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The Magpie

Saturday, September 2nd, 2017   |   227 comments

Thanks, Mayor Jenny Hill, The Rest Of The Country Isn’t Laughing At Townsville Anymore … They’re Sniggering.

Our hayseed image projected Mayor Mullet could not have been more complete if she appeared nationally in bib’n’braces carrying a banjo. Or on the front of the local paper promoting a darts tournament she has nothing to do with. What on earth did this truly ignorant and vicious woman expect when she calls for a boycott on Qantas?

A local legal man gets the Lazarus Award of The Year with an astounding comeback from professional banishment.

The one Australian The Magpie barracks against …

… and some chuckles from around the media …

Bentley’s on a break.

The Fall And Rise Of Michael Cowen QC

Michael Cowan

Lt Colonel Michael Cowan QC

Mickey Cowen is a hard-nosed hang-‘em-high prosecutor and head of the Townsville DPP. As man who betrays his blunt northern English background with what some – particularly courtroom opponents – find a confrontational manner. But he’s known to get the job done, and has locked up a goodly number of baddies over the years.

But it seems his up-front style got him deep in the legal shit a short time ago.

A few months back, Mike had been tapped to be the next District Court judge to replace the retired John Baulch, and was basically working out his time as DPP head honcho when he went to Mt Isa for his final sessions there.

The way The Magpie has heard it, it was during a break in what by all accounts was an emotional trial that Mr Cowan had some blunt words in a general conversation at the bar table while waiting for the judge to resume. The ex-military man was never known to favour political correctness, and he made some – ahem – forthright remarks, believed to be about the certain figures in the Brisbane judiciary, and more than somewhat chauvinist in tone.  And elements of un-judge-like attitudes.

Unfortunately for him, one of those in the conversation, a legally well connected woman from Brissy, was apparently so miffed that one swift phone call to Brisbane, and the offer of the judgeship was withdrawn tout suite. .Unusual to say the least.

And there matter rested, until two days ago, when it was suddenly announced out of the blue that ‘Lt Colonel Micheal Cowen has been appointed the new Chief Judge Advocate of the Australian Defence Force. He will take up his appointment on September 22.’

Talk about falling on your feet! It would be churlish to suggest he got the Defence offer AFTER  accepting the DCJ position, and maybe hoped to get out of the state gig. But nah, not really his style.

Mickey must be giggling himself to sleep every night. because now, not only is he playing with the ‘big boys’ on the national stage, he atually IS one of the ‘big boys’, taking home close to three times a Queensland DC judge’s salary, probably be given gratis accomodation, and will be provided with a number of spiffy uniforms with shiny buttons and pips to ponce around in.

Enjoy, Micheal, you’ll be right at home in a Canberra winter. Nowt could be better, eh?

More than a former Hong Kong copper on the beat could ever have dreamed of, really.

Random Media Follies

From the Thursday Astonisher

Regetta

A regetta? Sounds like a seasick Italian after a rough race. He very much regetta being out there. (PS that’s where Bentley is swanning around this weekend.)

In the London of yore, there was a big poster on the Express newsroom wall that said ‘Remember, they are all eight’, a reference to the level of language to be used in the paper. One wonders what the poster says in the Courier Mail’s newsroom – maybe ‘Remember they are all idiots’. But just in case, they ‘fessed up that there had been some pictorial surgery afoot. Hooda guessed?

Screen shot 2017-09-02 at 9.35.17 PM

And Paul Zanetti neatly skewers one of Canberra’s biggest self promoters.

Zanetti on hinch

And does Shari Taglibue know something we don’t know … or something that the current airport boss doesn’t know? This from her excellently balanced column (The ‘Pie means it) today.

Screen shot 2017-09-02 at 9.59.42 PM

Trevor? No subs in Mumbai are going to catch that.

At least reporter Victoria Nugent clearly has no illusions about her qualifications to write this week’s cheer-leading stories about the airport swindle.

Screen shot 2017-08-31 at 10.46.48 AM

And a reality check for Ben Bogan’s cheery claim last week that the Astonisher has lifted sales recently.

stack of papers

(L to R) Courier Mail, The Townsville Bulletin, The Australian

The Resounding WTF of the Week

But now we must reluctantly go to the week’s toe-curling embarrassment, which is not so much someone falling on their feet as falling flat on their arse.

Jenny Hill

In a major brain fade, our esteemed mayor Jennifer Hill called on her Labor/union training and tried a touch of bullying that verged on extortion. Of all the daft targets, she chose Qantas. Added to the Boganville approach, her inane suggestion was endorsed and magnified by the Bulletin

kanga front

The repercussions were instant and savage. But first some perspective.

The Ghost Of Mooneys Past Now Stalk The Corridors of Walker Street.

In the dying days of the Mooney mayoral era, history tells us that hubris and an unshakeable belief that ‘Tony knows best’ overtook His Radiance to the point where he really went off the rails on several occasions. And it was all down an overweening self-belief without any checks or balances. As the disintegration became openly apparent, The Magpie wrote in the paper that Mooney needed to follow the example of deified Alexander The Great, who had a minion stay at his shoulder throughout the day and every 15 minutes or so whisper to him’ Remember, you are not a god.’

Unfortunately, His Radiance ignored the advice and the town went all atheist on him when he lost the amalgamation election to Les Tyrell.

But it seems Mayor Mullet, aka Mrs. Jennifer Hill, is sorely and urgently in need of a similar lackey. Except it seems she is happy to believe she is some sort of regional goddess. Growing evidence of this mindset reached alarming proportions on Monday, when she called for a community boycott of Qantas, for failing to act as a corporate tax collector for Kevin Gill and Queensland Airports Ltd and impose a $3 levy on all Townsville in and out bound tickets.

The ‘Pie, ever the conspiracy theorist, wonders if Mrs Hill has shares in the Ashley and Martin Hair Restoring people. Many, including chief Mullet whisperer Dolan Hayes, must be tearing their hair out at such a lame-brained move.

Needless to say, the Astonisher gave the call wide circulation (well, as wide a circulation as a paper with a rapidly plummeting circulation can give), and both parties missing the glaring unintended consequence that such a bumptious call put the community squarely behind Qantas.

Indeed, the reaction was instantaneous. widespread and savage, This is just one typical reply that thudded into the Nest on Monday.

Old Hack August 29, 2017 at 11:32 am  (Edit)

Just read the Mullet’s latest attempt to blackmail Qantas into lining the pockets of her mates at the airport. To me, it reeks of extortion and should attract the attention of the various State and Federal authorities charged with maintaining the probity of local government.She is so puffed-up with self importance she has lost touch with the reality that she is the pissant mayor of a provincial city, not the all-powerful dictator of North Queensland.It’s past time she addressed the failings of her own administration rather than telling others how to run their businesses.

The message there is clear … the airport is nothing whatsoever to do with the council. ‘Wouldn’t it be nice’ sentiments are fine, but that’s about as far as it should go.

And interesting to note that by early AM that day, the Bulletin on-line had 10 comments slamming the mayor, the tax, QAL and airport boss Kevin ‘Rhymes With’ Gill.

The fact that Gill is chair of the Dudley Do Nothings (aka TEL) – his deputy chair is Mayor Mullet – and the Dudley’s main annual fuel is $750,000 of ratepayer money, demonstrates an avaricious disregard for the groundswell growing against both the council and its largesse towards this stumblebum TEL outfit. (Shortest book ever written: The Achievements of Townsville Enterprise.)

A Movie For Our Time: Educating Jennifer

It was on Wednesday that a calm and reasoned Qantas response clearly put our financial and business ignoramus in her place, pointing out the bleedin’ obvious that the mayoral tail does not wag the Qantas dog.

First, we had seethed our way through the usual Bulletin bias (the paper said Qantas believed the $3 was too much to pay … that is simply not true – Qantas maintains that any surcharge for the upgrade of te nature they want should be paid for by QAL. And the paper continues to promote the issue as a ‘stoush’, which is arrant nonsense, heavyweight Qantas has simply refused to get in the ring with featherweight QAL).

Then came the nitty-gritty – prefaced by an observation that should alarm all of us – from Qantas spokesman Andrew Parker. In a letter to Mayor Mullet, M Parker bluntly told her that her boycott call “put services, employment and future investment in Townsville at risk” .

Andrew-Parker

Qantas executive Andrew Parker

As though lecturing a fiscal three year old – he probably was – Mr Parker told the Mullet; ‘“While we are somewhat encouraged by a recent improvement in demand, the fact remains that domestic passenger numbers at Townsville Airport have contracted by 5.7 per cent since 2012. The Qantas Group, like other Townsville businesses, has felt the impact of the region’s shifting demand patterns and wider economic downturn.To avoid any misunderstanding, the Qantas Group is at present operating services to Townsville which are commercially marginal. The route and demand economics do not support Townsville Airport’s proposed capital spend of over $40 million, which is why Queensland Airport Limited’s investors won’t fund the project out of their existing profit pool.”

KAPOW!!!

Mr Parker then provided some gentle advice to our kiddy mayor and her wilful playmates when he said Qantas is “aligned with Townsville’s focus on increasing demand and expanding the tourism economy (but) this can be better achieved through increased marketing and strategic investments in attractions to stimulate demand, rather than overcapitalising on airport infrastructure that will only drive up costs and in turn, airfares,”

For Christ sakes, people END OF STORY, SURELY.

Double Standards Anyone?

In an iditorial, Ben Bogan English displayed the hypocrisy that is a News Corpse trademark. He accused Qantas of not being willing to be extorted because an upgrade would mean Virgin would get a Club Lounge it currently lacks. ‘Qantas are protecting a monopoly,’ he squeaked,

That coming from a bloke who works for a company that used fair means and foul to rid Townsville of two other newspapers, and even cut its own free throw-over because it threatened (they thought) Bulletin sales. Sounds like you’d know all about protecting a monopoly, Bogan.

