the ‘elders’ … apart from racists like Gracelyn Smallwood and black Daddy Warbucks plutocrats like Noel Pearson, aboriginal leaders are as much at sea as anyone on how to control their bored, shiftless youth who see no future because the values of a broken violent home do not instil any confidence or trust in getting on in life. Besides, it is wrong to suggest the ‘elders’ carry any responsibility apart from decrying the criminal actions, it is, like anywhere and any society, down to the parents. Blaming the elders for lack of leadership is like holding Jenny Hill responsible for white(ish)crime and corruption … hmmm, hang on a sec – ah, no, we’ll save that for another time.

      BTW, nowadays, the quickest way to be tagged as racist is to use the phrase ‘I am not a racist but …’ – anything said after that is sneered at and seize upon as the proof of the opposite. Just expressing, the frustration of the reality, as you have, even without calling for some idiotic, dog-whistling unworkable solution (like the foam-flecked lunacy of a letter writer called Dillon in today’s Astonisher) will brand you racist from all sides.

      Of all the issues out there attracting attention these days, this one – race and crime – attracts more attacks on free speech – even free reasonable debate without expletives, threats, or even denigration, than any other. And this issue just one in is in the vanguard of many of those issues where we are bullied about what we can and cannot say, and if we are cowed into the position of self-censorship of our what we say , it has been a successful first step in the ‘elites’ telling us what we can think. It would be best for those elites to remember the words of Samuel Butler:
      He that complies against his will
      Is of his own opinion still
      Which he may adhere to, yet disown,
      For reasons to himself best known

      In other words, repressed people will go underground, and express themselves with subversion.

      That’s our brave new world in a nutshell.

      • Concerned says:

        Hey Pie, yes I may have used the wrong term by targetting all elders, I was directing it at the Smallwood, the ones that rippws of TAIHS, and the alcohol smuggling Mayor.

        • The Magpie says:

          Yes, well, Smallwood and Lacey are self-promoting specialists in the ‘aboriginal industry, in fact, when the paper described Smallwood as an indigenous leader, there were many messages of outrage and derision, worse than any white person could’ve said. They’re certainly not elders … almost all the elders The ‘Pie has met are sad, wide but bewildered and responsible people who are just as mystified as we are about that tragic vicious circle previously mentioned. They also retain their dignity, too.

      • Non Aligned Worker says:

        Townsville has a problem (related to a racial minority) that the media and government media releases are unwilling to own up to.
        Young (above mentioned ) youth are out of control in our community.
        Action above and beyond them apologising for crimes committed against the community needs to be addressed.
        The catch and release system currently employed by the state government is obviously not working.
        According to current statistics youth crime (as above) is on the increase despite programmes put in place.
        This is bigger than the Adani Black Throat Finch debacle that Anastasia is currently trying to shift the media focus from.

        • Spooka says:

          For around 40 odd years I can remember Townsville’s Aboriginal youth criminal activities have been a problem. As a former victim of Car theft, break and enter and theft by aboriginal youths it seems the problem will never go away. For those 40 odd years, I watched Police getting pissed off with idiot magistrates slapping them on the wrist, time after time. Police do their job, get to court and a lot of the time watch the offenders walk, an absolute joke, spineless Politicians and Magistrates bending to the “Aboriginality Business” in not only Townsville but nationally has always caused a festering racial problem through perceived favoritism by all Government departments toward Aboriginals. Somethings never change.

          • The Magpie says:

            There is no doubt that the aboriginal social mind-set is and always has been different to western culture. The harshness of their environment instilled by necessity a group sharing ethos to ensure survival and their manner of administering justice, from ‘belly down’ beatings to the ‘featherfoot man’ executioner (brought in from an outside group to maintain internal group (tribe) cohesion) was and is a far cry from the ritual panoply, relative snail’s pace and pomposity of western justice, with its principal of prosecution/defence.
            That recognised, the more pertinent fact remains that less than 3% of the population in indigenous, and many a wrong head in their leadership insist on a tail-wagging-the-dog scenario that the ancient system is the only just one – for them, even if the crime is committed against a non-indigenous person. They seek the same principle as those who advocate the stunted, medieval and heinous practice of Shari law.