But What Could Possibly Be In It For Jenny

You don’t have to be a conspiracy theorist to wonder just what hidden agenda is behind this astonishing and despicable attempt to use public office to extort and blackmail a company into unfairly enriching another, all the while putting the mission of her elected office in jeopardy by doing irreparable harm to Townsville.

Try as she might to be otherwise, Mayor Mullet is and always will be Tony Mooney Lite.

Mooney quietly ran his council with iron fist made possible by political smarts, and knew he didn’t have to be too obviously a rule bender, he knew his rewards would come after leaving office. And so it was, with th skillful aid of his media man Dolan Hayes , he scored a lucrative, specially created bullshit position with a coal company, got a few sinecures from the government and now has the featherbedded luxury of chairman of the Townsville Hospital Board.

Jenny seems to think some such goodies will be coming her way when she is turfed out next election. But first of all, she won’t have Dolan Hayes trying to flog damaged goods to his considerable contacts. And if the LNP get up in the coming state election, she can kiss her arse goodbye for any sinecures thrown into the LNP trough.

Sadly, she has none of the political/business nous, contacts or diplomatic charm that would remotely interest private enterprise, since her political base is withering and she is on the nose with business generally.

And another thought. If a miracle occurred and the Labor poo-bahs put her back in favour for a run at a senate or even a state seat (watch out, Coralee) they’d better check her eligibility. Odds are that she retains Maltese citizenship.

Craven Praveen

Dr Praveen Kumar

Dr Praveen Kumar

Dr Praveen Kumar, the de-registered Kirwan doctor is known mainly for two things … he runs the My Family Doctor practice. And he can’t keep it in his pants.

Medical authorities de-registered him after he was judged to have been playing a grown-up’s version of doctors and patients, featuring – ahem – injection procedures. He also has a problem with keeping his temper … what we nowadays prissily call ‘anger management’. He’s due in court on assault charges soon, after a bit of push and shove with his staff.

Well, it seems his valiant attempts to ignore reality and continue his Kirwan medical practice (as non-medical director), fighting with his medical staff along the way,  may have come to end. He was due to be turfed by the receivers yesterday (Friday) despite some creativity with signage out front.

Stay posted.

Nick Off!

Age changes many things, like limiting your proud array of farts to the ‘motorbike trying to start’ and the occasional ‘the haunted house creaking door’.

But the one thing rarely changed as people age is ‘attitude’, they more tend to harden.

But not so for The ‘Pie, who must sadly confess that he has become that most un-Australian of un-Australians … a barracker against his own side.

It wasn’t planned, but during the week he realized he was giving a little silent cheer and a muttered ‘bloody bewdy’ at the news that part-time tennis dabbler and full-time prick, Nick Kyrios had been bundled out of the US Open and subsequently fined $7000 for swearing and smashing raquets.

nick kyrios

This child man, the epitome of spoiled brat (although that other knob Tomic is getting there too), is a bloody embarrassment and should have his passport revoked until he agrees to urgent head surgery.

We have a long and proud history of cheeky larrikinism in Aussie sport, like flag fancier Dawn Fraser and RL lair St George fullback Changa Langlands and his white footy boots (scandalous at the time) but we as a nation draw the line at outright ‘cheatiing’ (underarm bowling anyone, Greg Chappell’s your man?) … and full-blown bumptious public knob-throttling, both on court and in media conferences.

The sooner you nick off from the world stage, the better, Kyrios. And the way your going, that thankfully won’t be long.

Tosser.

The ‘Pie Knows He Really Shouldn’t But …

Seems the world and his wife have their own favorite Rabieh Krayem story, but we’ll save the good stuff up for the court room.

Rabieh Krayem

But one The ‘Pie has to love – and even gave him a temporary liking for this poor Barry Taylor-patsy – is the yarn on which the late Queensland RL boss Ross Livermore used to dine out.

When Rabieh was at the Cowboys, Ross had pressured him to pay some debt or other, to which the Rabster replied the cheque was in the mail (yes, really!). And to prove it, he faxed a copy of the cheque to Ross, telling him this is what is in the post!

The debt never was never paid, (one of many unpaid matters down to Rabieh during his time at the Cowboys, The ‘Pie has discovered) but Ross carried the fax around for the merriment of many a gathering.

The Real Crisis Will Be Over In Three Years

Metaphor fo the week comes from Jennings in the Guardian.

Screen shot 2017-08-31 at 10.36.12 AM

And finally …

A filler run by News during the week.

Screen shot 2017-08-31 at 2.14.53 PM

Top of the list would have to be ‘Ben’, wouldn’t it?

…………………………

Another week, another load fo codswallop. Join in the comments 24/7 and have your say. And if The ‘Pie has caught you in a weak moment, donations are always welcome, look below to see how easy we’ve made it for you to indulge your natural generosity.

The Magpie's Nest is now more than five years old, and remains an independent alternative voice for Townsville. The weekly warble is a labour of love and takes a lot of time to put together. So if you like your weekly load of old cobblers, you can help keep it aloft with a donation, or even a regular voluntary subscription. Paypal is at the ready, it's as easy as ... well, easy as pie. Limited advertising space is also available.

227 Comments

  1. Droopy draws says:

    Seriously, I thought I’d picked up the NT News at breaky today; she does look at home though so I guess if nothing more she could be mistaken for Simon Whitiker’s sister….

    Looking forward to having some time to contribute this week, Pie.

    Nigh nighs… x

  2. Woodduck says:

    Ah yes Praveen Kumar, I refuse to call him a doctor. I got myself a life time ban from his practice after giving him a character reference about his shoddy attitude towards me. Like a typical bully he shit himself, telling me to leave and never to come back. Was it worth the ban? Shit yeah. Keep up the good work pie.

  3. Sandgroper says:

    It’s a real shame that the only current Bulletin writer with (metaphorically speaking) balls is a woman named Shari Tagliabue. Her Saturday take on the airport extortion bid is absolutely priceless, made even funnier by her mention of the very forgettable Trevor/Kevin.
    The editor may have let her initial, sometimes bolshie columns through because he wanted to maintain the facade of ‘balance’ in the paper’s coverage of meatier issues , but I reckon he will have trouble putting that particular genie back in the bottle. Like Maggie Thatcher, I don’t think Shari is a “lady for turning” and if her byline suddenly vanishes her many devoted readers will want to know why.
    Hopefully, the notable fall in readership after The Magpie pulled the pin will give the Bulletin hierarchy pause for thought before they try to rein her in.

  4. rex says:

    Good luck Bentley with the regatta.
    If Vicky is a day dream believer, she’s working at the right office. She should adjust her bio to non fiction writer?

  5. Midnight Unicorn says:

    The Mullet has a mentor…the ex-Pontif of Mackay…seems that all the dumb things done in CQ now get to be done in NQ…

    • The Magpie says:

      Think you could expand on that a little? Of whom do you speak?

    • Critical says:

      And the ex Mackay person was on the CEO selection committee and thst was after Mackay people kicked her out if office.
      Talking to a Townsville person who recently visited Mackay and they say that CBD, the industrial area of Paget and other areas are starting to pump with activity again. Great to hear.

  6. City dweller says:

    Our mayor lurches from one disaster to another.
    Ironic front page photo in the Astonisher on Saturday of the Mullet standing in front of a dart board and getting overexcited about a darts show coming to town.
    Only thing missing was a Qantas logo on the dart board.

  7. SPQR says:

    Thanks for the coverage on our disgraceful Mayor. Every one of your readers who voted for her or her toadies should hang there heads in shame. You’re correct as I have aged my attitudes have hardened, yet something is very buggered up in our once worthy land. I mean aren’t we proud of how our cricketers have performed in Bangladesh. If they applied the same tenacity to their cricket as to their greed then who could stop them. And the Wallabies are the real deal eh! As for tennis, I remember Hoad, Emmerson, Rosewell, Smith, Newcombe, Roach, & Goolagong. These people made you proud to be an Aussie. Kyrgios& Tomic make me ashamed.
    As for sub-editing, you live in a glass house.

    • The Magpie says:

      And let’s not allow political correctness and late-age loopiness omit the wonderful Margaret Court from that list.

  8. Igor says:

    Can’t believe that Jenny’s usually savvy media advisers are orchestrating these increasingly cringeworthy attempts to present her as the Benevolent Mother bringing manna to the multitude. I wonder if members of the PR team have been asked yet to line up and touch the hem of her robe?
    Put a sock on it, Madam Mayor, because it’s starting to get creepy. Trust me when I say that all publicity is NOT good publicity!
    And a quick note to those advisers: Don’t make the same mistake as my boss, Dr Frankenstein.

    • The Ferret says:

      Maybe members of the PR team got the chop when the impaler did her thing

      • The Magpie says:

        Funny you should mention PR … The ‘Pie is told that Friday is Tony Chopper Wode’s last day. The long time straight shooting TCC media boss signalled his retirement (as reported here) a couple of months ago.

        • Clap trap says:

          And Tony Wode’s very capable offsider has already gone.

          • The Magpie says:

            Indeed she has … both are a great loss of friendly, professional faces at the council who were both lacking in bullshit. Perhaps a clue as to why they are no longer there.

  9. Sunshine Sal. says:

    Sad to see Bentley is away. I thought he would do wonders with yesterdays Bully front page. The LNP sure will. The dart board behind Jenny Hill should have said in each slice – sacked hundreds of local workers, highest rates in QLD, longest water restrictions, council budget with huge deficit..the list goes on, The middle circle is – still collecting hundreds and thousands off the public. Thats where her darts are heading, and why she looks so happy despite the gloom in the community.

    • Peter Sandery says:

      You have more faith then I in the LNP’s ability to lay a glove on anyone but the dissidents in their own party, Sal!

  10. Mike Douglas says:

    Mayor Mullets demise is based on a lack of people and leadership skills which is reflected in the lack of trust in her Councillors and how she micro manages them and poor choice in the Adele the impailer who was made Ceo of Australia’s 13 th biggest city with no experience.Mayor Mullet runs from one fire” battlers budget” to ” Jamie Durie 10 mil” now to Qantas.Not only is the Mullet failing the people of Townsville but when she is interviewed by southern press she loves to tell them she drives a V8 and pearlers like ” I don’t care if they burn dead cats just give us cheaper electricity”.Sadly not only has her own party deserted her but ask most business people in the ville to rate her.Our city deserves better and you have to ask when are our sycophant Councillors are going to make Mayor Mullet more accountable if ever.