            While it is the clear police brutality, borne greatly out of frustration, is shameful racist behaviour which should be severely punished, much is made of the question, why do 3% of population account for 70% of the jail population? No one seems to come up with the obvious answer that it is because members of that 3% COMMIT MOST OF THE CRIMES, acts deemed to be crimes under the laws accepted by 97% pf the community. And are processed through the justice system accepted by 97% of the people.

    • No More Dredging says:

      Concerned, I believe you when you say you are not a racist and I accept that you are sincere when you say you are concerned about this or that group in our society (other than your own) which is in some sort of difficulty or other. It could be African migrants or a religious minority like Moslems or repeat domestic violence offenders or young people who nearly or actually kill themselves with recreational drugs. However, I can’t understand what you hope for when you write:
      “It is time that pressure was put on these communities”. As far as I can see many of these “communities” are already at breaking point. They can’t handle any more “pressure”. Their parents, elders or leaders are unable to command the respect and discipline that we (you particularly) expect and they have told us so, over and over. And anyway, what is this respect and discipline that we project as being our virtues? What examples do our so-called ‘respected’ institutions offer when we see our religious bodies besmirched by sordid and proven allegations of child abuse and organised cover-up, our banks and insurers exposed as liars, frauds and vandals, our police allowing themselves to abuse their secret database to expose vulnerable women and our political institutions, who, for example, request Aboriginal groups to communicate a vision for respect and inclusion (the Uluru Statement) only to simply reject it in a throwaway line by the PM of the day? One way or another we are all part of one or other of these dysfunctional communities. We don’t need “pressure” from those who can’t see the forest for the trees.

      • Grumpy says:

        NMD. Spend a day or two in the Murri Court and you will get an inkling it where the principal problem lies.

        That fat buffoon of a marsupial would be pleased.

        • No More Dredging says:

          Been there, done that. Saw Don Dale on TV too. The language of outrage hasn’t changed in well over 100 years in Townsville and the effect of it has been near enough to zero, or less, given the Indigenous youth suicide rate.

          • Grumpy says:

            NMD – Given that comment, I seriously doubt that you have been anywhere near a Murri Court.

          • No More Dredging says:

            Grumpy, your point is? Perhaps you could give us an inkling of your contribution (in or out of the Murri Court) to the resolution of this “principal problem” about which you know all apparently. So many experts, so little progress.

          • Grumpy says:

            NMD:

            My point, you virtue-signalling, pious prick, is that, had you ever been in a Murri Court, you would know that the primary influencer and arbitrator on punishment is the Elder who sits on the bench with the Stipe. You would also know that custodial sentences from the Murri Court are very rare, due primarily to a reluctance to go that course by the presiding Elder. And I’m willing to bet that you have never “been there” or ‘done that”.

            Your reference to Don Dale is typical of your usual obfuscation and topic-changing, issue-avoiding bullshit when confronted by your betters. What has a soon-to-be-closed and discredited institution in Darwin, FFS, got to do with a Murri Court in Townsville, other than to show what a complete dill you really are.

            I don’t have the answers – but I reckon over ten years sitting beside the little buggers on the left of the bar table gives me some insights and an informed opinion.

            Most of the juvies were completely unrepentant, totally incorrigible and fated to end up in adult prison for most of their adult lives. One thing they had in common, though, and that was the lack of a coherent and stable family unit with moral values and standards of decency – you know them “family values” that the Dullard Wombat abhors so much.

          • No More Dredging says:

            …..which, Old Mate, brings us full circle. Concerned raised a view, way back when, that “pressure” needs to be brought to bear on the families or parents or ‘elders’ of these ‘communities’ to make them reverse what you describe as ” . . the lack of a coherent and stable family unit with moral values and standards of decency”. You seem to have noticed and are happy to observe that the reprobate children of these communities are “completely unrepentant, totally incorrigible and fated to end up in adult prison for most of their adult lives”. You have no answers and neither do I. But I suggested to Concerned that applying “pressure”, however that is done, will be a waste of time, money and community emotional energy – as it has been in Townsville for at least a hundred years. Either re-employ the Native Police, ‘disperse’ the mongrels and cop the flak or look for a different model. The one we have sure ain’t working.

            And get off your high horse about ‘been there and done that’. Any halfwit attending any criminal court in Townsville a few times over and over several decades can see that the youth justice system is at its wits end with the ratbags it has to deal with. “Pressure”, as described by Concerned, whether on the system itself, the ‘family and children services’, the politicians who rinse and repeat or this community (the one we are all part of) hasn’t and doesn’t get us the results we want. The more “pressure” we apply the closer we get to the monstrous failures like Don Dale. If you believe in more pressure then make your case; I don’t.

      • Concerned says:

        NMD, it is time that pressure was put on the so called families of these kids (yes kids that should be in a loving environment and thinking about the positives in life, and all the other things that kids should be thinking about and enjoying, instead of the hostile, voilent, abusive environment many are curretly living in. This is for all kids in these circumstances, but as it would appear by the amount of our indigenous kids being involved in crime in Townsville, it would appear that there is a real issue in the Indigenous family structure.
        It we keep on the same track we are on I do not want to think of the future for these kids.
        The approach by governments HAS TO CHANGE for the sake of these kids.
        And we need our governments to grow some balls and make some difficult calls for the sake of these kids.
        I am not trying to say anything else.

  13. The Magpie says:

    Doesn’t take long, does it?

  14. Capricorn says:

    I see all the bullies at JCU are getting ready to promote themselves. Sack the juniors and use that money to fund themselves. Staff have stopped making complaints because if you do you will lose your job – and you are not taken seriously anyway – so why bother. A dangerous situation is brewing when managers don’t listen to their staff.

  15. One legged tap dancer says:

    Astonisher cub reporter Clare Armstrong has out-tooled the Toole with the misquote of the year in a story headlined “Albanese hints at ring road support” in today’s rag.
    In the penultimate paragraph Ms Armstrong writes: “Herbert Labor MP Cathy O’Toole said infrastructure spending in the region would boost Townsville’s above-average employment rate.”
    So now we know why unemployment is so high – its all those jobs, jobs, jobs Mayor Mullet and her Labor cohorts have been creating.

    • The Magpie says:

      It is either as you say, Jitterbugger, or it’s an accurate quote. We would expect either

    • The Magpie says:

      Interesting point, Jitterbugger, and two things stick out. It may NOT be a misquote at all, but with these two, it would be hard to tell. But interestingly, Prof Pedant here will pompously point out that if The Tool actually said or meant to say’ … infrastructure spending in the region would boost Townsville’s above-average UNemployment rate,’ it doesn’t make sense in English … ‘boosting’ can only mean increasing, and one would not expect greater unemployment from increased infrastructure spending.

  16. The Stockman says:

    The Bulletin online today looks like one giant ad for Adani, i’d be embarrassed if I worked there today. Perhaps QLD labor saw the massive fish kill on the Darling and got even colder feet. Jobs are important, but so is having an environment we can live in.

    • The Magpie says:

      The ‘Pie recognises that any sort of transition presents difficulties, hardships and decisions that require mobility – and doubly so after the spendthrift lack of vision that believed in an endless resource boom (you’d think saving for a rainy day would have real resonance up this way) … but this old bird is slowly coming to the conclusion that we really do need to stop depending digging up our dirt and sending overseas and start actually MAKING something. In a word, the death of manufacturing will eventually be the death of our economy. In our position, a tough, uncompromising stand on value-adding before anything hits the docks should be national policy, and we should call the bluff of economic bullies on the world stage. Of course, this doesn’t apply to coal, bit hard to value add beyond some pointless boutique BBQ briquettes industry, and the coal industry will be wound down by other forces and the march of technology. But we need to reealise this NOW, and stop the lotus eating.

      • The Magpie says:

        Guy you end your post by saying ‘I’ll understand if you don’t allow this in the posts because it just makes people angry and confused’.
        The ‘Pie is glad you understand, but ‘angry and confused’ has nothing to do with its deletion. The ‘Pie is not publishing the post because it is a long ( make that loooong) rambling dissertation of scientific mish-mash which ultimately goes absolutely nowhere.
        The right to free speech does not include a right to be taken seriously, and Facebook is a better place with which to bore people with this sort irrelevance.

        Not up to your usual good standard of comment, mate.

  17. Hondaman says:

    Pie, it’s been quite a while now since the revelation of the missing paltry 23 Million tied up in the Breakwater Trust. Is there any light at the end of the tunnel, or is it due to being technically in the CCC hands? Just curious, it really is a lot of money!