    • Peter Sandery says:

      But all that was pretty obvious to any voter prior to the last council election, Mike; it makes the idea of non-compulsory elections even more acceptable to the thinking voters in my humble opinion.

  11. Fishing fan says:

    Took my granddaughter to the Kids Fishing Classic at Pallarenda this morning and we had a whale (pardon the pun) of a time. Well organised and great experience for the hundreds of youngsters who wet a line. Got a shock though when I went to the van (not run by the organisers) to order a coffee. $5 for a cup of tea or coffee!!!!! Recently travelled thru Spain by car and the most we paid for a flat white or latte was $2.50. Most places it was under $2.
    Why do we have to pay so much for a coffee that, according to a mate in the trade, costs less than 60 cents to make?

    • Bertie Barista says:

      Factor in the outrageous cost of labour on penalty rates, the capiral cost of equipment and rising prices for ingredients and $5 a cup doesn’t seem outrageous.
      Please, don’t compare the expense of brewing a cup of instant in your kitchen with a commercial operation.
      And I’m interested to know where you bought cheap coffee in Spain. I paid through the nose when there last year.

      • Fishing fan says:

        Sure you were in Spain and not la la land.? Try Madrid, Segovia, Seville and Valencia.
        As for the cost of 60 cents a cup, that came from a guy who owns and operates a coffee cart six days a week in Townsville.
        Have you ever wondered why a new coffee business opens up every week?
        Do you sell coffee yourself?

        • Bertie Barista says:

          As it happens, I am in that business. Currently taking a hard-earned break at my villa in St Moritz.

        • Droopy draws says:

          Yep, Fishing Fan. You’re right.
          Costs about 60c an 8 ounce cup of coffee to make….

          I paid $5 at a weekend sporting event a few weeks ago. Ridiculous.

          • Simon Templar says:

            Forget about the cat poo coffee – I am getting a strong whiff of bullshit tea right here.

          • Bertie Barista says:

            You have a good nose, Simon. The Devil made me do it.

          • Jung Talent Time says:

            You do realize, Fishing Fan and Droopy Draws, that there is a difference between the cost to make a cup of coffee vs the cost of making many cups of coffee and selling them, paying staff, paying rent, paying electricity, etc etc etc.

            You making a cup at home in your jockeys for your 60c is not really the same thing.

    • Coffee lover says:

      I agree, the price of coffee here is outrageous! It’s no wonder so many coffee shops come and ago with increasing frequency.

      • Droopy draws says:

        O well, can only go with what the cafe owner ha she told me it cost Tom slide across the counter Tom sell, Jung. No good arguing.
        Seems he’s making money; maybe it’s you who’s doing something wrong…?

  12. Critical says:

    Apparantly the next stouch coming up in TCC is going to be over a new EBA which is several years overdue for renegotiation. Rumours are that the Mullet and Impailer are wanting to slash staff conditions which have been in place for many years. Already comments of industrial action.

    • The Magpie says:

      Just what we bloody need, not that you can blame the persecuted staff. As they used to say, funny way to fly an aeroplane.

    • Dearie Me says:

      Hahaha! Well let me get my popcorn and a drink!!!

      The appallingly handled restructure which was foisted on the council’s predominantly white collar workers by the Impaler and her more than incompetent destroyer of people and culture (HR Manager) was ignored by unions and passed relatively silently through the outdoor workforce. They took redundancies, but the outdoor unions were mostly silent. The Impaler held meetings in the depots and spoke to them as if they were Warfies and she was the Chief Warfette.. and told inspiring stories of how she is a single mum, and how she was saving them all from the tax man, and her XO bobbed his baldy head behind her like a well trained puppy. And the unions rolled over like their bellies had been tickled by grandad. And staff were quietly outraged at the weakness of the unions and discussed how piss poor they had become, and how membership was a waste of money.
      But maybe…just maybe… If the EBA is being renegotiated, and the outdoor workforce stands to lose the last of their entitlements, the unions might find their balls from where they tucked them for safekeeping and actually do what unions were created for. To stand up for the workers.

  13. Achilles says:

    The Mullet may have Maltese ancestry, but she reminds me of one of those Russian dolls, i.e. completely full of herself

    • Sandgroper says:

      Once had a Maltese as a family pet. Nasty, snappy little bastard but I managed to pull it into line. Perhaps I should bring a rolled-up copy of The West Australian when next I visit Townsville? The Bulletin certainly wouldn’t bring your sick puppy to heel.

  14. Critical says:

    https://www.brisbanetimes.com.au/politics/federal/a-new-frontier-the-littleknown-alternative-to-the-457-foreign-worker-visa-20170901-gy8p0j.html

    No 457 visas said Adani and Anna Palachuck but no mention of using these visas to build the Adani railway, mine, port etc.

  15. Alacan says:

    I am currently enjoying working in a community where positivity and sense of belonging still exists

    The strangest thing to get used to is green grass .. it actually rains and the climate is cooler all year round than that which is Townsville.. love to be able to blame the mullet on the lack of rain but that may be a strecth methinks.

    Years ago I sat in Palmer street in July with an out of stater finalising a business deal and she remarked why would I want to live anywhere else .. I agreed.

    The question is now a bit different .. why live in Townsville now .. our family has been here for some 120 years. And I cannot find one good reason to slug it out given the state of affairs .. the place is buggered .. I can with some degree of confidence thank the mullet for finishing off what amalgamation started. you are right pie .. she is vicious ,, she and her current team does the city no good .. and now i paraphrase she is at best a disengenous wry smiling incompetent.

    On a recent trip back home I sat beside a couple who were returning from a South African holiday to return to their new home in Melany after spending their working life in the North. They couldn’t be happier and are pleased to have moved .

    It a sign of the time .. Thank goodness for the Cowboys who still inspire and contribute to community.. instead of just rubbing shoulders when they return home with the shield mullet would be well placed to learn a thing or two from a true business model that is true to its stakeholders

  16. Ando says:

    Re: the whale reference in above post.

    A bloke is in a Sydney pub having had a few too many, when he notices two rather large girls with accents at the table beside him.
    Putting on his best manners, he approaches them, “hello, are you two girls from Scotland”
    One of the women glares back at him and hisses “Wales, you idiot”

    He composes himself and tries again, “I mean, hello, are you two whales from Scotland”

  17. Lady Byron says:

    I was in town last Friday and had cause to go to the Camera Shop at 270 Flinders Street. I took into town with me a Nikon film camera that I needed a new battery for.

    There was a notice outside the Camera Shop that said ‘Closing Down Sale’.

    Retrieving my camera and taking out the Lithium pill C123 battery, I asked the sales man if he had a replacement. He scanned the packets of batteries hanging up and said none of that type was available – but he would test my one to ensure it was flat. (Of course, it was.)

    So being a bit of a Luddite and liking to use 35mm film now and again, I said ‘Never mind, I’ll have 3 rolls of colour film please…’

    The nice sales man replied ‘We don’t have any.’

    Thinking I had stumbled into a remake of that Monty Python Cheeseshop sketch all I could manage to say was ‘Pardon?’

    ‘Oh yes, its all gone now’ he replied.

    ‘So you have no film at all?’ I croaked.

    ‘Fraid so.’ he said.

    I asked; ‘Anywhere in town I can get some?’

    He said; ‘Oh no! Stockland has a camera shop, you might get some there…’

    After thanking him, he kindly told me the shop had been there 33 years but was now closing at the end of the month.

    So we will soon have yet another empty shop front in Townsville City.

    Every time I come over to town from Maggie its looking more and more like a ghost town. Its all very sad.

    The link below is to the Monty Python Cheese Shop Sketch on Youtube. Worth a look!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cWDdd5KKhts

    • Cantankerous but happy says:

      It’s not just during the day, we came back through town Sat night from the casino, place was empty, Flinders St East was empty, Palmer St was quiet, 9.00 pm, should be people everywhere, we are about to start a $250 million project in town and the fuckwits that run this place have wasted the entire opportunity, haven’t leveraged one single project off the back of it. Many believe it is actually worse now than 12 months ago, the money is still leaving town, seems every week or two comes the invite for drinks and farewell for someone else retiring and taking their money and heading south, eventually Pie your blog will be predominantly expat Townsville people from all over the country, won’t be too many left here.

  18. Alacan says:

    Back in the day when Chrisafooly was the lone Tory in amounsgt the labour majority council Mooney, and his mates including the Mullet gave him a good old flogging.

    Back in the next day when The Mullet was the lone lefty in the Tory majority government Tyrell and his mates including Chrisafooly gave her a good old flogging.

    I’m sure the Townsville community looked on in disgust and I have a view that the in part this formed a certain rationale to toss out those that perpetuated such poor and unprofessional behaviour regardless of tribe .. in both rounds.

    And today the adversarial attacks continue .. its like a level of paranoia that can’t go unabated along with a level of boredom of servicing the people that is only abated through upheavel upon upheaval.Just find different targets and attack. do they ever stop attacking .. it beggars belief .. they are infected to be sure.

    There is something seriously wrong with these people .. but they just don’t see it .. just continue along a path of self gratification at our expense.

    Think about Beattie and old Joe .. both survivors both polarising .. but both were always upbeat and smiled.. and that persona apart from the many flaws that caused serious legacy issues in Qld still managed to cut thru . Of course we now know that that that was just a front so a smile on the dial is not as trustworthy as it once was. A smile with substance .. now that’s a different story.

    An opposition of professional, calm, well presented , well spoken people needs to emerge and begin working on policy now. A new approach is needed .. without it the rot will seriously get into the structural timbers. 3 months to cyclone season .. I hope they are on to it .. but more than likely not .. due to so many of the technicians having now gone.

    We are at risk in so many ways. Step up Message Bank I always thought you had more substance than this.Mullet is a lost cause.

    • Grumpy says:

      Message Bank? Substance? He is as substantial as a custard sandwich. I spoke to him at the opening of the Boat Park (for which he was loudly and bombastically taking full credit). I walked away shaking my head. The man is a posturing clown. I also got a glimpse of the dim witted, cowardly union thug that lurks close beneath the surface.

      • The Magpie says:

        Also a glimpse of the business genius and former owner of a failed pizza business (how do you go bust in a pizza business in this town?)

        And FYI everybody, the expansion of Townsville’s boat parks are down to one man and his relentless campaign when in office … Vern Uncle Fester Veitch.

      • Alacan says:

        Have a gekko at my response to interested observer .. was completely taking the piss around the bleeding obvious with respect to old MB .. to be read in conjunction with the opening sentence of last para of just how vulnerable we are given the “talent” at the table and the state of affairs

      • Cantankerous but happy says:

        You got it in one Grumps, he is a manipulator, dumb as a rock but cunning when he needs to be, and sometimes the people too stupid to realise how stupid they are actually thrive, but he typifies the toxic leadership that has cemented itself across our major public services in this town, aided by a compliant state govt, the left are in total control.

    • Sunshine Sal says:

      Yes, step up Message Bank! Get some newbies. Surely you know Jenny Hill is on the nose in the community. Or has Jenny Hill shoved you under a train to promote Anne Marie Greaney?

  19. City dweller says:

    More evidence that the council has seriously dropped the ball when it comes to maintenance of parks and facilities:
    I took my grandkids to the children’s playground next door to the Big Bucket on The Strand last week and the whole area was a disgrace. Leaves ankle deep all over the park, bird shit all over the tables, eats and play equipment – even the remnants of spew on one table. This playground used to be spotless but now its a health hazard. It would be bad enough if it was a park for adults, but one designed especially for kids?
    Wonder what the tourists think when they stroll along The Strand and see the mess the playground has become.

    • Linda Ashton says:

      It’s the mall that will send them scuttling.

    • Dave Nth says:

      Commented recently about the park in Valerie Ln Deeragun that it took 2 complaints from me and over 6 months to fix when the local teenagers burnt the pipe babies & toddlers loved to crawl through. They replaced it with not another pipe but a chain Bailey’s bridge that children can fall off now. The rot started as soon as mullett got full control…

    • Alahazbin says:

      That’s what happens when you reduce the frontline workforce and put in private contractors. Everything is done to a price, not to a standard.

  20. Interested Observer says:

    You thought messagebank had substance. You just shot down any argument you will ever put forward.

    • Alacan says:

      Ahh interested observer Keep alert for the tongue in cheek and healthy dose of sarcasm amidst the deeper doodling .. it can even appear at the end sometimes .. none of them that warm the seats in chambers rate in this humble bloggers view

      • The "JOHN" says:

        I’m pretty sure IO can read all the way through your comments. Yeah tougne and cheek but be careful once you put a comment online it’s there forever. Message bank might misread it and think he’s got an extra voter out there lol

  21. Old tradesman says:

    Well Jenny is headlines again today. I penned one into the the Sorbent paper,got an instant deletion, all I said was that Jenny has the right boots but her feet are getting bigger, and that she needs to be pulled into line as she is an embarrassment to Townsville and North Qld.

  22. Watcher says:

    See the truth has finally been revealed about the darts tournament heavily promoted by Mayor Mullett and the Astonisher on Saturday. In todays rag we find out that the event is being promoted by the paper and the council. We even get a new dose of propaganda with six positive comments lifted from the online edition. Strange that the editor couldn’t find any negative comments despite the fact that on Saturday afternoon negatives outnumbered positives by 3 to 1. Whatever happened to balanced reporting. Since editor Ben Bogan arrived in town all we get is unbalanced rorting.

    • The Magpie says:

      Both The Mullet and Ben Bogan believe this little cynical exercise in self-promotion disguised as community boosting will appeal to what they believe their core constituency – an image of fancy-dress drunks dressed as rabbits waving placards proclaiming ‘woon ‘undred en atey’.

  23. JJ says:

    Why are we giving $70 million in compensation to asylum seekers from Manus Island? Slater and Gordon are the lawyers. Who is standing up for the tax payer? I’m disgusted what can we do about this?

  24. Kenny Kennett says:

    Shame and scandal in Melbourne as it’s announced that the Victorian Govt aren’t going to stump up the required one million bucks to host the Logies. Word now being thrown around is that the Gold Coast, Tamworth or Dubbo are in the running. Here’s another opportunity for another ‘could’ story for the Astonisher. Why not throw in Townsville, Benny Bogan. And get Jamie Dury to host it and tell everyone who attends how to save water. Jenny and Benny could present the Gold Logie, MessageBank the silver and the Impaler the Logie for Lifetime achievement.
    Or more appropriately, Jenny and Benny WIN the Logie for most UNPOPULAR (bullshit) artists, MessageBank WINS brown (nosed) Logie, Impaler wins the Logie for destroying the most lifetime achievements.
    Come on Mullet stump up the $million and we can hold it at Lancini Stadium as a double header for the dart competition.

    • The Magpie says:

      hahahah … you’re on fire this morning Kenny.

      • The Magpie says:

        Hey while we’re here, Kenny’s sparked a bit of fun … who can come up with the best ‘Could’ story worthy of the Townsville Bulletin? Nothing is too ludicrous … if it isn’t for them, it isn’t for us.

        • Kenny Kennett says:

          “Mayor Mullet could meet with Board members of Target Department stores after an alleged comment made by North Korean Defence officials. It is alleged the comments resembled a reference to Australia painting a target that Kim Jun Dill could aim for in the region. Quick thinking Mullet will allegedly request that Target stores immediately dismantle all signage in Townsville as it could be seen to provoke the North Korean Dick-tator. In an exclusive by the Daily Astonisher, Mayor Mullet says she has informed her Council of the situation and they are to standby without doing anything. Deputy Mayor MessageBank said: “We’re used to doing nothing so we have no problems following the Mayors orders on this occasion”
          The dismantling of the Target signs could lead to as many as 1278 jobs in Townsville which is a victory for the Independant Hill Council.
          The Astonisher believes that this latest move should not affect the upcoming darts tournament which it is believed could attract $1.5 billion to the local economy in dart sales alone.

        • Terry Smith says:

          Townsville could host the World Apathy Conference. The Mullet would love to be the keynote speaker at an international conference and chances are that no one would give a tinkers’ toss.

          • The Magpie says:

            Mayor Mullet was asked if she ignorant or apathetic… she replied ‘I don’t know and I don’t care’.

  25. Lord Howard Hertz says:

    But so far, the Astonisher aka The Coulda Courier’ has missed the biggest of all the could stories.

    TOWNSVILLE TARGET FOR NORTH KOREA ATOM BOMB MISSILES.

    Laugh while you can, they’ll print that soon enough.

    • Dave of Kelso says:

      It seems that, if you are a maniacal dictator with a willingness to
      execute family members and starve your population, an unhealthy interest in
      intercontinental ballistic missiles, and a hatred for the USA, no one has
      the courage to tell you that your have a really crap haircut.

    • Kingswood says:

      What a ridiculous over the top statement, as if they would target us with a missile.

      Their operatives have been hiding in those supposed tunnels under Townsville, just waiting for dear leader to give them the signal….;)

      • The Magpie says:

        With the express order not to harm the mayor.
        ‘I’ll look after that sexy little minx myself,’ Dear Leader instructed, sweating.

  26. I'll be plucked says:

    Re Mayor Mullet lashing out at the proposed LNP embargo on Power Exec bonuses – I thought she was the ‘Townsville Mayor’, not aligned to any political party (in this case the ALP) and supposed to focus on Townsville City Council matters (aka rates, rubbish, water, parks and gardens etc)? Is she now a ‘candidate’ for the upcoming Qld state election? Pluck me……….

    • Dave of Kelso says:

      Dear Plucked,

      Red Jen has been radical fundamentalist ALP from day dot. The following is a letter from me printed in the Townsville Daily Bullsheet recently (if the Magpie allows me to recycle). Red Jen did not reply.

      In a lunatic act of radical fundamentalist political correctness,
      Melbourne’s Labor/Green Yarra City Council has abolished Australia Day in
      that local government area. The current Townsville City Council is 100%
      ALP. Does the TCC intend to follow the example of their Labor mates in
      Melbourne?

  27. Gonzo says:

    Pie, That was a comprehensive pasting of Mayor Mullet. How has she managed to keep her job after all her stuff-ups? Well done!

  28. I'll be plucked says:

    TB Headline Offering:

    Mayor chokes on humble pie – ‘I got it all wrong’……….

  29. Dave of Kelso says:

    This may be an old issue but I will raise it anyway.

    Certain “activists” and “academics” are unhappy about statues to leaders and others from our colonial past. Some want to pull them down and other geniuses want to raise statues of indigenous leaders, past and present to achieve balance.

    In 2005 whilst at Ularo / Ualroo / Ueraloo / bugger it, Ayers Rock I visited the Visitor Information Center, conspicuously staffed by young European backpackers. On one wall, all in uniform varnished wooden frames, were scores of photos of locals, local events and locations. About one third of them had black insulation tape covering them as well as black tape over the explanatory plaque below each of the affected photos.

    It was explained to me that the covered photos contained images of locals who had died and it was against local Aboriginal sensibilities to depict the dead or to say their names.

    Indeed, on the ABC before any historical program about indigenous matters the show is preceded with, “Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people are advised that the following program contains images and voices or deceased persons.”

    In light of this I wonder how traditional indigenous folk would welcome bloody great statues of their colonial leaders ( all deceased ) and of living indigenous leaders that, in the fullness of time, will be deceased. Instead of black insulation tape, it will be bloody great black bags covering all the statues.

    I am of the view that the antics of all these “activists” and “academics” will be to Advance Australia Backwards!

    post script:
    In the 12 years since my visit to that visitor center I wonder how many more of these photos now have black tape over them? It cannot help to inform the visitors, can it?