    • The Magpie says:

      Remind us what that’s all about, The ‘Pie has obviously let that one through to the keeper.

    • The real Philip Batty says:

      Hondaman- Is it true that “an abscess make the fart go honda”?

      Seriously on your question re the $23 mill , no one is looking at it, no one cares, my local alderman told me he would look into it and get back to me but surprise surprise nothing, the TCC finance manager told me the method and that the audit had signed it off so nothing to answer the question.

      These people seem to be able to avoid any kind of scrutiny and may I say with the assistance of the state government too.

      • Hondaman says:

        Reference the fart, that only applies to the 4 wheeled type, the bikes sound mucho better! Mr Batty, I recall the 23 million smackers was a write down to zero on some property owned or minded by the Council, and it showed up regularly in the yearly budget, being depreciated etc. Then it just vanished! You were on to it, and as you say it appears gone for all time, though it would be nice to know exactly where! You would probably be the best to bring the old bird up to speed on the subject, I am an interested observer, and like a lot of contributors to this blog hope that one day we may be rid of the toxic culture in Walker st. I’m still waiting for over a year for a response from Les walker on a question I asked of him, which should not be very difficult task from the Deputy Sherriff.

  18. J jones says:

    Can we please get Cairns’ Captain Cook statue and put it in the top of Castle Hill look over to Maggie.
    It’d be a great tourist talking point.
    We could promote helicopter rides around it for starters.

  19. Dave of Kelso says:

    Clive Palmer moving company hq to NZ to potentially access millions of Aust taxpayers dollars in forthcoming dispute with WA Govt..

    Is it, “Make Australia Great”, or “Making Clive Grate”?

    https://www.abc.net.au/news/2019-01-22/clive-palmer-sets-up-kiwi-company-threatens-to-sue-taxpayers/10734744

    • Dave of Kelso says:

      That’s billions, not millions. 45 of them actually. What a charming man!

      • Non Aligned Worker says:

        Clive is playing the game as set down by our laws.
        Anna Alphabet is trying to do the same to Adani but is an amateur compared to Clive.
        Reminds me of Kerry Packers reply to the senate committee when his tax minimisation practices were put into question and didn’t comply with the spirit of the law.
        Kerry said that he felt that he didn’t want to put any more tax into the system because he didn’t feel that the government were spending what they had very well.

        • Grumpy says:

          I’ve seen plenty of clever—dicks “playing the game” and ending up being caught offside. Usually ends up in tears with a finding of abuse of process, or worse, contempt. From what I see and hear, Clive is being given plenty of rope.

  20. Dave of Kelso says:

    Dear ‘Pie,
    Does Warren Mundeen, past Labor president standing as Liberal candidate for Gilmore make him, err, how do you say it; politically transgender?

  21. Hee-Haw says:

    I see Jenny has sent Sunbus to the Qantas corner

    • The Magpie says:

      Sunbus has been on the market for some time now, and the mayor knows it … a change of ownership will make her look like she has shaken things up. She’s a sneaky bugger, really.

      • Mike Douglas says:

        Are things catching up with our hapless Mayor as her attack on Sunbus on 7 local news came across as neurotic . Sycophant Sleuth Councillor Greaney supported the Mayor on Sunbus issues because, “ her son told her so “ .

        • Hee-Haw says:

          Mike the icing on the cake for me was the line from Clr Greaney that people call them (Sunbus) and do not get a response.

          Pot and Kettle anyone?

    • Sam1 says:

      Bit rich Hill complaining about poor service.

      • The Magpie says:

        Wonder when the last time she on a bus, by necessity. She’s a battler’s champion alright.

        • I’ll be plucked says:

          The one you call Mullet said the bus service was appalling on 7 local news last night.
          Ms Mullet, the secrecy, the dubious appointments to TCC ‘executive’ positions, and total lack of respect for open and accountable local govt under your ‘leadership’ is what is actually appalling. Hang your head in shame!

  22. Cantankerous but happy says:

    Peter Newey at the ratepayers association thingy needs to have a long look at what the hell he is trying to achieve, his latest ramblings are bordering on bizarre, talking about Adele Young and the lawyer Navarro attending the Mardi Gras as a couple and therefore linking that as proof of some form of collusion. The biggest worry for me is the fact as the local govt election becomes an issue later in the year, once the federal poll is out the way, media in this town will look to him for comment, it could well play into the Mullets hands, particularly if an alternative Mayoral candidate hasn’t come forward.

    • The Magpie says:

      The Magpie finds Peter Newey’s TRRA posts highly entertaining, and in a metaphorical sense, The ‘Pie’s enjoyment is the same as Mark Twain’s of Cecil Rhodes – “I admire him, I frankly confess it; and when his time comes I shall buy a piece of the rope for a keepsake.”

  23. For Whom The Bell Tolls says:

    Pie, you have appropriated my count down to the next local government election.
    I’ll have to find another thing to count down.
    Any suggestions out there?

  24. I’ll be plucked says:

    Corporal Cupcake, the shambolic state ALP member for Townsville does it again! This time about the bus service in Townsville – he says on 7 local news that ‘everyone’ knows that the bus service in Townsville needs to improve. Well, well Corporal WHY haven’t you DONE something about this in your nearly ‘two terms’ in the seat? WHY? What have you DONE? Nothing, zilch, zero.

    Give it away Corporal – start looking for another ‘job’ now; you have failed the people in the seat of Townsville, miserably!

    • The Magpie says:

      Hey, the other two bozos have done SFA on this issue either, which concerns ALL three state seats … and a mayor who has waited until it has slowly dawned on her that she is really deep in the electoral shit to try and make capital out of her dereliction of duty to the community. If an election were not on the way, we would’ve heard diddly squat about this issue, which has been a disgrace for over a decade now. Insulting stuff all round.

      • I’ll be plucked says:

        Agreed Pie; ALL of them need to be kicked to the kerb at the next elections. Failed and embarrassing ‘politicians’, the lot of them (local, state and federal).

    • Cantankerous but happy says:

      Yep first class dickhead, but the Mullet is even worse, standing there on the news telling everyone how fucked the bus service is, at the same time the council is spending millions ugrading services around the bus hub in Ogden St, what a waste of money that will be, I guess an empty unused building in the CBD will match the rest of them.

    • Plannit Townsville says:

      Recently researching bus timetables, I discovered that Townsville is the only major city (I’m counting Mackay as a major city here) on the Qld coast that doesn’t have a real time bus tracking app that I can add on my phone.
      Further enquiries into this revealed that an app can’t even be built because the buses don’t have GPS installed. Sunbus couldn’t get support from our elected oxygen thieves to fund GPS.
      Additionally route/capacity reviews by the department responsible were years overdue. Other cities had been reviewed due to pressure from local politicians.

      • The Magpie says:

        A good general point, but did Sunbus elsewhere get public money to support GPS installation? Wouldn’t it have been smarter for a stipulation of winning the overall state contract be that the vehicles be fitted with GPS? It’s no massive deal … even the golf carts at Willows (Tropic) have GPS for shot distance and automatic engine cut-off if you drive too close greens and bunkers.

        Surely the Baron of the Bus Hub, Messagebank Walker, is on the job … or maybe that’s the problem.

        • Plannit Townsville says:

          From what I was told yes. Sunbus contracts to the state so funding is from the state. The review is most certainly a state thing. But because our local pollies were busy jumping up and down about stadiums, airports and the like…they completely forgot about how the people flying in, going to the football and living here would be getting around the city….

          • The Magpie says:

            They would get a taxi from the airport, of course, with the fare containing an arbitrary tax for Kevin Gill, for allowing hios airport being so kind as to allow the cabs to service incoming passengers.

  25. The Magpie says:


    How time flies, as the monkey said as he threw the clock at the elephant.

    ‘It certainly flies for the winsome, lose-some, iditor Jenna Cairney. In her iditorial today, she writes:

    “The Queensland Government responded by employing Major General Stuart Smith as a community champion to report back on the crime situation in Townsville. The Major General delivered his report late last year, yet here we are, a year later — our city still under siege from these delinquents”.

    A year later? Err, ‘scuse, ma’am, the diversionary, useless and time-wasting report from the odd-jobbing and expensive Stuart Smith was handed down on December 9 2018, just over six weeks ago, If you’re going start getting your panties in a bunch as you honk on with your virtue signalling, get the little things right, just for credibility’s sake. Fucking up in the iditorial, even to this minor extent, doesn’t do much for the rest of your publication.