    • The Magpie says:

      Advance Australia Backwards, maybe, but certainly not ‘Fair’.

    • Ando says:

      I’d wondered about this in the past; so I asked a knowledgeable murri acquaintance of mine.
      By my understanding, it is tradition to not use the deceased persons tribal name or image during the grieving period. The length of this can vary and is determined by the family or clan. The deceased person is referred to by a proxy or nickname during this time.

      • The Magpie says:

        The ‘Pie’s memory is a bit faulty here, but what you say about nicknames was reflected in the fact – that Cameron Doomagee was also known as Mulrunji, and Palm people used only one of those two names where possible throughout the long legal process …. but The ‘Pie cannot recall which way it worked.

      • Simon Templar says:

        Here’s one thing I don’t understand.

        Traditional Aboriginal art never involved portraiture of individuals. How is it, then, that just about every ABC show warns that” the following program may show images of deceased persons” . Images of specific persons, living or dead, were never part of the culture, so how is the modern science of photography now specifically forbidden?

        I can understand not speaking of the deceased – there are numerous other cultures with the same practice.

        Can anyone throw some light?

  30. Mike Douglas says:

    When it comes to QAL,has Mayor Mullet taken into account the $3 charge for Taxis passed straight onto passengers( over 70% Qantas) kaching kaching to get thru the toll gate.Also when the Mullet says she respects Paul Pissale and what he has done for Ipswich and she would like emulate that in Townsville can she ” please explain”?.

  31. The Lone Ranger says:

    Here’s another “could” story for the Astonisher:
    “Editor Ben English could be promoted to Papua New Guinea”.
    I’d be happy to give him a reference.

  32. The Magpie says:

    Seems The Magpie’s info on the My Family Doctor clinic in Kirwan and its director, struck-off doctor Praveen Kumar was on the money.

    In a one-minute-to-midnight flit, there was a scramble pver the weekend to not jst vacant the premises as ordered by authorities, but to set up shop around the corner.

    A person in the know believes this move is far from the end of the matter, as its last minute suddeness raises plenty of other questions. He writes:

    ‘Rather ironic, Magpie, that the Clinic is relocating (supposedly relocating) to the Indigenous Health Centre a few doors down the road and around the corner on Ross River Road given PK supposedly couldn’t effect settlement on this building some months ago.
     
    Further that this site on upper Ross River Road was still fully fenced off around the perimeter with temporary fencing this morning which features For Sale signage by John Gribbin R/E. Granted the temporary fencing can come down rather quickly though it all looks very odd.


     
    Wiser heads than me might also suggest that the move is made all the more interesting given it is appears to be being made rather hastily yet also given it supposedly takes months of notice to and with the likes of Medicare to relocate a medical practice from one site to another.
    
One would think in planning the logistics of such a move that there also would have been a lengthy period of notice to the wider community and patient / client base by such means as :
     
    –          Promoting it on the business website,
    –          Promoting it on the business Facebook page,
    –          Promoting it on signage within the existing Clinic,
    –          Promoting it on external signage on either building,
    –          Promoting it by print advertisements in the Townsville Bulletin,
    –          And so on and so on,
     
    Yet it seems that none (or little) of this has been done which highlights my point of this being done very hastily and having a degree of colour to it.
     
    It is getting more interesting by the minute and I am sure the old bird might now feel more confident that things don’t appear to be quite right with Kumar more so than how things may have appeared a few days prior.’

  33. Cantankerous but happy says:

    Not too bright at the astonisher are they, still reporting on the possibilities of the Adani FIFO hub for Townsville, you can go onto Seek or sort through the endless streams of shit that gets sent through on LinkedIn and all the jobs are FIFO Rocky or Townsville, they will split it which was always on the cards, so the two Labor mayors presiding over the basket case economies in Qld of Townsville and Rocky can have another picture in the respective papers.

  34. Watcher says:

    Ben Bogan must be scratching for stories, given the yarn today (with a photo of her in council mode) about Councillor Ann Maree Greaney breaking her wrist but still going to the USA on holidays.
    If that is considered newsworthy he can easily get 20 or so similar stories every day if he sends a reporter out to the hospital emergency department.
    What’s next, Mayor Mullet shoots herself in the foot but still goes on junket to Singapore?

  35. Kenny Kennett says:

    “Kate to give birth in Townsville”.
    Astonisher exclusive.
    In a Mayor Mullet inspired coup, it is believed that should Princess Kate fall pregnant for a ninth time in the future, the Prince or Princess could well be born in Townsville.
    Mayor Mullet said:”I’ve received reports from Gus Middleton (a 6th generation relative of Kate’s former work friend) that this in fact could happen. If Kate and William are visiting Townsville at the time when an emergency caesarean is required, there’ll be no where else to go. The royal couple have close ties to Townsville by way of a friend of a friend’s daughter’s wife’s uncle being the assistant team manager of the British men’s basketball team who will compete in Townsville for the qualifying rounds in the Commonwealth Games in April next year”. Mullet continued: “This, in itself could lure the royal couple to Townsville as early as next April. That could be the first public display of the new baby which would create up to 1458 jobs in baby sitting, laundry and security industries. In addition, given these circumstances there’s a chance that the couple’s fourth child could be be conceived in the Presidential suite of the Ville. The Mullet also said (referring to the new Lancini stadium which has fuck all to do with basketball): “as I’ve said all along, build it and they will come”.

  36. Cantankerous but happy says:

    And another nail in the coffin of the CBD, Honeycombes have bought the rail yards across from the stadium, this is exactly why Townsvilles economy is deep in the shit, more land bought by a busted arse local who doesn’t have the funds to do anything with it, the land will be an eyesore for years, something for the cameras to scan over to when there is a break in play, tumbleweeds and wurly winds spinning in the dust.

    • The Magpie says:

      But hang on a minute, there is a major question here. Peter Honeycombe says he can’t reveal the price of the highly contaminated land he has bought from – The ‘Pie assumes – the Queensland government … our government, ergo our land. Big question …WHY NOT? He surely can’t claim Commercial In Confidence, and neither can the government, which has an obligation to be transparent.
      Defnition of CinC>
      ‘Commercial in confidence. A classification that identifies information that, if disclosed, may result in damage to a party’s commercial interests, intellectual property or trade secrets. You must not disclose any information marked ‘Commercial in Confidence’ without permission from the party who supplied it.’ end quote

      How does that work in this case? (You can certainly dismiss ‘intellectual property’).

      And keeping the price a secret only fuels rumours that are already circulating that PH has got a sweetheart deal, well below any market valuation, possibly because of the astronomical cost of legally required remediation of the toxic site. But why not say so, who’s interests are going to be harmed?

      Tell you what, the interests that will be harmed if this remains shrouded in unjustifiable secrecy will be the both public perception and Townsville’s reputation as a place to do business.

      Until Peter Honeycombe and/or the government adopt a more transparent approach – both have chequered histories in business matters – people are sure to regard this as just another rort by the Gilded Few.

      • Memory Man says:

        Saw the coverage and your comments on the blog today. Yes, transparency is demanded. I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s a long settlement period, subject to this, that and the other. There’ll potentially be a rates holiday in there too. Also note that Peter says it could (there’s that word, again) take five years to get the masterplanning right … yep, five years. Meanwhile it would be used to house machinery for the stadium build.

      • Scientician79 says:

        Pie, that land is actually privately held.

        When the Labour Government carved up Queensland Rail a few years back that parcel went with the private entity (Aurizon). Government hasn’t had a stake in it since they sold off the last of the shares a few years back.

        • The Magpie says:

          The ‘Pie stands corrected on the facts, but not on the general thrust of the comment. Maybe neither party want any information revealed that could lead to extent of the remediation required … so maybe Honeycombe got the rail yards for a dollar, but that would give the game away … Aurizon finds alocal patsy to take thier white elephant.

    • Ando says:

      Sources tell me there will be a local fabrication firm setting up shop in the old rail yards. Their current premises aren’t large enough for upcoming jobs.
      Can’t say whether it is for the stadium steel work or not though.

      • The Magpie says:

        The idea of using the land for the stadium construction firms is a good short business idea, since one assumes remediation work will not be required – indeed, may add to the problem when it later needs to be addressed. It is the eventual use to which the land is put that is the crucial question here, a question that is certainly going to be asked by the CBD traders and landlords who need further competition for the highly doubtful largesse Lancini’s dream will bring.

      • Lord Howard Hertz says:

        Wonder if the stadium contractors for construction scaffolding will be using the Honeycombe land … Pete had a major stoush with scaffolders which did not reflect well on him when building one of his apartment blocks across the creek a couple of years back. Wonder if scaffolding companies would trust leav\ing their equipment on land controlled by him.

        • Grumpy says:

          I recall when some disgruntled purchaser unfurled a banner on the units over the cutting, calling out the Honeycombes for dodgy building work – and the undignified scramble by them to tear it down…

          Must have been at least 10 years ago.

          • Cantankerous but happy says:

            I remember it well Grumps, it was all to do with water funny enough, not the type that goes through the pipes, but the water that comes down through the roof, and the subsequent walls and floors underneath that roof when it rained, also some of the patios sloped the wrong way so water would pool outside the door onto the balcony. In those days there was a common saying across the north, don’t buy anything built by anyone who’s name started with “H”, there were a few around too!

          • The Magpie says:

            The water pooling on patios was a major cock-up at the Dalgety on Denham … still is.

          • Dearie Me says:

            Are we talking the reformed carpark debacle where the pool drained through the entire complex (saves on plumbing) or the wondrous hillside setting where days before opening the common areas were washed out with fire hoses and the storage rooms filled up like pools? Or is it noddy land on Bundock Street where the public housing used to be? Or some of these units in Ogden St where the air conditioning units were imported and unsuitable for local conditions and then located out of reach of repair men? Oh stuff it… rule stands….don’t buy anything where the developers name starts with H and sounds like something to do with Bees….