    And if you really wanted to serve the cause of fixing this crime epidemic, why not offer each of the three local members half a page in your esteemed (ha!) organ to hear what they think the answer is, and what they intend doing? Now that would be a community service in accountability.

    And good luck with getting them to rise to the challenge.

  26. The Magpie says:

    And just how is this gunna work?

    Sent? SENT!?!

    So are we going to have some jack-boot squad, manning road blocks and demanding ID? Midnight raids to check who is home? And eventually, we will be told that to avoid charges of discrimination and harassment, ALL Australians will be required to carry internal passports?

    The ‘scheme’ apparently involves councils. Does The ‘Pie smell the whiffy iffy aroma of LGAQ in here somewhere? And is the Townsville Council involved in this little bit of fascism?

    Come to think of it, that yarn is a few days old now, and The ‘Pie has been waiting for some details, but like all thought-farts from this government, nothing has been forthcoming.

    • Cantankerous but happy says:

      Right up there with the Mullets dopey brain fart that she could somehow ensure every employee that was going to FIFO to the Adani mine be a resident if Townsville, talk about lala land stuff, half the people living in Townsville now don’t want to live here at the moment, why does this tosser think anyone else would.

      • The Magpie says:

        Used to be a time when someone contemplating a job up here would get a few copies of the local paper to get a feel of the place.

        Sudanese crime gangs seem to a more attractive option.

        • Mike Douglas says:

          The pressure this crime is putting on residents and landlords is compelling . People do their research and won’t rent or buy in high crime suburbs so prices in these drop or stall . Out of town inspection on a friends rental property today the renter wants an house with an alarm system so the owner will have to upgrade current and others bare the costs of installing alarms on top on insurance increases of 3 times cpi .

          • The Magpie says:

            Must say the Bulletin is super helpful, prominently listing the worst suburbs for crime. A great public service, that. Within its pages you can also find out which suburbs have the greatest truancy rate, which one has the most car smashes, worst roads/footpaths, the best pizza and the best pie. hat more could we ask for.

            But we all know where the best pie is, don’t we? hint hint.

        • Dutch Reverend says:

          Careful what you wish for

  27. Dutch Reverend says:

    So now for the really important shit. WTF has the Australian Cricket Board done to the “baggy green” it looks more navy blue and the crown is getting smaller and no longer looking baggy. Travesty, travesty, I say

  28. Tangerine says:

    Went to the city library this arvo for the first time in ages to borrow a book that was available on the web app. Got there and the book was booked by another so couldn’t get it (what a shit system – online all good to go but not the same on internal system – much apologising from embarrassed staff) so went looking for something else but my brain wouldn’t function as fken super noisy pinball machines everywhere. I love pinball. Mispent youth. But in a library? What genius thinks this is a great combo? Our rates are paying for morons … but I guess we already knew that, sadly.

    • Plannit Townsville says:

      So you are complaining about people using a library?
      You miserable arse.
      Getting youth into a library these days is a commendable effort by the staff. Maybe whilst there they will borrow books. It’s unfortunate your book wasn’t available but that doesn’t mean others can’t enjoy the facilities. Libraries are no longer places of deathly silence.

      • Concerned says:

        Well actuallh libraries are a place where you should be able to go in relative silence and be able to sit, study, read, and be able to concentrate.
        Pinballs are not something that you would find in Libraries, and people teying to concentrate, maybe in a pub, or club?

      • The Magpie says:

        yes they are and if not should be. You’re a dingbat, mate.

  29. It's OK to be any colour says:

    I am just so sick and tired of this black arm band rubbish that we have to all go through on Jan 26.

    I have absolutely no apologies to make to Aboriginals, Islanders, Muslims, Catholics, Protestants, Agnostics, Buddhists or any other aggrieved group.

    I am an Australian – let’s get over it and get on with it.

  30. Willy wonka says:

    How wonderful is the bullsheet this weekend. Naming Nick Dametto as the “alleged” drug dealer’s relative. I hope the Katter party or Nick sue’s the shit out of them for defamation. As well as Frosty Mango. This type of reporting is low. How come they don’t report and name everyone who is related to the car thieves and burglars every day. What’s the difference? This just tops off a week of seeing the election campaign by the mayor using the paper as advertising to show how fucked in the head she and her gutless mandated councillors are. The paper should be investigated by the ccc as well.

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