  37. JJ says:

    Asylum seekers now rejecting the $70 million compensation for being detained on Manus Island. They want more. Much more. And the Australian taxpayer as usual will just roll over. This country is lost. We are no longer in control of our own country. If you break our laws don’t expect compensation.

    • Ezra Pound Axe King says:

      Pretty sure it was the federal government breaking the law there, JJ… check out the definition of political asylum, and then check out the definition of detainee. It’s one or the other.

  38. Doctor Doctor says:

    The good (now ex) Dr PK should have been struck off and sent to prison years ago. Falsifying records to claim more rebates from Medicare is illegal.

  39. Sandgroper says:

    Interesting that the Honeycombe story is ‘subscriber only’ and doesn’t have provision for comment, while it’s open slather with the Greaney broken wrist saga.
    Take the time to access that yarn online because the comments are biting and often hilarious, even including a mullet mention. Our new commentator, “John”, is on fire.

    • Peewee Herman says:

      And why the need for The Astonisher to print –

      a) “on her way to Coffee Dominion”
      and
      b) Cr Greaney said she would be taking no action over the incident. “It was my own fault,” she said. After they already printed it was a freak accident.

      God they are useless :(

    • The "JOHN" says:

      Thanks gropes it’s not hard to bait them is it. And I was being honest I don’t know who she is! She certainly did slip on the keys to the city because she can’t say it’s from a wet footpath

    • Bubble Gun says:

      Yes it is. Seems an insider doesnt want Cr Greaney getting too popular. Overseas holidays for Pollies go down badly in this town. Jenny Hill, or could that be Cr Les Walker, must be feeling the competition. Not many will be standing at the next election.

      • The Magpie says:

        Dark horse that needing watching is that potty-mouthed Ryder woman … seems a good division councillor from some reports, and has a canny political background, out west, The ‘Pie hears.

  40. Kingswood says:

    Breaking News

    “TEL & Councillors currently in North Korea undertaking peace mission”.

    ‘Our happy smiles and positive attitude will make them see how the west gets things done; we’ve achieved so much locally, why cant we achieve world peace too’?

    The DPKR have released a statement,

    ‘We’ll give up our nukes if you take them back…’

  41. The Magpie says:


    What’s the big deal? Colin at Sweethearts Adult Shop has been selling them – with a free bicycle pump – for years.

  42. The Magpie says:

    RELIABLE SOURCES HAVE INFORMED THE MAGPIE THAT THE IMPALER IS NO MORE.

    Adele Young is reported by insiders to have had a big blue with (who else?) Mayor Mullet and has left the council.

    But it smacks of what The Magpie said all those months ago … although inexperienced and totally unsuited to the position, The Impaler was brought by Labor specifically to do a job on the staff for Mayor Mullet, and has departed as per script.

    Disgraceful.

    • I'll be plucked says:

      What more can one say? “I’ll be plucked”……….

      • Grumpy says:

        All part of a cunning Baldrick-style plan…

        Mission accomplished, the wicked peroxide witch hops on her broom and returns south, where she will count her generous severance pay and compensation – commercial-in-confidence, of course.

        Hill will then be able to return to her familiar refrain of blaming someone else – “I didn’t agree with what she was doing and tried to stop her but ended up having to get rid of her – see what I do for you battlers?”

        • Sunshine Sal says:

          Might be a bit hard to do Grumps. Considering a. All the trouble Jenny Hill went to to get Adele Young, b. Photos of them together c. The Bulletin promoting both of them as a team d. The very fact that Jenny Hill signed off on all the sackings e. She did nothing at the time of the sackings, never came out and complained like she did under the old CEO and f. She will be the only figurehead left to blame for the sackings come election time. Although as Pete S points out the LNP in this town are hopeless.

          • Wally says:

            IMPALER?
            There was a story about two weeks ago that she applied for a job in Melbourne. They can have her, no info on what team she will claim..

          • The Magpie says:

            Don’t get your hopes up too high. The ‘Pie has been informed tonight that announced to one and all when she arrived that she took a month around this time of every year for job placement as part of her law degree.
            Damn!

    • Dearie Me says:

      When one is the self proclaimed Queen of all that one purveys one throws regular tantrums and hurls abuse like confetti. Tantrums and arguments are a daily occurrence for the Impaler. She hurls abuse at Mullet, the councillors and staff on a regular basis because after all, because she is far superior to us mere backwards hicks who still have dirt behind our ears. (I think she forgets she comes from some 2 dog town in central Queensland – no horses it wasn’t big enough)

      Until I see her fat arse, Botox and bad hair on loaded onto a plane, with all her dogs, relatives and cronies in tow, I’m afraid you’re just getting our hopes up and smashing them into the ground.

      Give us some concrete evidence Pie!!!! We want photos!!! (Or maybe not…)

    • Mooney Street Blues says:

      Fingers crossed, mate…

    • Kingswood says:

      Could it be?

      Is the ‘reign of error’ over?

    • Dutch Reverend says:

      JENNY TO THE RESCUE !!!! Headline. TCC will now be able to function due to the overthrowing of another dysfunctional and evil traitor. Jenny was overheard saying that she feels betrayed and never saw this coming. I had no idea that the CEO was getting rid of so many loyal council employees and creating an atmosphere of fear and distrust. I may now be able to possibly ensure that I will turn things around and rule over a completely functional council with a multitude of projects on the books that “could” see Townsville as the leading regional city in the country.

      • Dearie Me says:

        Haven’t you seen the job advertisements… proclaiming “Townsville – Capital of Northern Australia”

        Do they even know what that encompasses? I wonder how Darwin feels about that?

  43. Lady Byron says:

    Here’s a new headline for The Bulletin:-

    ‘Alan Joyce renounces his gay status, and plans to marry Townsville Mayor Jenny Hill: ‘She’s such a sexy minx’ he told our reporter… ‘She just turned me!’

    • Ozzie John says:

      Joyce will have to fight Maggers off first. The old bird is cunning enough to disguise his ardor for Miss Hill. Pretends he doesnt like her. Hah, I say. I think he gets Bentley to draw sensual pictures of Jenny for him too ogle. This is the reason Bentley is on leave. The stress has got him.

  44. Concerned citizen says:

    Going to be very interesting in the coming weeks if Adele has left the building. Word from one of the few experienced employees left at the council is that most departments have ground to a halt through lack of staff and lack of experience to direct the staff that are left. In one department all that is left is a trainee. Wonder who is doing the training. Expect mass vacancies to be advertised with some experienced employees, who should never have been sacked in the first place, applying for their old jobs back – after collecting redundancy, of course. One way or another Mayor Mullet has backed herself into a very sticky corner with her hiring of the charming Adele. Big guess now is who she blames for the debacle. You can bet it won’t be Her Mulletship.
    And there is no truth to rumours that Townsville nightclubs halved their liquor orders after hearing news of Adele’s possible departure.

    • Alahazbin says:

      John Anderson’ little piece about the Impaler returning and referring to her as “beloved” would have all the TCC employees gagging, but he was being sarcastic.

      • The Magpie says:

        Of course, but such is the level of intelligence the paper aims at, it’s always dangerous territory (gawd, even The ‘Pie boggles at some of the comments – often not published – sent in to the comments).

  45. Red's Girls says:

    So, with Cowan out of the picture, who’s in line to be Townsville’s next Judge? Time for a female perhaps?

    • The Magpie says:

      Doesn’t appear to be a hot favourite but a few ill be sweating on Anna’s election plans – judgeship always go to the faithful of the party in power. Justin Greggery is too young (but he’ll be a judge one day) the choleric Tony Collins, who had a trial run a few years ago that didn’t go well, might be too old and possibly too wealthy, and The ‘Pie’s twisted mind will keep an eye on Janice Mayes. She’s a capable barrister but doesn’t appear to have the required broad breadth across all aspects of law (she seems to specialise in family law). That said, she is the missus of arch arm twister Mike Capt Snooze Reynolds, who may try for a last gasp effort of his waning influence to get his good lady elevated to the bench … after all we are really talking politics here. Age is always a factor – the younger a qualified person is, the better their chances … Brisbane wants to get a good run for their generous pension scheme. Ms Mayes is that right timeframe what’s the opposite of a cougar?)

    • Grumpy says:

      Here we fucking go again.

      “Time for a female perhaps”

      That type of sexist garbage made the State Magistrates Court system an unfunny joke a couple of decades ago. Remember Foley’s Follies? Empty-headed, inexperienced and inadequate females were appointed on the basis of their gender (and membership of the ALP). Not being up to the job, they hid their incompetence behind nasty, ill tempered and outrageous court demeanour. Having been promoted far beyond what they would have achieved on their own merits in private practice, they still cling to the public tit like malevolent trolls.

      So how about “Time for a merit-based appointment – AGAIN”

  46. Critical says:

    http://www.northweststar.com.au/story/4901326/mount-isa-airport-cuts-its-landing-charges/?cs=190

    QAL cuts fees in Mount Isa but wants to increase fees in Townsville. Doesn’t quite make sense

  47. The "JOHN" says:

    Today is bin collection day and after having a chat with my garbo I can’t hold off on this. Today at there Depot as we speak at least 4 trucks sit ideal not collecting rubbish. Not because they are broken down but because of staff either sick or short. These vehicles are something that most of us can drive but cannot operate. Which means you can’t just call in labour hire to fill spots. So who’s doing all the work??? Every driver now has to do overtime and a lot will work through there breaks. As a lot have been doing this anyway.

    So that means that we probably have around 2 million dollars of equipment sitting without people to use them. This is supposed to be a business unit in the council, if I ran a business and had trucks not doing anything then it means I’m not running it properly. The driver said not having them on the road doesn’t mean efficiency. it means others have to take the weight and there vehicles are pushed harder, in the long and short term they break down quicker.

    This is one of the services that actually work well in council and this is what it has become. My rates are paying for these trucks to do nothing. And to top it off the reason we are short of drivers is because they haven’t replaced them from redundancy recently. I asked if the driver was part of the redundancy then how can they be replaced? That means council paid out someone for no reason. This was meant to streamline the council. This is a joke and these poor barstards are suffering from bad management. This has been going on since March apparently.

    • The Magpie says:

      The ‘Pie noted last week that the collection truck, which invariably turns up in the early AM, didn’t get here until mid-PM. Maybe this is why.

  48. Old tradesman says:

    The recycle truck dropped my bin with the yellow lid the other day causing it to shatter, credit where credit is due he diligently collected all the yellow bits and pieces and left. Next day along comes a truck and drops off a new bin with a Red lid. I put it out and guess what the recycle truck didn’t take it. So being testy I placed one bin on my footpath and the other on my neighbours Both picked up by the rubbish truck. I believe there is no recycling place in Townsville, so everything goes to the landfill are the Green warriors aware of this.

  49. Sandgroper says:

    Is the Bulletin having an each-way bet on Adani? Its lead online story this morning — freely available to all — is about shock-jock Alan Jones’ opposition to the project. It includes devastating criticisms about the Adani Group’s corporate morality, financial status and appalling environmental record, together with some truly frightening information about the wasteland the proposed mine would create for future generations.
    Given the newspaper has been one of the project’s biggest cheerleaders, does this signal the beginning of some balanced reporting?

    • The Magpie says:

      balanced reporting? You jest, sport. If they are swaying another way, then the winds of advantage have changed direction. And Jones and the paper must have been reading The Magpie. Th old bird (and you, Gropes, among other commenters) have been pointing out the Adani swindle and bullying for many months now. There is obviously some shift behind the scenes … it may have something to do with the looming election.

      Then there’s the other way of looking at it, a classic News ploy.

      Once an issue seems likely to go ahead after a lot of support from the paper, the other side of the coin is printed so the paper can claim balance, even when the matter like Adani goes ahead.

  50. A Reader says:

    The LNP in this town have constantly gone to the bulletin asking them to investigate the sackings at the TCC. The Bulletin refused.

    • The Magpie says:

      Might have to answer a few questions of their own, eh?

    • Raaflmao says:

      Utter bullshit. If the LNP had any interest in the affairs of local government, they’d be advocating for more sackings, not less. Wake up.

      • Alex DeLarge says:

        Errrr – Townsville First was an LNP-orientated mob. Didn’t hear of any mass sackings in their reign.

      • The "JOHN" says:

        Yeah tell that to the ones that did get the sack. Just like your name your comment is just scattered. I vote Kather or one nation and that’s my choice but to bag a LNP council who were clearly not Going to sack anyone but rather let Natural atrition make there numbers shrink. Big difference to the lying mullet. I’m guessing you could be related to one of the 20 million labour state servents that needed to be culled. Only to be replaced with 40 million later. Go figure

    • Sunshine Sal says:

      Why don’t they go national? Chuck in some water issues, including the pricing and quality of the water, some odd land deals and the Adani racket and you’ve got a hum dinger “exclusive”. That’s before you get to TEL and the consultancys. Say, journos should be all over the ville. It’s a name making town.

    • Dave Nth says:

      Sorry disagree on the LNP; had some correspondence with the LNP re Council and was left wanting. Mentioned there may be a need for the minister (when/if elected) to look at the present dealings after the election and why LNP candidates were so quiet about the stench emanating from Walker st especially with a select few to do handsomely out of the Stadium we don’t need (over upgrading Kirwan in a much better geographical location). Then that’s where the correspondence stopped.

      Not casting aspersions but it is a fact of life; the influence of self interest. Have a look at the Political donations declarations and you may get a reason why the LNP hasn’t gone near this… Not sure whether PHON is the answer but untainted new blood is desperately needed.

    • Peter Sandery says:

      Would have thought a parliamentary debate on a matter of public importance might be more in order than a request to the local rag that clearly shows a bias to the current council but that is clearly beyond the ken of the current LNP power brokers in Brisbane at least!

  51. The Owl says:

    Maybe the Alan Jobes yarn was posted by a web master in Sydney who doesn’t know about Ben Bogans bias and agenda. Tipping it will disappear once the Bogan reads this blog

  52. Cantankerous but happy says:

    So the humble plastic bag is a goner from the supermarkets next year, then they will make you pay 15 cents each for their heavier bags, a quick tip from friends in SA and NT where this already happens, take your Coles labelled bags into Woolies and vice versa, they hate that and on many occasions politely ask ” would you like a couple of our bags for free for next time you come in” , works a treat apparently.

    • I'll be plucked says:

      Cantankerous, the bagman, bag woman, bag person………:)

    • Critical says:

      Anna had a word to Mullet not to worry too much about recycling garbage collections after next July next year, and having garbage collectors, everyone will be keeping their bottles to claim their 10 cents per bottle and if you put it out in the recycle bin then the bogan scavengers eill go through your rubbish overnight and take it anyway. anyway so there won’t be a need for all the trucks and drivers

  53. Not Laughing says:

    Joke of the week – Townsville Airport declaring they’re supporting 3,000 jobs for the redevelopment but just yesterday slashed their very own Airport team by 20% with redundancies of some staff who had been there 30+ years.

  54. Concerned citizen says:

    Nothing in the Astonisher so far about The Impaler’s rumored departure from Walker Street but I can assure you that there was one hell of a screaming match with the Mayor which ended with The Impaler indicating, in terms that cannot be used in this wholesome blog, that she was no longer interested in living in Brownsville.
    Either the Mullet is hushing things up – she’s pretty experienced in that department – or they have kissed and made up (scary thought that!).
    Time will tell.

    • The Magpie says:

      Errrkk! That’s verging on the pornopgraphic. Mullet and Impaler Kissing? The ‘Pie ill now go find his wire brush to scrub his eyeballs.

    • Dearie Me says:

      I wish someone…maybe Mullet.. would make it clear to the Impaler that we don’t want the Impaler and her unwarranted massive ego, her intimidation and her fraud…
      Oh yes… If you can’t approve the whole contract on your financial delegation… approve it in pieces….
      We also don’t want her nepotism, assigning jobs and contracts to mates and associates, her gutter politics and foul mouth. If you thought fraud and corruption was bad before she arrived, think again….
      We don’t want her condemnation and denigration of our people and our city. We are not some backwater. We are not uneducated hicks. She clearly is incapable of the role she was appointed to do and is throwing tantrums and blame to cover her inabilities.
      The woman is a disgrace. A nasty bully. I’m all for the advancement of women in the workplace but not this sort of woman. This sort should be kept contained within the trailer park from whence they came.

      • The Magpie says:

        End line gets The Magpie’s Comment of the Day Award … and your first line could surely equally apply to Mayor Mullet. Oh, well, it will in a couple of more excruciating years.

    • Kingswood says:

      Noticed in the ‘notices’ page in the TB that Adele has her name against a TCC meeting that is cancelled for next week.

  55. Cantankerous but happy says:

    Nothing that I can see in the astonisher today about JCU being in the financial shit once again. Whilst it is convenient for JCU to scream poor at the moment in the face of ongoing staff pay negotiations it does however highlight glaring deficiencies in the way it has been run for some time. I know well a bean counter who was there for quite a period of time up until a few years ago and advised on many occasions the money they were spending at the Cairns campus was unsustainable and would never be recouped and a drain on finances, education was changing and more students would be accessing studies remotely and online, they needed to consolidate and focus their main campus being Townsville. Sure enough on the news last night JCU whinging about the southern universities taking students leaving it short on numbers which means under-utilised buildings and costs. What is it about many of the Norths institutions being run by incompetent dickheads stuck in a mindset from 15-20 years ago.

    • Sandgroper says:

      Cranky, you’re right about JCU being caught in some sort of time-warp. It doesn’t stand a chance againt the more agressively marketed universities, notably CQU.
      My acadill and boofademic friends here in the Wild West are also getting their knickers in a twist about CQU’s aggressive sales pitches, which extend so far as bus-back advertising for online students.
      I suspect that a certain CQU graduate I mentored during my years in Townsville has been hired to market his old school. If so, I have helped put a feral cat among the plump, self-satisfied pigeons of academia.

      • Scientician79 says:

        The university has had this coming to them for some time.

        It always amazed me that they couldn’t see it coming and now are complaining about the competition. I say bring on CQU and any others.

        JCU is stuck in a time warp and has also been playing the council game for a while letting qualified long serving staff go only to replace them with incompetent blow in’s for more money.

  56. Watcher says:

    Disturbing story on Ch 7 news last night about JCU being “in decifit” but curiously nothing in todays Astonisher.
    JCU boss Sandra Harding is part of editor Ben Bogans protected few so I guess that explains it or has the editor missed yet another important story.
    Also noted that Harding who is never backward in coming forward when JCU has something positive to announce sent one of her underlings to face the media on the decifit interview, which was blamed on the aggressive marketing of student enrollments by other unis. Fact is that while CQU was spending a small fortune on marketing after arriving in Townsville to break JCUs monopoly JCU spent little or nothing.
    Its time Harding moved on. She spends more time on other things like the Cowboys board (what the?) than JCU. Even spends most of her time in Cairns these days.

  57. Alex Delarge says:

    The extravagance, hubris and self-indulgence of JCU has been breathtaking of late. From enormous fish tanks to multi-million dollar “safe spaces” in Cairns CBD, they have been spending like drunken sailors. I was wondering when the magic money tree was going to be stripped bare. That student centre in Cairns is amazing. No expense has been spared in the plushness of furnishings and quality of appointments. I took it upon myself to wander in the other day – the computers are top of the range. Most were being used for Facebooking and emails. Lovely little kitchenette with free coffee and biscuits. However, there is no free parking – and aren’t the entitled little treasures upset with that!

    Oh. A few years ago, a regular poster got somewhat upset on behalf of his retired merchant mariner Dad over the use of the term “spending like a drunken sailor” – which was used in a comment to desciribe the fiscal policy of Bligh’s gawdawful government. According to his Dad, drunken sailors did indeed spend prolifically when in the grip – but they stopped spending when they ran out of money.

    • Sea Eagle says:

      Interesting comment by union rep in TB today stating that if the existing EA was dispensed with and JCU staff were paid award rates “that would be about a 40 per cent pay cut”. It sounds like all areas of the JCU operations should be up for review.

  58. The Magpie says:

    EQUAL BILLING???

    The Townsville Bulletin spells out its priorities in a single front page.

    • Old Hack says:

      That stomach-turning front page has the stench of desperation and illustrates the lack of pride today’s journalists have in their craft. What these idiots don’t appear to comprehend is that that plummeting circulation and the loss of credibility are directly correlated.

      • The Magpie says:

        While Th ‘Pie obviously agrees with you, Hackster, it is the callous judgement and, a you say, just dumb thinking that astounds.

        • Scientician79 says:

          Agree on the lack of judgement.

          Interesting all these subscription offers have to be sweetened with freebies, previously tablets now headphones.

          Says all you need to know about the Astonisher – they can’t give it away.

    • Dave Nth says:

      Saw myself this morning though half asleep on the red eye run out of TSV. Mind you the CM wasn’t much better, think by the time I was seated in the Qantas Club & by boarding no more than 20 minutes. I had read what was worth reading in both the Bully & CM and had time for a quick feed… I spent more time my free copy of the Australiain transiting out of BNE then both these publications…

      I am used to low standards but both QLD papers keep plumbing new lows…

      • Dave Nth says:

        Oh forgot to mention regarding the Elliot Springs ad the nice little plug to Lendlease in the Business Section about it’s new office and use of local tradesman apparently…

  59. Achilles says:

    Major WTF decision by our “unbiased” courts who have caved in to the disingenuous carping by the self-righteous loonies on the extreme left like the Greens and Amnesty International. We have to award our hard earned to the tune of $70,000.000.

    WTF4? They attempted to violate our sovereignty illegally, by paying mega dollars to other criminals, hardly good character references for someone who is claiming the right (most abused word in the loonies dictionary) to come here.

    These same besotted legal eagles also overruled the Minister when a whole herd of these deceitful “refugees” who returned to the countries that they claimed were persecuting them for a holiday. Wonder who paid for those trips???

    Don’t be surprised if those undeserving recipients don’t collude and use their ill gotten gains to fill a plane and fly straight to Oz, Boats are slow and easy to turn away, but a plane?????

    If we must pay these parasites then deduct expenses, for food, electricity, clothing, housing, security guards etc. I have seen the conditions in “camps in Libya, Lebanon and Jordan, and Bangladesh on TV, but there’s no bleeding heart motions by the same loonies that got this piece of political correctness excesses through.

    • Critical says:

      $70m to these illegal refugees and yet our pensioners get a pittance to live on. The Greens, lefty lawyers, social engineers and associated hangers on like those at the Townsville Multicultural Support Group in Mundingburra must be having a party thinking up the next plot against decent Australians. Heard that they are asking the Mullet to proclaim Townsville a refugee welcoming zone. What next!

  60. Mike Shearer says:

    Is my maths correct?

    Texts from the TCC website indicate that it costs $27,000/day to pump 130 megalitres of water from the Burdekin. That’s $27 for 130 kilolitres. That’s $0.208/kl. Right?

    Of the 130 megalitres, between 20 and 40 will be lost to evaporation. So taking the worst case, that means 90 megalitres will be available to the community. So $27,000 is the cost of 90 megalitres, taking the cost to $0.3/kl

    Today the website indicates that 122 Megalitres is being used. At the least the TCC will be making $168,000 from the sale of the pumped water.

    The cost of water to residential properties is $1.38/kl under the Water Watcher plan and $2.89/kl under the Standard plan. So the TCC is making a profit of 460% under Water Watcher and 963% under Standard plans.

    • The Magpie says:

      Th Magpie is no great shakes at maths himself, but one things for sure Mike … The Bulletin will never be able to figure out what the hell you’re talking about, even with a calculator.

    • Cantankerous but happy says:

      Yep and what it highlights is the staggering level of shit the cities budget is. The issue here is water is a twice year charge and so the council will be anything between 3-9 months behind the cash curve, so despite making money on every drop they sell to industry and anyone on the water watcher plan they can’t afford to turn the bloody thing on for anything except keeping us from dying of thirst.

      • Scientician79 says:

        What’s not free are all the pipes, treatment plants, maintenance etc.

        In simplistic terms it doesn’t matter if you use 1L or 10,000L all the costs are fixed, there might be some small variation in chemicals and electricity but it’s not significant.

        Now charging everyone a fixed price each year to cover the above doesn’t send the right signal to encourage conservation so we have a couple of variable price arrangements which work perfectly well when you don’t have the tight restrictions we currently have.

        So now they have a large fixed cost base, reducing revenue, and the added cost of the pumping costs from the Burdekin.

        Normally in the grand scheme of the overall council $’s that additional cost is fairly minor, but after all the redundancy payments and money for hard rubbish collection and rates freezes the council coffers are looking mighty empty.

        Although they do apparently have money to splash around on Jamie Durie so who knows what’s really going on? I don’t think there’s anyone left at the Council who knows either.

        • Mike Shearer says:

          True, there’s fixed costs and overheads. But they are surely why under both the Standard plan Water Watcher plan you pay a fixed fee regardless of whether you ever actually turn on a tap. I’ve used the costs of the water itself which is built into the up-front charge then also in the excess water charges.

          My calculations might be wrong (I don’t think so) but surely the logic is right?

  61. Muz says:

    The irelevent TB, this weeks money pages, Kosh says to save on power bills by shopping between power retailers. Good luck with that here!

    • The Magpie says:

      Genius! Next, they’ll be telling us how to save water.

      • Kingswood says:

        re:power, that story sharing just works so well up and down the east coast, doesn’t it? I saw that & thought, ‘they may as well have put in an advert in its space’. Utterly irrelevant for us up here….like advertising a mitten and scarf sale…

  62. Kingswood says:

    Its great to be in the news, but….perhaps we can get a ‘big’ one of these outside the southern entrance, like the ‘Big Pineapple’ etc….

    http://www.couriermail.com.au/lifestyle/relationships/townsville-one-of-sexiest-cities-in-australia/news-story/2db584e8f6ad5404ea4e0414b37c6c24

    • The Magpie says:

      We could save money by not having a statue of The Big Dildo, just a sign saying The Big Dildo, and get Les and some of the councillors to take turns at standing next to it. Of course, have to be changed to ‘Small’ when Angry Ant Jacob takes his turn.

      • Kingswood says:

        It could act like a barometer on the economic health and prosperity of the city.

        At the moment it would be flaccid…

    • Achilles says:

      Big Pineapple? Seems appropriate considering we’ve another 2 years of being shafted with the rough end by our ship of fools.

  63. The old peterbuilt says:

    It’s me again. Just spent two days in a medical facility in Skagway Alaska . Fell in the river while fishing, took the doctors two days to find my dick. Just talking to my mate at tcc and he agrees senior staff are saying the end of the month is the end of the impaler but the cunning old mullet is trying to squeeze a few more redundancies through before she goes then any criticism can be payed on the impaler. ., the reason the impaler keeps cancelling meetings related to tenders, infastructure etc is because she is completely out of her depth and hasn’t got a clue and is leaving it to someone else to clean up the shit after she is gone. Well got to go, will be back home soon. I think this Alaskan doctor must have given me someone else’s dick, I was sure min dick was bigger than this. Cheers

    • The Magpie says:

      As always, thanks for sharing Pete. Safe journey home. And the Bulletin today says The Impaler hasn’t and isn’t going, it’s all just rumours! Wonder why they brought that up … did they read it somewhere important, so they felt they had to reply? heh heh heh

      • The Third Reader says:

        Yes saw that crap this morn, and wondered how many people lost their brekky when reading it, and also why they needed to address the “rumours” “beloved CEO” give me a break. I had a contact who worked VERY closely with this woman and described her as such a cow she was surprised the blonde bimbo did not moo.

        • The Magpie says:

          Think you will find that Ando was cleverly exercising his personal opinion with tongue firmly in cheek. And you can bet he didn’t try to dig too far to find out if there was anything else to the story.

  64. Watcher says:

    The Astonisher continually reacts to stories and comments in this blog. In fact I reckon the Pie should charge them for supplying leads.
    Latest example is the Townsville Airport rort. If it wasnt for the Magpie blog we would only get one side of the story from the Astonisher. The huge reaction in this blog over the past week has caused the Astonisher and the editor’s mate Kevin Dill to try to counter the negatives, like why Queensland Airports cant afford to upgrade even basic facilities despite making $25 million last year.

    • The Magpie says:

      The ‘Pie has long been aware that this blog is probably the biggest driver of traffic to the Bulletin site … but perhaps not for the reasons they would like. C’mon, Ben, donations are strictly confidential.

  65. Non Aligned Worker says:

    Today’s front page tells us that Mayor Jenny Hall is off to China? I have been away for a while. When did Mayor Hall start? Is she better than her predecessor?

    • Cherry Pie says:

      Whoa don’t go there! I asked a similar question a week or so back and was very quickly informed that she is on the nose in so many ways. Glad I’m not living there just now, judging by her bad press, on this blog at least.

  66. Bubble Gun says:

    State Election will be called tomorrow. Or next week. Making it 8 or 15 October.

  67. The old peterbuilt says:

    Standing in the LA international airport where the big jet engines roar. Just ran into two families from kirwan. What you doing Pete.? Catching up on the latest on the old birds nest, I reply . Won’t do that again, took me twenty minutes to get my I pad back. The two wives ,when talking about the mullet use the term TFB, you can figure that one out. They asked what was happening with the SSM debate but I couldn’t enlighten them, still coming to grips with my own lesbian tendencies, I am attracted to drunk and horny women so I must be a lesbian. They also told me a well respected and knowledgable friend of theirs who did a lot for tcc in the computer area got her pink slip last week, the jobs are still going by the hand of the mullet slash impaler. Well done pie with the latest post. Maybe the astonishes could offer you some consulting work training staff to join dots together, time to go to the bar and numb ones brain in preparation for 14hrs of cattle class.

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